#venenatis

Etiam venenatis erat vel viverra iaculis. Nulla euismod mi non convallis tempus. Aliquam lorem erat, pellentesque vitae urna ac, suscipit volutpat tellus. Aenean pretium maximus justo a scelerisque. Donec dapibus magna enim, non posuere odio feugiat a.

Because it's Sunday. :) Tagged by the lovely and quite fairy pokemon-esque venenatis.

Rule One: always post the rules

Rule Two: answer the questions the person who tagged you asked and write 11 new ones

Rule Three: tag 11 people and link them to the post

Rule Four: actually tell them you tagged them

1) What’s your favourite animal and why?

It's a cross between sheep, bunnies and horses. Not a literal cross. I like sheep because they can be quite daft but they're ADORABLE. I love bunnies because they're adorable (and they make me cry jfc). And horses are majestic and beautiful.  

2) Do you play or watch a sport? Which one?

I don't really do either. I like to watch football/soccer, especially during world cup because it makes me feel alive lol. I almost got tickets to a Chelsea match a few days ago, but shit is expensive. :( I also was about to get World Cup tickets, but shit. is. expensiveeee.

3) What’s one thing you must absolutely do or accomplish before you die?

Publish my book(s)! And pay for someone else's education. Not my kid's, though. That's too predictable ffs.

4) What do you feel is your strongest talent?

I'm a good writer, I think. I've become a really good writer because I don't have any other talents lol.

5) Do you have any regrets?

NO. Never. Because life right now is pretty amazing. :)

6) What would someone have to do to get in your pants?

Not much. LOL first thing that popped into my head tbh, but really, not much. I am not a complicated person. Perhaps my standards are too high, but you know what, y o l o.

7) Tell me about a fandom you’re in. How did you become a part of it? Who is your favourite character?

I feel like I'm getting too tired for fandoms haha. So much energy! The only fandom I am actively in would prob be 1D. And I don't know how I got into it, probs inception. And I am in a one-sided, sometimes manic and soul-lurching infatuation with Harry Styles.

8) What’s your favourite fashion trend right now?

THOSE BOOTS! Seen a lot of girls wearing those chelsea boots and I want a pair so badly!! But then I dislike shopping, so that kinda sucks. I'm gonna set aside a week to find a comfortable pair. :)

9) Free concert ticket - tonight only! Who are you going to see and why?

I've just been calling Oslo in Hackney to try and weasel my way into the Years and Years gig on Wednesday. SO DESPERATE. They were like 'sorry what gig? you know that's sold out, right?' WELP. Anyway. If it's a free ticket and if it's a last-minute thing, then either Years and Years (I neeeeeed to go to that show) or The 1975, as I'm planning on seeing them soon anyway. I would see Years and Years (who you should listen to) because the lead singer's voice does stuff to me. I would see The 1975 because I am never going to quit them, no.

10) Your internet is down for the next 3 days. What do you do??? (a.k.a. What other hobbies do you have?)

Hahahahahahaaaaa. Last time my internet was down, I just slept. My only other hobbies are writing and exercise and video games. I'm taking up card reading again, but I can't be bothered with doing anything when my internet isn't working. Nothing is really contingent upon my internet working, but it always takes precedence, I don't know how.

11) How do we know each other?

I met you when I was really, really young. We were forced to go to these weird functions together and ever since then, you've legit just never left. Even now, when I'm on the other side of the world, you're still here. It's bizarre. Hopefully you'll be able to gtfo soon, because this is getting ridiculous. <3

Tagging (this is completely arbitrary as I'm literally just scrolling quickly through my follows list, but if you wish to answer the questions, then please do!):

shereeshugah, antichrist-styles, memystuffandthings, amazingdemon, shiruvia, lemmmons, thismakesmetearbend, alwaysbethewest, emotion, louisreedus, jadedskys

Questions:

