#tscrossroads

...it is the Abandoned Arcade.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8S2IBP0obk

"Ummm hi" aka THE SHOT AT THE PATRIARCHY HEARD ROUND THE WORLD http://ww2.kqed.org/pop/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/2016/11/tumblr_odagiuxFeT1smwl44o3_500.gif The men really tried it on my birthday like I knew they would so can't say I'm surprised. @ the men aka The Board Room: if I'm a goat what are y'all? Or do y'all mean G.O.A.T. cause I deceived you into believing I wasn't taking notes or stacking jury votes?? Not to mention making one of the biggest moves of the game while outnumbered with no immunity wins??? I finessed my way into Final 4 on pure strategy and talent y'all could never https://media.giphy.com/media/l41Yh4vr9mSNE13FK/giphy.gif Shoutout to Jake for giving me his idol half, the second most feminist thing to happen all game. He could've rolled with the boys club and let his idol half go to waste but instead he gave me room to be iconic, helped decide Final 4, and (probably) just secured his spot in Final 3. Speaking of which, whose turn is it to  get cut? Karma's kissing booth ain't closed yet

Ok so immunity is upon us and I've never won individual immunity so I'm trying to win anyway BUT if there was ever one that I needed to win it's this one because..... I think some anarchist fuckery is about to go down. If I'm wrong we can all laugh about it, but if I'm right?? Give me my damn clout- ok cool here go Owen has been intentionally cryptic about FTC and everyone is very unsure. At Final 6 tribal everyone except me and Sam said they wanted Final 3; I said why I wanted Final 2 and Owen was like mmmm ok that's interesting. Now that Owen has been saying "one more episode" and "the big finale" we all think it's Final 3, but in last night's tribal there was this you-never-know-we'll-see vibe. Soooo *I believe the winner of tonight's immunity will get to decide whether it's Final 2 or Final 3.* That's very crackdt but that makes it very on brand for Crossroads and very much something Owen would do

As a chaotic good, IM LIVING!!!! But this could get sooooo wild. I told Jake so he'll actually fight for his life tonight but I'm shooketh. I'm probably wrong but boy oh boy if I'm right. Am I really about to write out everyone's ideal Final 2/Final 3 like I've written out everyone's potential jury votes and FTC arguments? Absolutely why wouldn't I

You can view Autumn’s decision making process when she had to choose F3 or F2 here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgB1gjq1HSk&feature=youtu.be

I’m pushing for Dane to go this round. I’ve seen him as the biggest threat to win for a while now and I don’t want to sit in the end with him. John was on board right away, and Autumn wasn’t at first but today she told me she wants to. I hope that they’re being honest. Right after Autumn won immunity, Dane called me and said that he wanted to vote John out. He also offered me a final 2 because he says that “we” have the best chance sitting next to each other in the end. Ummm, i think you mean YOU have the best chance against me. At this point I think that i’ll have the best chance against John. Dane is a threat because he’s played so well, and me and Autumn have the same allies but all of our allies were on Imperium and I believe that she’ll get their votes. 

Okay whew so about that last vote. That was wild as fuck. My plan was to strike a deal with Ryan and say “hey if I vote out Autumn this round, then would you be down to vote out John the next?” and honestly I didn’t really care whether or not he followed that plan through. I knew Ryan was never going to vote me out, so had it been Jake, Ryan, John, and I in the final 4 I could have had Ryan vote out John or Jake, and then Jake vote out either John or Ryan. I was set up to easily get to F3 and then Autumn ruined that. okay whew now speaking of Autumn. Sis is delusional. Have you read her rites of passages!? She thinks she’s the next Cirie but she up there looking like fucking Missy from SJDS. Yes, she has a lot of friends in jury and I don’t want to face her in the now f2, but she didn’t do anything fldmfmvmvmc. Now to get to F2 is tricky. I would love to get to final 2 with Jake, but these people are so anti-social. Jake and Autumn told me that they’re voting John but last round I just flipped on them??? And I know Autumn wants me out?? So why would I just openly believe that. Earlier today I decided to call John up and say that Jake is voting for him and I proposed an F2 with John. This way in the case that Jenn City— I mean Autumn, and Jake want to make a move on me, I can at least assure myself a tiebreaker challenge with John as my vote. 

Dane spent all afternoon being passive aggressive in my pm's, implying I was fake and untrustworthy and then said "Congrats to Jake, John, and Jenn City" on his way out. Bitch call me by name and put some respect on it. Cause let's get real- if any guy this season played the exact same game as me, they would be a legend and Dane would worship the ground they walk on. But since it's me, apparently my game sucked, all I did was float, and get carried here by everyone else. Inch resting

 Ok I said I was gonna win out but I didn't think it would actually happen?!? VL AM I REALLY SENDING THREE WHITE MEN IN A ROW TO JURY!!! AND GOING TO FTC WTF!?! 2018 JUST started and I'm wigless. Thank you to that 14 iconic teams who drafted me!! I hope I've given you one helluva season. But highkey I gotta thank my dad Duncan for bringing me into the community two months ago and Junior for convicing me to apply to Crossroads. I can't believe I did that and am about to make history in the series (again) whew God is so good https://media.giphy.com/media/TZ388aYpsLMcM/giphy.gif Also me, a Patriots fan from Atlanta, muting the game to focus on the comp and now they're going to the Super Bowl and I'm going to FTC? True story what a day

