#wsqk transcript

Students from Hawkins High will be out washing cars down by Bradley’s Big Buy this weekend and urge anyone, who wants to have their car, truck or wagon washed, to come on down and show their support.  

Finally, Hawkins has seen a huge spike in clackers and jarge?? [00.50min] -related mischief across the town. Residents have reported damage to garden gnomes, trashcans and fence posts. These due toys (?) and the craze linked to them is seen by many older residents as another sign of delinquency of 80s kids. 

Ugh. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

--

Vance:

Well, hey there, midnight movers. Vance Goodman on deck while Hawkins catches Zs, but at the Squawk… [various sounds on tapes, glass shattering, kid crying] Ups, wrong button, happens every time.  

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper

Another one bites the dust - Queen

Vance:

You’re listening to the WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Across Hawkins this is your station, bringing you the latest local updates for this town and the choice’s cuts around. We’re turning this town upside down with records like this.

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

In the Air Tonight - Phil Collins

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Bangles

Vance:

Oh, there ain’t no stopping these hits, Hawkins. We’re on a roll with the tunes right now! It’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. It’s Vance Goodman, transmitting from higher top the tower, across the whole darn town. Yeah, man!, The whole shebang, the whole enchilada. You know what? We’ll be right back with more major hits that get you vibing and floating up to cloud nine.

AD break (Palace Arcade, Starcourt mall,

Squawk rewind at 9 ad: It’s WSQK the Squawk, where every morning at 9, you know it’s time for the Rip Rip Rewind at 9. We spin a hit backwards and you get to figure out what it is before your friends do. Whether you’re cruising a new truck, breaking your brother into basement??? (20.50min), or training with the Tigers. We don’t judge. We just squawk-it on the air. WSQK the Squawk. The Hawkins hitmaker every day. 

Heroes - David Bowie

Twist of Fate - Olivia Newton-John

Ghostbusters theme

Vance:

Oh, yeah. This is how we do it here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Turning the music upside down for Hawkins all day long. This is the station everyone is talking about right now. Crank it up! 

I Love Rock ‘N Roll - Joan Jett & the Blackheart

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinda Carlisle

Vance: 

We are serving up hits like that to every corner of Hawkins every single day. That’s what we do on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. This is the radio station where hits for Hawkins never quit, no matter what happens in this town, we’ll never fall off the air- goddamn [pain noise, static, clanking noises]. Arhg. [Vance laughing] Got you there, didn’t I? But don’t worry, you’re safe with us. So strap yourself in for even more tunes on the Squawk next.

AD break (Palace Arcade, Hawkins Video).

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Echo Beach - Martha And The Muffins

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics

Keep On Loving You - REO Speedwagon

Vance:

Hey, what’s happening, it’s Vance Goodman and we’ll be getting the latest across town in our update for Hawkins next. Keep it locked with us here, at WSQK the Squawk.

AD break (Palace Arcade (Mad Max leaderboard, 59min) (rule Hawkins one game at a time..). Scoops Ahoy Ice Cream Parlour.)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here at Hawkins. 

Hawkins community pool is gonna close for a week to allow the pool to be drained and cleaned. This time it’s reported to not be a code brown issue. According to the management it is simply due to regular maintenance, but given all the weird stink in the area, I’ll let you make up your own mind. 

This year’s Hawkins drive-in film festival theme has been announced as “The films of the moment”, celebrating the best films of the 80s so far. Some of the biggest blockbusters of the 80s will be shown, including the recent releases like The Breakfast Club, and Crocodile Dundee. I requested E.T., but I’ve been told the organizers have decided no Sci-Fi at the moment. Apparently there’s enough strange things happening already around town without watching it on the big screen. Ugh. 

And lastly - students at Hawkins Middle school have reported the worst harvest yet from the school’s community garden. It appears the fruits and vegetables were all affected by a fungal disease. Students and teachers are baffled as to where it came from, and are calling for local gardening experts to help identify the gross looking fungus. 

That’s the latest on what’s talking in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(61.00min)

Vance:

Alright, where’s my overnight hustlers, my night owls. Hawkins, we’d be lost without you. The third shift overnight radio show from hell - that’s what you’re getting. And that’s what we’re giving. 

Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

Rio - Duran Duran

Vance:

That is the sort of tune that makes you wish you were back with your pals. Riding around town on your bikes together, blasting the radio. If that’s you, ride like the wind! You never know when it’s your last bike ride together. Anyway, let’s get more of the hits you love across Hawkins right now. Get them on, on WSQK the Squawk. 

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Push It To The Limit - Scarface

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

Vance:

Oh, man! It’s just hit [punching sound] after hit [punching sound] here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. They don’t call us the Hawkins Hitmakers for nothing, do they? I’m Vance Goodman and playing records was what I was put on this planet to do. And who knows where else [mysterious space sound]. Haha! I’m just messing with you, Hawkins. Back in a flash with more of the hits that just don’t quit, on WSQK. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, 81min)

Squawk ad:    Dial up dedication. Hey, it’s with me, Vance Goodman. I’m handing the mic over to you, Hawkins. Send a love note to your crush in geometry. Roast your brother for eating your pineapple jalapeno pizza, or send a mystery message to someone and let them spend all night wondering who it’s from. A perfect 80s song for a perfect 80s moment. 

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush 

Vance:

Hawkins! Turn the dial up to eleven! As you’re locked in to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Vance Goodman at the wheel, so strap yourself in for even more of the songs you’ll love on the Squawk.

Centerfold - The J. Geils Band 

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Don’t Go - Yazoo

Vance: 

You’re lucky enough to be listening to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. We’re Hawkins’ hottest radio station, bringing you everything you need to get by in this crazy town we call home. We’ll get back to what we do best, after a little word from some of Hawkins’ finest. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, 102.1min,, Scoops Ahoy)

Material Girl - Madonna

Sign o' the Times - Prince

Things Can Only Get Better - Howard Jones

Object Of My Desire - Starpoint

Vance:

How you doing, Hawkins? This is the frequency to audio lunacy. Vance Goodman here on WSQK the Squawk. We’ve got your town update coming up in just a moment, stay tuned, turn it up, and keep it right here.

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Hawkins Video (next adventure is just rewind away))

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update. Bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The Hawkins County Roane Department has issued a warning that Mulberry Street [that’s the street with the library, transcriber note] will be closed at the intersection this week while crews repair pot holes. Drivers should expect delays. Nothing says the 80s like bumper to bumper traffic. 

An ongoing investigation is still under way following the increased level of mysterious damage to local roads and infrastructure. It has caused multiple incidents including children falling off their bikes. Strange things have been happening in this town lately with kids on their bikes. 

The fire department is hosting their annual tug-o’-war this Sunday from noon at the fire hall. Proceeds will go towards new rescue equipment, and kids under five will get to ride in the fire truck cabin. But the fire chief has advised they will not be using the sirens or horns during the kids rides this year. They don’t want to alarm local residents following the many tragedies that have occurred in Hawkins.  

And, finally - the ladies of ??? are hosting a recipe exchange in the community hall. All are welcome and yes, desert samples will be available. I hear they’ll be making waffle towers served with butterscotch. Mmh. Favorite. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(120min)

Vance: 

Overnight crew! It’s Vance Goodman, and, yeah, Hawkins might be sleeping, but we are here at the Squawk [chicken sound], sorry, sorry. I’ll keep it down, alright. Haha, nah! Who am I kidding? Here’s another tune for you, Hawkins.

Cold As Ice - Foreigner 

Every Time You Go Away - Paul Young

Vance:

And breathe. Let’s just take a moment for that unreal record. It’s so, so good. It’s what we do here at WSQK the Squawk, so shall I just let the tunes do the talking? Yeah, I think so. So let me hit play on this.

Home Sweet Home - Motley Crue

Hip To Be Square · Huey Lewis & The News

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

Vance:

Squawking all night, squawking all day. [chicken sound] It’s WSQK. The Squawk is our name, Hawkins is our home. We’re turning this town upside down, spinning record after record. Whether you’re cruising in new wheels around town, or tuning in at home, we’re cranking out those killer tracks all day and night on the Squawk. 

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Squawk ad)

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

Poison Arrow - ABCNever Ending Story - Limahl

Vance:

WSQK is our name, I’m Vance Goodman, and this show is all about Hawkins and the hottest hits around. And a big hello to all our brave new listeners to us here at the Squawk [chicken sound]. Tell your friends to re-tune their radio and turn that dial. I’ll be on the mic and hitting play on records like this. 

And She Was - Talking Heads

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Thriller - Michael Jackson

Vance: 

What a monster record that was! This is WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and we are turning this town upside down. [technical difficulties, lowered voice] Down. Down. Down. [electrical surges]. What was that? We’re good, right? Hawkins, uh, can you still hear us, yeah? Right, okay. Yeah. So, Vance Goodman is the name, and I’m keeping you company on WSQK the Squawk. Someone really needs to sort the power out at this place, huh? Don’t touch that dial. Hopefully we will be back right after this. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Hawkins Video)

Bicycle Race - Queen

These Dreams - Heart

Wipe Out - The Ventures

The Whole Of The Moon - The Waterboys

Vance:

No, that can’t be the last track of my show?! Oh. It is? Okay. You’re locked in to WSQK and coming up it’s your girl, Mindy Flare. She’s brilliant, she’s fresh, and she’s got a stack of hot hits, ready to play you, across Hawkins. You know the deal, stick around. 

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Palace Arcade).

02 - Mindy's Early Risers on WSQK

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins’ update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins.

Residents at the north end of town were without power for nearly two hours last night after a transformer reportedly shorted out. Utility crews restored service around 10.15. No injuries have been reported, witnesses say they saw a group of kids on bikes cycling away from the scene. Hawkins Utilities are investigating this outage, but have said the investigation may take some time due to the back log of additional cases they’re still investigating. 

Students from Hawkins High Marching Band will hold a car wash this Saturday from nine to one in the parking lot. Look out for Hawkins High Tigers directing traffic. Donations help fund new instruments ahead of the great season to allow them to expand the repertoire to include current 80s hits.

And, the Hawkins public works crew have advised that Cherry Oak Drive will be closed today, near to the Brimborne Steelworks. Repairs will be taking place to a sink hole for around two weeks. Please follow the diversion signs.

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Islands In The Streams - Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers

Should I Stay Or Should I Go -  The Clash

Sunglasses At Night - Corey Hart

Mindy:

What a rockin’ tune that was! It’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Coming up we’ve got some of the best tunes of the decade, oh, you better believe it. Grab a strong cup of the good stuff, sit back, relax and turn up that dial across Hawkins with great records like this.   

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

I’m Still Standing - Elton John

Mindy:

Well, that song - colder than an extra slushie with two straws and zero regrets. Whatever you were doing, that just made it eleven times better. It’s Mindy Flare here on the Squawk [chicken sound]. We know what’s going up and going down in Hawkins, oh yes, so strap yourselves in, it’s going to be a bumpy ride with more of the biggest hits for Hawkins. On the way next. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade (leaderboard still MadMax).

Squawk ad - same as day before. Handing the mic over to you, Hawkins.  

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

With Or Without You - U2

Africa - Toto

Mindy:

Oh, yeah, we play the biggest hits on the Squawk [chicken sound] and we’re beaming our signal all across this town. But for some reason, Hawkins, we’ve still got a little bit of that static on the line. Must be that weird weather coming in. But it’s coming in fast. So, hey, if your reception drops, the basement - that’s the best place you’re gonna honker down, get that good signal down there, okay? So while you make your move downstairs, keep it locked to WSQK. 

Girls On Film - Duran Duran

Rock This Town - The Stray Cats

American Pie - Don McLean 

Mindy:

It’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m your girl behind the mic, Mindy Flare, dusting off the records, dialing it up to the max, spinning more of the songs you love across Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk next.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Scoops Ahoy)

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

Alive And Kicking - Simple Minds

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

Tainted Love - Soft Cell

Mindy:

Hey, oh hi, Hawkins, this is your girl, Mindy Flare. We’ll be getting the latest across town in our update for Hawkins next. Keep it locked. WSQK the Squawk.

AD Break (Starcourt mall)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Work has started on the WSQK radio tower in Hawkins after reports of static interference disrupting output across the town. We’re assured the problem is minor and any excessive static can be resolved by resetting your radio. It’s the 80s and that’s the best they can offer?

Off and on again? Crazy. 

Hawkins residents were treated to an afternoon of scales, tails, feathers and a surprising amount of hissing, as the Hawkins reptile and critter showcase took over Hawkins middle school last weekend. The event was the largest collection of cold blooded creatures the town has ever seen, including boa constrictors, geckos, tortoises, and a surprisingly friendly iguana named Mr. Wiggles. There was only one incident reported when an overly friendly Venus flytrap took a liking to a nosy child’s pinkie.

And it was a tough time for the Tigers, as Hawkins High’s Basketball team struggled through their game against the Panthers. Half the team came down with a mysterious illness on the way to the game, but coach Carlton has high hopes for their comeback game next week. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Goooooo Tigers! 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(61.45min)

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

Self Control - Laura Branigan

Mindy:

This is how we do it here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Mhm, turning the music upside down for Hawkins. This is the station everyone’s talking about right now, let’s keep this train rolling with some killer [static interference] tunes here on WSQK.

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

Take My Breath Away - Berlin

Mindy:

It’s your magical, musical maestro, Miss Mindy Flare on the Squawk, and hey, guys, isn’t it amazing what you find when you’re not even looking? So, I’m driving home yesterday, and stop by this yard sale in Hawkins. I find me this cool little thing, this ham radio and guess what? It’s five bucks. And this awesome skateboard that’s covered in bright colors. Gosh. I think it had a Madrid sticker on it. Just a couple of bucks! It’s gonna look so rad on my wall! Keep us locked in for more great tunes from the best decade on the Squawk.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Squawk rewind ad), 

Waiting For A Girl Like You - Foreigner

Here I Go Again - Whitesnake

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Bangles  [first repeat of a song]

Mindy:

Broadcasting across Hawkins, we’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and me, oh hey, I’m Mindy Flare, your Hawkins honey behind the microphone in this mighty fine town. You know what we need? A tune that’s gonna turn this town upside down. Like this.

Heroes - David Bowie  [another first repeat]

She’s Got You - Patsy Cline

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics [also another repeat]

Mindy:

What’s up, Hawkins? It’s Mindy Flare, keeping you company with some of the hottest tunes of the moment. You’re dialed in to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Your one stop shop for all of the goings-on around Hawkins. Stay right there, we’re gonna get you back to the music real soon. After this.

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Hawkins Video)

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper [repeat]

White Wedding pt. 1 - Billy Idol

Ghostbusters theme

Owner Of A Lonely Heart - YES

Mindy:

Another totally wicked tune for ya, Hawkins, on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. I’m your Hawkins honey, Mindy Flare. Don’t touch that dial. I’m lining up records, turning up the volume to eleven! [slight static interference] Bringing you the latest update of Hawkins right after this.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Bradley’s Big Buy)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The civic theatre troupe is putting the finishing touches to their new production of “Ghosts In The Basement”, which opens next week at the auditorium in town. 

The Hawkins High art club has unveiled its mural on the gymnasium wall. A colorful salute to the town’s founders. The principal said the mural is one of the best uses of school paint he’s seen in decades and perfectly portrays where we are in 80s artist culture.

