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I was talking to my husband while playing A Realm Reborn and discussing my favorite boy failure as always. I said if I was broken down on the side of the road and I called Alphinaud he would come to get me, however we would get into a car accident on the way and also need to get picked up. So hubby asked me who I think among the scions would be best to call, so here are my takes on the outcome of each one.
(Reminder I'm only in ARR so these are subject to change with experience.)
Honorable Mention: Not a scion exactly, but the correct answer is always Cid. Not only would he be there fast, he would probably fix your car so you could just get wherever you're going.
Y'shtola: This is my pick. Team mom would head straight out to get you and wouldn't even complain about it. You'd get a "Well you would do the same for any of us."
Urianger: Team dad is also a responsible choice, but I feel like he would not grasp the urgency of the situation. You've survived much worse after all. I think he would try to finish his project first, lose track of time, and show up an hour later than Y'shtola would. He would play oldies on the radio and talk about his favorite ones and you would know him a little better by the time it was over.
Papalymo: He would also head straight to you, but you would have to put up with a lecture about proper car maintenance in order to avoid breakdowns like this in the future. I would rather wait a little bit longer for someone else. If Yda is with him it would take a little bit longer, but I do think she would bring snacks, so they might go up a spot based on that alone as a duo.
Tataru: Will come get you without a lecture but is not a good driver. Every turn makes you feel like you're going to overturn. Also feel like she would drive something very tiny and cute and my character is an Au Ra, so it would be a very overall uncomfy ride. She's very apologetic about it though, and we would ultimately make it home safe.
Thancred: He's drunk at a party with a girl on his lap and an arm around his shoulder, but would still leave to get you. This would lead to a wacky adventure where he eventually shows up in a stolen Oscar Meyer weiner car with someone else driving. 10/10, but you will have to finish the debacle with him and make sure that he gets home safe too.
Minfilia: Minfilia can't drive. She would call you an Uber though. You probably could have done that yourself.
Yda: Would come to get you, but she got her license revoked in an intense fit of road rage three years ago. She would call Papalymo who would additionally ask why you didn't just call him first. Better than Minfilia if she brings snacks along.
Alisaie: Not sure if she's still a scion or not, but she does have me blocked. :/
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So I found another absolute gem of a 1.0 video on YouTube, thanks to user Ro-Play.
This is the 1.0 quest "Living on a Prayer," part of the Dalamud storyline that led up to the 1.0 servers being shut down in preparation for the remade game we now know as A Realm Reborn.
At this point in canon, Nael van Darnus, the "White Raven" who had spearheaded Project Meteor, has been killed, but to everyone's great dismay, the red moon continues to fall toward Eorzea.
In a last-ditch effort to save the realm, Louisoix has inscribed the marks of the Twelve on stones around Eorzea, forming a circle around Mor Dhona. He calls upon the player character as well as Eorzea's citizens to pray for the realm's salvation, in hopes of summoning the Twelve to stop Dalamud's fall.
The adventurer's pilgrimage features dialogue with Louisoix, Yda and Papalymo, Thancred, Gaius van Baelsar, Y'shtola, and Urianger. I've transcribed the dialogue below, only replacing the name of the player character (Lucca) with [Forename].
At Apkallu Falls
Louisoix: My dear [Forename]. It does my spirit well to see you again, and none the worse for your encounter with Nael van Darnus.
Louisoix: When you accompanied Master Garlond to the floating isle, you could not have known what awaited you there, nor whether you would ever return, yet thither you went, to spare Eorzea her doom...
Louisoix: Your triumph should rightly have marked the end of this tale...alas, the fates are not so kind. Though it grieves me to say the words, the red moon of Allag... continues its descent.
Louisoix: Following Nael van Darnus's defeat, we of the Circle of Knowing maintained our vigil over Dalamud.
Louisoix: It took us little time to deduce that all was not as it should be... and rather longer to confirm our findings beyond a doubt...
Louisoix: Did the blow that felled the White Raven come too late? Or is there another force that works to bring down Dalamud?
Louisoix: Whatever the answer may be, one thing is plain: the threat of the Seventh Umbral Era yet looms nigh.
Louisoix: [Forename.] No man living could doubt your worth.
Louisoix: Eorzea has peered over the precipice countless times, yet ever were you there to draw her back from the brink.
Louisoix: Now, you must needs do so again. Heed me well, for I would entrust you with one final mission.
Louisoix: I would have you become the beacon to summon forth the Twelve—aye, the guardian deities of Eorzea.
Louisoix: Nophica, the Matron; Althyk, the Keeper; Byregot, the builder; Rhalgr, the Destroyer;
Louisoix: Azeyma, the Warden; Nald'thal, the Traders; Halone, the Fury; Menphina, the Lover...
Louisoix: Oschon, the Wanderer; Llymlaen, the Navigator; Nymeia, the Spinner; and Thaliak, the Scholar—patron deity of mine own Sharlayan.
Louisoix: Faith in the Twelve is strong in this land. By channeling that faith through prayer, we should be able to call upon their aid.