Winning immunity AGAIN and securing a spot in the Final 2 option I created?? Not bad for a girl with no gameplay https://media.giphy.com/media/aMgVBrc9CoGhW/giphy.gif This is so surreal I always pop off too soon in Survivor and get sent out immediately after. Now I'm aaaaalll the way up. I did that challenge for 117 minutes, 20+ minutes of which I was just fumbling through because I didn't know we could use the wiki or the blog lmao. And then the last 20+ minutes I still had 7 people's names left to use so if y'all are shook imagine how I feel. Muting the Patriots game really paid off huh (THEY DID THAT TOO whew I love my team so much). Honestly voting John a 4th time and final time is the most on brand thing I can do. John has done the absolute most and has put all but 3 people in jury;  he's got just as many friends on jury as me and I can't have that. Jake knows waaaay too much tea to go into jury feeling betrayed and bitter, not to mention we have the same enemies and allies so this FTC outta be good. I stan loyalty above all so as much as I love my new friendship with John, I gotta take Jake. Ok but I really took down the uglies, the Board Room, and the meninists round by round like I set out to revenge has never been sweeter https://i.pinimg.com/originals/bc/60/3e/bc603e5702534382b0d04de5de64eb92.gif

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3mF9Fn1EqA

John and Autumn are both tough competitors to beat in the finals, but my preference was for me to win so I could go against John because I feel like me and Autumn will have the same support but our allies have been closer to here which makes me nervous. So of course she wins the final immunity! Good for her though bc that challenge was tough as hell LMAO. anyways she basically told me after that before she thought that she wanted to take me out for being a comp beast and having the best story, but after i talked to her and told her how much of a threat John was in the end, she said it’s an 80% chance that she takes me to finals. shrhdjjdjdjrrn well i’m gonna talk to her again before votes are due to plea one more time. Really hoping that I can convince Autumn to take me to the end  

HI!!! Please tune in to Crossroads FTC tonight at 11:30 pm EST. I will be welcoming everyone into my Caucasian home, clocking them for calling me a goat/sheep/all the names I don't even know about, and outlining why I'm a legend. So stay up cause I will 100% deliver- I saved my best scamming for last! https://i.pinimg.com/originals/bc/60/3e/bc603e5702534382b0d04de5de64eb92.gif

Shoutout to everyone who watched me flop in FTC lmao we love good ratings. I can't stop replaying all the ways I got clocked it's gonna be an awesome next 20 hours   https://78.media.tumblr.com/7560b08c098fd09f905c4eed917d807e/tumblr_inline_o1e0g7mk7a1rqinb4_500.gif Also pray for me since the results will drop in the middle of my work shift haha. NOT THAT IT MATTERS CAUSE JAKE PROBABLY WON

Final confessional, wow. So I'm glad that Autumn took me to the end and I'm pretty impressed with myself because she told me that she didn't plan on taking me until I convinced her otherwise. Final Tribal Council was intense, thankfully no one was bitter. But explaining my game was a bit nerve wracking because I can't tell if people respect it enough to vote for me over Autumn. But it's over and now all I can do is wait. Regardless of the outcome I'm so happy with the way I played this game and I'm happy that my first tumblr survivor got to be Crossroads, it was filled to the brim with amazing castaways who were all fighting hard to win and I loved the challenge! Thank you again for casting me Owen <3 <3 <3 

Ugh, I wanted Dane to go home but that didn't work. It sucks that I lost Sam, but I have to keep moving forward and be thankful that it wasn't me. Ryan is going to target me for sure so I need to solidify by bonds with the others. I also need to win this idol half so that I'll have a full idol at the final 5 tribal.

Sam is gone and I can't even cry cause I spent all my tears on the other half of Imperium. That's ok though! Everyone mark your calendars because a man is entering jury on Thursday, January 18th, 2018 and he goes by the name of Ryan Matthew. He relentlessly targeted that unproblematic white girl for no reason, he's going around saying in the tribe chat that he's already won but if not he'll be GinaMarie (BB2) of our season, and he's super cavalier about voting all the girls and Imperium out. But I got news for him: you missed a spot https://68.media.tumblr.com/f2d1927e398ff752872a699dab9a505e/tumblr_on0nr20yjt1tyvan0o6_250.gif

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNMbV4E0kwE

Sam!!! Sweetie I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that a ugly ass bitch like this would even say (and do) that oh my God. You deserved better and I'm sorry we couldn't dismantle the patriarchy together. Is it weird that I'm lowkey jealous? You're reunited with all the cool kids and I'M STUCK IN THIS UGLY GAME WITH CRACKED WHITE MEN AND IM TIRED. Sooooo catch me doing my finest gameplay and scamming to date https://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/thumbor/xPEXBaRNZPJScRVbvEBmqz-oDlU/fit-in/1024x1024/filters:format_auto-!!-:strip_icc-!!-/2016/11/14/049/n/1922398/58dc16d4f9fec55b_giphy-1/i/When-You-Invite-Tinder-Cutie-Over.gif Honestly  I'm just sitting here lamenting what a shit show this season was and how alone I am. Honestly though? The boys still love me even though I do nothing but talk shit and take turns voting them out; for the life of me Idk why they never got rid of me but that's their game flaw not mine. Anyway I'm sick of Ryan and my biggest game move will be orchestrating and executing his demise pass it on https://78.media.tumblr.com/d1d04ee30ade1bb4fc2e53278a71aeb0/tumblr_inline_ool9tlpotT1qmpins_500.gif