And, if you’re looking for a good read, the Book-mobil will be parked outside Bradley’s Big Buy all day, featuring a fresh batch of donated paperbacks. Everything from Anne of Green Gables to The Hobbit and more. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

Talking In Your Sleep - The Romantics

Mindy:

You’re locked into Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and Hawkins, I’ve seen the future. On the weekend I was at my friend Gary’s house, and he brought out his brand new shiny cam recorder. Unbelievable. Now, I’m a newbie to these things, but get this: he plugged it into the back of the TV, and here I was, on the TV screen, and, oh yeah, I looked good. I’m famous! I’m on the radio and the TV. What’s next? The movies? Oh boy. Next stop, Hollywood megastar Mindy Flare! Whoo! I’d be on cloud eleven, if that ever happens. Wait, wait, that’s not the saying. It’s cloud nine, right? 

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

Workin’ For A Livin’ - Huey Lewis and The News

Mindy:

I know, I know, I know. I don’t want it to end either, Hawkins. What a record that was. Hey, it’s your girl Mindy Flare, bringing the best beats to get you on your feet. Hahaha, hey, I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it. I’ve got loads more tunes on the way to get you grooving on the Squawk [chicken sound].

AD Breaks (Hawkins Video)

Who Wants To Live Forever - Queen

Heart And Soul - T’Pau

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Mindy:

Oh, I’m having way too much fun, Hawkins. I hope you are, too. It’s WSQK the Squawk [sound of flickering lightbulbs.. reminiscent of morse code.. static interference] Hold on, we’re getting reports of some interference across the airwaves, some kind of signal. [continuous beeping..] Our tech guy is looking into it. [lowered voice “some kind of signal”, beeping continues]. Any luck? [more beeping]. Now? Nothing? [beeping faintly continues] Alright, what can you do, M? Let’s just drown them out, shall we? 

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush 

White Rabbit - Jefferson Airplane

Material Girl - Madonna

Mindy:

Well, I’m waiting for someone to give me a Hawkins high five for playing that one. What a hit! That’s what we do here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. How are you doing? I’m Mindy Flare and, uh, don’t mind me, just finishing off my shopping list here. I gotta shoot to the store, you know what tomorrow night is? It’s casserole night. Oh boy. Listen up, Hawkins. So, my grandma, she loved casserole. My mom loves casserole, so guess who also loves casserole. Obviously me! Think about it - the show? Quite a lot like casserole, hm? All baked with love, giving you this warm, gooey feeling inside, ah. And I’ll serve up even more tasty tracks next on the Squawk.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Scoops Ahoy)

Every Breath You Take - The Police

Never Tear Us Apart - INXS

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Cars - Gary Numan

Mindy:

That’s how we do it! Hey, Mindy Flare here, and it’s time to go, sorry. Vance Goodman is next on the Squawk with some of the biggest hits of this great decade of ours. Keep it locked to WSQK.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Starcourt mall)

03 - The WSQK Wake Up with Vance Goodman

UPDATE 

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here at Hawkins. 

The Hawkins Bowling alley at the Starcourt mall has announced its first ever bowling marathon. So get polishing those shoes and practicing your swing. It’ll be an all day and all night bowl-athon to support the town’s youth recreation program. Participants can expect the best 80s music and you can bring your own mixtapes. Plus, there will be midnight pizza slices and bottomless soda refills including floats and malts. 

Across Hawkins there have been more reports of an unsightly amount of rotten pumpkins and other produce. Local farmers and gardeners say that it is nothing like they’ve observed in the 80s before. Meanwhile town officials spoke earlier today to reassure residents that the rotten pumpkins is not the result of any pollution or chemical leaks.  Question is, do we believe them? Hm. 

And due to a spade of recent thefts from homes across Hawkins, there will be an increase in overnight police patrols. Residents are encouraged to report suspicious activity - (muffled) there’s been plenty of that lately - and to ensure their doors and windows are locked at night, and they don’t leave their kids’ bikes and skateboards outside. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

It’s the WSQK wake up! [ringing sound] We’re the Squawk [chicken sound] Ha, I bet that woke you up. You’ve made it to another day alive, and well, I’m Vance Goodman, let’s do this for a brand new day, Hawkins. 

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Forever Young - Alphaville

Vance:

That is the sort of tune that makes you wish you were back with your pals. Riding around town on your bikes together, blasting the radio. If that’s you, ride like the wind! You never know when it’s your last bike ride together. Anyway, let’s get more of the hits you love across Hawkins right now. Get them on, on WSQK the Squawk. 

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

Round And Round - RATT

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

Vance:

Can we just let it sink in? Yeah, let it settle. That track was something else. I’m Vance Goodman on WSQK the Squawk, transmitting from the Squawk tower of power across this town, up and down, all around. If you’re cruising in your wheels or skateboarding through the streets, then I’ve got your soundtrack sorted next. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Starcourt mall)

Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

Time (Clock Of The Heart) - Culture Club

Home Sweet Home - Motley Crue

Vance:

And breathe. Let’s just take a moment for that unreal record. It’s so, so good. It’s what we do here at WSQK the Squawk, so shall I just let the tunes do the talking? Yeah, I think so. So let me hit play on this.

The Reflex - Duran Duran

Cold As Ice - Foreigner 

Smalltown Boy - Bronski Beat [!! first usage of this song on the Squawk]

Vance:

Oh, Hawkins, we’re not messing around. How good does that sound? Pretty sweet, aye? It’s your boy, Vance Goodman coming at ya on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Don’t go anywhere, because I have another tasty stack of steaming and saucy tunes coming your way after a little word from some of Hawkins finest.

AD Break (Palace Arcade,  (MadMax leaderboard), Scoops Ahoy)

Wipe Out - The Ventures

Big Love - Fleetwood Mac

Islands In The Streams - Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers

Runaway - Bon Jovi

Vance:

This is the music that keeps Hawkins rocking. You’re listening to Vance Goodman on the Squawk [chicken sound] and don’t touch that dial, as the latest update for Hawkins is coming your way next.

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Scoops Ahoy, Bradley’s Big Buy)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Residents across Hawkins reported being awakened by an unrecognizable roar and a strange fiery glow at around 1.14 AM last night. Town officials have assured locals that it was most likely due to a rock slide at the quarry. However investigations are ongoing. 

The annual Hawkins job fair returns next month to the public library and organizers say this year’s event is shaping up to be the biggest one yet. Representatives from more than forty local businesses, including Melvald’s general store, the Hideaway bar, Radio Shack and Hawkins Video will be on hand looking for fresh faces to join their teams. So, Hawkins teens, listen up, this is your opportunity to get off your backsides and earn some dollars. 

And finally - Could Hawkins be home to the next big band of the 80s? Open auditions are being held in the town hall next weekend for bands, groups and double acts to perform in front of the panel of judges. The winner will get to headline the Hawkins Fun Fair next summer. Get down bright and early to book your slot. Organizers, however, have said they will not be accepting entries from heavy metal bands. I think we know why that is, don’t we? Thanks, Hellfire Club’s Corroded Coffin. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(62min)

Vance:

Good morning, Hawkins! If you’re not feeling funky and fresh yet this morning, don’t worry. Get those waffles warming, and this tune a-blasting.

Things Can Only Get Better - Howard Jones

U Got The Look - Prince

Vance:

WSQK is our name, I’m Vance Goodman, and this show is all about Hawkins and the hottest hits around. And a big hello to all our brave new listeners to us here at the Squawk [chicken sound]. Tell your friends to re-tune their radio and turn that dial. I’ll be on the mic and hitting play on records like this. 

Should I Stay Or Should I Go -  The Clash

Moving In Stereo - The Cars

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Vance:

Yeah, that’s a boombox blaster, and a roller skate romancer. Hawkins, it’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. What? We, uh, we’ve had- what? Right, I gotta read this out. Yeah? Okay, right. Uh, Hawkins, pin those ears back, listen up now. There’s reports of a missing car that Hawkins PD are still trying to track down, so if you spot a cream colored Cadillac convertible around town, uh, make sure you let the sheriff’s office know, okay?  transcriptor not: the only car that the search gives is the car that Hopper and Joyce stole in s3 with the plate name TDFTHR) Right, well, uh, that’s done. Stay here for more wicked hits on WSQK. [Off mic - Yeah, I bet whoever roll in that car is a total lame-o. Haha, jerk.] Oh. The mic! Damn. 

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

Africa - Toto

Kids Wanna Rock - Bryan Adams

Never Ending Story - Limahl

Vance:

We’re WSQK the Squawk for Hawkins. Vance Goodman is my name and I’m spinning records all day long. We can keep the fun and the music flowing right here, so why don’t you sit back, relax, and let me do all the work? But, not if you’re driving! Keep those hands on the wheel! We don’t need any more accidents around here, Hawkins. Thank you. 

Who’s Crying Now - Journey

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

Boys Don’t Cry - The Cure

Vance:

It’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m the guy behind the mic, Vance- [lowered voice “Vance”, static interference, sad chicken sound]. Don’t touch that dial. I’ll be back spinning more of the songs you love across Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk next.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Starcourt mall)

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

Enola Gay - Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark

Bicycle Race - Queen

The One I Love - R.E.M.

Vance:

How you doing, Hawkins? This is the frequency to audio lunacy. Vance Goodman here on WSQK the Squawk. We’ve got your town update coming up in just a moment, stay tuned, turn it up, and keep it right here.

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

UPDATE  [same as the update from 24th of Nov.]

Time now for another Hawkins update. Bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The Hawkins County Roane Department has issued a warning that Mulberry Street will be closed at the intersection this week while crews repair pot holes. Drivers should expect delays. Nothing says the 80s like bumper to bumper traffic. 

An ongoing investigation is still under way following the increased level of mysterious damage to local roads and infrastructure. It has caused multiple incidents including children falling off their bikes. Strange things have been happening in this town lately with kids on their bikes. 

The fire department is hosting their annual tug-o’-war this Sunday from noon at the fire hall. Proceeds will go towards new rescue equipment, and kids under five will get to ride in the fire truck cabin. But the fire chief has advised they will not be using the sirens or horns during the kids rides this year. They don’t want to alarm local residents following the many tragedies that have occurred in Hawkins.  

And, finally - the ladies of ??? are hosting a recipe exchange in the community hall. All are welcome and yes, desert samples will be available. I hear they’ll be making waffle towers served with butterscotch. Mmh. Favorite. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(121min)

Vance: 

Hawkins! Hawkins!! This is your morning warning! [alarm bell ringing sound] Hahaha, hey, well, you don’t wanna be late for punching in for the nine-to-five, do you? It’s Vance, Vance Goodman on the WSQK Wake Up: The Dawn Patrol, with wicked awesome records ready to play you all morning, like this.

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Lovergirl - Teena Marie

Vance: 

You’re locked in to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. We’re your eyes and ears across all of Hawkins. Did you see the sky last night? It lit up like a Christmas tree! I’ve never seen so many shooting stars! So rad to see. Those pink and red colors? Crazy! Keeping the records rolling right now, with this on the Squawk.

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

Green Green Grass Of Home - Tom Jones

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Bangles

Vance: 

Hawkins! You deserve one of these right now [audience applause sound] Why? Oh, because you’re locked in to the Hawkins hitmaker WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], the radio station broadcasting into every corner of this mighty fine town, from the County Line Diner, (transcriptor note: The County Line Cafe was where Owens took El for food.. in Nevada..), to Hawkins Video. Oh, by the way, uhh, what that beta tape (?? 139min) kept in the back so that nobody else can rent it, yeah? Great, thanks so much. We’re your gateway to great tunes. Remember: We’re turning this town upside down. Even more hits queued up next on the Squawk. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

Heroes - David Bowie 

Don’t Dream It’s Over - Crowded House 

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics

Vance: 

[chicken sound] It’s the Squawk and we keep Hawkins moving all day long, all night long too, but, hey, have you heard if you’re going to fill your tank with gas, then, quite a few places are dry - something to do with all the road closures stopping the trucks getting through, but uh, we’ll keep you in the know with our Hawkins updates every single hour, make sure you listen in, alright? Good. 

(transcriptor note  - first the communal pool was drained, then the sky had weird pink and red colors at 1.14 am, then gas is drying out.. liquids being gone? Hawkins turning Upside Down where there’s no liquids? Red skies?)

Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division

American Pie - Don McLean 

Heat Of The Moment - Asia

Vance: 

Enjoying the new sound of Hawkins, it’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m your guy behind the mic, Vance Goodman. We’re really putting all our blood, sweat and tears into this. [static interference, repeating the prev. sentence in lowered voice] Not again! [clicking sounds] We’re still on, yeah? [chicken sound] Tell you what - it’s a battle to just keep on the airwaves, but, Hawkins, we’re here for you! You’re locked in to WSQK the Squawk. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Scoops Ahoy) 

Ghostbusters theme

Highway To Hell - AC/DC

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

Dream A Little Dream Of Me - Ella Fitzgerald, Louis Armstrong

Vance:

What a song! Oh, you know what, I’ll take a bow for that one. I’ll take any credit I can get nowadays. It’s Vance Goodman on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound] and do not go anywhere, because Mindy Flare is stepping in next, and I need to have a word with her. She’s always stealing my chocolate pudding cups from the Squawk canteen. I even put my name on it and everything, the little piece of tape. I know it’s you, Mindy. Anyway, she’s on next with the biggest hits for Hawkins and the latest happenings around town. [shouting off mic: I want my pudding cup!]

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy)

04 - The Rewind At 9 With Mindy Flare On WSQK

UPDATE  (repeated from before)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Residents across Hawkins reported being awakened by an unrecognizable roar and a strange fiery glow at around 1.14 AM last night. Town officials have assured locals that it was most likely due to a rock slide at the quarry. However investigations are ongoing. 

The annual Hawkins job fair returns next month to the public library and organizers say this year’s event is shaping up to be the biggest one yet. Representatives from more than forty local businesses, including Melvald’s general store, the Hideaway bar, Radio Shack and Hawkins Video will be on hand looking for fresh faces to join their teams. So, Hawkins teens, listen up, this is your opportunity to get off your backsides and earn some dollars. 

And finally - Could Hawkins be home to the next big band of the 80s? Open auditions are being held in the town hall next weekend for bands, groups and double acts to perform in front of the panel of judges. The winner will get to headline the Hawkins Fun Fair next summer. Get down bright and early to book your slot. Organizers, however, have said they will not be accepting entries from heavy metal bands. I think we know why that is, don’t we? Thanks, Hellfire Club’s Corroded Coffin. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Morning, Hawkins. WSQK is pumping out 50.000 Watts of the biggest songs for your morning at work. This is Mindy Flare. Go get yourself a coffee, a donut, you worked hard already this morning. This is just for you.

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

Vienna - Ultravox

Mindy:

This is the station turning Hawkins upside down. We’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], where we spin the biggest records all day long, and it’s time to get those brains working, Hawkins, as we bring you the Rewind At Nine. The ultimate test where we hit play on a record, but it’s turned upside down. Your job is to work out what it is. But first, crank this one up on the Squawk.

