Just dropping by to let you know I was thinking about Stupid Games the other day and it brought me more serotonin than I've had in a week, thank you and bless you for bringing that story into the world, no matter how long it takes you to update or even if you don't end up finishing. It's still out there making people happy!!
Such a nice thing to say and definitely something that I needed ā¤ļø
I had this really dumb idea in my head about wanting to finish two requests first (which I still havenāt quite finished and one of them is getting close to 12k in words now š ) before posting the next chapter and then I got a bit busy with the Vikings Big Bang and now here we are. I will say that the next chapter will definitely go up in the next couple weeks so stay tuned!
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Husband, one night stand, best friend: Sihtric Elflaedsson, Ubbabe, and the King Ivar we all headcanoned after season 4 (Feed You the Sky Ivar)
Oh my God how dare you send me the hardest, most impossible ask I have ever received in my life? I am totally going to cheat and maybe make this the jumping off point for an actual fic?
On my wedding night to Ubbe, Ivar claims his right to sleep with the bride and that makes him my one night stand.
And then on a raid to England where we happen to meet Uhtred and Co and they're fighting with the Danes this time, we all meet Sihtric and Ubbe and I begin a poly relationship with him.
But an answer where I follow the rules is Sihtric for my husband, Ivar for the one night stand, and Ubbe for my best friend.
I know you have Amos headcanons, please lay some of the most mundane ones on us
I love mundane headcanons! Here we go:
He keeps up semi-regular correspondence with Anna. She sends him books that he rarely reads.
He set up a hydroponic rig for Alex to plant some herbs and veggies for cooking. Alex isnāt a very good gardener, though, so Amos fixes things behind his back.
Amos and Naomi are the card-sharks on the Roci and are forbidden from playing on the same team any time the crew plays a team card game.
Oh shit did I just spend my entire lunch break diving deep into your blog? Yes, yes I did. I love your tags and I hope you aren't bothered by my un-timely comments on old posts. Also do you have a masterlist? That might be what I was originally looking for before I became sucked in by everything else you find cool on this hellsite (excellent reblog selections!)
I love when people do deep dives on my blog!! Iām glad that you enjoyed my selection of birds/Expanse/random thoughts.
I do have a fic masterlist that is (mostly) up to date! My AO3 is campitor. I hope you enjoy!! I absolutely love everything youāve written for The Expanse!
Welcome to the new season of Nassau's Most Eligible Bachelorette!!! You are sure to find love among these six suitors! The contestants are: Charles Vane, Edward Teach, Jack Rackham, Anne Bonny, De Groot, and Max. Tell us who you eliminate each week, and why. Did they screw up a challenge? Read you all wrong? Cause drama in the house and piss you off?? And of course, who makes it to the end and sweeps you off your feet? Inquiring minds want to know!!
1. Max is the first to go. Sheās brilliant, sheās tough as nails, sheās stunningly beautiful, and sheās ridiculously competent, but with her so busy running Nassau and me always at sea, we would simply never get to spend any time together. Iām not saying I wouldnāt happily have a fling with her, though we would make sure we both know thatās all it is, to preserve the friendship and avoid hurt feelings.
2. Edward Teach is out next. Yes, the man is a legend and he can still fight, but he wants me to stay ashore and be wife number ten or something. And he doesnāt properly appreciate Jackās snark. What kind of person isnāt utterly charmed by Jackās snark? I could have overlooked him having a sword fight with his adopted son in the fucking kitchen when all I wanted was to have my fucking morning coffee in peace without two giant hairy men knocking over the coffee pot while trying to stab each other, but the Jack thing is just too much. I hope it wonāt be too awkward having him as my father-in-law.
3. DeGroot. Thereās no spark, but I appreciate his skills and his brain. Plus, he told both Edward and Charles that their ideas were repectively āfucking terribleā and āthe second stupidest thing Iāve heard all week, after whatever Flintās was talking aboutā and neither of them even tried to attack him, so now heās basically my curmudgeonly big brother. AND he taught me how to curse people out in Dutch. We have a standing platonic date where we talk shit about the idiotic things our captains want from us and geek out about navigation whenever weāre both in town.
4. I donāt have any spark with Jack Rackham either, but he is the king of shit talk and I enjoy the hell out of his company. Plus heās a package deal with Anne. Itās ridiculously endearing how proud he is of her destructive abilities, and how he just wants her to be happy, so how can anyone not love the guy. He is just great.