I mean it's January 18th and I told y'all I'd send Ryan to jury soooo we been knew. Also shoutout to my partner in crime Jake for that idol half- I stan men who support women over their boys club. Whew what a birthday! https://media1.tenor.com/images/44632e93252c81fa142752e1cb333430/tenor.gif?itemid=5025441 

LOL. I'm not mad at tribal. Haley and John trusted Jake. I sure the fuck didn't. I've made finals twice and won this game for a reason. I ran the numbers in my head and it makes no sense for him to pick our side, when the other has more cracks. I wanted to play an idol on me and an idol on Haley. They were feeding us John's name and then Jake's which were total bullshit?? Like c'mon you fucking amateurs. 

Now Haley went home with half an idol (or the full thing?) and I wasted mine. I'm glad I played it because I felt alone. I wanted to protect myself. John and Haley, more so Haley, put more effort into talking to Jake and others to figure out tribal than to talk to me. I wanted them to both give me their idol halves so I could protect them incase something happened (like it did). Now I have to win my way to the end xoxo.

Fucking Ryan just ruined my perfect game I'm mad as hell. But not really because little does he know I was the one who disadvantaged him in immunity haha. And yes, yes I did write that iconic voting confessional lmao you already know. But anyway WHEW I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T GO OUT IN A 5-2 BLINDSIDE!!!!! Me making Final 6? There really is a first time for everything. Thank you thank you thank you to everyone supporting me!!! 

Omg I'm still here and this game has turned upside down for me. I have been on the outside of the votes for most of merge, but last night really threw the other side for a loop. We got Haley out AND we got Ryan to waste his idol. Now it's me, Autumn, Dane, and Jake on one side and then Ryan and John on the other. I'm very happy that we could finally pull this off. Another thing I am excited for is me and Autumn both found a HIDDEN IDOL HALF! Me and Autumn have an idol together and nobody suspects it! Jake knows I got an idol half, but he got a public idol half, so he assumes that I would pair mine with him. This is great though because now me and Autumn have an idol without even needing Jake's help. I'm so happy for me and Autumn, I don't see her flipping on me. If she does, I don't know what I would do. Immunity is tonight and I'm hoping I win. Because even though we have majority, some people still think I'm a threat and when the numbers get down this low, people are going to stop thinking about majority for votes and start thinking about who they can beat in the end. It's hard, because as much as I think I have played a good game, I feel like the only jury votes I would get so far would be Ned and Bryan. I need to step it up and do something other than defy the odds that were against me in the beginning of merge. I'm very curious about immunity tonight, but I'm nervous bc live comps give me anxiety.

If I never have to talk to Ryan after this, I will be 100% fine. You know, I'll be better than fine. I'll be great, happy, literally any positive emotion. I’m just so annoyed how Ryan is literally trying to manipulate me in pms. Saying it’s my fault we are against each other right now bc I acted a certain way ever since the Bryan vote. If I would have just asked him how he felt, I could have avoided it but since I only cared about myself, our relationship can’t be mended. I’m sorry but isn’t Ryan the one who told me 3 rounds ago “I’m not voting with you, we can try next round” AND THEN NEVER MESSAGED ME AGAIN. And when I told him I disagree with how he perceived the situation, he equated it to me telling him that his feelings were invalid. Do not try to pull this over on me. I don’t know what his intention was when he messaged me, but if he started with “I don’t think our relationship can be fixed” I see no point in having a conversation. Going back and forth with him is draining and honestly the more I talk to him, the more angry I get. He will most likely write my name tonight. John said he was voting Dane, but John doesn't have a brain of his own, he will do what Ryan says. I believe we have the numbers between me, autumn, jake and dane to vote for John. The only thing that scares me is if John has an idol. And they have really played up this idea that he gave his only idol half to Haley and she left with it, but if he played something, I would not at all be surprised. I need to get John out this round and then Ryan out next round. I would like my two alliances in final 4. I'm nervous bc I don't know if I have played a winning game, but I just can't let John or Ryan get anywhere near the end. It'll be hard for any of us to get votes if either of them is in there. Most of the jury hates us and worked with them. I know I say this before every tribal, but I really hope I'm not going home.