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Waiting For A Girl Like You - Foreigner

Invisible Touch - Genesis

Mindy:

Yeah! That’s what I’m talking about this morning. Don’t go anywhere, Hawkins. More big tunes and Rewind At Nine coming up next on the Squawk. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy)

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Take Me On - a-ha  [static interference]

Mindy:

Oh, we are spoiling you today, Hawkins. What a song. You’re listening to WSQK the Squawk with me, hi, I’m Mindy Flare. I need you to get your best detective skills ready, okay? We’re gonna play the Rewind At Nine, sponsored by Hawkins Video- Hawkins’ hippest hangout for all your movie night needs. The name of the game is simple - I’m gonna play you a song and you need to tell me what that song is. Well, we know things are never that simple in Hawkins - we flip that song upside down. Yep. Not feeling so confident now, are you? Let’s do it. 

[part of a song being played backwards]

Oooh, we’re really testing you today, aren’t we? Don’t touch that dial. It’s WSQK the Squawk. 

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

What Have You Done For Me Lately - Janet Jackson

Mindy:

Hit me up and spin me upside down! That’s a grooving tune to start the day. Hawkins, how are we feeling? It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk. Hopefully, I’ve given you enough time for your brain to recover after this morning’s Rewind At Nine. Now it’s time to find out what song we’ve played in reverse. Good luck.

[first playing the song again in reverse, then correctly: Livin’ On A Prayer - Bon Jovi]

Ooohh, how did you do? It was a tough one, I know, but, Hawkins, you’re not gonna let me down. Well done if you’ve managed to name that tune, and hey, if not - don’t worry. This next one is definitely the right way around. This is WSQK.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Starcourt mall)

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush 

Paradise City - Guns N’ Roses

Monster Mash - Bobby Pickett

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Mindy: 

This is tune after tune, isn’t it? It’s WSQK and you’re listening to Mindy Flare on the Squawk. Don’t touch that dial. The latest update for Hawkins is coming your way next.

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Palace Arcade)

05 - Mindy Flare in the Mornings

UPDATE 

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here at Hawkins. 

Police are appealing for information after stop signs have gone missing from intersections on Olive Branch Road and Randolph Lane. Hawkins police department’s deputy Andy has said “I would like to remind students that removing street signs is a serious offence that could lead to accidents and prosecutions. And this disregard for public property will not simply be put down as 80s kids just being kids. We will apprehend the perpetrators and prosecute.” That’s one unhappy cop. 

There have been reports of some signs being found around the junkyard. Anyone with information should contact the police department.  

The Hawkins Paws & Claws Club held its annual pet show at the fair grounds last weekend. Top honors went to a rabbit named Mr. Whiskers, owned by a twelve-year old Jody Lee. 

And the Hawkins High School AV Club has restored the old movie projector in the gym, meaning Friday movie nights are officially back. Submissions for screening requests and tickets are available at the school office for all students and school families. The first screening will feature by popular demand a re-screening of Neverending Story. Pause, spoiler - it does end. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy: 

Well, hey, handsome. Yeah, Hawkins, I’m talking about you, baby. This is WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Good morning with Mindy Flare, that’s me, the queen of the mic, playing you nothing but tunes you like.

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Mindy: 

You’re listening to the Hawkins hottest station WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. I’m Mindy Flare with everything you need to face another day in this crazy town we call home. Hawkins, get this next one turned all the way up.  

Human - The Human League

Angel - Madonna

Whip It - Devo

Mindy:  (repeated)

It’s your magical, musical maestro, Miss Mindy Flare on the Squawk, and hey, guys, isn’t it amazing what you find when you’re not even looking? So, I’m driving home yesterday, and stop by this yard sale in Hawkins. I find me this cool little thing, this ham radio and guess what? It’s five bucks. And this awesome skateboard that’s covered in bright colors. Gosh. I think it had a Madrid sticker on it. Just a couple of bucks! It’s gonna look so rad on my wall! Keep us locked in for more great tunes from the best decade on the Squawk.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Hawkins Video, Starcourt mall)

Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

Home Sweet Home - Motley Crue

Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley

Mindy:

You’re listening to the Hawkins hottest station WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. I’m Mindy Flare with everything you need to face another day in this crazy town we call home. Hawkins, get this next one turned all the way up.  

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper

Atomic - Blondie

Who Wants To Live Forever - Queen 

Mindy:

It’s WSQK the Squawk. Hey, hey. Why, how do you do? I’m Mindy Flare, your queen on the radio machine. I’m broadcasting across Hawkins and whether you’re strolling down the store, or cycling through the streets, this is the radio station playing the tunes for you. Stay right there and I’ll get another Hawkins hit on next, on WSQK the Squawk. 

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Palace Arcade)

Girls On Film - Duran Duran

Hungry Heart - Bruce Springsteen

Islands In The Streams - Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers

Need You Tonight - INXS

Mindy:

Another totally wicked tune for ya, Hawkins, on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. I’m your Hawkins honey, Mindy Flare. Don’t touch that dial. I’m lining up records, turning up the volume to eleven! [slight static interference] Bringing you the latest update of Hawkins right after this.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Hawkins Video)

UPDATE  (repeated from before)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The Hawkins Police Department have put out another plea - reminding teenage residents of Hawkins that the junkyard is not to be used as a skatepark. And they warned that anyone caught will be escorted home and their parents spoken to. Doesn’t sound like much of a punishment to me. 

Hawkins high school marching band is hosting a fundraiser this week to raise money for their new uniforms. Let’s be honest - they’re well overdue. Those things look like they belong to the 70s, not the 80s. 

Students from Hawkins High will be out washing cars down by Bradley’s Big Buy this weekend and urge anyone, who wants to have their car, truck or wagon washed, to come on down and show their support.  

Finally, Hawkins has seen a huge spike in clackers and jarge?? [00.50min] -related mischief across the town. Residents have reported damage to garden gnomes, trashcans and fence posts. These due toys (?) and the craze linked to them is seen by many older residents as another sign of delinquency of 80s kids. 

Ugh. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Hawkins. Hawkins! This is your mid-morning warning! [air horns] Haha! You’re almost half way through. Hey, I said almost. Not quite, okay? It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK with wicked records ready to play you all day long, like this. 

Wipe Out - The Ventures

Should I Stay Or Should I Go -  The Clash

Mindy:

WSQK the Squawk, keeping things rocking across Hawkins. Mindy Flare on the mic, and I’m playing hits across town all day, every day. The red light is on [slight static interference] in the studio, whoo! And the tunes, they’re blasted out of the speakers, like this. 

I Would Die 4 U - Prince

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Dance Hall Days - Wang Chung

Mindy:

Ohh, I’m out of breath. I was dancing around the studio to that one. It’s your Hawkins honey, Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. It’s my turn to get one of my favorite songs next, and there’s nothing you can do about it. But, you’re gonna love it, trust me. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

Never Ending Story - Limahl

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

Silent Running (On Dangerous Ground) - Mike + The Mechanics

Mindy:

This is the Squawk [chicken sound] and I’m Mindy Flare, your queen of the controls on the WSQK studio. And I got a way to get this off my chest, Hawkins. I was at home, waiting for a package earlier, and the mailman - he pulls up, he walks in through my front yard, he knocks on the door and he takes off. So, get this - he doesn’t shut the gate behind him. He leaves it there, swinging in the wind! I went out and I yelled “Close the gate!” He didn’t hear me. “Close the gate!” So if you’re listening, mail dude, next time remember - close the gate! Ugh. Thanks, Hawkins. Uh, whatever, and it’s over, here’s..I’m not gonna apologize to you guys for that. I’m gonna put the next record on, okay? On the Squawk.

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

I Melt With You - Modern English

Africa - Toto

Mindy:

Another huge tune provided by yours truly. It’s Mindy Flare, spinning the records for you, Hawkins, and I’m about to hit play on the next song, and oh! It’s a good one. Don’t touch that dial. You’re not gonna wanna miss this.

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Bradley’s Big Buy)

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Obsession - Animotion

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

Alone - Heart

Mindy: 

Playing that for you, Hawkins. I gotta get outta here. The master of the universe, my He-man, Vance Goodman up next with all the biggest hits right here on WSQK the Squawk. Don’t touch that dial.

AD Break (Starcourt mall)

06 - The Afternoon Hangout with Vance Goodman

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Hawkins community pool is gonna close for a week to allow the pool to be drained and cleaned. This time it’s reported to not be a code brown issue. According to the management it is simply due to regular maintenance, but given all the weird stink in the area, I’ll let you make up your own mind. 

This year’s Hawkins drive-in film festival theme has been announced as “The films of the moment”, celebrating the best films of the 80s so far. Some of the biggest blockbusters of the 80s will be shown, including the recent releases like The Breakfast Club, and Crocodile Dundee. I requested E.T., but I’ve been told the organizers have decided no Sci-Fi at the moment. Apparently there’s enough strange things happening already around town without watching it on the big screen. Ugh. 

And lastly - students at Hawkins Middle school have reported the worst harvest yet from the school’s community garden. It appears the fruits and vegetables were all affected by a fungal disease. Students and teachers are baffled as to where it came from, and are calling for local gardening experts to help identify the gross looking fungus. 

That’s the latest on what’s talking in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

Where’s my lunchtime legends at? Rock on! (Road call?? 1.32 min) Put down that sandwich and crank this up. It’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m serving up hot lunch and even hotter hits like this.

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

Every Breath You Take - The Police

Vance:

And breathe. Let’s just take a moment for that unreal record. It’s so, so good. It’s what we do here at WSQK the Squawk, so shall I just let the tunes do the talking? Yeah, I think so. So let me hit play on this.

The Way It Is - Bruce Hornsby

Cold As Ice - Foreigner 

Kids In America - Kim Wilde

Vance:

Hawkins! We’re serving up records with more flavor than a bag of crunchy corn chips [crunchy chip sound]. It’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. And, uh, have you seen the bodacious blue beast machine around town? It’s the Squawk Van. Oh yeah. She’s a pretty thing, ain’t she? We can take our hits on the highway [car horn sound]! Hey, I really should be allowed to give the Van a spin, I mean, it’s literally in my name. Vance? Van? I could be the man in the van! The Vance in the… van.. yeah. Nothing says radio road show like broadcasting from the drive outside my house. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy)

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Babattlefngles

It’s Only Love - Bryan Adams

American Pie - Don McLean 

Vance:

Broadcasting across Hawkins, we’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and I’m Vance Goodman on the mic across this mighty fine town. So whether you’re trying to complete that last square on the Rubik’s cube, or skateboarding down to the store, we got even more records queued up on WSQK the Squawk. Let’s hit it.

Where The Streets Have No Name - U2

Ghostbusters theme

Separate Ways - Journey

Vance:

Oh, there ain’t no stopping these hits, Hawkins. We’re on a roll with the tunes right now! It’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. It’s Vance Goodman, transmitting from higher top the tower, across the whole darn town. Yeah, man!, The whole shebang, the whole enchilada. You know what? We’ll be right back with more major hits that get you vibing and floating up to cloud nine.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Palace Arcade)

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Don’t Go - Yazoo

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Vance:

How you doing, Hawkins? This is the frequency to audio lunacy. Vance Goodman here on WSQK the Squawk. We’ve got your town update coming up in just a moment, stay tuned, turn it up, and keep it right here.

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

07 - Talk To Tammy On WSQK The Squawk

UPDATE 

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The 32nd annual County Fair is calling for volunteers to help when it returns to Hawkins. They’re especially looking for folks who can help with set up and local live music performers, following last year’s terrifying performance by Hellfire Club’s Corroded Coffin. This year they’re looking for new bands to get up on the stage and sing current 80s hits. Sign-up sheets are on the bulletin board at the town hall.

The Hawkins middle school’s science club reports that their homemade weather balloon successfully reached ‘way up there’ last week before floating off over the border. They’re hoping to retrieve it once it’s landed. We’ll update you when it’s brought back to Hawkins. 

The annual Science Fair is back next month, organizers would like to remind all entries - live pets or animals of any kind are not permitted as entries after the pollywog incident. 

Meanwhile, the Chamber of Commerce reminds everyone that nominations are still open for the annual ‘Friendly Face of Hawkins’ award. So if your neighbors are the type to shovel your sidewalk, or help mend your broken fence - which we’ve seen in an increasing amount of over recent times - drop your nomination in entry boxes at Hawkins community pool. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. There’s no lunch time lull here, baby. You’re cruising with WSQK. I’m Vance Goodman, your midday man with the masterplan. Whether you’re riding with the brown bag brigade, or grinding through that 9-5, you’re locked in to the one and only Hawkins hitmaker. Keep it right here! 

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics

Material Girl - Madonna

Vance:

Oh, hold on. Let me just put my lunch down, and just applaud that track [applause sound]. Yes, yes, yes, what a tune! [sound of something falling] Oh, man. I just got some peanut butter and jelly on the mic. Gross. Anyway, uh, Hawkins, you’re listening to WSQK, it’s the Squawk [chicken sound]. Hah, that chicken is clearly excited for what’s happening next, as Talk to Tammy is on the way. So, if your life’s getting tangled, tense or downright dramatic, stay right there, because Tammy is about to serve up the side of wisdom for your afternoon. She’s on the mic after this on the Squawk.

Everything Count - Depeche Mode

Bicycle Race - Queen

We Built This City - Starship

Vance:

I will never, ever, ever, eveeeer get bored of hearing that song. What a record it is on WSQK. It’s the Squawk and I’m Vance Goodman, and do you need some advice? Well, don't look at me for it. I’m the kinda guy that locks his keys in the, uh, in the truck, while the engine’s running, of course. But, uh, you know who you can trust, Hawkins? Are you ready? You got a problem? You need your mommy? It’s time to Talk to Tammy [cheering sound].

Tammy:

Hi, Hawkins! Today’s letter is from Suspicious in Brooke View (?): Tammy, a blue sedan has been parking in front of our house every afternoon [car horn sound].  A woman sits inside for forty minutes, then leaves. My husband’s convinced it’s espionage.

Uh, darling, I’ve learnt a long time ago to stop asking questions like that in this town. [police siren sound]. But, in this instance, I think you’re just seeing one tired mama taking a well-earned break. Oh, don’t we all know that? Next time she’s there, why don’t you bring her a nice bubbling cup of hot tea? Tap on that window and quietly say: “You take your time.” We got to look out for each other in Hawkins, ya hear that, Alan (Ellen?)? Uh, my producer needs a permanent break. But, you just be kind to everyone out there, okay? Thanks, Hawkins. I’m Tammy, and I’ll be back to talk to ya’ll more tomorrow. You stay safe out there. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

Living On The Ceiling - Blancmange

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Vance:

Whohoo, where did we pull that record from? Oh, my goodness. The chillpill we didn’t know we needed. I absolutely loved hearing that. Hope you’re feeling that too, Hawkins. It’s WSQK. I am Vance Goodman, and allow me to interrupt there, chillzone, with this [chicken sound].  Well, we are the Squawk, you know, for Hawkins. And let’s not stop here, shall we? Let’s get another great record on now.

99 Red Balloons (99 Luftballons) - Nena

Things Can Only Get Better - Howard Jones

The Ghost In You - The Psychedelic Furs 

Vance:

Enjoying the new sound of Hawkins, it’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m your guy behind the mic, Vance Goodman. We’re really putting all our blood, sweat and tears into this. [static interference, repeating the prev. sentence in lowered voice] Not again! [clicking sounds] We’re still on, yeah? [chicken sound] Tell you what - it’s a battle to just keep on the airwaves, but, Hawkins, we’re here for you! You’re locked in to WSQK the Squawk. 

