#valueofsecrets

Mal, Tilly, Petyr, Painted Doll.

I'm writing this because I know...you four are the only ones who will miss me. I really am sorry, but I have to do this. I...I just can't stay as much as I really wish I could. 

Mal. You...you are the best thing in my life. But...well. You're an angel. You deserve better than a dead whore with no family, and who would have had no prospects, had I lived. You need, and you deserve, so much better than me. I hope one day you find it. Truly I do.

And...that's why I have to leave. I can't keep putting us through the pain of knowing how terribly short I fall of measuring up to you. it's better this way--quick, like a bandaid.

Tilly, Petyr...what you two have is beautiful. Protect it for me, please?

All of you, please, don't come looking for me. You won't find me. And don't worry--I'm staying within the borders, I'm not breaking the rules.

I love you all so much.

Lyr.

Writing that letter had been one of the hardest things Lyr had ever done. But all the same, she folded it into thirds and slipped it under Mal's favorite book. He was sure to find it when he came back.

She had already packed a bag, and she shouldered it now, just before spreading her wings and taking off. Flying usually cleared her head--she'd feel better by the time she reached her camp...

Listen to your heart, when he's calling for you...

What did that song have to do with anything?! Her inner thoughts reacted almost violently to the lyrics suddenly stuck in her head. But the song kept playing...

Listen to your heart, there's nothing else you can do. I don't know where you're going and I don't know why, but listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye...

She sighed and turned around. The song was right--she needed to think through this more. Maybe...maybe she was so much less than Mal deserved, but she was who he chose...She should respect that, at least. He didn't, though, deserve the heartbreak that he would feel when he read that note and realized she was gone...

She buried her face in Mal's chest, still crying quietly. She silently berated herself for it--you get worse than this for work, Lyr, stop being a baby about it.

She was in a rush--her last client had run over his allotted time, but was large enough that Lyr hadn't wanted to argue. And it was one that had her come to him instead of going to the brothel, so she had to hurry to get back in time to assist her next client. Damn Lord Baelish for scheduling them so close together!

He usually tried not to give into beggars. It was distasteful, really, and they were like pigeons--if you feed them once, they keep coming back. But this boy--he didn't look more than 17--looked to be intelligent. "I don't give nothing for nothing, boy. Tell me--how observant are you? Perhaps you could be gainfully employed..."

Malageth and Allyria,

Darling children, I am glad that we have sent you north to stay with the rest of House Likhanevala. My fears have come to pass. Dren hesitated on the information that I gave him and it has given Sethrin time to act. He has discredited his elder brothers and broken the line of succession. 

Worse still, he has accused Dren, Khain, Rivh, Gren, Anen, Petyr, and me of treason. He has evidence to back his claims. It is circumstantial and false, yet it is enough to do the damage. He cannot execute us. He has chosen instead to send us into exile.

As I write this, everything in the house is being packed. This letter will reach you just before the few friends that remain to me arrive with what we could not feasibly take with us. Relkus will know what will need to be stored and where. We must be out of the city by sunset or be killed on sight.

We are Outlaw. We cannot come to Vos-tai. It would bring dishonor upon the house. I have few doubts that Sethrin intends to send assassins after us. Relkus will know how to divine if we are still safe and breathing, so have no worries there. 

Do not fret. I have a plan. I always do. We need to lose any assassins quickly before I can act on the knowledge I possess. When it is safe, when honor is ours again, when we are secure, then I will send for you. Keep each other safe. Stay in Vos-tai. I love you both dearly, do not forget that.

The sun relents not. 

"Give it time, sweetling."

He didn't know how much the words hurt, how much hope she had pinned on him. So she didn't blame Mal for saying it. He had simply been honest. But that didn't change the fact. The words kept echoing in her mind, and every repetition was like driving a dull blade deeper into a wound already steeped in salt. But she wouldn't let him see that--and it was the first time she had ever been grateful she took to wearing the veils even in the house.

Allyria left the house quickly, once the conversation was through, unshed tears stinging her eyes. She wasn't paying particular attention to where she was going, she just wanted to get away from Malageth and his gentle comfort. She didn't want that, at least not from him. Not when her upset was because he had rejected her. 

And of course, that was her biggest mistake.

By the time she realized she had wandered into the Lower City unescorted it was too late. A large, rough hand ripped her veil away, then quickly clamped over her mouth, its partner gripping her hip and turning her by that. The man they belonged to was huge, and Allyria's eyes widened for a moment. Then some of her lessons from before set in, and she started struggling, sharp nails furrowing into the flesh of his face. There was a struggle, she knew that much for sure, but how it went was a blur.

"no, no no no NO."  Petyr can't help the anger that rises in him at Mal's quiet statement. "She can't be dead, she just can't." Every word simply drives the anger further, until he's pacing the floor, unable to keep still. She couldn't be dead. If she was--if she was, he had lost everything.