Trying to force myself out this Saturday night.. We’ll see.. Lol
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Trying to force myself out this Saturday night.. We’ll see.. Lol

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Sometimes I think back to when we first met, just a few weeks in, maybe a month. We were sitting in my apartment taking, getting to know each other. I started to take my shoes off and out of nowhere you asked “Do you have ugly feet? You always keep your socks on in the house.” I was taken aback, you had zeroed in on a lifetime insecurity like a master archer on their target. I was hesitant to respond & you caught that too, “What’s wrong with your feet”, you asked. Mortified and not wanting to respond I said, “I just hate my second toe. My brother always made fun of me growing up so I’m insecure about it.” Not skipping a beat, and without consideration for my obvious discomfort, empathy for a childhood insecurity, or shame in your lack of boundaries, you said, “take your socks off, I need to see what I’m dealing with here.” I didn’t want to take my socks off. I didn’t want to be having that conversation. But I did and you laughed, saying my feet were totally normal. That you had seen some ugly feet but mine were fine and that my brother was an idiot…
I never forgot that night. How quickly you picked up on my insecurity. How unabashedly you called it out and the lack of regard for how uncomfortable it made me. I didn’t realize then how this ability of yours would present itself throughout our time together; how it would harm or how it would uplift. And to this day, I still don’t know if its something I appreciate or dislike about you but I do know I no longer feel the need to keep my socks on in the house..
Lost my sweet baby boy today. 💔 He was my first fur-baby & the sweetest lil man ever. We went through a lot these last 12 years. Im missing him so much already. Life will never be the same. Love you forever, lil man. 💔 See you on the other side.
Watching someone you once loved destroy themselves and become unrecognizable is its own particular kind of sad. Half of you wants to help, comfort, or show them there’s a better way, but the other half knows you cannot; you must protect yourself and do what’s best for you.
I know others have been in this position with me, but experiencing it myself a decade into my own recovery is eye-opening.
Song · 2022 · Duration 4:14
It'll be fine by dusk light I'm tellin' you, baby
These things eat at your bones and drive your young mind crazy
But when you place your head between my collar and jaw
I don't know much but there's no weight at all
And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't
'Cause if I say I miss you I know that you won't
But I miss you in the mornings when I see the sun
Somethin' in the orange tells me we're not done
To you I'm just a man, to me you're all I am
Where the hell am I supposed to go?
I poisoned myself again
Somethin' in the orange tells me you're never comin' home
I need to hear you say you've been waitin' all night
There's orange dancin' in your eyes from bulb light
Your voice only trembles when you try to speak
Take me back to us dancin', this wood used to creak

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
“Many people are good to me. Many hate me. But there are some out there who know that I'm truly some kind of simple soul caught in a wild gamble, they know me, they know that I sit between these walls, they know I've been burned, and that I still laugh.”
Charles Bukowski
Oh hi 👋🏼
😍 My handsome assistant. 🥰