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Bradley’s Big Buy)

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Heroes - David Bowie

Livin’ On A Prayer - Bon Jovi 

Vance: 

This is the music that keeps Hawkins rocking. You’re listening to Vance Goodman on the Squawk [chicken sound] and don’t touch that dial, as the latest update for Hawkins is coming your way next.

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Hawkins Video)

08 - The Afternoon Hangout with Vance Goodman

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Residents across Hawkins reported being awakened by an unrecognizable roar and a strange fiery glow at around 1.14 AM last night. Town officials have assured locals that it was most likely due to a rock slide at the quarry. However investigations are ongoing. 

The annual Hawkins job fair returns next month to the public library and organizers say this year’s event is shaping up to be the biggest one yet. Representatives from more than forty local businesses, including Melvald’s general store, the Hideaway bar, Radio Shack and Hawkins Video will be on hand looking for fresh faces to join their teams. So, Hawkins teens, listen up, this is your opportunity to get off your backsides and earn some dollars. 

And finally - Could Hawkins be home to the next big band of the 80s? Open auditions are being held in the town hall next weekend for bands, groups and double acts to perform in front of the panel of judges. The winner will get to headline the Hawkins Fun Fair next summer. Get down bright and early to book your slot. Organizers, however, have said they will not be accepting entries from heavy metal bands. I think we know why that is, don’t we? Thanks, Hellfire Club’s Corroded Coffin. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

Tunes all afternoon here at WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. So if you’re hustling, Hawkins, we’ll take all your stress away with the best tunes for this town, (?? 1.42min).

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush 

Vance:

Oh hoho. Records like that [applause sound], we know that’s what Hawkins wants to hear on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Coming up next, I’ve got some of the best tunes of the decade. I’ll tell you what - the 80s is sounding great, isn’t it? And we’re only like just over halfway through. So, I’ll tell you what - grab a big cup of joe or a fresh fizzy pop, lock that basement or bedroom door shut so no one can disturb your groove, and get ready for another great record like this. 

Working For The Weekend - Loverboy

Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

Crazy, Crazy Nights - KISS

Vance:

What a monster record that was! This is WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and we are turning this town upside down. [technical difficulties, lowered voice] Down. Down. Down. [electrical surges]. What was that? We’re good, right? Hawkins, uh, can you still hear us, yeah? Right, okay. Yeah. So, Vance Goodman is the name, and I’m keeping you company on WSQK the Squawk. Someone really needs to sort the power out at this place, huh? Don’t touch that dial. Hopefully we will be back right after this. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy)

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

If You Leave - OMD

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper

Vance:

Oh, yeah. This is how we do it here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Turning the music upside down for Hawkins all day long. This is the station everyone is talking about right now. Crank it up! 

How Soon Is Now? - The Smiths

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Mony Mony - Billy Idol 

Vance:

Oh, man! It’s just hit [punching sound] after hit [punching sound] here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. They don’t call us the Hawkins Hitmakers for nothing, do they? I’m Vance Goodman and playing records was what I was put on this planet to do. And who knows where else [mysterious space sound]. Haha! I’m just messing with you, Hawkins. Back in a flash with more of the hits that just don’t quit, on WSQK. 

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Hawkins Video)

Islands In The Streams - Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers

Girls On Film - Duran Duran

Sign o' the Times - Prince

Wipe Out - The Ventures

Vance:

Vance Goodman, the voice for Hawkins, keeping you company on WSQK the Squawk. And we’ve got all your latest from this fine town coming up next, so stay right where you are on WSQK the Squawk.

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Work has started on the WSQK radio tower in Hawkins after reports of static interference disrupting output across the town. We’re assured the problem is minor and any excessive static can be resolved by resetting your radio. It’s the 80s and that’s the best they can offer?

Off and on again? Crazy. 

Hawkins residents were treated to an afternoon of scales, tails, feathers and a surprising amount of hissing, as the Hawkins reptile and critter showcase took over Hawkins middle school last weekend. The event was the largest collection of cold blooded creatures the town has ever seen, including boa constrictors, geckos, tortoises, and a surprisingly friendly iguana named Mr. Wiggles. There was only one incident reported when an overly friendly Venus flytrap took a liking to a nosy child’s pinkie.

And it was a tough time for the Tigers, as Hawkins High’s Basketball team struggled through their game against the Panthers. Half the team came down with a mysterious illness on the way to the game, but coach Carlton has high hopes for their comeback game next week. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Goooooo Tigers! 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance: 

We’re cruising through the day, Hawkins. Vance Goodman on the mic, and I’ve got your music fix all afternoon long. 

Waiting For A Girl Like You - Foreigner

Should I Stay Or Should I Go -  The Clash

Vance: 

WSQK is our name, I’m Vance Goodman, and this show is all about Hawkins and the hottest hits around. And a big hello to all our brave new listeners to us here at the Squawk [chicken sound]. Tell your friends to re-tune their radio and turn that dial. I’ll be on the mic and hitting play on records like this. 

The Way You Make Me Feel - Michael Jackson

Never Ending Story - Limahl

Why Can’t This Be Love - Van Halen

Vance: 

Oh, now that’s a tune to crank ‘til your mullet curls. Well, uh, it would if I had hair. A Vance is the name and the Squawk is the Barbed Wire Play Pen, where I get down. And, uh, Hawkins, don’t go anywhere. With tune on the way, which is guaranteed to make the hair on the back of your neck stand up and salute. I’ll tell you what - it’s a monster hit, trust me, you’re gonna love it. 

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

I Love Rock ‘N Roll - Joan Jett & the Blackheart

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

Vance: 

And breathe. Let’s just take a moment for that unreal record. It’s so, so good. It’s what we do here at WSQK the Squawk, so shall I just let the tunes do the talking? Yeah, I think so. So let me hit play on this.

Little Lies - Fleetwood Mac

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Rosanna - Toto

Vance: 

You’re lucky enough to be listening to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. We’re Hawkins’ hottest radio station, bringing you everything you need to get by in this crazy town we call home. We’ll get back to what we do best, after a little word from some of Hawkins’ finest. 

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Bradley’s Big Buy)

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

The One I Love - R.E.M.

Spookie Movies - Gary Paxton

Hammer To Fall - Queen

Vance: 

No, that can’t be the last track of my show?! Oh. It is? Okay. You’re locked in to WSQK and coming up it’s your girl, Mindy Flare. She’s brilliant, she’s fresh, and she’s got a stack of hot hits, ready to play you, across Hawkins. You know the deal, stick around. 

AD Break (Hideaway Bar (first time playing..))

09 - The Hawkins Homerun with Mindy Flare

UPDATE 

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here at Hawkins. 

The Hawkins Bowling alley at the Starcourt mall has announced its first ever bowling marathon. So get polishing those shoes and practicing your swing. It’ll be an all day and all night bowl-athon to support the town’s youth recreation program. Participants can expect the best 80s music and you can bring your own mixtapes. Plus, there will be midnight pizza slices and bottomless soda refills including floats and malts. 

Across Hawkins there have been more reports of an unsightly amount of rotten pumpkins and other produce. Local farmers and gardeners say that it is nothing like they’ve observed in the 80s before. Meanwhile town officials spoke earlier today to reassure residents that the rotten pumpkins is not the result of any pollution or chemical leaks. Question is, do we believe them? Hm. 

And due to a spade of recent thefts from homes across Hawkins, there will be an increase in overnight police patrols. Residents are encouraged to report suspicious activity - [muffled] there’s been plenty of that lately - and to ensure their doors and windows are locked at night, and they don’t leave their kids’ bikes and skateboards outside. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Mindy Flare with ya for the Hawkins Homerun. Finishing out work, or you’re at home, waiting for the family chaos to begin, this is WSQK the Squawk, and I’m serving up the biggest songs from the greatest decade. Let’s go.

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Mindy:

This is the Squawk [chicken sound] and I’m Mindy Flare, your queen of the controls on the WSQK studio. And I got a way to get this off my chest, Hawkins. I was at home, waiting for a package earlier, and the mailman - he pulls up, he walks in through my front yard, he knocks on the door and he takes off. So, get this - he doesn’t shut the gate behind him. He leaves it there, swinging in the wind! I went out and I yelled “Close the gate!” He didn’t hear me. “Close the gate!” So if you’re listening, mail dude, next time remember - close the gate! Ugh. Thanks, Hawkins. Uh, whatever, and it’s over, here’s..I’m not gonna apologize to you guys for that. I’m gonna put the next record on, okay? On the Squawk.

Mad World - Tears For Fears 

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Babattlefngles

Just Like Heaven - The Cure 

Mindy:

You’re lucky enough to be listening to WSQK the Squawk, Hawkins hottest station, bringing you everything you need to get by in this crazy town we call home. We’ll get back to the tunes next after a little word from our sponsors.

AD Break (Hawkins Hunting & Camping - new one)

American Pie - Don McLean 

Animal - Def Leppard

Ghostbusters theme

Mindy:

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, there’s no lull here, baby. Just hit, after hit, after hit, on WSQK the Squawk. [chicken sound] I mean, we don’t call ourselves the Hawkins hitmaker for nothing. This is Mindy Flare, and Hawkins, it’s not just me keeping you company across this fine town. We’ve got Vance Goodman on the schedule. He brings you Dial-A-Dedication every night at 7. He’s a great guy, just wish he’d stop asking to take me out to Drive-In every week. Anyway. Make sure you get him on for huge boombox blasting tunes on the Squawk.

Nocturnal Me - Echo & the Bunnymen

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Tainted Love - Soft Cell

Mindy:

Well, that song - colder than an extra slushie with two straws and zero regrets. Whatever you were doing, that just made it eleven times better. It’s Mindy Flare here on the Squawk [chicken sound]. We know what’s going up and going down in Hawkins, oh yes, so strap yourselves in, it’s going to be a bumpy ride with more of the biggest hits for Hawkins. On the way next. 

AD Break (Melvald’s General Store - new ad. Bradley’s Big Buy)

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Karma Chameleon - Culture Club

Material Girl - Madonna

Echo Beach - Martha And The Muffins

Mindy:

Mindy Flare is the name, playing tunes is my game, and I’m the voice for Hawkins. Keeping you company on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. We’ve got all your latest from this fine town coming up next, so stay right where you are on WSQK the Squawk.

AD Break (Community Pool - new ad)

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update. Bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The Hawkins County Roane Department has issued a warning that Mulberry Street [that’s the street with the library, transcriber note] will be closed at the intersection this week while crews repair pot holes. Drivers should expect delays. Nothing says the 80s like bumper to bumper traffic. 

An ongoing investigation is still under way following the increased level of mysterious damage to local roads and infrastructure. It has caused multiple incidents including children falling off their bikes. Strange things have been happening in this town lately with kids on their bikes. 

The fire department is hosting their annual tug-o’-war this Sunday from noon at the fire hall. Proceeds will go towards new rescue equipment, and kids under five will get to ride in the fire truck cabin. But the fire chief has advised they will not be using the sirens or horns during the kids rides this year. They don’t want to alarm local residents following the many tragedies that have occurred in Hawkins.  

And, finally - the ladies of ??? are hosting a recipe exchange in the community hall. All are welcome and yes, desert samples will be available. I hear they’ll be making waffle towers served with butterscotch. Mmh. Favorite. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Tunes, tunes and more tunes for your journey home, Hawkins. Come on, time to clock out and time to dial in to WSQK the Squawk.

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Mindy:

Broadcasting across Hawkins, we’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and me, oh hey, I’m Mindy Flare, your Hawkins honey behind the microphone in this mighty fine town. You know what we need? A tune that’s gonna turn this town upside down. Like this.

Centerfold - The J. Geils Band 

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

Call Me - Blondie

Mindy:

It’s WSQK the Squawk, and I’m your girl behind the mic, Mindy Flare, dusting off the records, dialing it up to the max, spinning more of the songs you love across Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk next.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy)

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Edge Of Seventeen - Stevie Nicks

Mindy:

This is the Squawk, and Hawkins [static interference. Lowered, slowed-down voice “This is the Squawk”. Chicken sound. More static flickering. “Mindy-”] Hawkins is our home. I’m Mindy Flare and whether you’re on the clock and putting in the hours, or you’re kicking back and enjoying these tubular tunes that I got fixed on WSQK the Squawk.

The Look Of Love - ABCLove Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Temptation - New Order

Mindy:

Broadcasting across Hawkins, we’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and I’m Mindy on the mic across this mighty fine town. So whether you’re trying to smash the high scores down at the Arcade, or skateboarding down to the store, we got even more records queued up on WSQK the Squawk.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Palace Arcade) 

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

Paradise City - Guns N’ Roses

Sweet Child O’ Mine - Guns N’ Roses

Mindy:

How you doing, Hawkins? Mindy Flare here on WSQK the Squawk. We’ve got your town update coming up in just a moment, stay tuned, turn it up, and keep it right here.

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Hawkins Video)

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins’ update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins.

Residents at the north end of town were without power for nearly two hours last night after a transformer reportedly shorted out. Utility crews restored service around 10.15. No injuries have been reported, witnesses say they saw a group of kids on bikes cycling away from the scene. Hawkins Utilities are investigating this outage, but have said the investigation may take some time due to the back log of additional cases they’re still investigating. 

Students from Hawkins High Marching Band will hold a car wash this Saturday from nine to one in the parking lot. Look out for Hawkins High Tigers directing traffic. Donations help fund new instruments ahead of the great season to allow them to expand the repertoire to include current 80s hits.

And, the Hawkins public works crew have advised that Cherry Oak Drive will be closed today, near to the Brimborne Steelworks. Repairs will be taking place to a sink hole for around two weeks. Please follow the diversion signs.

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

We’re cruising all the way home, Hawkins. Mindy Flare on the mic. Sit back, relax, wind down that window, and crank this one up! On WSQK the Squawk.

Africa - Toto

Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

Mindy:  (repeated)

You’re locked into Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and Hawkins, I’ve seen the future. On the weekend I was at my friend Gary’s house, and he brought out his brand new shiny cam recorder. Unbelievable. Now, I’m a newbie to these things, but get this: he plugged it into the back of the TV, and here I was, on the TV screen, and, oh yeah, I looked good. I’m famous! I’m on the radio and the TV. What’s next? The movies? Oh boy. Next stop, Hollywood megastar Mindy Flare! Whoo! I’d be on cloud eleven, if that ever happens. Wait, wait, that’s not the saying. It’s cloud nine, right? 

Cloudbusting - Kate Bush

Home Sweet Home - Motley Crue

Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinda Carlisle

Mindy:

Well, I’m waiting for someone to give me a Hawkins high five for playing that one. What a hit! That’s what we do here on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. How are you doing? I’m Mindy Flare and, uh, don’t mind me, just finishing off my shopping list here. I gotta shoot to the store, you know what tomorrow night is? It’s casserole night. Oh boy. Listen up, Hawkins. So, my grandma, she loved casserole. My mom loves casserole, so guess who also loves casserole. Obviously me! Think about it - the show? Quite a lot like casserole, hm? All baked with love, giving you this warm, gooey feeling inside, ah. And I’ll serve up even more tasty tracks next on the Squawk.