Ok bitch this round is fucking me up everyone wants to vote John but I know he has the idol bc he gave it to me last round and I felt obligated to give it back to him but omfg ryan is crazy he tried to come for me right away now idk what he's doing and John wants to do Dane which I'm fine with but Dane knows he's being fucking targetted and I'm scared he has the idol and RYAN IS JUST I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING BUT HE'S PISSING ME OFF!!!! I don't feel safe. I don't know what's going to happen with all these idols and potential liars lord jesus save me

Yay! Haley left! But now Ryan won and its stressing me out to trust Sam, Autumn, and Jake to all vote John with me. I'm really concerned on whether or not to play my idol or save it for f5. I'm being told that I'm safe, but these are all people that I've lied to before and people who perceive me as a threat. However, I've been working hard on building a stronger relationship with Autumn and Jake and I hope they're being truthful to me. For the final 5 I definitely feel like I'm in a spot that people would need me and if they take me out this round, they're really fucking up. I feel like my main point is trying to drive the point of an F2 to these people, especially Jake and the fact that Ryan and John are a duo and Sam and Autumn are a duo. This will probably be my last tribal council but I've had fun playing xoxoxo

IM GONNA IDOL SOMEONE OUT TN HOPEULLY MORE DETAILS IN A VID I CANT UPLOAD YET

Lmao so I accidentally got confused and told Dane that Ryan was voting him when it was actually John hahaha. So now Ryan is pissed and feels like I can't be trusted and all I have to say is: welcome to Final 5. He really thought I was goat and came in my pm's like "if John goes you're my Final 2 whether you want it or not." At the time I was thinking lol ok I'll win 6-3 that works, but now I'm over it. He's gotten in a fight with Sam today, talked shit about Dane to Jake, talked shit about Jake to Dane, and talked shit about me to Jake and Dane. Not that any of it matters because he has no leverage!!! If he doesn't win out, he's going to jury and personally I can't relate because I got friends in jury and friends in Final 5 so unless a twistos twist happens, I'm well on my way to FTC and Ryan woke up too late. The amount of disrespect is staggering. He is not the only one playing the game and anyone who thinks that Autumn Hill is a goat has already lost. 

Ok that was the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of what was supposed to happen and by fucking up drafts I was referring to John Coffey leaving. I don’t even know why I’m still here; everyone sucks but people are counting on me and I just- men are awful. Just when women almost had majority the first time all game. JUST WHEN REBECKA AND I WERE FINALLY WORKING TOGETHER!!!! Himalayas mom and dads I wasn’t apart of that you have to believe me!!!

Dammit dammit dammit https://media.giphy.com/media/aJWbodHJSZ1g4/giphy.gif I'm always blindsided, never the blindsider. Idc who Rebecka's voted in the past that's my sister and I love her AND WE WERE FINALLY ON THE SAME SIDE!!!!! She even apologized about the Ned vote. My Athena parents raised me better than to turn on my sister but clearly John's did not. Fucking John Coffey- he's such a liar and Ryan is a sneak and Haley is both but Chris is probably stopping her from taking me out (thanks fam) but does it even matter?? Because clearly I'm playing for 6th place and headed out the door anyway so what does it even matter. And Jake. FUCKING JAKE. I can't- I thought I could trust him and I forgave him for the Chris thing. But then he goes and does this???? Hey Jake,  piece of advice? Anytime Fatum calls you to talk game DONT PICK UP THE PHONE YOU KNOW THEY'RE ONLY CALLING CAUSE THEY'RE SHADY AND ALONE. You didn't need to make that move right now/ it was a ceasefire!!!! So now aaaaaaalll the hard work me and Sam put in to not be on the bottom AND to give Imperium a majority in this game just went up in flames but Jake sweeeaars he's still with us and he didn't mean to betray us https://78.media.tumblr.com/9a76394ed7ae897087ddb6c1cc1f214a/tumblr_n9hk2t8jdn1sfct0qo4_400.gif I got news for you kid: once an ugly always an ugly

Hiiii you can catch me sweating out all my organs if I don't win this immunity cause I always go home in a 5-2 blindside :)

Hmmm okay. Dane won immunity this round which didn't really phase me because I wanted to wait until the f6 to strike at him anyways, but this takes away a target from the Fatum 3. It was way too quiet after immunity results and I felt like something was off, so I talked to Dane and he told me that the Fatum 3 told him that I was pushing for him before he won immunity. So mama snapped and told him that they were the ones who were pushing him to go, and he told me that he believed me. Even though I like John, I have to lie to him this round. I'm scared of going into the final 6 with the Fatum 3 in tact, because I think that they will all choose each other over me, and all their work to get on my good side seems to be just for a temporary alliance. It sucks being the lone Optio in between 3 fatum and 3 imperium. I hope that Sam and Autumn are more loyal to me than they are to Dane since he flipped on Ned round one, but who knows. Our hope is that Haley is the least likely to get idoled if they have one. I don't know what I'm going to do after this. I want Dane out next but Ryan says he has an idol and who knows if Sam or Autumn would want to vote him out. 

