#underflow

God's normalest soldier. I know it's off-type and a patrolwoman is only knight-adjacent, but I have to at least talk about some of the things she's done. In no particular order, this fish:

- Once intimidated a Victorian noble into submission, entirely by accident, by being perfectly capable of keeping up with his small talk and outdoing him in talking about the weather; she later recalled this entire conversation, word for word, from memory so she could recount it to her girlfriend and ask what she'd done wrong

- Constantly draws squiggles and squares on her sketchpad in a way that helps her think but is incomprehensible to anyone else... except the Doctor, and honestly that's basically worse than if even they didn't understand; this got to the point that Warfarin - an actual medical doctor - assumed she must think too fast for her own brain to keep up with and needs the sketchpad as an assistive device

- Compiled a detailed report of her own life, including extremely private events, and then stood stock-still for seven hours while a mortified Doctor read it, incapable of speaking up about how abnormal it was due to how intimidating she is

- Was rejected from the Abyssal Hunters program, not for being the only person insane enough to willingly apply to have Eldritch Jellyfish Goo injected into her veins, but because she was doing it to mimic the world's edgiest DILF

- Regularly spends hours in the kitchen creating 'food' that's more akin to sensory experiences, like chewing herbs or spiced jerky you're only meant to let soak in your mouth, then pairs those with artful poems or delicate drawings; she then puts them in the cabinets because she's too used to uploading things to the Atlantis 3D Printer Omninet, where they're promptly snatched by Ceobe before anyone can see

- Has several kinds of neurotoxin that she can apply to her gun, all of which have meticulously thought-through use cases

- Wrote a thesis on the ineffectual physical results of coffee as a stimulant, after shotgunning 10 espressos and not feeling a thing, and proceeded to extol the virtues of the drink as effectively a placebo since all the culture around coffee implies it should work, and so that's why she assumes it does; she even blended her usual stimulants with coffee in order to create something suitable for her experiments, and it's some neon blue sludge

I'm certain that Secunda would be the type of person to say 'the armor stays on during sex.' None of it is in the way of such activities, after all. Look at this outfit. She's not wearing a bra, the line of her underwear is exposed, all only covered by flimsy-looking fabric.

"For an experiment, I drank 10 cups of expresso. But that's strange, I don't feel anything compared to our normal neural stimulants."

Failed at a diplomatic conversation so poorly that the other person ran away from her to save face and struggled to understand what she had done wrong.

Infodumps about different kinds of poisons

Considerably overdone her application, not realizing that such an extensive history of herself would freak out the other person.

and finally

She is definitely pulling Irene here lmao

After of course she gave her the cold shoulder initially and didn't understand why she was disappointed.

Arknights Blorbissimo Series