#wrumine

Like for example just in that one moment (4th gif down) in ep13 - he gently pushes Fight’s arm down from where it was framing him against the window, while he’s looking at Fight like that

you know the look

I can’t find it in a search but it’s this look

right before this moment:

listen there is this thing that fighter loves its pushing tutor until he drops the mask of good boy and he literally does that by literally pushing him against walls i like to think that in the early stages fighter just got so madly attracted to the duality of tutor he would sit with hwa hwa and tutor and listen to them talking and tutor be all heart eyes and nice and talking with hwa hwa about cupcakes and rainbows and he would just sit there and be like wth how are you real i know you can be also really unruled so what is this why are you being like this is it because you love hwa hwa?? and how can i get to see that tutor that throw me the killing look while being all obedient and doing what i asked for and accepting the wrong name tag from me while biting back only with one glance?? how can i get to see that tutor?? And then he notices that THAT tutor the mad tutor the powerful tutor the one that snaps back and puts him into place that one never appears with the others NEVER he is all smiles and being gentle and fighter loses his mind because he wants to see that sheer power that energy so instinctly he started to pushing literally into his personal space noticing that glitch in tutors eyes noticing the crack in the mask so he continued and got nearer and nearer until he pushed him against walls just to see the raw energy of tutor finally appear to see those eyes that no one else sees the ones meant only for fighter alone fast forward and you get the trophy husband of @graveformydarling canon he just loves that hurricane of energy and dominance that is tutor and he loves to think he is the one that made that side of tutor thrive because he gave him the space to explore it

 So I just feel I need to respond to this because it speaks to me, a lot. @saintsnack has a gift of reading these two so damn well. And I’m really fascinated by the duality both Tutor and Fighter have and this meta just emphasizes it.

From the beginning, the first day, Fight was fascinated with Tutor’s fire. Those smiles of his we see in the flashback in ep12 was Fight falling for Tutor’s attitude as well as his looks. ( @graveformydarling​ puts it so well here). Fight kept pushing and pushing Tor because he wanted that energy directed at him. And the two times we see Fight push Tor until Tor snaps (ep5 and ep6)—those are such captivating moments not only because we see both of their raw emotions, we see Fight getting what he’s subconsciously wanted for so long and both fearing and loving it. The vulnerability hits you hard. Zee really captured Fight’s vulnerability beautifully and that’s a big part of why I love Fight as a character.

And here  @katishideout spells out that Fight purposefully pushes Tor to show that dominant side, and then it’s Tor who decides what Tor wants, and Fight wants Tor to decide for him. (beautifully described by @zaintseeme​  here, with A+ additions by graveformydarling and @flower-of-the-desert​) I just love how their relationship so naturally leads to this give and take between them, but it’s not just the dynamic itself I love it’s how Fight was the instigator. These two are vers (and arguable switches, but that’s another conversation and one I’m aware not everyone is on board with, which is okay!) who have a clear exchange of power every time we see them be intimate (another great discussion of that by graveformydarling here), and that’s why many of us feel we’re intruding on something intimate—we’re meant to feel how personal and heavy with emotion their interactions are! Not just that their attraction is real but that the emotions fueling that attraction are real.

@the-wayside​ described it beautifully here, that Fight is the shy, quiet one and Tor is the confident, fiery one who easily speaks his mind. And this means that Fight had to just keep pushing Tor in a non-verbal way (using “teasing” as a poorly constructed front) until he pushed Tor to confront what Tor felt for Fight. That’s why the dialogue in ep6 is so important—Fight is daring Tutor to show his feelings for Fight by putting up the teasing front again, but making it about Tor’s actions. Fight wants Tor to be the instigator this time, so Fight doesn’t have to say outright what he’s feeling (something that is consistently hard for him).

Fight’s dialogue in that ep6 scene: “If you think I actually like you, then prove it, Tor. Prove it to me, what kind of person I am. Do you dare?”

*they kiss for a fucking long time*

Fighter: “Don’t forget to ask yourself, how do you feel about me?”