Ok I just wrote the longest confessional and it all disappeared so I'm angry and now my replacement confessional will be much shorter, sorry about it. So Jake flipped on me and Autumn last round. He voted out Rebecka, after we worked so hard to bring her to our side. Me and Autumn were pissed but we realized we have to do 2 things. 1 we have to make jake think we aren't mad and he is our f3 still. Because if we show any signs of distrust, he won't help us anymore. And 2. We need to solidify something with Dane. We made an alliance chat and it's been going really well so far. Jake and Dane came up with a plan to stage a fight in the tribe chat, so that it looks like my side is distancing ourselves from Jake. This will hopefully cause Ryan to confide more in Jake, who will hopefully turn around and tell us what the other side is planning. I'm pretty sure they're writing down my name tonight, and I don't have an idol. I'm relying on him to be loyal to me on this one. I want to vote Ryan, because the more I think about it, the bigger a threat he is. He got both Dane and Jake to flip on me to vote with him. That would be a huge statement if he was against me in FTC. As much as I want Ryan out though, I think he still has an idol. We tried to get him to flush it last round by voting out John instead, but since Jake flipped, he didn't play it. Therefore he probably still has it. So this round we are stuck voting out Haley, hoping Ryan plays his idol on himself. AND hoping Jake votes with us this time. We told Jake that we are telling the other side his name, in case they try to come to him about us. I think with Jake flipping and the fight between the two, it would be somewhat believable. Also, as I am typing this confessional, I am talking to Haley. The convo was very annoying. First she asked about the vote, I told her Jake. She then goes on to complain about feeling on the bottom. BITCH. I have been on the wrong side of most of the merge votes. The only one where I got my way was when I played an idol on myself. So for Haley to be trying to make ME feel sorry for HER! I am heated. Also, Jake just let me know that she used quoted messages from me saying his name. She literally has the worst social game, and I hope she feels on the bottom :) We are all voting her out tonight and I hope it works out. I'm going to be upset if I end up in jury tonight, but at least I'll be reunited with Ned and Bryan. I miss those two soooo much. Also I have these two coins that I have been impatiently waiting to trade in for anything and Owen keeps postponing it! I won't be in this game forever Owen, help me out pls!

This round has been crazy. The twist is definitely big and having a light tribal we can finally see who is truly loyal. Dane is one of the biggest threats and he needs to go. Autumn is just here. Sam is the main target and if everything goes as planned tonight then it will be a 3-3-1 vote and if idols get played then autumn will be the one to go when everyone really wanted sam. Dane is one of the shadiest players. 

People make it clear they talk to me when they've already talked something through with someone else. Haley idoling Jake with John? Already talked about it, when even bother asking me when you know what you want done. Dane, Autumn, Sam haven't talked to me and although I love 2/3 of them I just don't want to be lied to or fake talk today. I think I'm just going to play my idol on myself. I've lied a lot this round to Jake and Dane about them shit talking each other. If Dane sent receipts of me to Jake I could be screwed. I tried to blame it on Dane but... I don't think I was that convincing tbh. And last round Dane hated me because I told Rebecka that Dane wanted Julia out. Go fuck yourself Dane??? like.... you said all day you were going to talk to Rebecka about it, I'm allowed to fucking talk to people about this game without it being shady. I've even told him when he was targeted, I've told him  EVERYTHING and all he does is call me shady. My dream F3 is John and Haley. I suspect a F2 with a jury of 9. 

Okay so I'm over working with Ryan at this point. After the Rebecka vote off I confronted him about how I haven't been able to trust him and the bitch just tries to flip it onto me saying how I'm the untrustworthy one when I literally called him out on lying straight to my face. ALSO Ryan the Rat decided to trust Haley over my word? I've known him for years and Haley can barely keep her eyes open during tribal council, why would he trust anything that Haley says over me? After this conversation he realized that all I've done is try and benefit OUR games while he's been playing selfishly and trying to gather his numbers so he would have people on HIS side instead of our side.... what a bitch. Anyways I won my first every individual immunity challenge in my tumblr survivor career and it secured my best placement in tumblr survivor so I'm REALLY HAPPY!  And I was apparently going to be targeted this round, which isn't surprising considering the amount of titles I got in touchy subjects lkasgmklasdglmsd. So now for tribal council, as much as I would like to get rid of Ryan, the people that I'm working with right now (Jake, Autumn, and Sam) are a fucking mess and can't consistently stick to a plan. They told Haley, Ryan, and John that they're voting out Ryan, John, and even Jake.... like sis.... So I told our side that they're going to be so suspicious of all the names that they threw out so Ryan's going to be playing his idol, most likely on himself or John, so Jake and I came up with the plan to target Haley since she already has a half idol as well and she's the least likely to get targeted in this vote. So I'm Praying by Kesha that the plan to get out Haley goes through xoxoxoxoxoxooxxoxo gossip girl. 

Battle of the side bitches

I really hope that this is the round that we get Julia out. There's one thing that I do not tolerate, and that's people who LIE ON ME. Julia was in on the Ned vote the entire time and wouldn't even own up to it after the vote until I confronted her on it. I went from trusting her the most to not trusting her at all. This round is crucial. From what I've gathered, the other side wants to take out Sam and I can't lose another ally. I need to keep numbers on my side so that I can gain back control in the game. Ryan wants Sam out because she got mad at him on call and apparently made a chat with him the first round of merge and then voted for him. Julia somehow knows that Sam and Autumn are voting for her (probably Ryan) so she wants them out too. It comes down to Dane and John. Dane told me straight up he didn't want to vote Sam out, so I think he's good. But John is being weird. He wants Julia out because I told him she called him shady a bunch of times but he's constantly worrying about what Ryan will think. STOP PLAYING RYAN'S GAME! I need John to side with us regardless if Ryan agrees or not to make this move.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XS5jlv-lEcQ

I think im gonna go pray to the godess an calm down. I honestly feel like im being paranoid. I mean do I trust the 6 alliance anymore? No. Hell no. Do i trust some of them? Yes. Rebecka, haley, an ryan. Autumn has been asking who people are voting, so it makes me think sam may have the idol, or that sam dosen't and autumn just wants to ride majority. So im hoping this is the case. Still nervous but, ya know.

