#valentinesdayalone

soooo lyyke 

i dont feel like shit because it valentines day 

why would i 

i have a huge 

huge 

bottle of my 

absolute favorite rum sailor jerry 

i plan on 

drinking heavily and cleaning my room 

then begging someone to smoke me up 

then getting ready 

to drink more 

to rage at the stood 

then to gregs 

where I will hopefully

 be getting laid

 by someone with a penis

and 

by someone without a penis

or 

both at the same time 

cause cat said shed be down for a threesome

on second thought 

 i kinda want the dick all to myself tonight 

ive seen to many vah jay jays this month  

havent fucked a dude since........

oh boy, since widdy fucked me in my car in times square two or three weeks ago 

haay 

maybe i can just fuck greg and get it over with 

might as well 

all we do is mope and drink anyway. 

i did really have something on my mind i wanted to say 

oh yeay 

i wanted to talk about how not upset i am 

so, no i dont miss liam 

i dont miss him on this day especially because weve never spend v-day together 

ive never spent this day with anyone romantic 

im accustomed to doting on my mom on valentines day 

which is just fine 

do i wish i could have had him

yes 

would i trade him for the way i feel about myself now

no 

despite my complaining i really do enjoy myself slightly more these days 

which is amazing 

im just so glad were civil 

if he didnt fight me every step of the way last year we could have had this going earlier 

it feels good to be finally getting over it 

yeay 

i do miss him sometimes 

i love him 

always will 

but i want someone to love me 

really really love me 

i want someone to feel about me the way i used to feel about him 

so im not opposed to waiting for that 

however long it takes

because at the end of the day im a hopeless romantic 

loving, love

disgusted at myself for admitting that 

and i know that missing my ex will keep me from finding what i want 

not only do i not want to be moping about him and how im not with anyone, all day 

i dont feel sad about it 

if he called me today to say happy valentines day i would be more amused than anything 

at least thats how i feel about it right now 

sober 

ill check back at around 2 am and see if my opinions change 

i like valentines day because

you have an excuse to be piss drunk all day and night 

or you also have an excuse to pamper yourself 

you get a 2 hr slot at the end of the night, right around the time everyone has alcohol poisoning, to cry about your ex with at least 4 other people without shame 

then you get to get over it quickly by grabbing the person closet to you and hooking up with them 

the v day walk of shame, is more like a walk of fame (idk)

chocolates of our own 

eating your friends chocolates when she leaves to hook up with her bf 

red and pink stuff in ribbons 

stopping by to visit my punk friends who will be watching horror movies and drinking vodka on this day 

walking by bodegas and stopping to smell the roses you cant afford to buy yourself let alone someone else. 

i guess my fave thing is you can make this day whatever you want and its perfectly ok 

if you wanna mope about your ex 

doo itt

if you wanna be all cutesy with your lover 

do that 

if you wanna have another halloween thats cool too

really cool actually 

i wanna do that 

point is 

this day is whatever you make it 

just like any other day 

the many interpretations of the holiday 

make it what it is