Firstly, as far as I know, it is COMMON KNOWLEDGE that vampires are not repelled by garlic BULBS, and even more common knowledge that the majority of the public DO NOT KNOW THIS. Hence, vampires are not only encouraged but EXPECTED to pretend that the non-flowering parts of garlic are equally harmful to us.

Secondly, I’m actually just allergic to garlic. There. Go on, laugh.

I can’t believe it. We need to do better as a community.

EDITOR NOTE:

Stereotypes

First things first. Vampire stereotypes. Vampires DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT sparkle in the sunlight. They burn and crumble horribly and painfully. DO NOT try to push your vampire colleague, acquaintance, friend, or lover into the sunlight to see them glitter. Odds are they will retreat to the nearest shady spot, make their way home, then return that night to rip your head off. They consider being pushed into the sun a serious offense.

Secondly, vampires ARE NOT homicidal maniacs bent on draining the world dry or turning all humans into vampires. If you treat a vampire like this, they will get offended. And depending on which vampire you offend, reactions vary from manslaughter to cussing you out.

Vampires, like humans, have varying personalities and traits. Some live regular lives while other prefer life with a clan. Some embrace their vampiric strength and abilities and work as mercenaries and assassins. Some live as shut-ins. Some are happy, cheerful people while others are sadistic and scheming.

Abilities

Older vampires tend to be much more powerful than younger vampires as they have had longer to hone their abilities. All vampires have different strengths, but they all have generalized traits that come from their rebirth. These include:

Superhuman strength, speed, and senses

Night vision

Natural stealth (soundless footsteps and a lack of natural scent)

Sharp canines that can change at will

Encanto (The ability to hypnotize or erase the memory of a human)

Super healing

Immortality (unless staked, burned, decapitated, or their heart is cut out and burned)

Vampirism (It’s technically a virus)

Feeding

All vampires have to drink blood to sustain themselves. No one really knows why the virus chose that blood to be its sustenance, but unfortunately that’s the way it is.

Older vampires only need to feed once or twice a month, compared to fledglings who need to feed anywhere between once a day to once a week. This may be because older vampires can also eat and drink human food, which new vampires must train themselves to be able to stomach. 

A vampire does not need to drain a body to satisfy their hunger. A pint or so of blood will do the trick. Only the vampires that truly love death will fully drain a body. These types of vampires will be excluded from clans and sanctuaries as they are a threat to the secrecy of the race. Often if these types of vampires get out of control several of their own race or other supernatural races will team up to bring them down.

It also does not have to be human blood. Animal blood also works, but satisfies the hunger for a shorter period of time.

Disadvantages of Being a Vampire

Being undead comes with its drawbacks, most of them related to religion. They are listed below.

A vampire cannot set foot on holy or sacred ground

A vampire cannot touch items of their religion. (ex. Crosses or Stars of David)

Vampires are burned by holy water and sunlight

A vampire on fire will burn to death in seconds.

Vampires get sleepy during the day, but some train themselves to remain awake and alert

Mal hatte ich auch rote Haare…

Um ganz ehrlich zu sein, kommt mir dieser Look heutzutage ein wenig stereotypisch vor. Trotzdem sieht das Ensemble unvergleichbar besser aus als die ganzen Korsette und Korsagen, die die Möchtegern-Vampire alle tragen.

“Uh, does it have to be vampire related or can it be like me personally?” Paul asked. “Cuz, I swear if I gotta hear about garlic one more time, I’m gonna sit out in public one night and eat as much as I can, before I puke. Oh, that and I don’t have sex with every pussy I see, okay. Enough said.”

Marko was about to lose the shot of Tequila he had just downed or tried to, just as Paul had his outburst. He held the back of his hand over his mouth and leaned forward as if the tiny shot glass would take back the liquor on it’s own. Then he swallowed. “That’s some funny ass’d shit right there. I know I’d have bets going. How much garlic can the dumb ass eat? But uh, I dunno. It’s either too much monster or not enough. That’s what gets me.”

“A vampire stereotype huh?” Dwayne thought about it. It wasn’t something he had really thought about much before. “I guess thinking we can’t live without a head vampire would be mine.”