I mean honestly looking at that dialogue alone, Fight was confessing his feelings in the most indirect way possible, making Tor do the legwork (but with his mouth…) then he thought back to Tor asking him directly if he likes men, bringing his fear of confessing his feelings to the forefront again (because if he’d stuck around after that heated kiss, he would’ve had to say something to Tor, wouldn’t he?), and that’s what made him back off and run away. And then we see Tor get angry after Fight has left, snapping out at no one, “Who says I want to kiss you?!” Tor is angry because he just did exactly that! He let Fight provoke him into showing his desire for him, and he’s pissed Fight backed off after that instead of sticking around to confess he wasn’t just teasing Tor.

This exchange is just a wonderful example of how Fight’s non-verbal way of dealing with his emotions pushed Tor to show his dominant side, which in turn allowed Fight to be vulnerable towards Tor. Fight wanted Tor to drop the mask and show what he was really feeling, because he recognizes Tor has a mask, but so does Fight—it just is expressed differently than Tor’s. The scene after their rooftop kiss, the beginning of ep8, shows the beginning of Fight letting go and giving in to Tor, even though they’re not officially in a relationship yet. They both feel so strongly toward each other, but are still unsure, and Fight is making himself vulnerable just by inviting Tor to the beach.

So when Tor switches it up and his dominant side comes out with that Adam’s apple kiss, and telling Fight that’s all he can have for now, the rest is for the beach, Fight is probably over the goddamn moon. Now that they’ve confessed their feelings, it’s Tor gaining the upper hand and telling Fight what to do, which is what Fight has wanted but can’t even voice it. They just fall into this dynamic which shows just how well-suited they are. Fight has been holding back for so long that he falls right into a sub role, being told what to do, because he’s been unsure of what Tor feels for so long, unsure of what he is allowed to feel, that Tor taking control even for those few minutes feels like heaven for him.

Every single of their love scenes culminates in Tor telling Fight what to do, and pushing Fight into whatever way Tor wants him. So Fight began with pushing Tor up against walls because he saw that dominant side from the beginning—even if he didn’t recognize it for what it was, he recognized what it made him feel. And Fight decided he wouldn’t let Tor go, he’d stick around and tease him and tease him and end up dating Tor’s best friend (canon tells us the dad is actually dating Hwa’s mom before Fight dated Hwa so isn’t that convenient). But dating Hwa is for his dad, not for him, so eventually that front starts to crack, to the point Tor is worried Fight is messing with his best friend’s feelings, leading Tor to purposefully provoke Fight for the first time. And from there Fight really is a goner. Because as soon as Fight knew Tor could turn that dominant energy back on him on purpose, he was hooked.

For their second wedding anniversary, Tutor gifts Fighter a necklace. He purposefully purchases one that is metal--silver specifically, thin, that can be worn under clothes. But it’s heavy – Tutor wants Fight to notice the weight, wants his husband to never forget he’s wearing it. It’s the closest they’ve gotten to a collar, but Tutor wanted something Fight could show off—sometimes.

Tutor remembered how Fight would look at the necklace he’d gifted Tutor so long ago, with both possessiveness and longing, and had known for a long time the earring Tutor had given him and the rings they had exchanged were not enough, for either of them. He also knew Fight was reserved at best when they weren’t alone, but also how much he wanted to show off the fact he had Tor as his husband. Extravagant gifts to Tor were one of them. So now it was Tor’s turn to be extravagant. It was a fascinating war of interests Tor saw take place sometimes in his husband’s eyes, expressions, demeanor. So the necklace for Fight was a step in the direction Tor felt they both wanted.

Fight never wears it at their shared workplace, only at home, on their dates, or when he’s wearing a suit for work and it’s hidden. Tutor doesn’t usually know when Fighter has that necklace on while they’re both working at the office, but he has a lot of fun guessing by Fight’s demeanor and then finding out if he was right at the end of the work day. He only keeps score to himself for a few weeks, but he knows Fighter knows this is a game they’re both playing.

The first time Tor guesses wrong, he blames the work. It was a ten hour day that turned into thirteen and he’d barely seen Fight after their all-too-brief lunch together. As soon as they had sat down to eat, Fight unbuttoned one button on his shirt and loosened his tie, and Tor’s first impulse was to guess Fight wasn’t wearing it. When their lunch ended, Fight fixed his single loose button, giving Tor’s lips a teasing peck rather than a real kiss (not unlike him), and left Tor to his work. Tor had had so much on his mind as he’d returned to work, he forgot to consider the matter further until he drove home by himself that evening, and it occurred to him he hadn’t seen Fighter once all afternoon.

