#ulveham

Eurovision Song Contest + Costumes

Gunnhild Sundli of Gåte's green, black & golden dress when performing Ulveham for Norway in the 2024 contest.

The other one is obviously the genocide poster child, I'm not posting her but, yeah, unfortunately she made it.

06. NORWAY Gåte - "Ulveham" 26th place

Decade ranking: 25/190

Italy were not the only country to break character in 2024. Norway is well underway towards becoming one of my least favourite countries in this decade, on the basis of increasedly insulting clown car nonsense.

It looked particularly bad in MGP 2024, which appeared to have a two-horse race for the win (and bottom 3 on my ranking) between Gaute from Subwoolfer dressed up like a passive-aggressive super hero robot, and some washed-up losers (forgot their name) bringing a damn' diggity dogturd. Great, I think I'll just KMS, ty.

AND then... all of a sudden... a miracle:

NAKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU HEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE E. E. E. E.

HOOO-O-O-O-O-O-O OOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

What an entrance. Away went any reservations I had (and I had them because it's MGP), replaced by the classic OBSESSION AT FIRST SIGHT. 😍😍😍 A scream queen demonstrating the best ever use of a turntable while singing a brutalistic folklore tale, chorus full of lupine vocalizations YES!!!! ALL THE YESSES in the world for the Turbo Strazdas!!!

Of course, my affection for Gåte fully blinded me towards their impending doom because um yeah, "Ulveham" was a total fanwank. OOPS!!!

But to be fair, the song still slaps regardless? The music, the vocals, the build-up, the presentation. The whole package is works and I felt like the appeal was mega obvious?? Why would this not work for Gåte, at least in miniature, when it worked for Go_A? Entries like THESE, that blend folklore with culture and art, are the true heart and soul of Eurivision, not the camp-written teacher pet entries, nor the generic radio pop, nor the insultingly stupid tiktok-coded brainrot that keeps seeping into the contest at an alarming rate. 'Ulveham' is so Norwegian it could be banana on pizza, or a physical manifestation of self-deprication. It should be up there among the greats alongside 'Shum', 'Spirit in the Sky', 'Voila', 'Amar Pelos Dois' and other anthems that embody this principle.

Last place is an infuriating result for what it was, and one of the few misses in the year, fanwank or not. Retroactively it made sense though. It's a difficult song to get into, being sung in medieval Norwegian, with a fully vocalized chorus. Also, the camera work was shit. Why. were. there. so. many. wide. shots. during. the. good. bits?

And of course the final took place amidst the Joost Apocalypse where an Israel televote victory, and the death of Eurovision that would come with it, were looming threats on the horizon, and therefore all plans needed to be abandoned so that Croatia and Switzerland could snag a win.

Regardless of result, Norway delivered a very fun and bold entry that broke the mold and of course Europe's uncultured voting public -the same that would later vote the vile Tommy Cash into second place- paid them for dust. As a wise woman once said, the fans of this show are pieces of shit.

The least I can do, as a small indie ranker, is give them the placement they deserve.

🇳🇴 In #Norway, the frontrunners for their #ESC2024 selection Melodi Grand Prix, Gåte must change the lyrics to their song, as it contains text from a medieval ballad. Do you think the change is justified? Do you think Gåte can still go to #Eurovision?

Melodi Grand Prix frontrunners Gåte have come under fire as their song’s lyrics have been revealed o be taken from a 1,000 year old folk song. What is happening? Gåte, qualified from Heat 2 of Melodi Grand Prix, and are currently the bookies’ favourites to win the competition. Their song, “Ulveham” is based on a traditional norwegian kulokk, a traditional form of music historically used to…

Norge ikväll 😭❤️🇳🇴 Åt och lämnade inga smulor kvar! Visste att den skulle bli omtyckt. Måtte den gå vidare för Sverige får inte rösta ikväll 😢.

🤘🏼👅