#whorephobia

You may be a “temporarily useful” one, a token, the reason harm comes to others like you; but you will never truly be “one of the good ones” to them.

You are as much every sex worker, every addict, every unhoused person in their eyes, as you are queer. Your rights and your liberation only extend as far as those you leave behind, much like how Black folks learn that no amount of money can save them from a cop that wants them dead.

In 15th century Venice, the city had a problem. Not only were there so many dang sex workers, not only were so many Venetian men fucking other men, but a lot of the sex workers who had vaginas were dressing up as men to have sex with men!

So how did Venice deal with this “problem”? Well, on March 15th of 1480, they banned a hairstyle popularly associated with these FTM-crossdressing sex workers from being worn by people classed as women. The punishment for those who broke this law was excommunication, a fine, and public shaming. Sex workers who wore this hairstyle in particular were whipped, had their heads forcibly shaved, and held in prison until they could pay the fine.

From Venice: A Documentary History 1450 - 1630 by David Chambers and Brian Pullan:

From the Latin. Decree of the Council of Ten, 15 March 1480: The coiffure [ habitus capitis ] which Venetian women have recently taken to wearing could not be more indecent in the sight of God and men, since by means of this coiffure women conceal their sex and strive to please men by pretending to be men, which is a form of sodomy; and therefore : Be it determined that by the authority of this Council the Heads of the Ten Heads or at least two of them shall go to our Lord Patriarch and persuade him, by means of the confessors and also through an edict to be published in all the parishes, to prohibit the hairstyle [ gestamen capillorum ] which women adopt, and which they call a ‘mushroom’ [ fungus], and which hides the forehead; and to order the hair to be drawn and tied back behind the head, and the forehead and face to be made free of it, that they may be seen to be women, just as God made them, and as was their custom before the present corrupted age: all this upon pain of excommunication. Once this commandment has been published in the churches, be it resolved, so that it may also be obeyed through the fear of temporal penalties, that if any woman is seen wearing this indecent coiffure and hairstyle, her husband shall be compelled by the Heads of this Council to pay a fine of 100 ducats, which shall be given to the accuser, and both the husband and wife shall be immediately proclaimed upon the steps, as many times as may be necessary, as fearing neither God nor our own laws. If the woman concerned is unmarried, then her father or brother or any other person in whose power she lies shall be punished as well as herself. ‘The enforcement of this decree shall be entrusted to the Heads and Inquisitors of this Council, or to another Council, upon their oath. The Lords of the Night and the Heads of the Sestieri shall be instructed that, once these edicts have been published, all whores found wearing this arrangement [ sixam ] of hair shall first be whipped and then have their whole heads shaved. Having been so shorn, they shall be led to the steps and there proclaimed, and their accuser shall have 25 lire from the goods of each woman, and after being whipped, shorn and proclaimed they shall not be released from prison until they have paid over this money.

*"FTM" here is being used as an umbrella term for people seen as female presenting/acting in ways seen as masculine/male.

It's not just "putting off what you could've/should've done yesterday indefinitely" but more importantly, "failing to protect and listen to some of the most marginalized people in your communities and now its biting you directly in the ass"

I can't say it's surprising but even currently not being a sex worker, I'm frustrated seeing people who did nothing when sex workers were talking about it getting up in arms over things just because they now affect them specifically. Getting involved is a good thing, doing something is a good thing but good grief.

Warning: This post shares harassment mentioning CSA.

I only share a tiny fraction of the harassment I receive for being trans and a sex worker on this website, but I do want to talk a little bit about the way that whorephobia and transphobia like this can limit people's choices and make us hide ourselves away. Particularly when this bigotry intersects with us becoming parents.

The accusation being laid out here is that I'm somehow endangering my unborn child by mentioning being pregnant and posting a picture of my own pregnant body. That even acknowledging my pregnancy and daring to post a picture of it, whilst complaining about the ways I am fetishized, is equivalent to allowing pedophiles to sexually abuse my kid. It's vile to read and it's vile to talk about, and it's also rhetoric that sex workers have thrown at us the second we have children.

This user is essentially fantasizing about the idea of other people wanting to sexually abuse my baby, frothing at the mouth with their hopes that my kid will be taken from me before they're even born. They're not actually taking steps to make that happen, but instead trying to intimidate sex workers into silence. No report was made to any authorities (that's why they vaguely say "local" because they haven't bothered to try and find out where I roughly live) and no message was sent to my book distributor (because it's a crowdfunded project where I act as the distributor myself). The purpose is intimidation.

Those who are anti-sex worker, whether they're conservatives who view us as sinful or they're SWERFs who see us as reinforcing the patriarchy by existing, want nothing more than for activists and advocates to be quiet. Since a lot of sex workers are parents, one of the most effective ways to force that silence is to threaten our kids. They argue that being a sex worker means we must be exposing our kids to sexual content or selling access to them, that simply mentioning that we have kids or are pregnant poses a threat, and they leverage this to argue we're all unfit parents.

Many sex workers sell sex so that we can provide for our children, to give them all the resources and stability they need so that they can grow up safe and happy and do whatever they want with their lives once they reach adulthood. Sex workers are also disproportionately likely to have been sexually abused ourselves, making many of us far more protective than average and extra cautious about who we let near our children or what we share about them.

If we're scared our kids will be taken away because of whorephobic assumptions that being sex workers means we're allowing predators access to them, we're less likely to seek support when we're struggling. If we're accessing services to support single parents, we're less likely to mention being a sex worker and get support related to that. If we're accessing services to support sex workers, we're less likely to mention having a child. We're pressured into hiding and that cuts us off from community support when we need it.

