Today I was at work and the family I was with decided we were going fishing.
I am dressed...in a crochet skirt...and a black dress shirt...and ballet flats. But hey, not my visit, if the kid wants to go fishing we're going fishing!
It's wonderful, it's 95°F, humid af, after 3 hours I am dripping in sweat but i'm not gonna quit bc this is my job. To keep families together. I will DEAL.
Dad admits he doesn't know the way to the closest actual trail bc we just...said fuck the trail.
I accept my fate...and we begun hiking. I triapse through 5ft to 6ft tall grass and plants and we end up crawling out onto the sidewalk on all fours, shaking like dogs to dislodge ticks.
A dog barks
I look up, I can only imagine what this influencer looking woman is seeing. A 20 something woman, curly red hair matted with sweat, in a crochet skirt covered in ticks and plant matter, dripping sweat and panting, no shoes, she is holding them in her hand...shaking like a dog.
Her dog barks again. "Maxie no!" She looks at me. "E w."
My client pauses and watches me, and I just...start fuckin laughing. I look like a bloody cryptic midwest demon. I repeat back in my best influencer voice- "E w~"
I am defeated physically but psychologically I am always victorious bc I cannot be made to give a fuck