At this point in the merge nothing really exciting is going on anymore it's kinda easy sailing since I'm in majority and then have my own alliance within that one. Jake sam and autumn are just sitting ducks at this point and then the rest pluck one by one 

So last vote was almost a success. I wanted to get to the end without a single vote cast against me, but what can you do when we have bitter betties? Okay so i have 10 minutes so my plan overall right now is to blindside Julia with Rebecka, but Ryan doesn't know that and he's supposed to be my f2 but he was fake to me before tribal council so I'm not trusting him atm. I'm going to pretend that Rebecka isn't flipping and I'm acting defeated that my plan isn't going to work out, but it will. 

Okay so I haven't made a confessional since reward was posted. I was stressed about immunity bc I tied with jake and then I lost the tie breaker, which sucks. But I think I can work something out. I found another half idol so NOW I HAVE A FULL IDOL! I am playing it tonight. I don't know who is voting with me or against me, but I don't think I have the numbers and I am NOT going home with an idol. Ned did it and I would rather waste it than take it to jury. Me Jake Autumn and MAYBE Dane and MAYBE Rebecka are voting Julia, but I'm not confident enough to trust them. Everyone else is voting me so. Also, I need to stop crying about Ned and Bryan. Time to start playing the game. I am ready.

I'm an indecisive mess. 

Okay tribal just happened. I'm sweating a lot. I wasted my idol basically. I did get votes, but only 4 of them. There were 4 for Julia and then I voted for Ryan. If I would have voted for Julia and not played my idol, I would still be here AND have an idol for the future. But since I switched my vote, it tied and then my idol made her go home. It's hard bc a part of me is pissed that I wasted it. But another part of me sees a light in the distance. Autumna and Jake are the only ones who know I voted Ryan. Not even Dane knows. Right now, Coffey and Ryan think it was Rebecka. This hopefully will cause them to trust her less. But Dane's crazy advantage may mess us up right here. There is no immunity. Dane can sit out of tribal tomorrow, be immune, and not cast a vote. Or he can come, vote and potentially be voted out. He told me that he is too busy and he is sitting out, which sucks. Now there will be 7 votes. And I know Haley, John and Ryan won't vote with me. My only hope is Rebecka. And either way, none of those 3 believe that she voted with them. Julia got 4 votes. The obvious solution would be me, jake, autumn, and dane. They would never assume I would throw away a vote to ryan, especially how low I am, numbers-wise. AND there was a voting confessional for Julia (I think Autumn wrote it) but it said "this is for imperium" and i have literally cried to ryan and john about how sad i was seeing ned then bryan go back to back. They most likely think that was me. I think this then created distrust among them and rebecka, so hopefully we can pull her to our side. I think the smartest vote this round will be Ryan. He has had it out for me for a while and he has the closest connections on the other side. Let's face it, he is holding the other side together. John and Haley are not close, but Ryan has been playing both of them against us. I'm stressed whew. I'm lowkey mad at Dane for skipping, but it makes sense for his game so I don't blame him. I just need to work on Rebecka right now. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtkSVB5MpwU

Never thought I'd be able to say this in Crossroads but I'm in the majority and the dog days might be over!!! http://cdn.playbuzz.com/cdn/812ff861-5e39-403c-899c-9e6e33e7d36c/d5504a1c-f8e2-4028-96f6-6b038180e644.gif Highkey told Dane before tribal that I'd hang him out to dry if he flipped back to voting Sam and voted Imperium out for the 3rd time. And we all know I'm cracked enough to deliver soooo we stan tough love haha. He's still cancelled, BUT John and Ryan can enter jury before him/ they already have 3 strikes. I'm so done with John I can't even; he has no backbone and all his does is flop and lie. How are you gonna say we should work together every round and then ghost whenever it's time to vote or when I ask you what's happening? Fakest person in here and he's voted someone Imperium the past 4 rounds; I want him gone so bad but I gotta maximize Dane not being able to vote and put the target on Ryan

 Also y'all saw Owen use his admin powers to blow up my game on camera by reminding everyone that I'm on Imperium and that the tribe has voted out Imperium the past 3 rounds right? OK COOL JUST CHECKING http://i.imgur.com/uN6iEBs.gif So if the tribe speaks this week and I suddenly go to jury, do me a favor and riot cause Owen is rigging for the uglies thanks

