Another snippet and yes the dove is dead and try not eat it.

Warnings - Gore, Child death, death, Dead dove things and stuff

It was a horrific scene that was sitting before you. The two babies you had raised laid within their own gore. Throats ripped out and terrified sunken eyes looking back at you. You didn't want to look but you couldn’t rip your eyes away from the scene before you. Your baby girl got it the worst, her body protectively lying in front of her baby brother. Her organs were pouring out of her tummy and her face was hardly recognizable with the amount of lacerations that were ingrained in her once perfectly soft skin. One of her beautiful golden brown eyes hung out of its socket, an arm outstretched as if reaching out for her mommy who wasn’t there. You could only imagine the fear that ran through her tiny body before she died. A loud mourningful sob escaped your mouth. You were shaking uncontrollably as you fell to your knees. You reach your hands out wanting to comfort the gore that was your baby girl. You stopped just short as your eyes traveled to your baby boy, only 6. The sight wasn’t much better, his throat was torn apart, his head struggling to stay attached to his body. Only some ligaments and skin fighting to keep it all together. You opened your mouth to speak only for a sorrowful gasp to leave your mouth, an ocean couldn't compare to the tears leaving your body.

Scooping up your children you laid on the floor cradling them.The red almost black liquid quickly spreading onto the fabric of your evening dress. “Mommys here now.” You cried but it was far too late for those words to mean a damn thing. 

I think i want to be offline a bit longer...

Memories are coming back and everything hurts

I might be back tomorrow idk...

I just

Feel disgustinf and ugly rn

And used

I dont want to elaborate so please donr make me

THE DODOS ARE PLAYING IN ELEMENTARY

I don't know if I'm going to get this application done by Monday, which is the cut-off date for it (I only got it in the mail yesterday! Gimme a break guys!!)

It requires me to find all my qualification certificates (that's 16 seperate pieces of paper or card which could be FUCKING ANYWHERE), decide which ones are relevant to the job (is my degree relevant to admin? Not specifically, but it proves I can use a fucking computer which IS relevant. So if I put it on there are they gonna think I'm stupid, or not...?)

It requires me to find references (I have one... sort of. My others are sort of iffy. I'm not sure one of the women who agreed to be one even works for the company anymore because when I was working with her over a year ago she was wanting to quit.... and since it's the weekend even if she DID still work there she won't be around for me to check until Monday itself)

It also requires me to account for periods of unemployment in detail. As if "I was unemployed" is an unacceptable answer to employers... they expect periods when you're out of work to be due to BABIES or DEATH or EDUCATION or something crap like that... God forbid you live in the real world where NO ONE WILL FUCKING HIRE YOU

And of course it wants a nice fat essay on why they should hire me. Never mind that there's no job spec online, and the one they've included is rather poor.

It's also surprisingly hard to train my eyes to home in on the english text amongst the welsh.