#utlkpop

You hesitate to open your eyes, but slowly do so. As you rub any sleep from your eyes, you notice that you’re already alone and incredibly sore. You sit up with a slight frown, carefully getting out of bed. You wonder where Seungcheol went as you wander towards the fireplace. 

You pick up your soiled underwear, and your nose immediately scrunches in disgust. They were oddly wet, but not just from your arousal. It was similar to when you would have a stickier discharge, but you knew this wasn’t from you. 

You set them down in the laundry bin before making your way to the door, peering outside at the guards. Their faces flush ever so slightly as one of them speaks up. 

“Your highness! One of your maids was just on her way to finish getting heated water for your bath. She should be back soon,” he manages to get out. 

You nod and manage to make it back to your bed, looking more carefully at the covers this time. You frown when you notice only a stain from Seungcheol’s cum mixed with your juices, but no blood. 

Before you can get too lost in that thought, Sewan knocks on the door and enters with a bottle of some sort of perfume or soap. 

“Your highness! I’m glad to see you’re awake! If you can make it this way, your bath is about ready,” Sewan says, pushing a door open with her foot. 

You carefully stand back up and follow where she went, hearing the sound of running water. The soothing scent of lavender hits your nose as you manage to come inside, finding a large tub in the floor of the room. Off to an alcove is a toilet, which you make use of. You notice the plug still inside of you, and you’re unsure what to do about it. So, you choose to leave it for the meantime.

“Your highness, I don’t mean to overstep, but before Seungcheol left, he told me you were wearing a plug? And that you may not know what to do about it?” You hear Sewan say, stepping aside so she could see you. 

“He left?” you ask, your lips pursing into a frown. 

“Yes, it seems there was an emergency in the fourteenth district that he went to settle. He said he informed you, but that you feel right back asleep…” 

You hum, knowing that when you were exhausted it could be hard to wake you and that you were prone to sleep talking at times. 

“Well, he told me that you could take it out and that you probably should as well. Would you like help, or-?” 

You shake your head as you carefully hold it, relaxing your muscles as you pull it out. You immediately get goosebumps, surprised by the foreign feeling of it. 

“Set it here, and we can clean it,” Sewan says, holding out a small towel in her hands. 

You set it there before finishing up and washing your hands. 

“This is a soap that you should use for it. It’s specifically made for sexual objects to keep them clean,” Sewan says, opening a cabinet and showing you the soap. “You want to make sure you clean it after every use, and often before each use as well to stay sanitary and avoid infections.” 

“Infections?” you ask curiously, washing it off as directed. 

“Yes, you can get vaginal infections, as well as skin infections on the outside. All very unpleasant, I have been told,” Sewan informs you, offering a clean towel to dry it. “And then once dry, store it in this,” she adds, handing you a perfectly sized sack for the vaginal plug. 

You put it inside and pull the strings, placing it next to the soap in the cabinet, groaning as you bend down. 

“Why don’t we get you into a bath then?” 

“Please,” you murmur, leaning on her for support as you walk to the tub. 

Sewan helps you take off your nightgown, and you carefully step down into the tub. You can’t help the soft moan that escapes you as you enter the warm water, as it immediately soothes your body. 

You take the moment to look down at yourself, noticing the bruising on your hips and thighs. “Is it normal to be so bruised?” you softly ask her, uncertainly tracing the marks. 

Sewan sits next to you outside of the tub, peering down at your thighs with a soft, affectionate laugh. “Yes, it is. And you do have more of them. Here is the mirror,” she giggles, handing the handheld mirror to you. 

As you take it, you nearly drop it in shock at the vibrant marks that bloomed down your neck and chest. 

“There is a high-necked gown I can wear, right?” you ask, gingerly tracing the bruises. 

“Of course, your highness. We can also cover what shows with makeup, for now, if it makes you uncomfortable,” Sewan informs you. 

You hum softly and nod, letting yourself relax in the bath and enjoy your time getting ready for the day. 

When you are fully dressed and satisfied with your appearance, you are led to a dining room, which is more intimate than the entire dining hall. 

As you enter, you find Chan inside, reading reports and seemingly waiting for you. 

“Good morning, your highness,” Chan says, bowing slightly as he pulls out the chair next to him. 

“Good morning, Chan,” you murmur as you sit, your cheeks heating up as you remember how closely he watched you with Seungcheol the night prior. 