Louisoix: Alas, we cannot simply pray wheresoever we please. We must needs present ourselves before the gods, at the places where they lie in slumber.
Louisoix: Mayhap you are aware that divine symbols have manifested across the land in recent days? Well, it was by mine own hand that they did so.
Louisoix: Graven upon ancient stone, these symbols are temporal representations of the Twelve. It is before these stones that we must entreat their succor with a ritual.
Louisoix: I would have you embark on a pilgrimage to each of the locations and give fervent prayer—a prayer for Eorzea's salvation.
Louisoix: In so doing, the gods shall awaken to lend us their aid. Will you do this thing, [Forename]?
Living on a Prayer
Speaking with Louisoix at Apkallu Falls, you are shocked to learn that, in spite of Nael van Darnus's demise, Dalamud remains on its collision course with Eorzea. In order to prevent the Seventh Umbral Era from coming to pass, the Archon bids you embark on a pilgrimage to rouse the Twelve from their slumber. Divine symbols—temporal representations of the gods graven in stone--lie scattered across the land. You are to seek them out in order and, at each location, give fervent prayer for Eorzea's salvation.
Louisoix: The light of hope shines brilliantly with you, [Forename].
Louisoix: No matter how deep their slumber, the gods will surely stir in the presence of such light.
Louisoix: If you would lend me your map, I shall mark thereupon the places whither you must go.
Louisoix: The pilgrimage will take you to the farthest reaches of the land. Steel yourself for a grueling journey, and pray exercise the utmost caution.
At the Mark of Nophica
Papalymo: Ah, if it isn't young Lucca!
Yda: Helloooooo!
Yda: You're going on the pilgrimage, aren't you? Louisoix told us all about it!
Papalymo: For the love of Thaliak, Yda! Keep your voice down!
Yda: I'm so glad you've decided to save the world again! It's a real weight off my mind, I can tell you!
Papalymo: Ahem! You have my thanks also. Truth be told, I had feared you would be reluctant to help.
Papalymo: Summoning deities requires an ungodly amount of aether, after all.
Papalymo: And having manifested, sustaining even a single deity's corporeal form costs the land dearly—as you've seen for yourself.
Papalymo: Yet here we are, seeking to summon no fewer than twelve of them!
Papalymo: Channeling even a tiny portion of a deity's strength will tax you greatly.
Papalymo: Fortunately, no more than that should be needed to stay the red moon's advance. At the very least, it should be sufficient to nullify Dalamud's power and ensure Eorzea's preservation.
Papalymo: For an added blessing, the process should see some aether returned to the land—aether that Dalamud had absorbed from the primals.
Papalymo: There is yet a future for Eorzea. I, for one, believed this to be true.
Papalymo: You are of a mind with me, I trust?
Papalymo: But without further ado, let us set to work. May the Twelve keep you!
Yda: So long, [Forename]! Be safe!
Yda: I almost forgot to mention!
Yda: When you're off summoning the Twelve, don't forget to visit all thirteen places, alright!
Yda: Yeah, I was a bit puzzled about that myself, but then I realized Nald'thal has two aspects! So anyway, you heard it from me first!
At the Mark of Nald'thal
Thancred: These eyes will not be fooled—something weighs heavily on your mind.
Thancred: If I were to hazard a guess, the prospect of entreating the succor of the selfsame beings you once slew seems less than attractive? Heh. I'll not deny it's ironic.
Thancred: As you well know, aether is the source of all life. Bereft of its blessing, Eorzea would be naught but a dried-up husk of a realm.
Thancred: By whatever name they are called, gods drink of the land's aether for their sustenance. The Twelve are no different.
Thancred: Summoning them would be tantamount to bleeding the life out of the land. Yet without their aid, Eorzea is most assuredly doomed.
Thancred: Dalamud will fall, and the land will die. Even should aether still flow, life may never again blossom here.
Thancred: We cannot allow that to come to pass.
Thancred: Even as we move to stay Dalamud's descent, ever must we be mindful of the toll our actions take upon Eorzea's longevity. We spare the present at a cost to the future.
Thancred: It will be no easy thing, this balancing act.
Thancred: Yet we must see it through to the bitter end, no matter the hardship.
Thancred: Take heart, my friend, for all will be well. Victory will surely smile upon us.
Thancred: Whence comes my confidence, you ask?
Thancred: It comes from you, [Forename]. Yours is the fire of hope that will light our darkest hour.
At the Mark of Halone
Gaius Van Baelsar: I receive word that the Sharlayans have resumed their meddling...
Gaius Van Baelsar: And who should I find here but you—my old friend from the Twin Adder. Were I one to believe in such folly, I would say that our fates are intertwined.
Gaius Van Baelsar: Ah, but allow me to congratulate you on bringing down the White Raven. When word reached me, I struggled to stifle a cheer.
Gaius Van Baelsar: But what now, pray tell?
Gaius Van Baelsar: Nael van Darnus was as a god to his minions. In their blind faith, the fools have convinced themselves that the man yet lives.
