#valashfordthethird

our love is running into a burning building

Shiloh whirled on his heel from where he’d been on his way to find Aiden and ask him about going to dinner. His voice got low at the reply, trying not to grit his teeth hard enough to make them ache. “Don’t go there Ethan. Don’t do it. I’m perfectly fucking fine.”

our love is scattered ash with a burnt up feeling

“It’s the truth. Aiden’s as close to me as my own brothers but I know how he affects you. You keep letting him go too far, keep ignoring the obvious, and he’s going to grind your heart right down into the dust.” Ethan stood his ground with his arms as crossed as Shiloh’s were. There was no way he was going to back down when it was a choice between a fight and something worse.

and we are fading out, don’t wanna turn out the light

The crease between Shiloh’s eyes got deeper, the thumb pressing hard not doing anything to ease the headache building steadily. If anything it was making it worse. “There are so many reasons he could be staying somewhere else. okay? Hell, he could have met somebody if the presents are any indication. We’re fine. We’re perfectly fine. We’re still friends and that’s all we were anyway so that’s all that needs to stay in place.”

i’m no firefighter, i just need to breathe tonight

“Friends?” The laugh came out incredulous on Ethan’s end. “Would you stop trying to convince yourself of that idiocy? We tried to let you work this out on your own but you are so damn blind you can’t tell your ass from a hole in the ground. Admit you’ve been dating for months now and maybe you’ll realize why things are falling apart.” His temper was usually sealed tight but seeing people getting hurt always brought out the worst in him. “Maybe go tell him anything that’ll make him realize home is where you are.”

so sound the alarm

“Would you shut the fuck up? I am so tired of you thinking that just because you found your happy little bubble that you suddenly know what’s best for me. I am a grown man, Daniels, and I will do and say and believe whatever I want to because it’s the truth, no matter what you think. I am FINE. Fine. F-i-n-e. Can’t spell it any clearer than that.” He turned back towards the door and shoved his way out of Ethan’s office, blood simmering and rising steady towards a boil again. He’d gone way too far and he knew it, but there were things Shiloh was tired of hearing from everyone but the person he needed to know them, and if Aiden didn’t realize it then he’d bury it deep and pretend that he didn’t.

Shiloh can’t figure out what wakes him up at first. When he blearily looks at the blinking clock it’s nearing 4 a.m., and when they aren’t downstairs working he’s normally either got Aiden tucked into his side by now or they’re both fast asleep in separate rooms. Aiden had stayed late at Eden but he’d been so wiped from two meetings that the apartment had been calling his name. There's a dull laugh like someone just couldn't help themselves, and - Oh.

That was the noise Aiden made when he was being thoroughly kissing and enjoying himself. That was the sound of lips meeting lips, and then of a mark being sucked into pale skin that Shiloh would have to see paraded around the next day if he was particularly unlucky. Then something being unzipped and something hitting the floor. Was that the sound of knees falling onto carper? Was it clothing being flung? His imagination was occasionally a worse curse than anything and right now it was in overdrive.

Either they hadn't bothered to make it to a bedroom or Aiden hadn't bothered to close the door. The acoustics in here were excellent and the guest bedroom - now Aiden's bedroom - only hid sounds when the door was pushed shut. They had to be drunk. At least a few drinks in. Aiden would have more tact than to get off in the middle of the living room usually (or at least he was pretty sure he would).

There was an angry feeling in his stomach that was building and tightening. The nausea was getting stronger, and the cold blast of air from the box fan made it exponentially worse. Finally Shiloh caved, pushing himself out of bed and to his feet to turn the fan off. If he had a glimpse out of the cracked door in the meantime, well, that was entirely on accident.

That was a bad idea. The birthmark on Aiden’s thigh that Shiloh thought was shaped like a starfish was on full display, and the other guy - who looked suspiciously like the high tipper who’d tried to bribe Ethan into coming out from behind the bar to dance - was kissing his way down the taut stomach. There were moans coming out that Shiloh had never heard anyone but himself coax out. Maybe he’d been mistaken to think that moving in together could lead to anything more than trouble. There was no grand romance that was going to happen, no admitting anything, just learning to deal with Aiden being with someone else. Maybe letting himself move on, then, and go back to thinking of them as two friends who fucked occasionally.

The nausea turned into something much more full blown, and it was with a low whine that Shiloh turned and rushed towards the bathroom. Nothing happened (which but the cool metal of the toilet cover felt cool against his skin. Maybe he could beg off work tomorrow. Fake a stomach bug and refuse to move or talk to anyone but Ethan tomorrow.

Maybe he could go the petty route and make a set of roommate rules that strictly enforced all intimacy being in private areas. Leave a set of wet wipes on the couch with a “at least have the decency to clean up after yourselves” note attached. 

Not that any of that would happen. Shiloh would dull everything with a few glasses of whiskey before squaring his shoulders, taking a nice long shower, and dragging himself out of bed in the morning. Work came first. Acting like everything was normal came first. 

[Set after they get back to NYC, after a long weekend full of event planning, sexual endeavors, and work, work, work.]