1. If you could go anywhere in the world tomorrow and cost wasn't an issue, where would you go?

2. What's one hobby you've always wanted to take up?

3. If you could listen to one song until you die, what would it be?

4. What is the most (or semi-most) embarrassing memory you have of your childhood?

5. What are two foods you love together but everyone else would think was wack as hell?

6. What size shoes do you wear?

7. Do you save what you like most about a meal for last or do you eat it first?

8. What do you want to be when you grow up?

9. What's the weirdest dream you've ever had?

10. What is your favourite scent?

Like most humans I know, I spend a lot of time in business that’s not mine. The people I don’t know’s business, my friends’ business, Mother Nature’s business.

As a recovering control freak, there are three things I know for sure about trying to control things:

1. We try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t.

In other words, control is rooted in fear.

2. Control is also a result of being attached to a specific outcome—an outcome we’re sure is best for us, as if we always know what’s best.

When we trust that we’re okay no matter what circumstances come our way, we don’t need to micro-manage the universe. We let go. And we open ourselves to all sorts of wonderful possibilities that aren’t there when we’re attached to one “right” path.

3. The energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control.

I suspect it’s slightly different for everyone, but here’s what ‘control mode’ looks and feels like for me:  My vision gets very narrow and focused, my breath is shallow, adrenaline is pumping and my heart rate increases.

My mind shifts from topic to topic and from past to future very quickly, and I have little concentration, poor memory, and almost no present-moment awareness.

In surrender mode, I’m calm, peaceful. Breathing deeply, present in the moment. I see clearly and my vision extends out around me, allowing me to (literally) see the bigger picture.

So the great irony is that attempting to control things actually feels less in control. When I’m micro-managing and obsessing over details, I know I’m in my own way.

The Art of Surrender

Surrender literally means to stop fighting. Stop fighting with yourself. Stop fighting the universe and the natural flow of things. Stop resisting and pushing against reality.

Surrender = Complete acceptance of what is + Faith that all is well, even without my input.

It’s not about inaction. It’s about taking action from that that place of surrender energy.

If letting go of control and surrendering not only feel better, but actually produce better results, how do we do that?

Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go—consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy.

For example, when I become aware that I’m in control mode, I imagine that I’m in a small canoe paddling upstream, against the current. It’s hard. It’s a fight. That’s what control mode feels like to me.

When I choose to let go and surrender, I visualize the boat turning around, me dropping the oars, and floating downstream.

I’m being gently pulled, no effort necessary on my part. Simply breathing and saying, “Let go of the oars” is usually enough to get me there.

Sometimes it’s a little harder to make the shift from control to surrender. Here are a few questions that can help:

1. What am I afraid will happen if I let go of control?

When you pinpoint the fear, question its validity. Ask yourself, Is it true? If you’re afraid the night will be ruined if your boyfriend doesn’t remember to pick up eggplant (and you’ve already reminded him 14 times), question that assumption.

Can you really know the night would be ruined without the eggplant? And if it would be ruined (by your definition, anyway), what’s so bad about that?

2. Find out whose business you’re in.

Your business is the realm of things that you can directly influence. Are you there? Or are you in someone else’s business? When we’re trying to control things outside of our own business, it’s not going to go well.

3. Consider this: Would letting go feel like freedom?

It almost always would. Let that feeling of freedom guide you toward loosening your grip.

A Friendly Universe

Einstein said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

I believe in a friendly universe.

Being receptive and allowing things to happen is a skill that can be practiced and improved upon. It helps to believe in a friendly universe—one that is supporting you at every turn so that you don’t have to worry yourself over the details.

We can always choose to do things the easy way or the hard way. We can muscle through, or we can let go of the oars and let the current carry us downstream.

There is a peaceful, yet focused energy that accompanies holding the intention of what I want, but not forcing myself to do it. That energy is magic. I’m still a work in progress, but I’m allowing it to become a habit instead of making it a habit.

Namaste,