“Since you were asleep when Seungcheol ate and left, I figured I would eat with you in his stead… if that is alright with you?” Chan says. It was customary for the newlyweds to eat in the morning together at least on their first morning together. Given the circumstances, that clearly was impossible. 

“No, I don’t mind the company,” you admit with a slight shake of your head. You much preferred it over eating alone, especially in such a grand room. 

You find Chan to be rather agreeable and easy to talk to. When you would feel uncertain or not know what to say, he would either be reassuring or alter the topic so you would be comfortable. 

Once you finish your plate, the loneliness catches up to your soul. You had been bound to another, and he had left you alone in a foreign place among foreign people. Your soul wept at the realization. You swallow the overwhelming feeling, letting it settle for the moment. 

“I must apologize, Chan. You shouldn’t have to have a soiled wife,” you say, unable to meet his eyes as you practically flee the room. 

His chair falls as he stands, and you can tell he intends to race after you. The guards outside the door are startled by your behavior, but you were quick to lose any followers. 

Certainly, there was an ache inside. No one deserved the treatment you were being given. Loneliness threatens to overwhelm you, your mind and heart racing alongside your body. You run until you can’t, not caring if you were lost. 

You halt outside in a garden, which you know immediately is not the main garden. You sink to the ground, dirtying your elegant garments carelessly. You stare at your reflection in the pond, watching as large, nearly cat-sized koi come to greet you on the off chance you had food. 

“My apologies to you as well, little ones,” you murmur, tears falling from your eyes and into the pool. 

Most of them soon learn you have no intention of feeding them and excuse themselves, but a few smaller ones remain to keep you company. A bitter laugh escapes you as you wonder, “do you think it’s raining?” as your tears continue to fall, your form beginning to tremble. 

Weak. 

You knew crying made you weak. 

You prayed no one would hear or see you in such a sorry state. 

You wept your heart out, ignoring the distant cries of “your highness” even as the sky begins to cry with you. 

The perverse desire of falling into the pond began to overwhelm you, so you know it is time to remove yourself from the area. Thunder booms above you as you stand, your cloudy vision causing you to trip into the pool. 

You couldn’t tell how deep it was as your body slowly hurled forward, and you gave in to the inevitable. You heard the splash of the water delayed as you began to sink, a silent cry escaping you. 

But the perverse desire was becoming a reality, so why even try to fight it? 

You feel another’s arms wrap around your waist as you give into the foggy haze your brain was turning into. Why have the need for hope when you were given away and set aside so easily? 

The blankets were oddly warm as you begin to wake, and you can sense someone by your side. Your eyes barely open, and you find yourself staring into those of a man sitting near your husband on the night of your wedding. He was familiar, yet you couldn’t put a name to him. His white hair should have given him away, but it was just out of reach. 

His pale hand lightly feathers over your forehead and temple, as he softly whispers, “You’re safe, Y/N. Focus on healing for me, alright?” The same hand rests on the crown of your head, encouraging more warmth to flow within your body. At that moment, you realize he is fae, and just as you begin to remember his name, you’re gone. 

The next time you regain consciousness, you are completely aware of the heavy fever you are running. You were never ill or sickly, so your current state was a surprise for you. 

“Your highness?” you hear Sewan call for you. “His highness was able to write you a letter,” she continues, noticing you doing your best to respond. 

My lovely wife, 

I can’t apologize enough in writing for the state I’ve put you in. It was never my intention to leave without saying goodbye-now I know you sleep talk, so I will be certain you are awake if I must ever leave abruptly. (which hopefully I never will!) 

My beautiful Y/N, feel better soon. I will return as quickly as I can subdue them. If Chan and the others aren’t taking care of you well enough, I will make a fuss worse than the mating displays of dragons. Which, if you have never seen, I assure you you never want to. Not because it's disturbing, but that it is destructive.

I know you are uncertain with your experiences and body, so I wanted you to know, in writing, that you are completely and totally allowed to touch yourself in my absence. Remember how I caressed you and worshiped you like you deserve, and know that when I return, I look forward to doing so again. Only if you are in the mood and up for it, of course. 

-S.Coups 

If you could have focused on her, you would have been well aware of how red Sewan’s face became at the words she was reading. But alas, you were already falling back asleep into a fever dream. 