“...Saturday morning, I think?” Shiloh rubbed at his exhausted eyes and leaned back into Aiden, abandoning his spreadsheets full of budget planning to steal a quick kiss that tastes vaguely of the chinese doughtnuts they’d devoured at lunchtime. Even his downtime was never really relaxing and thankfully everyone in his life seemed to know and understand that.

[Set a very long time in the future, about six months after The Lost Years - aka months]

“Then stop fucking pretending like you are!” Shiloh’s voice raised inch by inch, his temper worse than it’d been in months. All the lingering sadness had been replaced with something that was making his blood boil, and every sly look Valentine’s way, every nonchalant “look how sexy the blonde haired man he’s with is” from one of the other workers, every quiet dismissal from Aiden was making it worse.

For a brief few weeks Shiloh had thought he was the only one dealing with any of this. Even when he’d realized it wasn’t true the evidence was next to nothing. His boyfriend was acting like the world hadn’t tilted on its ass when Valentine-fucking-Ashford waltzed back into the walls of Eden, like nothing was different or painful. Breathing had become difficult but did anyone seem to notice? No. He couldn’t be friends with Valentine like they’d never been lovers. He couldn’t play nice with some asshole who - and he knew it wasn’t appropriate to bash the “new SO” but he didn’t care - was spending every night in Valentine’s bed. He couldn’t kiss Aiden every single night without acknowledging that something was missing. There was a giant gaping hole smack dab on the right side of the bed. A missing cup in the revolving door of chipped secondhand coffee cups that graced their cupboards. A stupid tie-dyed blanket that’d gone missing months ago from the recliner.

It’d taken weeks, months for Aiden to finally speak up, and it’d taken Valentine with his lips on some curly haired motherfucker in front of them for the fight (that seemed to be aimed at someone not even in the room) to happen. 

“If neither of us are alright then - then maybe it’s time to say something. Maybe it’s time to stop faking like everything’s perfect between us whenever he’s around and actually say something. Call him out on it, or… I don’t know. I don’t know what you’re supposed to do in a situation like this. He’s been back for as long as he was gone and nothing feels as ‘better’ as I thought it’d would…”

Done and done!

VALENTINE - 

Valentine’s hair gets a little too long in the winter when his ears start turning red. (He keeps forgetting to bring his hat to work with him.) He’s not a California boy at heart but he acts like one and his body follows suit. 

Which speaking of - Sun and outdoors suit him, and when he’s cooped inside or stuck with a pile of snow he starts to get mopey and a little depressed. Ralph will be the one that eventually shoves a hat down over Val’s hair, orders him to get dressed, and takes him out hiking just to keep him from getting “Winter Fever” a la Val’s version of Cabin Fever.

He loves cartoons. While Aiden and Shiloh will sleep in because of their extremely weird work schedules, Val will be up with a bowl of cereal on the end of the bed flipping through the kid’s Saturday Morning cartoons.

AIDEN - 

He’s fucking loyal. Honestly, people don’t expect it because he flaunts a lifestyle that isn’t “monogamous” in the way that people seem to expect, but once he and Shiloh and Valentine have firmly figured their stuff out, he’s not going to “stray”. Open communication is key given their temperaments and he lets Shiloh push for it with things like that.

Those fruity drinks? He secretly hates them. Lets the guys at the bar order them (or the occasional girl) for him but they all get sent Shiloh’s way because he’s got the sweet tooth. It’s worse when he and Val are both behind the bar because the assumptions come from the gorgeous faces they’re serving who want in their pants (with nothing in return) and it makes Aiden grit his teeth.

When Ethan calls him his brother for the first time Aiden buys a whole stack of ridiculously cheesy birthday cards and sends seventeen of them to Ethan with a note that simply says “Asshole” because it’s easier for him to tease than to genuinely deal with feelings.

RALPH - 

Ralph gets roped into running a 5K with Jessie when she’s in 5th grader. It’s the first time he admits that he might be getting a little bit old - and it’s the year he gets gifted with a certificate to a local massage place that’ll allow him one massage a week for the rest of the year. The two things are directly related but if you talk to Ralph he wouldn’t tell you that.

The paintings in the apartment are his. They’re pictures of one or both or all of them, and they date back to the second time that they sleep together. Ethan knows they aren’t all appropriate, but Ralph knows that for right now sentimental value takes higher precedence. 

DANGIT AUDS.

RALPH - Ralph bans shoes twice in the house when they move out of the apartments and into an actual house. The first time, it happened because Ethan’s niece tried to put doll shoes on Johnny-the-not-so-puppy-anymore and Johnny is usually so patient but it freaked him out. It seemed like a good blanket solution, and since both of them are almost always barefoot anyway it didn’t affect them too much. 

The second time it’s because their daughter, Jessie, found a mud puddle and tracked in so much from the yard that Ethan was cursing up a blue moon cleaning it up and Ralph (amidst laughing at the two of them and sneaking Jessie a juice box) decided just to prevent the problem from ever happening again by putting a sign on the front porch to leave all shoes on the rug by the front door.

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Ooooh man, you are so very welcome.