Gaius Van Baelsar: Bent on finding their beloved legatus, soldiers of the VIIth have entrenched themselves at the heart of Eorzea.
Gaius Van Baelsar: They have gone so far as to send false intelligence to Garlemald, declaring Meteor a success and van Darnus a hero.
Gaius Van Baelsar: Suffice it to say, your leaders shall not long suffer the legion's presence. A clash between the Eorzean Alliance and the VIIth is inevitable.
Gaius Van Baelsar: Yet know that even as they struggle, the red moon of Allag shall come and lay this land to waste.
Gaius Van Baelsar: And the White Raven shall realize his twisted ambition from beyond the grave.
Gaius Van Baelsar: It falls to you to prevent that from happening, old friend—so be sure to fight with all your strength.
Gaius Van Baelsar: And leave me something worth conquering!
Gaius Van Baelsar: I shall enjoy watching the drama unfold from my vantage point on high. And when all is said and done, Garlemald's might standard shall rise in every corner of the realm.
Gaius Van Baelsar: Live, adventurer, and we may well meet again. I take my leave of you.
At the Mark of Llymlaen
Y'shtola: Greetings, [Forename]. Are you relishing the part of pilgrim?
Y'shtola: Hm? The stench of ceruleum hangs upon your garments.
Y'shtola: Unless I'm mistaken, you have recently crossed paths with the Empire.
Y'shtola: ...Gaius van Baelsar of the XIVth Imperial Legion? I had thought the man long withdrawn to Ala Mhigo.
Y'shtola: The Black Wolf has cooperated with us in the past, so determined was he to thwart the White Raven—but for him to divulge the VIIth's position is... unexpected.
Y'shtola: The heart of Eorzea... This could only refer to Mor Dhona, the place of convergence for aether.
Y'shtola: By our reckoning, Dalamud will fall in the region's southeast.
Y'shtola: Hence, it is there that we must channel the power of the Twelve—Louisoix himself said as much.
Y'shtola: Anticipating our plan, van Darnus would have positioned his forces at the selfsame location. The pieces certainly fit.
Y'shtola: And then there are van Baelsar's parting words...
Y'shtola: It is plain that he still hopes to deliver Eorzea into the hands of the Emperor. He is, and ever has been, a sworn enemy of the realm.
Y'shtola: Ordinarily, I would no more trust the Black Wolf than I would his namesake.
Y'shtola: Yet he is the lesser of two evils, and given what the red moon would make of the Emperor's prize—namely ash—we have no reason to dismiss his testimony.
Y'shtola: Very well. I shall relate the details of your exchange to the alliance leadership.
Y'shtola: As for you—stay the course, and do what must be done.
Y'shtola: Waken the Twelve. Let all of Eorzea bask in their radiance.
At the Mark of Thaliak
Urianger: The light of hope waxeth ever more bright...
Louisoix: Ahhh, I feel it! There can be no doubt--the gods are stirring!
Louisoix: Your presence is a boon to the realm, [Forename]. Thanks to you, we may yet prevail.
Louisoix: All that remains now is for those who abide in Eorzea to join as one in prayer. In so doing, the gods will surely descend.
Urianger: Master, forgive me mine impertinence, but the VIIth Legion yet stands betwixt us and our objective.
Louisoix: Gods forbid I forget that detail, Urianger. Aye, we must needs secure suitable grounds for the summoning, though it mean throwing the entire might of the alliance against the Empire.
Louisoix: [Forename]. Hereafter, I make ready to receive Dalamud, during which time, Thancred and the others shall go forth to marshal the will of all who abide in this land.
Louisoix: By the grace of the Twelve, let us deliver Eorzea from her doom, and usher in a new era of peace and prosperity!
Urianger: Dire though they seem upon first hearing, the words of Mezaya Thousand Eyes are, in sooth, a promise of salvation.
Urianger: Yet whence that salvation wouldst come, no man could say. Only now--as the shadow of Dalamud loometh large—doth the truth wax plain to sight.
Urianger: The valiant blades of which the seventh verse spoke betoken none other than thee and thy fellow adventurers.
Urianger: Though heavens spew crimson flame, and hells seep black dooms, by thy hand shall Eorzea look upon a new dawn.
Louisoix: Urianger speaks true. Like him, I harbor no fear for the preservation of Eorzea.
Louisoix: Your presence alone serves as ample reassurance.
Louisoix: Ever have you blazed the path, a guiding light for men to follow.
Louisoix: Where men go as one, there is life. And where there is life, there is cause to hope.
Louisoix: If I can but see you to a new future, I should want for nothing more.
Louisoix: [Forename]. As my brethren and I prepare for the hour of reckoning, I would have you slay the monstrosity that has spawned amidst the chaos.
Louisoix: Having done so, take your place at the summoning grounds—the southeastern expanse of Mor Dhona—and prepare to repel the VIIth Imperial Legion.
Louisoix: Go well, [Forename]. The blessing of the Twelve be upon you.
