tonight I am having a birthday party at a pub with a live swing band and swing dance.  It is meaningful to me in more than one way-- not only was last week (my actual birthday) my first sober birthday in many years, but, in inviting people to the pub I casually shared that I don’t drink anymore with everyone invited.  I invited about 15 of my favorite human beings, and four of them live within minutes of the place, and they all offered to let me stay over there so I wouldn’t have to drive home after the night of the party.  That seemed like a pretty good opening so I just casually mentioned that I gave up drinking.  I even said that the reason I did it was that I felt like alcohol and I have an unhealthy relationship.  At least one of them, I’m sure, was like “Oh thank God” in her head because we used to live together and I KNOW she had suspicions that I was drinking secretly and alone (I was!)  But it was much easier to share than I would have thought so I told everyone else too who didn’t know, that I wouldn’t be drinking so if they needed a ride home I was happy to be DD.  Now 15 people in my life know I’m sober, and while initially this made the addict part of my brain go “NOOOOOOOO IT IS GONNA BE SO MUCH HARDER TO CHEAT AND SNEAK A DRINK NOW!!!” the rational part of my brain answered with “EXACTLY.  This will be so, so much easier to stay sober now.”  I feel very peaceful and very excited to have this party tonight, and there will be swing dance too, which is even more exciting because swing dance is something I have put in my life deliberately to take up the time I used to use for drinking.  It has been a way I connect with other people and a hobby that forces me to get outside my comfort zone and be mindful and move my body and allllll that good stuff.  Also, have you listened to the music necessary for swing dance?! It is SO FREAKING HAPPY.  Tell me you’re sad when you listen to Nina Simone sing an upbeat love song and I will tell you you’re a liar.