#v.002

    A father was a shadow, to Neo. He remembered him only in photographs on a mantlepiece a million miles away. He remembered the breadth of his palm as it fell on his shoulder when he graduated college. He remembered the rasp of his breath. He remembered that he was too late. That he wasn’t half the son he’d hoped he would be. It was senseless, now, he knew that. All of it had been designed by a machine. The alienation he had felt. None of it amounted to anything. He was a black and white picture, written in binary code. It could have been any woman, any man, that created him. He felt no sentimental attachment, there, and he’d felt that way long before he woke in his pod. He wondered how it felt for a program, to try and understand its relation to others with no language but the organic. What did that word mean to Smith? Neo was glad to have the barrier of his dark shades, his eyes so often gave the game away. “I don’t think so,” he replied, his voice mild, one dark brow cocked. He wouldn’t let his guard down, he knew better than that by now. But Smith had a habit of spinning an opener before he raised a hand against him. And maybe Neo had developed a habit of indulging it. 

    “You know what your problem is, Smith?” He piped up, taking a few measured paces back from him, allowing himself the distance to move against him, if he had to. “You set too much store by this whole... fate, thing,” Neo’s hand rose from his dark sleeve, gesturing vaguely around. They always met this way, as if in the middle of a dream, in halfway between stops, in liminal places. Tonight it was a train station, tonight everyone knew to pass them by, not to step out onto the platform. Maybe that was the Matrix itself, closing its doors around them, reluctant to interrupt. Neo could see the flash of the train carriages in the argent streak that glared around the grey edges of Smith’s electric blue eyes. “Nothing is decided yet, aren’t we proof of that?”

a hero’s guilt meme pt. 2

       part of her heart clings to the words in a bid to make them feel more true, but only a little manages to grasp it. her past choices color everything and her head takes over - as bellamy knows well. he also wouldn’t say something like this lightly. another blessing that comes with his friendship is that bellamy doesn’t lie. if he was telling her this, he wasn’t making it up. but being completely likeminded with someone else came with such great difficulty - there would always be a disconnect somewhere. 

       still, bellamy said it, meant it, and she decides to receive what she can. 

various starters

        “i’m not afraid. just because we can breathe down here without dying doesn’t mean certain things can’t still kill us. it’s called being cautious. and besides, being brave enough to do something doesn’t guarantee that it’s smart. spacewalker.”

a hero’s guilt meme pt. 2

      “how can you think like that??” it’s impossible to miss the incredulity in her voice. “these are our people. we are not going to just let them die, not if we can help it! there’s always a way. we just have to find it.” angrily, she purses her lips. 

a hero’s guilt meme pt. 2

a hero’s guilt meme pt. 2

          her mother means well - always means so well. but clarke can’t help but second guess someone’s motives when they tell her something like this. there have been too many failures, too many upsets and changes of plan to really know. it’s a rule now that she can only believe people have reason to be proud if she herself thinks so first. currently, abby’s odds of getting her point across don’t look so good. 

          “we’re going to have to teach all of these kids to shoot now. you do realize that, right?”