During this pregnancy, my health has declined and because I lost the additional job I had alongside sex work I was stuck selling sex much later into pregnancy than I wanted. I was terrified of having to find someone to babysit my newborn and go back to hooking within weeks of giving birth, as my body was still recovering, because I had no financial safety net and no right to parental leave. It is only because I was open about being a sex worker and being pregnant that I was able to seek support from my community and crowdfund to give myself 8 weeks of parental leave and afford to stop selling sex in my last couple of months of pregnancy too. If I'd been too afraid to admit to both at the same time, I'd be selling sex right up to my due date and immediately after giving birth. A horrific outcome for me and one that would absolutely not benefit my baby.

I'm not going to be sharing any identifying info about my child online, on accounts where I do sex worker advocacy or otherwise. I recommend this policy to anyone who has a following online, not as advice specific to sex workers, because children deserve privacy and should be protected from potential predators. What I will not do is cease talking about parenthood as a sex worker, regardless of what harassment I face, because it's an important reality to acknowledge and I want more sex workers to feel seen and understood.

well you came to the right inbox i love to read and ill kick any nest

oh this is a good read and i recommend ppl sub to the substack if youre able

i like especially this part here

i feel like a lot of tirfs here on tumblr do this trick often those at least who believe truly they are revolutionary and who insist there are/can be good men who support them but that it is so very rare because doing so is often at their expense and to gives no benefit to them

a lot of people insistent on the irredeemable nature of men do seem to fall for this lie of the patriarchy that men can only be benefited by the systems that subjugate others that they will only be politically decent in order to be good allies or that supporting women is at great sacrifice ignoring the fact that the patriarchy harms men too that seeing others suffering is itself an indignity on yourself when you are asked to sit and do nothing about it

licherally tho

to that id say i dont think gender separatism is automatically expressly or directly transphobic ofc but i do absolutely think theres something to be said about how separatism does innately act as if there are two groups to separate and as a result trans and intersex people (especially nonbinary trans people) will always be caught in the middle even when theyre "included" because male and female men and woman have never and will never be two distinct fully inextricable categories and trans* and intersex people are fully the overlapping sections that get torn to shreds in political gender separatism

and i was talking to my roommate abt it and she says it's to deal w trafficking but i don't see how it does. she also said that the majority of sex workers are trafficking victims and that the workers for whom it's just a job are a minority? is that true?

Hi, and thank you so much for your question!

This form of "legalized sex work" is known as the Nordic model and is actually not what sex workers want or advocate for! Sex workers push for decriminalization! Let's go over what the differences are!

The Nordic model: "[aka] The Entrapment Model refers to the theory that criminalizing clients and third parties (e.g., managers) will reduce demand in the sex trade, thereby “freeing” sex workers, who are often seen as victims. This framework has vocal proponents among certain prohibitionist feminists, but its impact has been devastating where it has been implemented. Unambiguous data shows a clear correlation between laws that criminalize clients and an increase in violence against sex workers, sexually transmitted infections (STIs), and exploitation within the sex trade. While the Entrapment Model may seem enticing in theory, it’s impossible to create a safe environment for sex workers and their clients when one side of the transaction is criminalized." (source: https://decriminalizesex.work/why-decriminalization/#:~:text=The%20Entrapment%20Model%20refers,the%20transaction%20is%20criminalized. )

What can legalized sex work look like in practice?

"Mandatory registration with the government as a sex worker

Licensing requirements for sex work establishments and sex workers

Restrictions on the number of sex work establishments allowed

Discriminatory zoning and location restrictions dictating where sex workers can work, excluding areas such as residential zones, and areas near schools and businesses

Mandatory HIV and STI testing and treatment in government health facilities

Restrictions on advertising These regulations undermine sex workers’ human rights by restricting where sex workers can live and work, violating their privacy and bodily autonomy, and placing extra burdens on them which do not apply to other workers. In this way, legalisation does not treat sex work as a form of work like any other, but as a special form of work that needs to be heavily controlled and monitored by the state."

(souce: https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/guide_to_legal_models_english_prf04.pdf )

Why should we decriminalize sex work instead?

"Decriminalizing sex work means that consenting adults who buy or sell sex are not committing a crime. With the decriminalization of prostitution, there would, of course, still be laws against trafficking, rape, violence, and sex work involving minors."

(source: https://decriminalizesex.work/why-decriminalization/ )

Now as far as the overlap between the number of sex workers and trafficking victims, it's important we know these terms are not interchangeable, and also why someone might be both a victim of human trafficking and choose to be a sex worker. Definition of a sex worker:

"Sex workers include female, male, trans and gender diverse adults, and young people (over 18 years of age) who receive money or goods in exchange for sexual services, either regularly or occasionally."

Definition of human trafficking:

"Trafficking means the recruitment, transportation, transfer, harbouring or receipt of persons, by means of the threat or use of force or other forms of coercion, of abduction, of fraud, of deception, of the abuse of power or of a position of vulnerability or the giving or receiving of payments or benefits to achieve the consent of a person having control over another person, for the purpose of exploitation."

(source: https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/terminology_guide_english_prf03.pdf )

Sex workers participate in selling of consensual sexual services, while victims of human trafficking are being abused. This being said, some people who have experienced human trafficking do choose to become sex workers for many reasons, but even if their reason is linked to their past, consensual work does not equal abuse. There is no real way to know the exact number of overlap between these two groups of people, as collecting accurate data on either group is difficult to begin with, not to mention the conflation of the two muddies the waters further.

If you'd like more reading/resources on this here are more links:

https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/en_challenging_the_nordic_model.pdf

https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/guide_to_legal_models_english_prf04.pdf

https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/10-reasons-decriminalize-sex-work-20150410_0.pdf

https://www.nswp.org/sites/default/files/terminology_guide_english_prf03.pdf