My sleeping meds are making me miss this whole game Bc I'm always SLEEP rip 

Everyone is still trash and thus they are still cancelled. Ryan and Haley are pressing me about the vote and I'm like what is there to talk about?? Y'all been coming for my side of camp the past 4 rounds. Flattery will get you nowhere. In other news Rebecka and I are officially on the same side/ working together!! Our parents Duncan, Mitch, and Amanda are probably so proud. Also I think Dane is done flopping and is back to being trustworthy?? But never say never Also John is going home tonight because he can't stop lying, constantly flip flops, doesn't have a backbone, has voted someone Imperium out the past 4 rounds, etc. It's funny cause I like John as a person hahaha; he's just doing too much and he needs the Boardroom's permission to do anything. The Boardroom would be John, Ryan, and Dane because anytime me, Jake, or Sam try to talk game to them, they say "ok I'll talk to the guys" and disappear for 4 hours. Then they come back like "ooh uhhh I don't think Dane/Ryan/John is on board" or "yeah I still don't know what I'm gonna do" when the vote is due in an hour. Anyway, I'm tired of building each round around what The Boardroom may or may not do. NOW LET ME OUT OF THE WOODS DAMMIT IM OWEN https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a4/76/7e/a4767e9175f6fd603aa51d12b23c1ddf.gif

Hi VL!!! Sorry I didn't start talking to y'all until recently because I only recently learned that vl confessionals are a thing that I'm allowed to do lmao. Anyway you guys are in for a treat tonight- people swear they're going home even though they're not getting votes while others aren't even talking to me and I've already used majority to seal their fate. So a lot of games and drafts are getting wreckt tonight and you don't wanna miss it. Watch Crossroads tribal tonight at 10 pm EST!! 

Tribal is happening soon. I'm very nervous. Me, Autumn and Jake originally had a plan to get Ryan out, but apparently he has an idol he wants to use tonight, so we had to switch our target. Hopefully he still plays it. We are voting John out, and Rebecka is telling us she is with us, so hopefully he goes 4-3. Dane isn't voting with us so we can't rely on him to save us this time. Haley came to me earlier and asked me for a name. It was really weird. I know she went to Autumn and Jake as well. I don't know if she truly is desperate in this game or she thinks she can actually get information out of us. We told her Ryan, and she says she will write down any name at this point to not go home. There are 2 scenarios that could happen from this. 1. Haley goes immediately to Ryan, he plays the idol on himself and it is wasted. or 2. She votes out Ryan because she is so desperate to not go home. Then we vote out John, and then Ryan is left and knows that Haley flipped on him. Having those two here and not trusting each other would be great. I feel like Ryan has such a handle on John and Haley and we really need to split him away from those two. It's scary to think about the future, because I don't know if I will be there. A part of me wants to start planning my FTC speech and my f3 (which would most likely be Jake and Autumn) but Haley told me a few hours ago that John and Ryan were voting for me this round too. They think it's safest because my idol is gone. Now I' m stuck with just 2 coins that I'm impatiently waiting to exchange them for something. I'm really annoyed at Ryan and John constantly going against me and my side. I understand why Ryan is, I flipped on him and voted him out when we technically did have an alliance together (even though my heart wasn't in it). I just don't understand why I can't get along with John in this game. I have done nothing wrong to him. All I have done is listen to him and be lied to ever since merge started. It sucks that he has been so against me, especially because I thought we were good friends outside of this game, but he wants nothing to do with me, and he wants me out of the game so badly. I'm definitely getting votes tonight. I just don't know how many. Me Autumn and Jake are voting for John. If Rebecka joins us, we have majority. I just worry about any idol plays. It's getting to the end and people won't have much longer to use them. I need to compete hard in this upcoming immunity if I'm still here. Also I don't think me voting Ryan was the worst move anymore. Haley today told me that she thinks Rebecka voted for him, and I knew Ryan and John already think that. Also, another thing, I'm nervous that I may have lost some trust with Autumn and Jake over having the idol. Because I told Jake in pms first and then hours later he was like maybe we should tell autumn and I'll pretend I don't know, and I was like that sounds great. So I told them. But Autumn was a little hesitant with me when I told her. I hope it was just shock and not betrayal she felt. I really need these two to make it in this game. I couldn't even imagine having to strategize with Haley or John. 

Sooooooooo, I decided to make a move this round by pushing for Julia to go. I love Sam and Autumn but they want John out and are working with Rebecka to do it and I can't vote out John. I brought it up to John and Haley and then talked to Ryan and they seem down to do it. Rebecka seems to be extremely close to Dane, and Dane seems to have ties with just about everyone in this game...except me. I'm sorry but why should I vote out John who's always been honest with me and talks to me over Rebecka who hasn't bothered talking to me all game. I need to take some power away from Dane before he takes us all out.

Wow what a twist! Definitely didn't see Julia going home last night definitely miss her psycho ass. People are all on edge and think they are next to go and people don't know who has idols anymore in this game or who has half. I just hope we can keep the numbers and john, Ryan and myself will go to finals.

holy mother of everything good in this world i cannot believe we just pulled that off and im still probably in the clear

WHAT THE FUCK!!! Ok then. So Dane is telling me that Ned was just too big of a threat. But I’m so fucking pissed still. Whatever. I’m on a 4-6 minority with me Sam and Jake. However I hope Dane is willing to flip back. But I’d still need one more...dang it. I got work to do.