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

Things Can Only Get Better - Howard Jones

Running With The Night - Lionel Richie

Bicycle Race - Queen

Mindy:

Another awesome song to get you going, Hawkins. This is WSQK the Squawk. I hear we are on loud at Bradley’s Big Buy right now. Hey, I wanna see you moving and grooving in the aisles like you’re bagging those bargains. This is for you.

Object Of My Desire - Starpoint

Girls On Film - Duran Duran

Rock This Town - The Stray Cats

Mindy:

You know what, Hawkins? That song, it always reminds me of Battle of the Bands at Hawkins High back in the day. Oh boy, so many great memories. The gym? It’s seen some science, if you know what I mean. If those walls could talk. The Snowballs, the Science Fairs, and some of the best slamdunk in basketball you’ll ever see. GO TIGERS! Haha, good times. Apart from that awkward first kiss, let’s, uh, let’s not get into that one. Even more hits are queued up next on the Squawk.

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Bradley’s Big Buy) 

Wipe Out - The Ventures

Don’t You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds

Waiting For A Girl Like You - Foreigner

Jessie’s Girl - Rick Springfield

Mindy: 

Playing that for you, Hawkins. I gotta get outta here. The master of the universe, my He-man, Vance Goodman up next with all the biggest hits right here on WSQK the Squawk. Don’t touch that dial.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy)

10 - Dial-A-Dedication with Vance Goodman

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The Hawkins Police Department have put out another plea - reminding teenage residents of Hawkins that the junkyard is not to be used as a skatepark. And they warned that anyone caught will be escorted home and their parents spoken to. Doesn’t sound like much of a punishment to me. 

Hawkins High School Marching band is hosting a fundraiser this week to raise money for their new uniforms. Let’s be honest - they’re well overdue. Those things look like they belong in the 70s, not the 80s. 

Students from Hawkins High will be out washing cars down by Bradley’s Big Buy this weekend and urge anyone, who wants to have their car, truck or wagon washed, to come on down and show their support.  

Finally, Hawkins has seen a huge spike in clackers and jarge(??) -related mischief across the town. Residents have reported damage to garden gnomes, trashcans and fence posts. These due toys (?) and the craze linked to them is seen by many older residents as another sign of delinquency of 80s kids. 

Ugh. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

Woohoo! Survived another day, am I right, Hawkins? It’s Vance the man with the plans. So, c’mon, let’s turn the town upside down on WSQK the Squawk.

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics

Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper

Vance:

Well, alright, I’m handing over the mic to you, Hawkins. It’s a Dial-A-Dedication on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. You’re taking over the airwaves with your shoutouts. Kicking things off tonight with a big shout going for Owen, Eric, Nick, and Randall - the Star Hawk squad, holding it down in the basement. That last jam was for you, boys. Shoutouts is what we do after 7 every single night. Want us to spin a record for your best buddy? Or say a big happy birthday to that special someone in Hawkins? Come on, tell the town! This next bop and beep goes out to Cassey, who has just landed her first set of wheels, she’ll be tearing up the roads in her new ride across Hawkins all the way up to all Highway 77. Turn up those  cars’ stereos to this, Hawkins, on WSQK. 

Never Surrender - Corey Hart

Should I Stay Or Should I Go -  The Clash

Kiss - Prince

Vance:

Vance Goodman is the name, Hawkins is the place I call home, and Shouts is the name of the game. It’s Dial-A-Dedication on WSQK the Squawk. Give a big Hawkins hands to Danny and the team at Ace Hardware, working late and blasting us out through the shop’s speakers, the helpful hardware place. That last killer tune was for you and the gang. Another roar in Hawkins shoutout coming in for the Tigers of Hawkins High. Coach says they’ve been drilling dives and blitzing hard all evening, and they’ve earned a proper victory lap tune. I’ll be back spinning more of the songs you love across Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk next.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Hawkins Video)

Angel - Madonna

Rock You Like A Hurricane - Scorpions

Never Ending Story - Limahl

Vance:

It’s WSQK and Shouts is the name of the game. It’s Dial-A-Dedication, the show to lock into every night at 7, crank it up and rip the knob off! We’re the Squawk and we’re turning the music upside down in this town. I span that last record for Tiff, who is building a terrarium for her frog, called Dart. Oh man, I hate frogs. Time to squeeze in one last big Hawkins how-you-doing for Curtis, who is moving out of town and heading off to the big city this weekend. Hawkins will miss you, buddy. This is for you, on WSQK the Squawk.

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

I’m Still Standing - Elton John 

Vance:  (repeated)

We are serving up hits like that to every corner of Hawkins every single day. That’s what we do on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. This is the radio station where hits for Hawkins never quit, no matter what happens in this town, we’ll never fall off the air- goddamn [pain noise, static, clanking noises]. Arhg. [Vance laughing] Got you there, didn’t I? But don’t worry, you’re safe with us. So strap yourself in for even more tunes on the Squawk next.

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Scoops Ahoy)

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

I Wanna Dance With Somebody - Whitney Houston  (first time they played this song)

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Palace Arcade)

11 - Evenings with Vance Goodman On WSQK

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins.

Hawkins community pool is gonna close for a week to allow the pool to be drained and cleaned. This time it’s reported to not be a code brown issue. According to the management it is simply due to regular maintenance, but given all the weird stink in the area, I’ll let you make up your own mind. 

This year’s Hawkins drive-in film festival theme has been announced as “The films of the moment”, celebrating the best films of the 80s so far. Some of the biggest blockbusters of the 80s will be shown, including the recent releases like The Breakfast Club, and Crocodile Dundee. I requested E.T., but I’ve been told the organizers have decided no Sci-Fi at the moment. Apparently there’s enough strange things happening already around town without watching it on the big screen. Ugh. 

And lastly - students at Hawkins Middle school have reported the worst harvest yet from the school’s community garden. It appears the fruits and vegetables were all affected by a fungal disease. Students and teachers are baffled as to where it came from, and are calling for local gardening experts to help identify the gross looking fungus. 

That’s the latest on what’s talking in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Vance:

Well, another day might be done, Hawkins, but we’re not stopping with the tubular tunes on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Let’s get gnarly!

California dreamin’ - The Mamas & The Papas

Rebel Yell - Billy Idol 

Vance:

It’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Hey, I’m Vance Goodman, broadcasting across Hawkins, and whether you’re strolling down the Arcade or hiding out in the basement playing some Dungeons & Dragons, this is the radio station playing the tunes for you. Let’s get another Hawkins hit on for you now on WSQK the Squawk.

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

Spellbound - Siouxsie And The Banshees

Islands In The Streams - Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers

Vance:

Oh, Hawkins, we’re not messing around. How good does that sound? Pretty sweet, aye? It’s your boy, Vance Goodman coming at ya on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Don’t go anywhere, because I have another tasty stack of steaming and saucy tunes coming your way after a little word from some of Hawkins finest.

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Forever Young - Alphaville

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Vance:

We’re WSQK the Squawk for Hawkins. Vance Goodman is my name and I’m spinning records all day long. We can keep the fun and the music flowing right here, so why don’t you sit back, relax, and let me do all the work? But, not if you’re driving! Keep those hands on the wheel! We don’t need any more accidents around here, Hawkins. Thank you. 

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult

Every Breath You Take - The Police

Vance:

Can we just let it sink in? Yeah, let it settle. That track was something else. I’m Vance Goodman on WSQK the Squawk, transmitting from the Squawk tower of power across this town, up and down, all around. If you’re cruising in your wheels or skateboarding through the streets, then I’ve got your soundtrack sorted next. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Scoops Ahoy)

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Who’s Crying Now - Journey

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

Rio - Duran Duran

Vance:

What a song! Oh, you know what, I’ll take a bow for that one. I’ll take any credit I can get nowadays. It’s Vance Goodman on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound] and do not go anywhere, because Mindy Flare is stepping in next, and I need to have a word with her. She’s always stealing my chocolate pudding cups from the Squawk canteen. I even put my name on it and everything, the little piece of tape. I know it’s you, Mindy. Anyway, she’s on next with the biggest hits for Hawkins and the latest happenings around town. [shouting off mic: I want my pudding cup!]

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Bradley’s Big Buy)

12 - Late Nights with Mindy Flare on WSQK

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

The 32nd annual County Fair is calling for volunteers to help when it returns to Hawkins. They’re especially looking for folks who can help with set up and local live music performers, following last year’s terrifying performance by Hellfire Club’s Corroded Coffin. This year they’re looking for new bands to get up on the stage and sing current 80s hits. Sign-up sheets are on the bulletin board at the town hall.

The Hawkins middle school’s science club reports that their homemade weather balloon successfully reached ‘way up there’ last week before floating off over the border. They’re hoping to retrieve it once it’s landed. We’ll update you when it’s brought back to Hawkins. 

The annual Science Fair is back next month, organizers would like to remind all entries - live pets or animals of any kind are not permitted as entries after the pollywog incident. 

Meanwhile, the Chamber of Commerce reminds everyone that nominations are still open for the annual ‘Friendly Face of Hawkins’ award. So if your neighbors are the type to shovel your sidewalk, or help mend your broken fence - which we’ve seen in an increasing amount of over recent times - drop your nomination in entry boxes at Hawkins community pool. 

That’s what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Tonight it’s all about tunes. One down, and crank up the dial to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], the Hawkins hitmaker.

Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon

Cars - Gary Numan

Mindy:

Hawkins, turn that dial up to eleven as you’re locked in to WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. Mindy Flare at the wheel, so strap yourself in for even more songs you love on the Squawk. 

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Bangles

We’ll Meet Again - Vera Lynn

Hammer To Fall - Queen

Mindy: (repeated)

It’s your magical, musical maestro, Miss Mindy Flare on the Squawk, and hey, guys, isn’t it amazing what you find when you’re not even looking? So, I’m driving home yesterday, and stop by this yard sale in Hawkins. I find me this cool little thing, this ham radio and guess what? It’s five bucks. And this awesome skateboard that’s covered in bright colors. Gosh. I think it had a Madrid sticker on it. Just a couple of bucks! It’s gonna look so rad on my wall! Keep us locked in for more great tunes from the best decade on the Squawk.

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

Tie A Yellow Ribbon ‘Round The Ole Oak Tree - Dawn

Workin’ For A Livin’ - Huey Lewis and The News

Ghostbusters theme

Mindy: 

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, there’s no lull here, baby. Just hit, after hit, after hit, on WSQK the Squawk. [chicken sound] I mean, we don’t call ourselves the Hawkins hitmaker for nothing. This is Mindy Flare, and Hawkins, it’s not just me keeping you company across this fine town. We’ve got Vance Goodman on the schedule. He brings you Dial-A-Dedication every night at 7. He’s a great guy, just wish he’d stop asking to take me out to Drive-In every week. Anyway. Make sure you get him on for huge boombox blasting tunes on the Squawk.

Take Me Home - Phil Collins

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Imagination - Belouis Some

Mindy: 

Transmitting from the WSQK tower to your ears. It’s Mindy Flare on the Squawk. Now, listen to this: last night, for the first time ever, I tried my first microwavable meal. Yeah! And, Hawkins, you’re not gonna believe this: I was sitting in my kitchen, having some hot and tasty three-day-old meatloaf. In two minutes! This is the future! I cannot wait to show my mom. And don’t you worry, the hot, hot hits continue next on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound].

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Scoops Ahoy). 

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Walking On Sunshine - Katrina & The Waves

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division

Mindy: 

We’re on fire today, aren’t we? You’re with Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], bringing you the tunes that keep Hawkins bouncing. Stick around. The latest from across town is coming up, right after this.

AD Break (Hawkins Video)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins. 

Work has started on the WSQK radio tower in Hawkins after reports of static interference disrupting output across the town. We’re assured the problem is minor and any excessive static can be resolved by resetting your radio. It’s the 80s and that’s the best they can offer?

Off and on again? Crazy. 

Hawkins residents were treated to an afternoon of scales, tails, feathers and a surprising amount of hissing, as the Hawkins reptile and critter showcase took over Hawkins middle school last weekend. The event was the largest collection of cold blooded creatures the town has ever seen, including boa constrictors, geckos, tortoises, and a surprisingly friendly iguana named Mr. Wiggles. There was only one incident reported when an overly friendly Venus flytrap took a liking to a nosy child’s pinkie.

And it was a tough time for the Tigers, as Hawkins High’s Basketball team struggled through their game against the Panthers. Half the team came down with a mysterious illness on the way to the game, but coach Carlton has high hopes for their comeback game next week. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Go Tigers. Goooooo Tigers! 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Hawkins! You’ve made it through the day. The blood, sweat and tears [static interference] but it was worth it, right? WSQK the Squawk, with you all night long.

Cold As Ice - Foreigner 

Never Say Goodbye - Bon Jovi

Mindy:

You’re locked into Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and Hawkins, I’ve seen the future. On the weekend I was at my friend Gary’s house, and he brought out his brand new shiny cam recorder. Unbelievable. Now, I’m a newbie to these things, but get this: he plugged it into the back of the TV, and here I was, on the TV screen, and, oh yeah, I looked good. I’m famous! I’m on the radio and the TV. What’s next? The movies? Oh boy. Next stop, Hollywood megastar Mindy Flare! Whoo! I’d be on cloud eleven, if that ever happens. Wait, wait, that’s not the saying. It’s cloud nine, right? 

Running Up That Hill - Kate Bush 

Kids Wanna Rock - Bryan Adams

Africa - Toto

Mindy:

I know, I know, I know. I don’t want it to end either, Hawkins. What a record that was. Hey, it’s your girl Mindy Flare, bringing the best beats to get you on your feet. Hahaha, hey, I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it. I’ve got loads more tunes on the way to get you grooving on the Squawk [chicken sound].

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy)

Heroes - David Bowie

Travelin’ Man - Ricky Nelson

Things Can Only Get Better - Howard Jones

Mindy:

Hey, there, Hawkins. It’s Mindy Flare here, and I was just saying to the guys in the office- so I’m getting so excited because later this week we’re having a girls’ night. No boys allowed. Romantic comedies, we’re gonna do our nails, we’re gonna gossip, naturally. So, my friend, Jenny, she’s bringing her (?? phone? can’t understand..). It’s going to be awesome. But have you guys noticed there’s so many eerie voices out there recently? Dogs barking. But everyone knows the rule no. 1: Always keep the curtains drawn. (??.. muffled). You’re listening to the Squawk [chicken sound].

You’re The Voice - John Farnham

American Pie - Don McLean 

Drive - The Cars

Mindy: 

Transmitting from the WSQK tower to your ears. It’s Mindy Flare on the Squawk. Now, listen to this: last night, for the first time ever, I tried my first microwavable meal. Yeah! And, Hawkins, you’re not gonna believe this: I was sitting in my kitchen, having some hot and tasty three-day-old meatloaf. In two minutes! This is the future! I cannot wait to show my mom. And don’t you worry, the hot, hot hits continue next on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound].

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Scoops Ahoy)

Here Comes The Rain Again - Eurythmics

Enola Gay - Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark

Material Girl - Madonna

Mindy:

Hey, oh hi, Hawkins, this is your girl, Mindy Flare. We’ll be getting the latest across town in our update for Hawkins next. Keep it locked. WSQK the Squawk.