5. Anne Bonny was hard. Anne is everything, though sometimes she makes me look like Iāve got my PTSD under control. It was nearly impossible to not choose her. Weāve both got trust issues, but somehow that makes it easier to relate to her. Jack is gracious enough to make sure I donāt feel like a third wheel when heās around, but they have such a long history together that I donāt want to risk becoming a point of contention for them. But that was a difficult choice and I didnāt shut that door all the way.
6. Which leaves me with Charles Vane. Talk about spark. But if goes deeper than that. He doesnāt want me to diminish myself or stop sailing to go be the little woman back in port. That we both have zero desire for the domestic life is a huge part of what makes us compatible. He doesnāt talk my ear off, and he always does exactly what he says heāll do. And he wasnāt even surprised when he found me working the speed bag one night when I couldnāt sleep; he just asked to work in. Then we drank rum on the roof. Also, he replaced the coffee pot that got broken while he and Teach were fighting without ever mentioning it. Heās hard to read sometimes and Iām sure our tempers will flare on occasion, but I couldnāt ask for anyone more reliable.
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Because my brain is Like That, I dashed off another version of the first meeting of our disaster pirates, this time from Hopeās perspective.
As always, bigger-than-life appreciation for @whenimaunicorn. Her incredible The Heart of Admiration series thus far can be found here.
Word count: 1679
Warnings: None
Hope Wickham pauses outside the tavern. She is not fully convinced that sheāll be able to save the lives of her crewmates. For that matter, she is not entirely certain sheāll leave this meeting with her own life, but she has to try. To her shock, her crew elected her quartermaster, a position to which she had most certainly not nominated herself, and now itās her duty to protect them as best she can.
When she asked her old friend DeGroot to set up an urgent meeting with the captain of the Ranger, the man had made a wry face. āReady to move on from Fisher, are you? Find work with a captain who has true technical sailing skill?ā She shrugged noncommittally, not wanting to let on her real purpose but not willing to lie to him. DeGroot, she knew from her apprenticeship, is not one to give compliments easily or falsely. āTrue technical sailing skillā is as ringing an endorsement as anyone could ask for.
āWhat manner of man is Captain Vane?ā
DeGroot looked thoughtful. āIām sure youāve heard his reputation as a brute and a brawler, and itās well-deserved, but he keeps his word. Sailed with Teach for years. Respects skill. Deals fairly with those who deal fairly with him. You wouldnāt be the only woman on his crew.ā
He returned shortly after with the message to meet Vane at the tavern, as soon as she could get there. And so there was nothing for it but to trust DeGrootās assessment of the man, square her shoulders, and try to make an entrance to remember.
Years on the account had taught Hope that dealing with other pirates as a small-boned woman requires a certain amount of swaggering bravado. She flings open the tavern door, cocks one hip out, and stands there for a moment, silhouetted, as she scans the room for a man matching the description DeGroot had given her. Ah, there he is, watching her approach his table in an alcove at the rear of the room. She feels an unexpected jolt in her stomach as she locks eyes with him, but this wouldnāt be the first time sheās had to ignore her nerves, would it.
"Captain Vane?"
He nods, and she continues. "I'm quartermaster of the Starling. I believe you're expecting me." She removes the pistol and long knife from her belt and places them on the table in front of him, a sign that she has come in peace.
He gestures for her to sit across from him and signals the barmaid to bring her a drink then gives her a hard look from beneath his brow. "What's this about?" He could sand the deck with his voice, she thinks, but it isnāt unpleasant to the ear.
"A certain item of yours has come into my possession. I'm here to return it to you." She hands him a burlap sack containing his black. She had been appalled when a couple of the more rambunctious members of her crew came back to camp having stolen it from the Ranger. It wouldn't do for them, new to Nassau, to start their time here by making an enemy of the most notoriously violent captain on the island.
Vane looks inside the sack to examine his colors. Hope had ensured it wasnāt damaged, and she had folded it carefully. When he comes to that conclusion as well, he turns that heavy gaze back to her. "What do they call you, quartermaster of the Starling?"
She meets his piercing stare with her own, unflinching. "They probably call me a lot of things when I can't hear them." She is sure she sees him suppress a smile at that. So the man has a sense of humor beneath that steely demeanor. Good. She holds out her hand for a shake. "Hope Wickham."
"Why did your captain send you, Miss Wickham, instead of approaching me himself?"
She frowns, but doesn't rise to the bait. "He didn't send me," she says coolly. "He has no idea any of this happened. I'm meeting with you of my own accord and in my own capacity to try to protect my crew."