The next time you woke up, you felt completely refreshed. Your body still felt weak, but you needed to bask in the rays of the afternoon sun. You are slow to sit up, the rustle of the blankets alerting Sewan, who must have fallen asleep at your side. Her head rested on the bed, but she quickly sat up and tried to fix herself. 

Right away, you knew she had been with you the entire time. 

“How long have I been ill?” you manage to ask her in a hoarse voice. 

“Three days,” she tells you, quickly getting up. “Let me have someone get you food and water, okay?” Sewan rushes out as you slowly get up, carefully steadying yourself with the left chair.

Sewan comes back and helps you prepare yourself for the day, helping you into a comfortable dress that wasn’t too tight. 

“His highness Chan would like to see you, your highness,” she tells you as she finishes your hair. 

You do your best to hold back your groan, managing a slight nod instead. “I’ll be fine with him then. Make sure you rest up, okay?” you say as you stand up. 

“And his highness Jeonghan wants to check on you, but I’m sure he will find you. Don’t do anything too intense, okay?” Sewan adds, her eyebrows knitting in worry. 

“I won’t. I will probably just relax in the sunlight. I need it,” you say with a soft laugh. It wasn’t too bitter, as you meant it. 

Outside, you end up on a bench swing facing a large oak tree. You try guessing its age as you swing back and forth, and decide on around two hundred years old. 

If I see someone I will ask them to find out for me. 

You soon hear the sound of footsteps on the stone path, and you steady yourself with a deep breath before looking up at your companion. 

Chan had his hair swept back from his forehead, making him look practically unreal. By the slight tenseness of his brows and jaw muscles, you could tell he was nervous. “May I join you?” he asks.

You nod slightly, saying, “of course you may.”

He carefully sits down, gently having the swing go back into the gentle pace you were swinging in. 

“I’m glad you are feeling better. Is being outside helping?” he asks, watching you.

“I think so. It’s a good change, too,” you murmur.

“The sunlight will help,” he says gently. Chan pauses, and you feel your nerves bundling into a knot. “I don’t care if you’re a virgin or not,” He begins. “I know we don’t know each other too well, but I do want to get to know you better.” 

Your cheeks heat up at his words, and you stare at the ground. 

“I don’t mind you also being with Hyung. I can love you anyway, and I want you to give me a chance too. Both of us a chance,” Chan continues. “I’m sure you are still more used to monogamy, but just consider polygamy, okay? If you don’t want to love me, we can pretend.” It’s obvious the thought hurts him, but Chan sincerely wants what is best for you. 

You tap your fingers idly on the armrest of the swing, considering how honest to be with him. You always were taught to tell the truth, but in school, you learned to keep it short and to yourself. What good is a lady if she talks and causes problems? 

You lick your lips, preparing yourself for the brutal truth that you decide to share. “I always felt that people were supposed to be monogamous, and anything else was immoral. But as a young child, I found that my father had… many affairs and… women tending his bed beside my mother. It’s… why the lion suits him so well,” you begin, staring at the old tree. “I vowed never to take more than one partner when I was younger. It… it wasn’t anything official, of course, it was to myself… and I never expected to be in this situation,” you further explain yourself. 

“I don’t think it’s something anyone could have expected,” Chan softly assures you. 

“And, well, it’s hard to accept that. Especially because I feel-” you stop yourself short. Admitting it out loud would make it more real, and you didn’t enjoy the thought. 

“How does it make you feel? It’s okay to tell me the truth, I won’t get mad,” Chan gently prods. 

“I feel like a pawn. Like I’m just being used. Or a ball being kicked from one person to another, for whoever it suits best,” you admit, tears escaping your eyes as if someone didn’t turn off the faucet all the way. 

Chan brings a handkerchief to your eyes, his arm hand dabbing away your tears. “Is it your father that is making you feel this way, do you think?” he softly asks, letting you take the handkerchief. 

A slight nod is all he needs. 

“I know I certainly don’t intend to use you like that, and I’m sure Hyung can feel the same. Besides, if you want to throw him in prison now, you can,” Chan giggles at the thought. 

“I have no real charges against him,” you laugh. 

“You’re the empress, you don’t need any!” Chan points out. 

“But morals! Someone has to have them!” 

You could tell he pulled the weight off your chest as you laugh wholeheartedly. “Thank you, Chan,” you murmur.

“You don’t have to thank me, Y/N,” he responds, shaking his head. 

“I do!” 

“No, you don’t!”

“But I do!” You continue to bicker, even if it was unbecoming for your station. 

Chan rolls his eyes dramatically, causing you to gasp in a similar manner. “How dare you roll your eyes at your empress!” you tease.

“What are you going to do about it? Punish me?” he teases back. 

“I certainly could!” you say, unsure how. 

“I think you’d rather be punished,” he says in a sultry voice, sending an interesting sensation to your stomach that has you clenching your thighs. 

“You- you wouldn’t dare!” you scoff, your cheeks heating up with a blush.

“Oh, but I would,” he promises, getting up as servants find the two of you and offering you his hand to help you up. 

The servant curtseys before explaining herself, “Your highness, your lunch is prepared and awaiting you. Would you like us to serve it outside, and would you like to keep current company?” 

Chan looks at you and raises an eyebrow as you take his hand to stand. You know the decision is solely yours, and you doubt he would be truly offended if you wanted to eat alone. 

“Yes, I would love the company if he is willing,” you decide, gracefully linking your arm with his so he could guide you back (because you have, perhaps, gotten a bit lost). “And outside would be nice.” 

Chan gently leads you back, following the servant who quickly goes out of sight. 

“So, have you tried touching yourself yet?” Chan unashamedly asks, taking a bite of food once you were seated. 

You, of course, practically choke on your food, giving him a stern look. 

“Got it, you have not,” he says, nodding. “But you can, so you should.” 

“I, thank you very much, have been ill, so,” you defend yourself. 

“That’s good. Do you need, um, food for thought?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. 

“Lee Chan!” you scold him, your cheeks blushing despite your intrigue. 

“Okay, okay. Just think about what Hyung did and what you’d want us to do,” he suggests with a shrug, allowing the topic to change. “Is there anything you would like to make your life more comfortable here?” 

You think for a moment as you sit down where your lunch was prepared, Chan helping you sit. 

“Well, I never had much time for myself,” you admit. 

“Were you too busy studying, or-?” Chan asks, leaving it open-ended on purpose. 

“Almost every minute of my life was strictly scheduled,” you inform him with a shake of your head, taking a moment to sip the cool water servants had prepared. “Needless to say, I wasn’t given much of an opportunity to think for myself.” 

It was truly a pity, seeing as your station called for personal thought. Despite studying many philosophers from all over the lands, you still found it difficult to think for yourself. 

“Well… one thing I’m not good at is alliances and information on individual kingdoms. Sure, I know all of the princes' names and your respective countries, but nothing else. Do you think… is there someone who could teach me?”

Chan does his best not to laugh as he takes a bite of the sandwich prepared for him. “I will see who I can convince to do what,” he graciously replies.

A few days later, Sewan takes you to the hall to meet the tutor Chan had arranged for you. (And Seungcheol, she assured you). 

You knew right away they are a mage, considering the aura of magic already surrounding the room. Perhaps it was a build of their presence, as Sewan informs you that he “tends to spend a good deal of time in here when he can.” 

Upon entering the library, there was the usual and occasional thud of books and the sound of people breathing. Or, perhaps, someone taking a nap. “After you introduce us, check to see if that sleeper is drooling,” you confide in Sewan, worried about the state of the collection. 

As you make your way deeper into the room, continuously getting surprised at how large the room must be, you find a desk off to the side stacked with books, scrolls, and loose paper. 

"Here he is," Sewan whispers as he stands up. 

He was tall and handsome and was definitely at the wedding.

"Ah, my lady," he says, smiling. You had to admit, he was charming. And reading your favorite book, so it seemed. 

"Oh! Have you read this one before?" You ask, lightly running your finger down its spine. 

"Yes, actually. It's one of my favorites, your highness," he says with a slight chuckle. "My name is Wonwoo. I'm honored Chan asked me to do this for you." 

You were uncertain if he was telling the truth or not. Perhaps you were an unwanted burden, more so than you already were. Pushing the thought aside, you wonder if Seungcheol approved of this. 

“Hopefully his highness won’t be offended by this arrangement. And please, call me Y/N,” you say with a small smile. 

“I doubt he will, so fear not,” Wonwoo assures you. 

After a pause, he speaks up again. “I suppose we can start with the current geography then,” he states, picking up a scroll and handing it to you. Wonwoo points to a more lavish desk nearby, instructing you, “Sit. I will get the others.” Before he goes off and begins to find more books. 

You dismiss Sewan and sit down, opening the scroll. A lioness paperweight, which peeves you more than it should, sits on the desk, and you use it to keep the scroll open. You grumble slightly at it. Glancing around, you noticed this end of the library was rather empty. On your right was a much larger and exquisite desk. It seemed well used, and could only belong to Seungcheol. You were grateful that your desk was placed where it was, as it was a show of your position and worth. 

A thud of books falling snaps you out of your thought process and back to the map under your palms.

It was the same continent you’ve seen many times, but this time broken down separately. There were seventeen separate regions, and you couldn’t understand the numbering system. Where you currently were at the capital was one, and your previous home was three. It didn’t add up for you. 

Before the opportunity arises for you to ask Wonwoo, he explains the strange phenomena. “The continent is divided into numerical sectors. It’s easier for us this way instead of many names. The numbers correlate to who is from them. So here, one, is his majesty is from. Where you are from is where Joshua hyung is from, which is three. I am from here, six. It goes by the age of each council member.” 

“But there are only thirteen of you,” you point out, puzzled. 

Wonwoo smiles and pushes up his glasses, leaning on the stack of books he produced on your desk. “Yes, but the other four are unoccupied and consist of dangerous lands and lands we intend to protect. They are also rather dangerous. Which is why his majesty is in fourteen at the moment.” 

“It is quite far,” you muse, your finger running from the capital to Sector Fourteen. “What is dangerous about them?” you ask, looking up at him curiously. 

“Some is the terrain in general. Sixteen is mostly volcanic, and also home to dragons. They live peacefully with us, so they’re not considered a threat. Fourteen often has what people consider ‘dark’ beings,” Wonwoo begins, air quoting “dark.” He sighs before continuing, “In truth, some are beasts with little intellect, like most ogres, but some are more dangerous, like feral werewolves. Dark beings normally just have no sense of reason or morality and are therefore labeled as ‘dark’. Which can also be unfortunate, as some ogres are perfectly content without harming humans, and many, if not the majority, of werewolves are fully capable of conversations like ours and can be quite intelligent.” 

You nod, more curious about your subjects. You had only ever met humans, but knew the continent consisted of more than just that. “I am unfamiliar with most beings,” you admit. 

“Not to worry, your highness,” Wonwoo says with a smile, “Most of us are good representations of our lands, and are not all humans. We have elves, fae, vampires, werewolves, and yours truly is a warlock. Which, I suppose, could make me human, but magic lengthens my life for the most part, so…” Wonwoo drifts off, realizing he may be sharing too much information. 

“Really?” you ask, surprised. 

“Yes, I can also find a book on different humanoids and those considered subjects if you’d like me to,” he offers with a charming smile. 

You look away bashfully, knowing his smile was not intended to charm you but made your heart flutter nonetheless. You weren’t used to men smiling at you.

After clearing your throat, you respond, “I would appreciate that, m- Wonwoo.”

He nods, shuffling the stacks of books around to find the one he wanted. “I would advise you to read this one first. It explains what the Sectors are like, and is a brief compilation of their history, geography, and anthropology,” he says, placing the book titled World: 17 Sectors in front of you. 

“You wrote it?” you inquire, your fingers running over the name of the editor- “Jeon Wonwoo.” 

“Indeed, but I did my best to make the others do their Sectors. Minghao actually did all of his,” Wonwoo admits. 

“But you did all the work in the long run then?” you ask, opening the book. 

“Well…” he begins, scratching the back of his neck, “I suppose so.” Wonwoo pauses for a moment longer as you flick through the title page and table of contents. “I’ll leave you be, your highness. Feel free to call my name if you are in need of my assistance or have any questions at all,” he tells you. 

After a while, you decide to take a break and head outside. You go to the garden and do your best to find the koi pond again. Unable to do so and also rather lost, you find a gardener and ask for their assistance. 

They lead the way and give you directions back, and you’re certain they’re off to tell others where you are so you wouldn’t get lost again. 

You sit at the bench and watch the fish surface, eagerly coming towards the bench once they notice you. 

“I don’t have any food for you,” you softly laugh at their behavior.