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Hawkins Video)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update. We’re bringing you the latest from right here at Hawkins. 

The Hawkins Bowling alley at the Starcourt mall has announced its first ever bowling marathon. So get polishing those shoes and practicing your swing. It’ll be an all day and all night bowl-athon to support the town’s youth recreation program. Participants can expect the best 80s music and you can bring your own mixtapes. Plus, there will be midnight pizza slices and bottomless soda refills including floats and malts. 

Across Hawkins there have been more reports of an unsightly amount of rotten pumpkins and other produce. Local farmers and gardeners say that it is nothing like they’ve observed in the 80s before. Meanwhile town officials spoke earlier today to reassure residents that the rotten pumpkins is not the result of any pollution or chemical leaks.  Question is, do we believe them? Hm. 

And due to a spade of recent thefts from homes across Hawkins, there will be an increase in overnight police patrols. Residents are encouraged to report suspicious activity - (muffled) there’s been plenty of that lately - and to ensure their doors and windows are locked at night, and they don’t leave their kids’ bikes and skateboards outside. 

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

Mindy:

Another day might be done, Hawkins, but we’re not stopping with the tubular tunes at WSQK the Squawk. 

Wipe Out - The Ventures

Everywhere - Fleetwood Mac

Mindy:

Oh, I’m having way too much fun, Hawkins. I hope you are, too. It’s WSQK the Squawk [sound of flickering lightbulbs.. reminiscent of morse code.. static interference] Hold on, we’re getting reports of some interference across the airwaves, some kind of signal. [continuous beeping..] Our tech guy is looking into it. [lowered voice “some kind of signal”, beeping continues]. Any luck? [more beeping]. Now? Nothing? [beeping faintly continues] Alright, what can you do, M? Let’s just drown them out, shall we? With killer hits like this. 

Pass The Dutchie - Musical Youth

Psycho Killer - Talking Heads

Girls On Film - Duran Duran

Mindy:

Ohh, I’m out of breath. I was dancing around the studio to that one. It’s your Hawkins honey, Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. It’s my turn to get one of my favorite songs next, and there’s nothing you can do about it. But, you’re gonna love it, trust me. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

Time After time - Cyndi Lauper

China In Your Hand - T’Pau

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Mindy:

Broadcasting across Hawkins, we’re WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound], and me, oh hey, I’m Mindy Flare, your Hawkins honey behind the microphone in this mighty fine town. You know what we need? A tune that’s gonna turn this town upside down. Like this.

Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

Blue Monday - New Order

Mindy:

Another huge tune provided by yours truly. It’s Mindy Flare, spinning the records for you, Hawkins, and I’m about to hit play on the next song, and oh! It’s a good one. Don’t touch that dial. You’re not gonna wanna miss this.

AD Break (Palace Arcade, Scoops Ahoy)

Fire And Rain - James Taylor

Atomic - Blondie

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

The One I Love - R.E.M.

Mindy:

What a bow! That’s all from me right now, Hawkins. Vance Goodman is up next with all the biggest tunes, and some of that questionable humor, right here on the Squawk. Don’t go anywhere.

Mindy:

Tonight, Hawkins, we’re partying like it’s our last… day of the year! Well, hey, it is! It’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party! [chicken sound] And I’m Mindy Flare [static interference] oh- oh.. just ignore that. Probably just the tower playing up again. But you know, no matter what’s going on out there, Hawkins, we’re gonna keep this party going! So let’s keep this party train rolling! All aboard! [train horn sound] Our next stop - this tubular tune, right here on the Squawk.

I Wanna Dance With Somebody - Whitney Houston

Cold As Ice - Foreigner 

Big Time - Peter Gabriel

Mindy:

That song right there - that might just be the best song we’re gonna play all night here on the Squawk [chicken sound]. Might as well just call it a night now, Hawkins. Nah! I’m just messing with you. It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK and, uh, confession time, shh, it’s not even half past four yet, but I’m kind of already on my third chocolate pudding cup. Uh-oh. I’m gonna have a sugar crush before midnight, aren’t I? [crash sound] But there’s no chance we’re slowing down here, the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party is on. So don’t you think about touching that dial. 

AD Break (Hawkins Hardware, Palace Arcade)

Once In A Lifetime - Talking Heads

Obsession - Animotion

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Mindy:

[chicken sound] Oh, Chicken, I know you’re excited, and I am too. It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK. Hawkins, can I just say? That perm is looking great. And yes, you should wear that sequin dress, even if we can’t celebrate properly this year. But don’t worry! I’m here with the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party. Oh, someone give me the applause! [applause sound] And I’m with you every step of the way. Counting down to the new year across Hawkins with records like this. Oh yes, yes, yes, I love this one. 

Crazy, Crazy Nights - KISS

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

Talking In Your Sleep - The Romantics

Mindy:

Oh, we needed that song, didn’t we? What a hit! [punching sound] And I think we should just ignore what’s happening out there in Hawkins, because the party is here on WSQK the Squawk [sound of flare or firework, chicken sound]  I can assure you it’s only hits, no misses and no- wow- [static interference] Hawkins, hold on a sec, let me just reboot this [click sound, static noises] Ugh, it’s the tower again. Oh goodness. This u-u-usually works. [static noises] Aaand, we’re back. Hey, we’ve gotten through worse. I think, maybe. Don’t quote me. The Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party is back on track next. 

AD Break (Rink-o-rama, Scoops Ahoy)

Rebel Yell - Billy Idol 

Maneater - Daryl Hall & John Oates

Hazy Shade of Winter - The Bangles

Mindy:

What? No, noo. One hour down already? I’m having way too much fun. It’s WSQK and this is just the best party in town tonight. You know, no big deal. Maybe the only party in town? But hey, you’re invited. That’s all that matters, right? Consider that your warm up hour, and we’ll be back next with the biggest hits for Hawkins on the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party. But first, we gotta get an update, because, you know, lots going on out there in Hawkins.

AD Break (Hawkin’s Fried Chicken, Bradley’s Big Buy)

UPDATE

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Astronomers from the local observatory have announced that the night sky over Hawkins is expected to look highly unusual this evening. And according to their calculations the phenomenon appears to be visible only from this area. Aren’t we lucky? 

Experts say a rare alignment of atmospheric conditions and distant celestial activity will cause subtle changes of the sky, creating patterns and color shifts not typically seen in this part of the country. Yeah, I don’t know what all that meant either. The sky will just look cool, okay?

This will be a one-in-millenium event, stressing that while it may look strange, it is completely natural. 

Next, this could be the last night of WSQK. That’s the word from several engineers here at the station after a full day of unsuccessful work on the transmission tower. Despite repeated attempts to stabilize the signal, the tower continues to malfunction, causing ongoing interference and unexpected dropouts. The station's management say there’s no immediate plans to shut down, but tonight's broadcast may be cut short if conditions worsen. 

Listeners are being thanked for their patience, and encouraged to stay tuned for as long as the signal holds. 

And finally - congratulations go out to Mr. Townsin (?), who won the annual “Guess How Many Candies Are In The Jar” competition at the Hideaway Bar this evening. Mr. Townsin correctly guessed that there were eight-[static interference]-hundred and eleven candies (811). Prize winnings include the entire jar of candy and a 50 dollar bar tab. Huh, so lame. Last year the prize was free ice cream for a year from Scoops Ahoy. Now that’s a prize. 

The Hideaway reports the competition will return next year.

That’s the latest from what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.  

(62min)

Mindy:

Cheers, Hawkins Update’s guy! It’s 5 O’Clock, I’m Mindy Flare and it’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party [party horn sound]. Consider that first hour your warm up, and now the real party begins all night long. Come on now, let’s hit it, Hawkins.

Beat It - Michael Jackson

Highway To Hell - AC/DC

Mindy:

How are we liking the sound of that, Hawkins? What a tune! You can expect plenty more records like that all the way until midnight here on the Squawk. [chicken sound] And, hey, I think Mr. Chicken liked that one too, right? [chicken sound] It’s Mindy Flare, your queen at the controls. What? Haven’t you heard? It’s our Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party. Come on in, pour yourself a glass, help yourself to some chips and candy [chips bite crunch sound] and yeah, I’ve definitely eaten way too much already. [bite crunch sounds] No matter what’s happening outside these four walls, we have the tunes to drown it all out. So let’s get another huge record on WSQK.

Push It To The Limit - Scarface

Material Girl - Madonna

Owner Of A Lonely Heart - YES

Mindy:

Hawkins, I hope you’re partying with us. It’s WSQK and hi, it’s Mindy Flare with the biggest hits for your New Year’s Eve [party horn sound]. We’re here until midnight, well, at least that’s the plan anyway. The WSQK tower above us, uh umm well, it’s kinda making some weird noises, so we’ll see about that. But don’t go anywhere! I know exactly what you wanna hear. It’s like I’m reading your mind [mysterious space sound effect], and the tune you’re thinking about? I’m gonna play it next. Now go and get yourself a snack or soda, you deserve it. Hah, I’m even controlling you now, too. 

AD Break (Hawkins Community Pool, The Hideaway Bar)

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

This Charming Man - The Smiths

Upside Down - Diana Ross

Mindy:

Let me tell you, Hawkins, we only get songs like that on special occasions, and the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party? That’s a big enough occasion. It’s WSQK, I’m Mindy Flare, and you know the deal: I’m taking over this town with wicked records til midnight-- [signal interference. flickering sounds.] Hey, can you hear us? Hawkins, you still there? Well, the tower’s a huge party pooper, isn’t it? Sounds worse than my pop’s old Pontiac Trans Am when it backfires [car backfiring sound]. One thing’s for sure, this is going to be a New Year we’re all never gonna forget! So crank up those speakers, ladies get your best sequin dress on, and let’s keep partying for as long as we can. And I love this record, I’m playing it for you now on WSQK.

Atomic - Blonde

Kids In America - Kim Wilde

Mindy:

There’s no party like a Squawk party, that’s for sure. It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. And this is how we celebrate our last day… ehmm, of the year. Sorry, (cough) I got something stuck in my throat there. Super weird. And Hawkins, it’s all a little bit crazy out there tonight, I know, but focus on me, okay? Keep your heads in the game, your hearts in music and your arms way up in the air! The Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party is not slowing down, and neither should you! [party horn sound].

AD Break (Hawkins Hardware, Hawkins Video)

99 Red Balloons (99 Luftballons) - Nena

The Magnificent Seven - The Clash

A Kind Of Magic - Queen

Hip To Be Square · Huey Lewis & The News

Mindy:

Yeah, I did just play that song, and I really, really wanna play it again, but I don’t wanna be a mood killer. Let’s keep this party train rolling, shall we? [train horn sound] Well, after another Hawkins Update, cause they don’t stop even on New Year’s Eve. Hawkins, sit tight, I’ve got my finger on the trigger. Don’t worry! It’s just the play button. And I’m ready to fire even more party hits your way [punching sound] until the clock strikes midnight on WSQK. 

AD Break (Hawkins Hunting & Camping, Bradley’s Big Buy)

UPDATE 

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Local authorities have confirmed that there will be increased patrols around town tonight, but are reassuring residents that this is completely routine for New Year’s Eve as Hawkins gets ready to celebrate hard at midnight. I’ve never been happier to be at work and it already sounds like chaos out there. 

Officials say there’s no immediate danger and the patrols are just pre-cautionary. 

Engineers have been working on the WSQK radio tower all day trying to make repairs, but so far there has been no improvement to the audio quality and signal. If anything, things sound worse than before. WSQK has issued a formal apology for tonight’s static and dropouts and are asking Hawkins residents to listen and call in to report any major disruption they hear on air. 

Engineers are hoping - Yeah, because hope fixes everything, doesn’t it? - that the broadcast tower will continue to function until they return tomorrow. 

And finally - Those planning to rent a movie from Hawkins Video today have been met with disappointment as Hawkins Video failed to open this morning, leaving a line of eager customers staring at a locked door. 

According to staff, the mishap was caused by a simple, yet spectacularly unfortunate mistake: the store keys were locked inside overnight by a staff member. 

One angry resident called Scott, who was planning on renting Back To The Future was quoted, saying: “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads, but we still need keys to the store.”

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins from WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(122min)

Mindy:

Let me shout this loud and proud, Hawkins! It’s New Year’s Eve! Whow! It’s six o’clock, which means you have zero excuses now. It’s time to let your hair down and party like you just don’t care. All night long across Hawkins. Why? Well, it’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party, obviously, and I have a record that’ll do just the trick for you now, on WSQK. 

Up Around The Bend - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Mindy:

Hawkins, you could be anywhere tonight, but you’re right here with me on WSQK, and that means you’re winning! [cash register sound]. And Hawkins, the night is young, but you’re looking and sounding absolutely fabulous. I have a feeling tonight’s gonna be one we’ll never ever, ever forget. I’m Mindy Flare, and, hold on. Vance? (in a sing-song voice) Vancy-pants? Hey! Just my little nickname for him, Hawkins. You’re ordering a pizza? Jalapeno? Pineapple? Yes! Ah, the best combo. You know me, Hawkins. I love me some casserole, it almost feels like every single night has been casserole night for me since I’ve started here, so, you know, pizza’s gonna be a really nice change. And while we wait for that to arrive, I’ve hand selected this record for you, Hawkins, on WSQK. 

Fade To Grey - Visage

Pour Some Sugar On Me - Def Leppard

Rasputin - Boney M.

Mindy:

Hawkins, that’s a code red! A code red! No, seriously, I spilled some red wine on the carpet at the studio, whoops. I was dancing and grooving way too hard to that record. I mean this place is basically falling down anyway, right? So, what’s a little bit of wine between friends? It’s your Hawkins party queen, Mindy Flare, on WSQK. And here on the Squawk we’re keeping this party live all the way to midnight. 

AD Break (Rink-o-rama)

Dancing In The Dark - Bruce Springsteen

Don’t Get Me Wrong - Pretenders

Kyrie - Mr. Mister

Mindy:

There’s nowhere else you’d rather be tonight, Hawkins. Especially when we’re spinning records like that on WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound]. And yeah, you could be on your couch, be a little couch-potato and rewatching Back To The Future for the nineteenth time tonight, or you could be locked into us at WSQK where we’ll be Marty McFlying all the way to the midnight with huge Hawkins hits [static interference, lights flickering sound, various static sounds] Oh. That was a big one. The WSQK tower is sounding weird tonight, like it has a mind of its own. But my mission is to keep bringing noise all the way to midnight, with records like this. 

Everybody Have Fun Tonight - Wang Chung

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Living In A Box - Living In A Box

Mindy:

Hawkins, we’re your gateway to great tunes tonight on WSQK, so come on, step right through that gate and come join us for the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party [party horn sound]. I’m Mindy Flare, and I’m not going anywhere just yet. This party is still heating up nicely, and WSQK has your soundtrack all the way to midnight.

AD Break (Starcourt mall, Scoops Ahoy)

Don’t You Want Me - The Human League

I Would Die 4 U - Prince

Tarzan Boy - Baltimora

Mindy:

The energy tonight is off the wall! I’m loving it! You can really feel the buzz and static in the air, can’t you? I mean, that could just be the WSQK tower playing up. Hawkins, the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party has got a new frontman for the next couple of hours, Vance Goodman! He’s got the biggest party hits for Hawkins all queued up. I’m heading to the breakroom, apparently there’s a secret fridge full of chocolate pudding cups? Oohh yeah.