Vaneās silence as he sips his ale has a pointed quality to it. Heās waiting for her to elaborate.
"I may be new to Nassau, but I'm by no means new to the account. Captain Fisher and the rest of the crew are used to doing things a certain way, and don't yet understand that Nassau has rather different understandings of acceptable behavior for those under the black than does Tortuga. On Tortuga, this would be seen as a prank by a new crew seeking to position itself and a score easily settled without much bloodshed. Unlike them, I know that is not the way of things here."
Vane narrows his eyes. "How do you know how we do things here?"
"I apprenticed with Mr. DeGroot. We stay in touch." The corners of her mouth turn up in a wry smile, unable to contain her amusement at the absurdity of the situation. "I realize that he is nobody's first, second, or tenth choice for a tutor in etiquette, but," she gestures broadly, "we live in a world of wonders."
Sheās gratified to see Vane smiling back at her, ever so slightly. It changes his entire face, and she can almost imagine that they are having a friendly drink together. "So you're a trained navigator, then?"
"I am."
He also seems to remember that this is not a social call. The smile drops from his face, which returns to its forbidding scowl, and he hunches forward enough to give the impression of looming over her without getting up. For a moment she wonders if heās going to lunge across the table and attack her. "Members of your crew snuck onto my ship, stole my black, and they did it so badly that someone saw them getting away. So let me tell you what happens next."
Hope has learned to never, ever show fear when facing down a man, so she doesn't quail from his ferocious growl, from his coiled posture that makes him appear to be a predator about to pounce. Only long practice allows her to meet his icy glare directly. "Who saw them?"
"My quartermaster and his matelotage." Is he taken aback by the question? Heās clearly a man used to being obeyed. Yet he answered her...
She tilts her head, considering. "Anyone else?"
Vane grunts and leans back in his chair. "No."
Hope nods to herself. "Can you trust their discretion?"
"With my life." She sees him follow the course sheās plotted with her questions. "You're going to ask who else on my crew knows it was gone."
She shrugs as if to say you caught me. "Well, who else does?"
"Only them." She opens her mouth to speak but he cuts her off. "Regardless, you know I cannot let your crew's insult go unanswered. Iāve a reputation to maintain, a captaincy I do not intend to lose."
"Nor do I expect you to. However, by returning your black undamaged, along with compensation for the," she pauses and bites her lip, considering her next words, "inconvenience you've been put through by this unfortunate breach of propriety, I trust this need not be a killing offense." She takes a bulging coin purse from her coat pocket and pushes it across the table to him.
Vane opens it and quirks a scarred brow at the amount of coin within. "Is this from the Starling's collective savings?"
"No. It's my personal share from our last prize." It had been a lucky take, that last prize, larger than most of the Starlingās, but thereās no reason to tell Vane that.
He places both hands on the table and leans forward abruptly. Hope feels her eyes widen as she assesses the threat and she quickly schools her expression. Vaneās voice drops to a near-whisper that puts her in mind of a catās purr. "My turn to ask the questions. Who else knows that your crew had my black?"
She leans forward as well, close enough to take in details of the trinkets braided into his long hair. "As far as I know, nobody." She keeps her voice as low as his, matter-of-fact. "My crew hasn't bragged, because they didn't get a chance to parade your colors on the beach. I made certain of that. And they won't now, not after I've relieved them of it. The ones who took your black are young and foolish. I've revoked their shore privileges for the time being, until they can show they wonāt be shitheads to other crews if they come into town." Oh, they hadn't liked it at all, being returned to the Starling to assist the carpenters with some much-needed repairs to the ship while their brothers celebrated the take in Nassau, but they stopped complaining when Hope explained in a reasonable tone that the alternative was approaching Vane themselves to return his black. Or perhaps they wished for Vane to seek them out?
Vaneās expression turns pensive for a moment as he mulls over what she told him. "They know you're returning it to me?"
Hope forces herself to continue to meet that intense blue stare. "Yes. If they don't like it, they can elect a new quartermaster. However, they agreed when I explained my reasoning as to why keeping it would not be in their best interests."
"And DeGroot. Does he know why you asked him to arrange a meeting?"
"He didn't ask. I didn't tell." She lets out a laugh at the memory of DeGrootās dismayed yet proud expression when he thought she was going to work for his captainās foremost rival. āI let him think I'm here to ask you for a job, just to irritate him."
A long moment passes as she watches Vane weigh his options. Has she convinced him?
He pushes the purse back across the table to Hope. "Keep it. Buy the next round and we'll call it square."
