#tslog

We got our assignment finished and submitted this evening. With that, I am officially done with uni!

The hotel internet decided to crap out for a full 10 minutes in the middle of my call with my assignment partner. That seems to just happen sometimes, and whenever I try to video call anyone the quality is horrible. Definitely looking forward to getting home to my reliable internet and my main PC. The laptop does the trick but boy oh boy is it inconvenient and uncomfortable in comparison to my setup at home. And slow. These poor fans are working overtime.

I debated buying myself a beer to celebrate finishing uni, but I think I’d just feel sad drinking alone in my hotel room. And I don’t particularly want to sit alone at a bar either. So I’ll save up my celebrating for when I get home and I can do it with my friends and family.

I’ve been really drained today. Having been pretty isolated for the last few weeks, being around so many people yesterday really took it out of me. The introversion is in desperate need of recharging.

And I missed the nurses yesterday. I never know when they’re going to arrive, so I couldn’t really plan around it, and they came while I was out yesterday. The nurse today mentioned it, but there’s not much I can do about it aside from never leaving my room, so y’know. Sorry I left my room that one day.

Guess who went out today and forgot to take any pictures!

A friend of the family is currently in Thailand recovering from a different surgery, and today we were both recovered enough to go out. It was good to get out of the hotel, now I can at least say I went shopping like a proper tourist!

We went to this huge... not a mall exactly, more a sort of market, but indoors. A market crossed with a mall maybe, I’m not sure exactly how to classify it. It had some regular stores and cafes and stuff, but there was also street food stalls and little touristy souvenir shops and stuff. We just wandered around for a few hours browsing whatever caught our fancy.

Bartering is a thing here, and I am terrible at it. I always feel guilty about asking for a lower price, and the whole social interaction feels uncomfortable and a little combative. It’s not how things work in New Zealand. Thankfully, my friend knows what she’s about, so she handled all the haggling for me. She told me off a couple times for looking to excited about an item, which made it harder for her to get the price down. It’s all too complicated for me! But I wound up with a wooden elephant head that I can put on the wall next to the wooden giraffe head I got in Bali, and a coconut bowl inlaid with mother of pearl as a gift for my mum. Souvenirs purchased, mission accomplished. (Like these top surgery scars aren’t souvenir enough!)

We went to a maid cafe for lunch, which was a very bizarre experience. My friend picked it, and I’m not sure if she knew what it was. With the girls all dressed up and the rules we got taken through when we sat down about not touching them, not taking photos etc, I felt a little bit creepy, like a voyeur or something. But I sat with my back to the rest of the room and just focused on chatting with my friend and enjoying the food, so it wasn’t too bad. And now I can say I’ve been to a maid cafe I guess...

Trying to find a taxi home was a bit of a mission. Apparently, taxi drivers will try to get away with not using the meter, and then they can tell you a much higher price that you can’t really dispute, because there’s no meter price to back you up. We had to try several different drivers before we found someone who agreed to use the meter, and all the interactions were the same kind of combativeness as haggling. I never would have managed on my own, I would have just accepted what they told me and gotten wildly ripped off.

★ 𝙾𝚌𝚝 𝟹𝟶, 𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟸 ★

Day 14

I think I’ve started from a pretty good post-surgery base, so there’s not much visible progress. I didn’t really get any bruising. I do have some swelling in the center and on my right side, but it’s only really noticeable to me because I can see it from the top. You can’t really tell from the front or sides.

I’m getting the odd little tingle in various places across my chest that can feel a bit unsettling, but I know it’s just my body doing healing stuff. I can sleep on my side now with no trouble. I just have to be aware of how I’ve wrapped my binder, because if the velcro line is on the side I’m lying on it can sort of dig in uncomfortably.

My incisions wrap a fair way around my sides towards my back, but truly I do not mind at all. From the start I was never that worried about how the scars would look, I have plenty of other scars and marks that are part of me. They are all a part of my story, my history, part of what has shaped me into who I am. Even the ones that came from negative experiences, I have learned to accept and to love. Without them, I would be somebody different. And I’ve worked too hard to become who I am now to resent the things that have brought me here.

Woops, got onto a bit of a tangent there, sorry folks. The point is, these scars could be far worse and I would still be happy.

I’ve spent most of today working on a university assignment. I’m working on it with one other person, and it’s the last piece of uni work I need to do to finish my degree. Once it’s submitted I’ll be done with uni, and I’ll never have to go back! I’m so ready to not have uni deadlines constantly looming over me.

This morning the nurses removed the rest of the tape from my incisions. It was starting to come off by itself now that I’ve had a few showers, so it came off without any tugging. It was the first time we’ve been able to directly see the incisions, and they look pretty clean. The nurses are happy with them, and so am I. I was expecting them to look a little more... gnarly, I guess? To be more red, or wider, or more raised or something, I don’t know. But they’re just these clean lines, I’m so pleased.

I spent most of today drawing and watching Twitch. It’s really pleasant sitting in the sun in my room, I get all the happiness of feeling the sun on my skin while not overheating because the air conditioning is on 24/7. Sometimes it’s the little things.