Vida de la Virgo: Life Update #2
Hola Besties!
Checking in for another weekly report! (So far, so good on consistency) Before I start, I wanted to give some pointers on how to read these post are meant to be read on the blog. If you're reading from the tumblr mobile app, you're good to go!👍. (But you are missing out on the best part of this blog, the jukebox!! I recommend that you visit habichuelascondolce.blog for the full experience. Actually, I'm begging. Please don't let the jukebox go to waste. I spent hours coding and I put a lot of love and effort into my playlists🥺). And, if you're reading from the domain on your mobile/desktop browser (thank you 💋), just click the title (the big words in the fancy font up top) and it'll direct you to the post link!
Anyhoo, we got things to talk about! Starting with this week's Honorable Mentions:
This baby praying mantis I saw at my front door step. (so smol🥹)
I saw the Hidden Inventory/ Premature Death movie in theaters with one of my amiguitas. I really wish they released it as a movie first, then as a series rather than the other way around. But it's whatever, anything to see my beloveds again. [I may or may not have cried during the photo montage at the end. Yes, I know they're just lines on a piece of paper and I don't CARE. My Shaylas😭]
Another one of my amiguitas co-hosted a BYOB (Bring Your Own Book) Club at her place and it was giving third-space! There was reading, coloring, and bombbb snacks. I brought my laptop and worked on the blog! It was so grounding and productive, and I'm absolutely obsessed with the idea. Can't wait for the next one!
Publicly cussed someone out for the first time! And it was a man!!! He was being super rude and then started yelling!!!! at!!! my!!! MOTHER!!! Unfortunately, I had no other choice but to call this man out his name because, he must have mistakenly lost his damn mind. My tactic to cussing people out is not immediately jumping to name calling (that's child's play). I don't even take it straight to hell, I take it straight to therapy and self reflection. You see, the nature of someone's behavior and choices can tell you a lot about who they are and how their life is going. Given that he decided to pick a fight with a woman at 9AM on a beautiful Saturday morning, I informed him on the fact that he is a "miserable b*tch". I also kindly advised that he should "shut the f*ck up". [Because, being that heated so earlier in morning is crazyyy.] He took my advice 🥰.
I got so much hair love this weekend! For context, I'm back to being ginger after sporting my natural brunette for 3 years. [That was not by choice. I would be ginger all the time but, I don't have ginger maintenance money all the time.] I'm starting to think that ginger is my actual natural hair color because, life becomes 10x better when I'm in my "ginger era". Someone even asked me if it was my natural hair color (I guess wearing your curls out can easily to hide your grown-out roots). The best compliment was a from two ladies yelling across the street to let me know that they love my hair! One of them thanked me for "making natural hair look good".🤭 Guess I have no choice but to keep this ginger until I the day I dye. [Typing that out made me physically ill but, I can't let a good pun go to waste. I actually can't help myself, I must write the corny dad joke or I'll die.]
Okay! Now, let's get in to the meat and potatoes of this week:
As far as how the new job is going, let's just say I need to lock in ASAP and start getting this commission because this base pay is NAWT it. Honestly, I was contemplating quitting within the first week because it wasn't meeting my standards. However, I realized soon enough that it all depended on me to reach those standards. I do have the chance to make really good money, but that's only if I willing to grind for it. (I'm not, but, these bills need to get paid 😪) This is my first ever performance-based role, and it's lit a whole new fire in me. I'm more hungrier for growth and improvement than ever before, and I'm genuinely grateful for how this job has pushed me in a short time! [I'm still actively job searching though; my taste is way too expensive for this tax bracket]
Over the weekend, I helped out another amiguita for a pop-up fashion event she co-hosted in the city! I've worked with her a couple times before, so I was feeling a lot more comfortable,confident, and super happy to be there. I ended up having such an amazinggg time ansI met so many incredible and interesting individuals. I even got to do some modeling for some of the brands! The best part was that all these wonderful experiences and opportunities came to be because I decided to get the f*ck over myself and force myself to put myself out there no matter the cost or response.
I used to be so awkward at these events because I felt so unworthy of being in those spaces. I didn't believe I had anything interesting to add to the conversation, so I never went out of my way to make one, and I honestly felt myself slipping down that slope again. But, this time I defeated my awkwardness by releasing the shame and fear that usually tags along with it. In my case, being awkward isn't the actual problem. It's my fear of looking awkward that's scaring the h*es. [Sidenote: Ironically, being scared of looking awkward just made me look even more awkward]
Instead of letting my awkwardness dictate over my conversations, I used it as an icebreaker! If I felt myself fumbling small talk (which I typically do), I'd pause briefly to collect my thoughts, and recovered the conversation by simply being transparent: "Please forgive me, I'm a bit awkward but, I'm trying to get over it to make more connections!" and just like that (*Carrie Bradshawl voice*), I kept the conversation going. And it actually worked! People really appreciate honesty way more than we give them credit for. Even more so, we're in a time where making new connection feels like a humiliation ritual, so being a little nervous talking to new people is completely relatable. Showing the tiniest crumb of vulnerability can really help cut the tension and make the conversation feel more human. [Sidenote: If that doesn't work, oh well! 🤷🏽♀️ Who would want to be friends with those judgy tight-asses anyway?]
I like to remind myself that, at the end of the day, we're all the same. Just a bunch of walking, talking bags of bones with lots of thoughts and feelings. I’m not the first awkward person to exist, and I know for certain I won’t be the last, so why make it a big deal? Life has and will continue to go on so, I might as well enjoy my time here and not let anyone kill my vibe, not even myself. Keeping that in mind always helps me quiet the voices a little. [Sidenote: I'm talking about those self-loathing-inner-critic type of voices, not the schizophrenic type of voices...eh, might be a little schizophrenic.]
Luckily for me, every person I met welcomed me into the community with kindness, patience, and grace. For the first time in a long time, it felt okay to be me, all of me. Even with the parts of me that I’m still struggling to understand and embrace. That's the one of beauties of finding and building a community. They serve as a reminder that you are worthy of being seen, welcomed, and accepted, even when you're still learning to see that worthiness within yourself. [Sidenote: Literally boohoo sobbing while typing this y'all, omg]
Weekly Words of Wisdom: It's not about the cards you've been dealt, it's how you play the game. Play to win.
And with that, it's time to close this off with the fit and fur friend of the week!
Fit of the week goes to Sunday:
Deets: Shirt: Payasoposer - Payasa #2 tank (Bought @ TUMBAO ) Shorts: Uniqlo - Denim Work Shorts Shoes: CRUDA - MONTERO Bag: MM6 - Mesh Triangle Tote in Chartreuse (Bought on Vestiare Collective) Dirt stain on bag - Downtown M Train
And our fur friend of the Week goes to Togo, who has a very important message to share! 🏆
Thanks for tuning in. Lo checamos el proximo! xx
♍︎
Note: Also, if all 2 of you who read this could let me know how you like this format? Any feedback on how to move forward in the future would be welcomed and greatly appreciated! K thx bye!