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, Hawkins Video) [interference through the Hawkins Video ad, weird sounds]

UPDATE (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Local law enforcement are asking Hawkins residents to be vigilant this New Year’s Eve. No reason has been given to us here at WSQK, but locals are already speculating that it could be anything from a loose black bear in the woods to a group of unruly teenagers misbehaving around town. Them 80s kids are really testing this town, aren’t they? 

Officials say the situation is under control - which in Hawkins usually means it very much isn’t. 

Residents are encouraged to lock their doors, turn off their porch lights, and please stop calling the radio station saying that you think it’s aliens. It really isn’t. 

A team of engineers have been working on the WSQK radio tower all day today trying to fix the problems with the signal, but they’ve been unsuccessful. If anything they’ve made it worse.

WSQK have issued a formal apology to listeners this evening, as residents should expect to hear more static interference and dropouts all evening. It’ll be a miracle if we make it to midnight, but at least I’ll get to go home early. 

And expect plenty of rockets, shells, black cats, skybombs, and even the odd atom destructor being detonated across Hawkins tonight. They’re just the names of some fireworks, Hawkins, don’t worry. 

Residents are preparing to see the New Year in across Hawkins by lighting up the sky at midnight with a dazzling display of color and sound. Really, of all the years, you’d thought we’d give the fireworks a miss, wouldn’t you? Jeez. 

That’s the latest from what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.  

(182min)

Vance:

Are you ready? Are you read- Are you ready? Hawkins, are you ready? Because this very frequency is where the party is tonight. It’s just after 7PM on WSQK. I’m Vance Goodman, and, uh, Chicken, will you, please, do the honors? [excited chicken sound]. Thank you. This is the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party, and we’re bringing the energy to power us through until midnight. 

R.O.C.K. In The U.S.A. - John Mellencamp

Don’t Go - Yazoo

Paradise City - Guns N’ Roses

Vance:

It’s the biggest night of the year, Hawkins. You already knew that. It’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party [party horn sound] and I hope you’re having as much fun as we are at the WSQK studios. Minus all the, you know, minor technical issues here and there. 

There’s balloons, pizza, Tammy’s producer Allen has already crashed and burned- [interference - deep, lowered down voice, saying something “I see you’ve been looking for me, Nance (? Vance?) We will win.” layered over Vance talking] -well, he didn’t pace himself, did he? So that’s- that’s his own goal. But don’t worry about me, Hawkins, I will not cave in before midnight. I’m here for the long haul. At least 12:12. 

It’s Vance Goodman, and yeah, everything is a bit upside down out there this evening, you might say downside up, even. There’s just that weird feeling, but as usual, Hawkins, you don’t let anything come between you and a good party. So let’s keep the tunes rolling with this one here, on the Squawk. Go ahead, Chicken. [chicken sound]. 

What Have You Done For Me Lately - Janet Jackson

Shout - Tears For Fears

Imagination - Belouis Some

Vance:

We’re delivering for you tonight, Hawkins, nothing but steaming hot party hits all the way until midnight. And let me tell you what else is delivering tonight. That sky! Have you seen it? It almost looks… alive. You know, the colors are just so weird, but also I can’t take my eyes off of it. Yeah, I promise you, I’ve not had too much fruit punch, but, uh, quick, head outside and take a look whilst I line up one of the biggest party hits of all time next on the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party.

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

You Give Love A Bad Name - Bon Jovi

If You Love Somebody Set Them Free - Sting

New Sensation - INXS

Vance:

This is the frequency of all you need New Year’s Eve lunacy, and our New Year’s Eve Party is in full swing here on WSQK [party horn sound]. Hawkins, I hope you’re locked and loaded and ready with rockets, missiles, sky-blasters. At midnight I wanna see you light up the night sky with fireworks. And, uh, do you wanna know something interesting, Hawkins? [slight static interference] I was scared once, too, of midnight, of all the fireworks, but no more! I’ve seen the light. They’re so cool! So, let’s keep this party moving all the way until midnight here on WSQK.

Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ - Michael Jackson

Is There Something I Should Know? - Duran Duran

Vance:

WSQK Party! It’s the Squawk [chicken sound], I’m Vance Goodman, and I know it’s not Dial-A-Dedication tonight, Hawkins, it’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party [disappointed audience sound]. But, Hawkins, do not worry. Dial-A-Dedication will be back all day tomorrow. [applause sound] But this one particular person has been calling in all night and, uh, I think she deserves to be called down, like it’s the prize’s right, so, uh, Cat, (or Kat? Kate? Cate?) Yes, you, Cat. I’ll make an exception just for you. 

You call yourself a Squawk’s biggest fan and I think you’ve more than proven it. You love listening non-stop, like all the time. Like more than me and Mindy do. I don’t know how that's possible, but you do, so, you know, three cheers to you. You’re partying hard tonight in Hawkins, but you said something about hearing strange noises, messages are taking over the airwaves, [chuckles] hahah, just kind of weird, but hey, you know? Uh, put the tinfoil hat down, Cat, it’s just, uh, the WSQK tower playing up. All is well, situation normal, yeah, cool, alright, we got that settled. 

So you can except wall to wall hits for New Year’s Eve here on WSQK and we’ve got your soundtrack all the way until midnight. 

AD Break (Melvald’s General Store, Rink-o-rama) [some slight signal interferences]

It’s The End Of The World - R.E.M.

I Won’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me - Nik Kershaw

Say You Love Me - Fleetwood Mac

Vance:

It’s WSQK where the hits just don’t quit. And I’ll tell you what else doesn’t quit - I mean besides that used Fiero that I got, really good deal, too - The Hawkins Updates. Yep, even on the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party, the Hawkins Update guy is here. Shh, shh, Hawkins, come closer. So, Kylie (Kali??) Coburn, you know, from the Scoop, well, she got some juicy gossip about him. He used to work at the Starcourt Mall and, uh, [knocking on booth glass window] Oh, haha, hey, Hawkins Update Guy. Yeah, yeah, I’m handing it over to you now. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

UPDATE (repeat)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Astronomers from the local observatory have announced that the night sky over Hawkins is expected to look highly unusual this evening. And according to their calculations the phenomenon appears to be visible only from this area. Aren’t we lucky? 

Experts say a rare alignment of atmospheric conditions and distant celestial activity will cause subtle changes of the sky, creating patterns and color shifts not typically seen in this part of the country. Yeah, I don’t know what all that meant either. The sky will just look cool, okay?

This will be a one-in-millenium event, stressing that while it may look strange, it is completely natural. 

Next, this could be the last night of WSQK. That’s the word from several engineers here at the station after a full day of unsuccessful work on the transmission tower. Despite repeated attempts to stabilize the signal, the tower continues to malfunction, causing ongoing interference and unexpected dropouts. The station's management say there’s no immediate plans to shut down, but tonight's broadcast may be cut short if conditions worsen. 

Listeners are being thanked for their patience, and encouraged to stay tuned for as long as the signal holds. 

And finally - congratulations go out to Mr. Townsin (?), who won the annual “Guess How Many Candies Are In The Jar” competition at the Hideaway Bar this evening. Mr. Townsin correctly guessed that there were eight-[static interference]-hundred and eleven candies (811). Prize winnings include the entire jar of candy and a 50 dollar bar tab. Huh, so lame. Last year the prize was free ice cream for a year from Scoops Ahoy. Now that’s a prize. 

The Hideaway reports the competition will return next year.

That’s the latest from what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.  

(242min. halfway through)

Vance:

One, two, three, four [clock chime!] Yeah, four! Four hours to go until midnight, Hawkins. I’m just messing with you, Hawkins, I know how to count. It’s Vance Goodman on WSQK, and, uh, grab a glass and step onto the dancefloor as tonight, Hawkins, we’re hosting the biggest party in town. Turn this one up to - yes - eleven. Really, turn it up to eleven! This is what the eleven was made for! This is why you took a pen and wrote underneath the 10, the number 11. And then turn it to that.

Everything Counts - Depeche Mode

Edge Of Seventeen - Stevie Nicks

Vance:

Sorry, Hawkins. I’m back, I’m back, I’m back. It’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party and [chicken sound], it’s all kicking off here at WSQK. So there’s this guy and a girl that work here. Well, they disappeared out back for a second and when they came back, we were grilling them, trying to find out where they went, you know, get the truth out of them. They wouldn’t tell us anything! Party poopers! At one point the boss even asked them a simple question like, uh, “Who do you work for?” They couldn’t even tell us the truth on that. Uh, they both said, “Scoops Ahoy” [chuckles] We wanted the gossip, but they weren’t giving. Lam-o. 

But, anyway, the party lives on here tonight on WSQK, with hits like this.

Take On Me - a-ha!

White Wedding pt. 1 - Billy Idol

Hold The Line - Toto

Vance:

It’s WSQK, Hawkins, the Squawk is a-rocking on New Year’s Eve. Hawkins, no seriously, we’re getting some pretty crazy vibrations coming off the WSQK tower, and I don’t think it’s anything to do with what I’m doing in the studio. Uh, they’ve been trying to repair it all day, but, yeah, no such luck just yet [static interference, lights flickering sound]. And right on cue, yeah, so we apologize if you hear any static or dropouts in the signal tonight, Hawkins. Back next with some huge party tunes on the Squawk. 

AD Break (Hawking Hunting & Camping)

I Hate Myself From Loving You - Joan Jett & The Blackheart

Killer Queen - Queen

Vance:

This is Vance Goodman right here on WSQK, and wherever you’re tonight - kitchen, garage, or clearing space in the living room- [interference, deep lowered voice over:  “Why’re you   hiding from me, Vance? (?) The Upside Down will never end.”] -- congratulations, you’re officially on the dancefloor. Shoes optional, enthusiasm mandatory. We’re throwing the kinda party the neighbors pretend they were invited to, so, Hawkins, don’t hold back now. This one’s built to be playing nice and loud.

Hey Mickey - Toni Basil

Don’t You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds

Crush On You - The Jets

Vance:

Do you know where you are? Hawkins, obviously. Do you know what I love about a night like this? No one is in a hurry. No one has anywhere to be, especially in Hawkins right now. Like we can be anywhere else. Well, apart from those kids I saw earlier on my way into work - they were in an absolute rush. They looked like they were on a mission to put something right in this town. [car honking sound] It’s WSQK and I’m Vance Goodman at the controls and, Hawkins, we are officially in party mode! Keep it locked right here and don’t you dare to turn it down, I will hunt you down! And drag you back to the dance floor. I’m messing with you, Hawkins.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Hawkins Hardware)

Animal - Def Leppard

I Didn’t Mean To Turn You On - Robert Palmer

Don’t Stop Believin’ - Journey

Vance:

I know, we just knocked it out of the park with that last song. [goal and cheering sounds] Mindy Flare, the party machine, is on the way next [party horn sound]. No, seriously, she’s non-stop dancing for the past two hours and she keeps coming in here between the songs, telling me which songs I should be playing and for some reason I just sort of comply. Haha, It’s crazy! 

Hawkins, don’t move, Mindy Flare continues the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party next.

AD Break (The Hideaway Bar, Hawkins Video) [interference, weird slithering sounds and other slowed down noises]

UPDATE (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Local authorities have confirmed that there will be increased patrols around town tonight, but are reassuring residents that this is completely routine for New Year’s Eve as Hawkins gets ready to celebrate hard at midnight. I’ve never been happier to be at work and it already sounds like chaos out there. 

Officials say there’s no immediate danger and the patrols are just pre-cautionary. 

Engineers have been working on the WSQK radio tower all day trying to make repairs, but so far there has been no improvement to the audio quality and signal. If anything, things sound worse than before. WSQK has issued a formal apology for tonight’s static and dropouts and are asking Hawkins residents to listen and call in to report any major disruption they hear on air. 

Engineers are hoping - Yeah, because hope fixes everything, doesn’t it? - that the broadcast tower will continue to function until they return tomorrow. 

And finally - Those planning to rent a movie from Hawkins Video today have been met with disappointment as Hawkins Video failed to open this morning, leaving a line of eager customers staring at a locked door. 

According to staff, the mishap was caused by a simple, yet spectacularly unfortunate mistake: the store keys were locked inside overnight by a staff member. 

One angry resident called Scott, who was planning on renting Back To The Future was quoted, saying: “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads, but we still need keys to the store.”

That’s the latest on what’s happening in Hawkins from WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.

(302min)

Mindy:

And just like that, Hawkins, it’s nine o’clock on New Year’s Eve! Three hours to go! And this is where the night really starts. Stick with WSQK as we crank the hits and kick this party into overdrive with records like this. 

Angel - Madonna

Crazy Train - Ozzy Osbourne

Mindy: (repeated)

Tonight, Hawkins, we’re partying like it’s our last… day of the year! Well, hey, it is! It’s the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party! [chicken sound] And I’m Mindy Flare [static interference] oh- oh.. just ignore that. Probably just the tower playing up again. But you know, no matter what’s going on out there, Hawkins, we’re gonna keep this party going! So let’s keep this party train rolling! All aboard! [train horn sound] Our next stop - this tubular tune, right here on the Squawk.

Wipe Out - The Surfaris 

I Melt With You - Modern English

It’s My Life - Talk Talk

Mindy: 

Hawkins, that song was so good, if you’d play it loud enough, it’d wake anyone up from a long, long, deep sleep, like really deep [snoring sounds]. Kids, if your parents had gone to bed, don’t try that, okay? It’s not gonna end well for you. 

It’s WSQK the Squawk, I’m Mindy Flare and I’m gonna keep this quick, I think the tower is about to have a moment again [signal interference] and I don’t want this party to end. Don’t touch that dial. 

AD Break (Hawkins Community Pool)

Faith - George Michael

Kids Wanna Rock - Bryan Adams

Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) - Eurythmics

Mindy: 

Some records, they just don’t belong in this world. And that right there, that’s one of them. It’s WSQK on New Year’s Eve, and, Hawkins, quick check-in: you still with us? Whether you’re hosting, or hiding out in the basements, or maybe you’re just hanging out with your pals, we’re right here with ya! All the way to midnight. 

Hard Feelings - Al Kerbey

Once In A Lifetime - Talking Heads

(? song I can’t recognize any lyrics from.. 341min.)

Mindy: (repeated)

Oh, we needed that song, didn’t we? What a hit! [punching sound] And I think we should just ignore what’s happening out there in Hawkins, because the party is here on WSQK the Squawk [sound of flare or firework, chicken sound]  I can assure you it’s only hits, no misses and no- wow- [static interference] Hawkins, hold on a sec, let me just reboot this [click sound, static noises] Ugh, it’s the tower again. Oh goodness. This u-u-usually works. [static noises] Aaand, we’re back. Hey, we’ve gotten through worse. I think, maybe. Don’t quote me. The Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party is back on track next. 

AD Break (Hawkins Video, Enzo’s Restaurant)

Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Tears For Fears

Temptation - New Order

Need You Tonight - INXS

Neutron Dance - The Pointer Sisters

Mindy:  (repeated)

Yeah, I did just play that song, and I really, really wanna play it again, but I don’t wanna be a mood killer. Let’s keep this party train rolling, shall we? [train horn sound] Well, after another Hawkins Update, cause they don’t stop even on New Year’s Eve. Hawkins, sit tight, I’ve got my finger on the trigger. Don’t worry! It’s just the play button. And I’m ready to fire even more party hits your way [punching sound] until the clock strikes midnight on WSQK. 

