continued fromĀ HEREĀ // @whimbentā
on a hitched breath, madeline nodded as she tried to mentally prepare for the conversation she knew was coming. perhaps it was stupid of her to maintain a relationship with shonnetta when she was well aware that they both had different end goals but the blonde had fallen so deeply in love with her, she couldnāt stay away. she couldnāt deny herself of one of the most loving and healthy relationships she had ever been in. maybe they had each hoped the other would change their mind or theyād find some sort of compromise. unfortunately for the pair, their relationship had ultimately led here.Ā āi ⦠know,ā she mumbles, barely able to meet her partnerās eyes.Ā āi wonāt stand in the way of your happiness,ā somehow, she musters up the courage to look at shonnetta, taking her hand in her own, āyou deserve to be so insanely happy ⦠and it kills me that i canātāā she pauses as tears well in her eyes.Ā āyou are going to be such a good mom.ā
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā itāsĀ alwaysĀ been shonnettaās dream to be a mother. ever since she was a teenager , sheāsĀ always pictured herself settling down to have a baby .. or two. if her job werenāt so dangerous , sheād even consider being a single mom but she doesnāt want her children to become orphaned if something ever happens to her.Ā Ā āĀ i wish i could just say that iāll raise the baby on my own and you donāt have to be a part of their life , but that wouldnāt be fair to either of you.Ā āĀ Ā itās not realistic either , regardless of whether she chooses to adopt or undergo ivf. once she actually has a child , her entire world will revolve around them and thereās no way to avoid that. it wouldnāt feel right dating someone who refused to be a part of their family .. someone who would inadvertently make her child feelĀ unwanted.Ā Ā āĀ i guess thatās it then ,Ā āĀ she mumbles , still refusing to look up from her lap.Ā madeline is the only person whoās everĀ reallyĀ made her feel loved and itās difficult to give that up , even though she knows that itās the right thing to do.Ā sheās already tried convincing herself that she doesnāt need a baby to be happy with her life , and it just made her feel empty inside.Ā