#tsxdiary

[[ There are a ton of flowers and vines scrawled in the margins of the pretty pink diary paper. It's apparent Nina has ether procrastinated writing or is shelled in deep thought. Take your pick. ]]

As I grow older, I find that birthdays are of little importance to me. Its been that way ever since I was nine, long after Ann's father gave me a doll for my birthday one year. .. Not to say I hated that particular day with all my passions (I did hate those years prior, though, and I am sorry), but it has opened my eyes to birthdays in general.

I remember being younger, when it was just Momma and I. I grew up without a father and I remember every birthday wish blowing out numerous candles entailing that I would get to meet him someday. I know now (as I have learned with age) the only way I'll get to see him is in another lifetime. It kind-of makes me sad, but I shouldn't be sad; I should be grateful that I am here and able to do what I love. <3

... On a silly whim, I've never had a surprise party -- just surprise things that I treasure with all my heart. Momma always did her best and there's never a day in which I don't appreciate her. She makes the best cake -- though I get a feeling she orders from Ellen's mother from time to time! Their cakes taste so identical, especially the vanilla ones.. Somehow, I think it's coincidence...Funny, yes? Hee-hee-hee. <3

... Would I want a surprise party? No. I prefer the way things are and hope they stay that way forever. Call me orthodox. .. I know times and things change, though, but if the earth could let me have this one moment for a couple more years...

.....

Well, I think that's enough for now. It's time to start work. Til next time~!

I'm so excited. I must spend my time preparing for the return. Everyone will be together, right? We'll be happy, right?

...

Seems like forever since I've written in this stupid thing...but okay. 20 facts about me:

Dear beloved,

I picked up a few treats for Tank and Whiskers today. I've got to make some room to go and drop it off at the apartment. I'm sure Tank's being a big baby again anyway.

I keep getting distracted lately and I don't know why...I have to keep my head straight. The year's going to be over in 3 months and I have to plan a new course of attack for the coming year. The last ride has been added to this Funland, so maybe I should be thinking about expanding...?

I've decided to quit calling this a 'diary.' Diaries are for women and I am not a woman. I suppose such is irrelevant, though.

Today, I received flowers. You'd think me being a florist I'd grow sick of them, but....

.....

I love flowers. They're so full of life and vibrance. They are truly the soul of nature. Those who believe otherwise are entitled to their opinion, of course.

......

[( There are a lot of illegible scratches and scuff marks near the top of the entry, as though Cam didn't know about what to write or was unsure about a certain topic. In fact, this goes on for awhile until, finally, words take shape. )]

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Something has been bothering me as of late, other than the rampant heat outside. Oddly enough, I am not sure what it is. I get little inklings that something huge is about to happen, but, at the same time, I tell myself that it's just mere blasphemy. Nothing out of the ordinary happens in Bluebell and I prefer it stay that way.

On a happier note, the flowers have survived well in the summer's relentless grip. With winter forthcoming, I need to devise my usual plans of keeping them alive through icy nights.

September 14, 2014

That is today's date. In Chelsea's room, there is a waste basket with nothing in it but a crumbled paper, a snotty tissue, and a few other pieces of trash. You pick up the less gross and more obvious item, and smooth it out on the desk. It is a letter with no date. How long she has had it or how long it has been in the trash exactly is impossible to tell. It is written in ink, smudged from a hand that had been scribbling words. Thankfully, for you, her handwriting is very neat anyway.