AD Break (Palace Arcade)

UPDATE  (repeated)

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Local law enforcement are asking Hawkins residents to be vigilant this New Year’s Eve. No reason has been given to us here at WSQK, but locals are already speculating that it could be anything from a loose black bear in the woods to a group of unruly teenagers misbehaving around town. Them 80s kids are really testing this town, aren’t they? 

Officials say the situation is under control - which in Hawkins usually means it very much isn’t. 

Residents are encouraged to lock their doors, turn off their porch lights, and please stop calling the radio station saying that you think it’s aliens. It really isn’t. 

A team of engineers have been working on the WSQK radio tower all day today trying to fix the problems with the signal, but they’ve been unsuccessful. If anything they’ve made it worse.

WSQK have issued a formal apology to listeners this evening, as residents should expect to hear more static interference and dropouts all evening. It’ll be a miracle if we make it to midnight, but at least I’ll get to go home early. 

And expect plenty of rockets, shells, black cats, skybombs, and even the odd atom destructor being detonated across Hawkins tonight. They’re just the names of some fireworks, Hawkins, don’t worry. 

Residents are preparing to see the New Year in across Hawkins by lighting up the sky at midnight with a dazzling display of color and sound. Really, of all the years, you’d thought we’d give the fireworks a miss, wouldn’t you? Jeez. 

That’s the latest from what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.  

(362min)

Mindy: 

If you’re still awake right now - congratulations! You’re officially doing New Year’s Eve just right. It’s 10 o’clock and the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party! [party horn sound] And yeah, the WSQK tower might be doing a little bit of that wobbly thing tonight, but tunes are popping. So let’s keep this party going with this rad tune!

Abracadabra - Steve Miller Band 

Self Control - Laura Branigan

Mindy: (repeated)

[chicken sound] Oh, Chicken, I know you’re excited, and I am too. It’s Mindy Flare on WSQK. Hawkins, can I just say? That perm is looking great. And yes, you should wear that sequin dress, even if we can’t celebrate properly this year. But don’t worry! I’m here with the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party. Oh, someone give me the applause! [applause sound] And I’m with you every step of the way. Counting down to the new year across Hawkins with records like this. Oh yes, yes, yes, I love this one. 

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Superstition - Stevie Wonder

Jack & Diane - John Mellencamp

Mindy:  (repeated)

Hawkins, I hope you’re partying with us. It’s WSQK and hi, it’s Mindy Flare with the biggest hits for your New Year’s Eve [party horn sound]. We’re here until midnight, well, at least that’s the plan anyway. The WSQK tower above us, uh umm well, it’s kinda making some weird noises, so we’ll see about that. But don’t go anywhere! I know exactly what you wanna hear. It’s like I’m reading your mind [mysterious space sound effect], and the tune you’re thinking about? I’m gonna play it next. Now go and get yourself a snack or soda, you deserve it. Hah, I’m even controlling you now, too. 

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, Starcourt Mall)

Kids In America - Kim Wilde

Our Lips Are Sealed - The Go-Go’s

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead Or Alive

Mindy: (repeat)

Let me tell you, Hawkins, we only get songs like that on special occasions, and the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party? That’s a big enough occasion. It’s WSQK, I’m Mindy Flare, and you know the deal: I’m taking over this town with wicked records til midnight-- [signal interference. flickering sounds.] Hey, can you hear us? Hawkins, you still there? Well, the tower’s a huge party pooper, isn’t it? Sounds worse than my pop’s old Pontiac Trans Am when it backfires [car backfiring sound]. One thing’s for sure, this is going to be a New Year we’re all never gonna forget! So crank up those speakers, ladies get your best sequin dress on, and let’s keep partying for as long as we can. And I love this record, I’m playing it for you now on WSQK.

The Sun Always Shines On T.V. - a-ha

Should I Stay Or Should I Go - The Clash

Living On The Ceiling - Blancmange

Mindy: (repeat)

Hawkins, we’re your gateway to great tunes tonight on WSQK, so come on, step right through that gate and come join us for the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party [party horn sound]. I’m Mindy Flare, and I’m not going anywhere just yet. This party is still heating up nicely, and WSQK has your soundtrack all the way to midnight.

AD Break (Hawkins’ Fried Chicken, Melvald’s General Store)

[Your Love Keeps Lifting Me] Higher & Higher - Jackie Wilson

Heat Of The Moment - Asia

Radio Squawk ads for the radio - mixed with signal interference and chiming grandfather clock  (413,4min)

Livin’ On A Prayer - Bon Jovi

Mindy: 

Yes, I will take a bow for that song, and maybe one of these too [applause and party horn sounds]. Hawkins, it’s coming up to 11PM on New Year’s Eve and things are about to get real. Why? Because I’m not flying solo next hour, I’ve got back up joining me in the studio. Vance Goodman is swinging by, and me and Vance, we’re a wicked team! Me, miss Mindy Flare and him, Vance Goodman, yeah, a little bit of a double act. Together we’re gonna team up to take this party into the final stretch on WSQK.

AD Break (Bradley’s Big Buy, signal interference. Hawkins Hardware)

UPDATE (repeated) 

Time now for another Hawkins update, bringing you the latest from right here in Hawkins on New Year’s Eve.

Astronomers from the local observatory have announced that the night sky over Hawkins is expected to look highly unusual this evening. And according to their calculations the phenomenon appears to be visible only from this area. Aren’t we lucky? 

Experts say a rare alignment of atmospheric conditions and distant celestial activity will cause subtle changes of the sky, creating patterns and color shifts not typically seen in this part of the country. Yeah, I don’t know what all that meant either. The sky will just look cool, okay?

This will be a one-in-millenium event, stressing that while it may look strange, it is completely natural. 

Next, this could be the last night of WSQK. That’s the word from several engineers here at the station after a full day of unsuccessful work on the transmission tower. Despite repeated attempts to stabilize the signal, the tower continues to malfunction, causing ongoing interference and unexpected dropouts. The station's management say there’s no immediate plans to shut down, but tonight's broadcast may be cut short if conditions worsen. 

Listeners are being thanked for their patience, and encouraged to stay tuned for as long as the signal holds. 

And finally - congratulations go out to Mr. Townsin (?), who won the annual “Guess How Many Candies Are In The Jar” competition at the Hideaway Bar this evening. Mr. Townsin correctly guessed that there were eight-[static interference]-hundred and eleven candies (811). Prize winnings include the entire jar of candy and a 50 dollar bar tab. Huh, so lame. Last year the prize was free ice cream for a year from Scoops Ahoy. Now that’s a prize. 

The Hideaway reports the competition will return next year.

That’s the latest from what’s happening in Hawkins on WSQK the Squawk. More in an hour.  

(422min)

Vance:

Alright, let’s do this then, Hawkins. It’s Vance Goodman. 

Mindy: 

I’m Mindy Flare. And this is the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party! Whoo! [party horn sound]

Vance:

¿Dónde está el pollo? [chicken sound] Ah, that’s better.

Mindy:

Si, Senor Vance! Hahah, I’m way too excited. This New Year’s Eve it feels kinda special, and I mean, it’s one we’re never going to forget. I am on a sugar rush, though, which, that might explain it. 

Vance:

Hawkins, it’s going to be lively, a little bit chaotic for the next hour, so strap yourself in. Right 

here on WSQK.

Pour Some Sugar On Me - Def Leppard

New Song - Howard Jones

Vance:

[chicken sound] Hello, the Squawk! Hallelujah! It’s the New Year’s Eve Party broadcasting all across Hawkins and it’s Mindy Flare, I’m Vance Goodman with you until midnight. [slight signal interference].

Mindy:

Vance, I think we should let all of Hawkins in on our little secret. We’ve been keeping this for far too long. 

Vance:

Oh, I think it’s time we told Hawkins, too. 

Mindy:

So, we’ve got our own secret handshake and greeting, haven’t we? So, whenever I get to the WSQK studio, I shout “Goodman! Goodman!” if he hears?

Vance: 

Yes, yes, and then I come bursting through the door of the back office and I’m like, “Flare! Flare!” And then we do our, like, trumpet thing, handshake, knucklebump, and then, weirdly, you, uh, stab me in the stomach?

Mindy: 

Yeah. We should probably change that bit, shouldn’t we? [static interference] Um, I’m gonna take this as our cue to get a move on with the hits. The WSQK tower kinda acting up, but hey, at least the music’s still moving. For now. 

Vance:

Yes, Mindy, what a record this is! 

Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar

Heart Of Glass - Blondie 

Holding Out For A Hero - Bonnie Tyler

Mindy: 

[chicken sound] Tonight we’re letting our hair down, Hawkins, and we’re gonna party like it’s our last day on this planet. We’re turning this town upside down on New Year’s Eve. It’s Mindy Flare and Vance Goodman. And yeah, I mean, it’s a little bit weird out there tonight, but hey, crank up the volume on your speakers and it’ll all just disappear [fireworks sounds]. 

Vance:

Oh, hey, who’s-uh, who’s throwing fireworks at the WSQK studio window? It’s like that one was, uh, aimed at you, Mindy Flare. 

Mindy:

Those teenagers, Vance! Hold the fort, I’m gonna go have a word. I might even have a word with their parents. [shouting] Hey, you losers! [door closing sound]

Vance:

Hahah, uh, you know what? She means business. Mindy Flare is a demon. You do not mess with her. Anyway, quick, you? Yeah, you? Please, uh, give me the party sound effect [party horn sound].If you’re listening to your radio right now then- congratulations, you’ve got your invite to the biggest party in all of Hawkins. And, you’re just in time for the main event! It’s not even a paper view (?) You’re getting this cheap as free! Midnight is creeping up on us here, on WSQK.

AD Break (Hawkins’ Fried Chicken, Starcourt Mall)

Close To Me - The Cure

U Got The Look - Prince

Higher Love - Steve Winwood

Vance:

[electric shock sounds]  Ow, oh, haha. 

Mindy:

Oh my god. 

Vance: 

It’s WSQK. That hurt. 

Mindy:

You alright, Vance?

Vance:

I think so. [chuckles in pain] It’s that play button. I swear it’s deadly. It’s giving me shocks all the time, uh, and of course no one’s ever fixed it. 

Mindy: 

Oh, I’ve never had a problem. 

Vance:

Really?

Mindy:

Yeah. 

Vance:

Oh, okay. Well, you do it. You click that button.    

Mindy:

[clicking button sound] Totally fine.

Vance:

[big sigh] Alright, let me hit play on this record then. [static interference, shocks, Vance screams in pain] Auw. Right, that’s it! Mindy, you’re in charge of the desk until midnight. Thank you. 

Mindy:

Okay, but look what your suffering has done, it’s got this incredible record playing on WSQK. 

Vance: 

Can’t argue with that.

Working For The Weekend - Loverboy

Rockin’ Robin - Michael Jackson

Vance: 

That right there - that is the tune of the night here on WSQK. I’m calling it, Mindy. It’s WSQK and, uh, quick, sneaking in the back as you’re just in time for the Squawk’s New Year’s Eve Party. 

Mindy:

Vancy-pants, I’ve just realized - we’ve not practiced our countdown to midnight together, and, um, it’s kinda on the way next.

Vance:

Yeah, Mindy, we’re professional. We’ve got this. It’s not like we’ve been doing this for like six weeks, or anything. Oh, I’ve got an idea. Leave it with me.

Mindy: 

I don’t like that look in your eyes. Hawkins,  [big static interference], --you know, the static is pretty bad tonight, and our signal keeps dropping out. The WSQK broadcast tower - it's in a little bit of rough shape. Listen, there’s not a tonne we could do to fix that right now. We’re just hoping it’ll hang in there until New Year’s Day. 

But countdown to the New Year’s next on the Squawk [chicken sound].

AD Break (Scoops Ahoy, -interference, weird sounds, monster sounds??., Hawkins Hunting & Camping, Bradley’s Big Buy - more interference.)

Don’t You Want Me - The Human League

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham!

Upside Down - Diana Ross

Vance:

Yes, M-to the-I-to the-N-D-Y. And may I say: that was an inspired choice. 

Mindy:

Oh, you know me, Vance. I love, love, love Diana Ross, so I just had to play it as the last song before the New Year. Hawkins, it’s WSQK the Squawk [chicken sound echoing].

Vance:

Haha, I think Chicken has had a few too many there. Put that wine bottle down, you’re gonna hurt someone. [glass shattering sound]. Chicken! 

Mindy:

What a silly-billy. [punching noises in the background]. So while Vance Goodman loses a fight with Chicken [chicken sound], another year is just on the horizon in our crazy and slightly strange town. I mean, why would you wanna live anywhere else? [slight flickering interference sounds] Hawkins, we’re moments away from midnight. [more static interference]. I’m not sure we’re even gonna make it to the new year, the WSQK tower is in rough shape. Almost as bad as that guy’s face I once saw serving down at Scoops Ahoy [clinking sound]. Boy, he got smacked silly. 

Vance:

Mindy, the- the time. Uh, maybe that’s a story for later, yeah? It’s nearly time to count down.

Mindy:

Oh. 

Vance:

Oh, also, I had this awesome idea to do something wild and different. No other radio station would have thought to do this: how about we count down from [flickering sounds] eleven.   

Mindy:

Alright, alright, alright. Let’s just do it quickly. Otherwise we might not get to bring in the new year at all. Where’s that other DJ? That girl? I thought she might have been here. [static]

Vance:

No, no, no time, Mindy. Let’s do this together, the two of us, okay? One last time. In- In this particular year, obviously. Here we go, Hawkins. 

Mindy & Vance:

[chiming clock sounds] Eleven, Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, [more static interference] Five, Four, Three, Two, One. 

[static. chime of grandfather clock. End of broadcast.]

001 - WSQK The Squawk, ʎɐᗡ ʇsɐ⅂ ǝuO

(file has 23 hours. - so as of now I only wrote down the first two minutes to connect it with previous day)

[Stranger Things clock chiming sound effect - same as in 4x9 when the rifts/gates met in front of the Hawkins Public Library]

[static, white noise. thunderstorm sound] 

Vance:

Hawkins, do you copy? Over. [more static] Can you hear us, Hawkins?

Is the WSQK still transmitting? That darn tower! [more static and other sounds] We have no power. Let me push these buttons here. Reboot that. Give that old machine a bit of a [hitting sound]  smack there. [beeping and powering up sounds] 

Vance:

Wow, that actually worked. Yeah, we’re back. And it looks like all the important stuff is working? Let me just check the, uh, [chicken sound]. Haha, yup. Look alive, Chicken. [chuckles] What just happened to the WSKQ tower? Man, that thing must be fried [static noise]. Something went pop up there, for sure, I mean, but the good news is, of course, if- if we just, you know, fall down hard and can’t get back up, at least you can pull and bobbin tom (?) a little bit better, once we’re out of the way. 

One final test, though. Will the tunes work on back up power? Otherwise, uh, it’s just you and me, Hawkins, and no one wants that. Wish me luck.

[starts playing]:

It’s The Final Countdown - Europe

Vance: