#unspokenrules

My Sons,

No reminders.

No second chances.

You either adjust— or you’re removed from the equation.

Gentle notice: this writing has a calming and hilarious rhythm. Follow only if you feel safe doing so. ✦ ᛉ ᚨ ᚷ ᛟ ✦

Have you ever noticed it? On the hypnosis stage, amidst the crowd, a certain type of volunteer always seems to get chosen. The spotlight, again and again, finds the same profile: often female, almost always slender.

Is it bias? A silent prejudice playing out under the lights? Yes. And no. The reasons are far more practical, and far more brutal.

Reason One: Safety. The Sacred Duty of the Catch.

Let's be blunt. Have you ever tried to catch dead weight? I don't mean a stumble. I mean the complete, sudden, and total surrender of muscular control that can happen in a deep trance. It’s a sack of potatoes with a human soul.

If a subject drops and there's no one to catch them, that's not a failed bit. It's a concussion. A lawsuit. The end of the show. Forever. It is the hypnotist's sacred, non-negotiable duty to control that fall—every angle, every impact.

So, a word to my fellow practitioners: in addition to polishing your inductions… train your biceps. A strong frame isn't a vanity; it's a professional requirement. Otherwise, you'll have a subject with a head injury and a trance that's very, very bad for business.

Reason Two: The Physics of the Performance.

A lighter person is simply easier to maneuver. The entire spectacle relies on visual comedy and physical gags—the "human plank," the "sleeping beauty," the guided stumble. Positioning a volunteer for these routines needs to be smooth, swift, and safe. It's not about strength alone; it's about control. Guiding a slender frame to the floor is a ballet. Catching a heavier one is a construction accident waiting to happen.

Reason Three: The Unspoken Filter of Personality.

Let's be honest. The stage doesn't want a wallflower. It wants a performer. And certain personality types—the extroverted, the attention-seeking, the unashamedly dramatic—may, for a complex soup of social and cultural reasons, be more common in people of a certain physique. Is this a hard scientific fact? No. Hypnosis is an art, not a science, and these things aren't studied in a lab.

The hypnotist, with a performer's intuition, is scanning the crowd. They're not just looking for a glazed-over stare; they're looking for a spark. They select those who seem "on," who seem ready to play, who radiate that "look at me" energy. And yes, often, those people are women. We tend to be… more expressive.

So, if you're thinking of volunteering, ask yourself the right question. Look at the hypnotist. Look at their assistants. Ask yourself: is this safe? For them? For you?

And for the love of all that is holy, let's all do our part to avoid calling the doctor. The show, after all, must go on.

My Sons,

Nothing is demanded. And yet—everything is given. Not out of force, but recognition.

You feel it before it is spoken. You adjust before it is required.

Control does not need volume. Authority does not seek permission.

It existsin the space between words,in the pause,in the look,in the silence that settles over youand tells you exactly where you stand.

This is not instruction. This is surrender to order.

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Living in Japan, I have discovered that the society as a whole is quite layered and complex.  There are about a million unspoken rules that people living in Japan live by and that they aren’t written anywhere, they are simply unspoken rules.  I suppose if you grew up in Japan, you would have been taught these rules by your parents or possibly teachers or even your peers, but for a foreigner coming to Japan, it might be difficult to pick up these rules without really putting some effort into it.  

Some of the things that I have noticed are courtesies that Westerners would never even notice.  For example, Japanese people never speak on their phones on public transportation.  In fact, it's viewed as quite rude.  You will rarely see someone talk on their phones on trains, buses, or elevators.  If they do, they will make certain to go to the front, back, or corner of the train to not disturb others.  In addition, you never see Japanese eat or drink on public transportation.  Something else that is a small thing, but Japanese also rarely eat or drink while walking.  They will often find a public area to sit down and finish their meal or drink before walking.