#unconfrontational

Dear Nash,

I still barely slept. Last night around 1 AM you blew up my phone saying you need me and you’re willing to fix this... I’m so confused with how to feel.

I remember a few years ago when I was hurt by my parents’ rocky relationship, I would vent to you all the time. You told me you’d love me through the pain, and we could get through anything together. So why couldn’t you love me through the pain last week? Why did you run away? 

I’m not sure what God’s plan is for us together, but I hope He speaks to me soon.

But, early this morning you told me, after years of waiting to hear this, you wouldn’t let me hold you back from any scholarships you receive. You deserve to put yourself first, and no matter what, if we are meant to be, distance won’t be an issue. 

I know we have to take things really slow, but I’m grateful you came back. None of your boys will really understand what we have, it isn’t you being whipped or a sucker. It’s neither. Maybe we are too used to eachother, or maybe our path together isn’t over, our point hasn’t broken. 

I could be messaging you this, but I don’t want to cause a fight.

Writing here is serene.