When he gets home, Fight is cooking a late dinner for him—Tor had texted ahead to tell him he was finally leaving work—and wearing gym shorts, a muscle shirt, and—the necklace.

Tutor comes up behind his husband to hug him around the waist, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to his neck, right over the silver metal warmed by Fighter’s skin. Fighter’s hands falter in their work chopping vegetables, and go completely still when Tutor’s kisses move up Fight’s neck to suck Fight’s ‘T’ earring into his mouth and gently nip the soft skin.

“You wore it, didn’t you?” Tor whispers in Fight’s ear, his hands grasping Fight’s hips even harder as he pulls Fight flush against him.

“Hmmm,” is Fight’s only response as he sinks into Tutor’s embrace.

 -

He finally confesses to Fight, after his second glass of wine that night, sitting across from Fight on the couch, that he’d been guessing correctly for weeks now. Fight laughs and tells Tor he can stop guessing when he’ll wear it and just tell him when he wants him to wear the necklace or not.

Tor hooks a finger under the necklace, just above Fight’s collarbone, and pulls Fight closer to him, until their noses are almost touching. Fight’s hands are now braced on either side of him, his breath hitching, but he doesn’t touch Tor. He knows to wait for permission.

“I know why you wear it, P’Fight,” Tor says, watching Fight’s eyes become glassy and soft, staring at Tor’s lips.

“It’s when you miss me more, isn’t it?” Tor asks gently, his gaze drifting down to Fight’s slightly parted lips.

Fight’s eyes glance down, his “Hmm” of response almost too soft.

That’s why he’d worn it today. Fight had barely seen him for almost fourteen hours besides their barely twenty minute lunch. At noon.

Tor’s fingers drifted from Fight’s collarbone up the side of his neck, feather light. Fight’s face moves almost imperceptibly closer, and Tor’s other hand moves to the back of Fight’s neck, fingers carding through his hair.

-

Okay, @graveformydarling kindly said I could muse at her about how Tutor could find out Fighter is an Omega so here I go! (Disclaimer: I only have the crash course education on ABO, so forgive me for mistakes/assumptions I make about this universe, I’m a rookie)

Part of me really loves the “stupid way”, as the anon put it, of Tor just finding the suppressants carelessly left out by Fight (a la the condoms moment in ep9) but also I can’t picture Fight being that careless with something he still doesn’t want Tor to know, so this makes me think, does Fight do something careless or does he purposefully decide to just… not take his suppressants for a day to satisfy his curiosity about what he thinks he’s feeling for Tor?

Because like, what you said in your first ABO ficlet here Mel got me thinking: “Fighter never experienced a full heat, never had his senses trained on the particular scent of an alpha, much less  learned the difference between regular alphas and those that were a perfect match for you. He had been living pretty much as a beta all his life, blissfully unaware.”

Plus what the anon was saying about Tor feeling something around Fight but he doesn’t know what it is. So my big question is, can an Alpha feel that an Omega is the perfect match for them even if that Omega is on suppressants—but they can’t identify that feeling, they just know there’s something?

So what I think would be interesting is if Fight knows that some Alphas and Omegas are a perfect match for each other, but he has never experienced any attraction to an Alpha as an Omega because of the suppressants, and part of him is just dying to know what that would feel like with Tor, now that he knows Tor is an Alpha.

What if Fight took just half the dose of a suppressant for a day? Idk how suppressants are seen to work in this verse, but if a half-dose has some effect but not the full effect, Fight might be tempted to try that. And it’s the day that Fight protects Tor from the creditor in the rain. (Or, another possibility because I remember how damn forgetful I was taking meds as a college student—still am forgetful—Fight could just forget to refill his prescription and only have half a dose left or NOTHING left and he just risks it because he’s been studying with Tor for weeks and what’s the worst that could happen lolololol)

But this brings up another question—I feel like going off suppressants is a lot like going off certain types of meds (birth control, SSRIs—which I’ve taken and gone off both) and you can tell that you’ve been off suppressants even for just one day (this is definitely true for some SSRIs). Fight has to have forgotten a dose at least once before meeting Tor, I mean he’s only human. So he thinks he’ll be okay, just a bit on edge, like has happened before. But usually being off them for one day isn’t enough for Alphas to notice? Maybe? Shoot me down if I’m wrong.