Dating Sim AU (like the expired verse one where Roo makes a dating sim from the perspective of Lucifer that’s also kind of a hell-building sim) but it’s also Alastor Holiday…
You have to get both Jevil AND Spamton’s approval to even “court” Alastor once you befriend his shadow to start his route. The two former secret bosses sort of act as the player’s shoulder devil and angel, suggesting ways for the player to “woo” Alastor that may or may not work. Either way, they will be blaming the player when something they suggested makes Alastor upset.
It had been a tumultuous few days in Hell, not that He’ll was ever untumultous, anyway…
A new game had hit the market, compatible with most VoxTec systems and even the few remaining independent consoles and televisions hell had to offer. The infamous Hazbin Hotel’s own television seemed to miraculously gain a feature for gaming. Including an appropriate amount of Odd Controller’s with ugly pink and yellow buttons. But they worked. And now the Hotel had a vast variety of new games! Super Smashing Fighters, The Legend of Tenna, Mantle (the Sword Route game where you fight ERAM for the Shadow Mantle), and all of the Dragon Blazers games!
Not that anyone besides Alastor seemed to recognize any of those titles. Speaking of the Radio Demon, in an uncharacteristic showing of excitement, Alastor had been herding all of the to play video games.
Today, however, was the first day Lucifer came to join them. Alastor had long since disappeared to prepare the hotel resident’s lunch. Charlie was messing with her controller, occasionally having to take a break at the frustrating Quizzes in The Legend of Tenna that seemed to have no way of finding the right answer!
“Seriously, who is Kris?” She groaned, before perking up when she saw her father. The controller went flying from her hands as she bounded towards him and he towards her. Vaggie was left scrambling to catch the thing before it hit the ground.
“Char Char! How are you this… mmmmorning?” He asked, wheezing when Charlie squeezed him like his so beloved ducks.
Angel Dust and Cherri bomb, previously watching Charlie get stuck on Board 2 of the game, promptly went back to doom scrolling on Angel’s phone from where they were curled up on one of the couches.
Charlie smiled with gentle fondness. “It’s afternoon, Dad.”
Lucifer nodded, some agreement coming out of his mouth. Charlie scrambled to try and find and excuse for him to stay longer and not go pester Alastor when he was trying to cook. The last time she’d tried to distract him at all Jevil had summoned a carousel out of nowhere and sent her careening into the stairs. And no one seemed interested in listening to her insist she had an actual reason!
She did not want to see how Alastor’s 3 little gremlins would respond to someone who liked to antagonize Alastor on PURPOSE.
“So, I was thinking you could help me with this puzzle I can’t seem to get the hang of, hahaha…” Charlie feigned helplessness, batting her eyes at her dad and wringing her hands together. Like clockwork, Lucifer grinned and puffed his chest out, strutting towards the gaming system like it was a runway.
“Lead the way, Char Char! Your old man is great at puzzles!”
Lucifer was pretty sure he was looking at a pixel depiction of The Garden of Eden and not a Zelda-styled video game.
Not wanting to look back at Charlie like he was an idiot, he followed the prompt given to him to select an “Angel Name”, along with a warning that it wouldn’t be permanent.
“Uh, sir,” Vaggapalooza started, getting shushed by one of Lucifer’s spare hands coming out of a portal.
“I have got this handled, girls, don’t worry about it!”
“Dad, are you sure you don’t want to take a break? You look—“
He waved a hand in her direction, trying to laugh it off. This game was almost eerie in the depiction of falling from Heaven, the descriptions accurate in a way that made his still unruly feathers shudder in remembrance of holy flames.
Lucifer could feel that his face had more eyes than human-shaped things were supposed to. He could feel Angel and Cherri perk up and rush to see what could have rattled Lucifer so thoroughly.
The King had been sitting in one spot playing a single video game for 36 hours and Alastor was getting fed up of Charlie morosely trying to encourage the man to move.
He thought the manic little angel shared his views on how mind numbing television was! Sure, Alastor himself got a bit carried away in getting back into shape concerning his Smashing Fighter’s prowess, but none of that distracted him from important things!
What was worse was the fact that now half of his thralls were similarly entranced to the damn thing.
Spamton had been first, with the argument that things that [IDENTITY THEFT IS NOT A JOKE, JIM] him were important enough to get distracted by. Jevil had joined if only to revel in the fact the King barely responded to the small Jester’s pestering now. And Niffty seemed oddly invested in peeking into what the man was doing as well. Of course, the darling still had the sense to focus on her job, but..
“Lucifer,” Alastor started, aware of the way his voice crackled with static. Jevil cackled and tackled Alastor’s midsection, sensing the reckoning the monarch was about to endure. The Jevilstail curled around his waist, comfortable and familiar. He picked Spamton up by the scruff and raised an eyebrow at him. The mailman dropped into the Dealmaker and Niffty giggled as she scuttered back to her roach-killing.
The king mechanically pressed buttons and the control. Alastor sighed, spinning his cane around and covering it enough magical-frost for it to burn on impact.
And then, using the technique Dess taught him proper way of swinging a bat, he whacked Lucifer over the head.
In his distraction, it seemed the King was actually taken off guard by the hit.
Alastor stared at his cane and then back at Lucifer. “Are you stupid?” He asked the man bluntly, stepping over the couch with ease. He brought down the cane by Lucifer’s face and relished in the pained squeak it gave him.
The man’s face had turned somehow paler and the impossibly orange. What?
Lucifer had to enlist Niffty’s help in sneaking video game time. Now everyone knew to get either Charlie or Alastor to restrict Lucifer’s time on the TV.
“I don’t get it, Whiskers. His version of Hell is somehow WORSE than like, any of the playthroughs I’ve seen!” Angel mused, halfway lying on the bar’s counter, squinting as he tried to lip read the conversation Charlie and Lucifer were having by the television.
Alastor let out a static filled snicker. It echoed twice in voices not his own.
Ooh hoo hoo! Lucifer, Spamton and Niffty got really invested in the Dating Sim! Niffty is gonna make so much fanart~
If we take inspiration from the Viewers!AU too, what if ☝︎✌︎💧︎❄︎☜︎☼︎ dropped a copy of 'Deltarune' and they ended up playing the game as 'Kris' and...