My hands r so dirty rn like BITCH LOLLL. Im actually terrible. Ned could have stayed if I voted with them. Too bad he had to be fake! Sorry not Sorry! Basically that shit wouldn't have happened if Rebecka and I didn't think it needed to. And Jake and Bryan are blaming DANE AND JOHN LOL THIS IS PERFECT. I'm actually DYINGGGG LMAOOO. 

fuck john fucking liar i fucking saved his ucking ass twice and this is how he repays me fuck out of here i can’t deal with these bitches everyone who voted out ned SUCKS AND I PUT SO MUCH TRUST INTO JOHN IM LITERALLY THE REASON WHY HE MADE IT TO MERGE AND HE CANT EVEN BE LOYAL FOR ONE FUCKING ROUND 

6-5 i was SHAKING during the tribal. i owe rebecka and julia m'life. i talked to sam/ned/autumn/jake more than i talked to rebecka and julia so im shocked they were the ones to save me??? as a previous winner im gonna be a loyal hoe to those who kept me. and autumn at least gave me the heads up that i was probably leaving, and it sucked i couldn't let her know i had a plan to save myself. like she was telling me "talk to ned, rebecka, haley and we can do something" and i already did that minus ned. i loved ned sm. i hate that this happened. but like he and sam were willing to turn on haley and i SO fast. i don't like that... also haley told john and i that she and chris were dating and LOL that makes so much sense it did'nt shock me. i'm glad i always talked good about haley to chris and vise versa.

I am so emotional and not ready to write this confessional. First it started with me fucking up. I thought I could trust Dane but I couldn’t. I knew Autumn wasn't with us but I didn’t think we would lose 2 impala to the other side. Then I fucked up more by telling Ned that we are safe and not to play an idol. I gave him my idol half which he then gave back to me and then told me he had a whole idol. He asked me several times if he should play it and I said no every time because I trusted everyone. I truly let Ned down and I don't know how I am going to go through this game without him. He was the 1 person I trusted with my entire game and now he's gone. I sound so dramatic but whatever, I lost my final 2. I can have all the feelings I want. I just don't know what to do now regarding who to work with. I also hate myself more bc I had tribal in another game immediately afterwards, and Ned was in this game with me. Anyway, Ned got 4 votes, I got 3. He had a super idol, which he could have played on himself after votes were read, and he made an announcement that he wasn't playing it because I deserve to be there more than him. I literally cried so much. Ned went home in 2 games back to back because of me. I fucked up the first tribal and he went home with an idol in his pocket and he gave up his game for me the second tribal. I know that this is going to be a relationship that I cherish for a long time. I truly care for him so deeply and it goes deeper than any game ever could. If I get nothing else out of this game, at least I got to form this beautiful and magical friendship with Ned. I can figure out the rest of this game tomorrow.

Me after getting blindsided in two different Survivor orgs within five minutes of each other https://twitter.com/ricardojkay/status/945781023006105600 Owen lucky Ned gave me a pep talk on his way out cause this is some bullshit and I sure was about to cut my losses and walk #yalldontdeserveme

 Well I went from everyone having to split the votes Ryan and I which would of led me to go home. I got everyone to switch that didn't want to put Ryan or my name down which was Julia,John,Rebecka,Ryan, and Dane. It definitely shows that they all can be trusted since Ned was the one that left last night. Bryan is still targeting me for the whole Emily vote which is bullshit that vote was forever ago and why would we tell the person that invited her to tribal it was going to be her and then have Bryan go back and tell Emily. I hope all the campaigning Bryan did to work against me just showed him who really has the numbers. I'm now going to make sure if Bryan doesn't get immunity again that he goes next. 

Ok so I really don't know who to trust at this point. I miss Ned soooo much. A lot of people from the other side have come to me to clear the air, but I really don't see a way to recover from this. Yesterday was an actual mess. Julia was lowkey bullying Bryan in the merge chat. I say lowkey, because it wasn't personal, it was game related, but it was extreme overkill. Bryan had said "ok thats fine" and "I see what I did wrong, I learned from my mistakes" etc and she continued to say things like "now go shit talk me more, I know you will" and it was just really rude. And Haley cheering her on in the background definitely amplified the situation to make Bryan feel worse. I feel like the only people I can trust are Bryan, Autumn, and Jake. It's hard though, because I know Bryan is a threat who needs to go. Autumn rarely talks to me. And I recently got close to Jake, so I know he has been working with Bryan a lot longer and would choose him over me in a heart beat. Dane seems to think that him flipping to vote out Ned wasn't "picking sides" and now everyone can be on a more even playing field. At least that's what he told me. He also doesn't want to think of them as "sides," he wants to vote out Bryan next. If there are sides and I vote out Bryan, It's literally going to be down to 3 vs 6, with me in the minority. As much as I love and miss Ned, I don't want to be in that jury. I want to be at FTC with Ned rooting for me the whole time. I also don't know how to feel right now. I'm conflicted, because everyone is telling me shady/sketchy things about Ned and reassuring me that it is best he is gone because he was untrustworthy, but I really don't think I believe it. Like I know Ned is such an honest and genuine person, I really can't see him playing me like that. And of course everyone will try to justify voting him out to me, it was so obvious we were a f2, we had never separated the ENTIRE game. Literally day 1 we were on impala and stayed there. I just don't know where to go from here. I'm upset that Haley and Dane won reward, it seems like the worst people to have won. Hopefully it doesn't help them in immunity. I really want to win. I'm scared though that if I do, Bryan will leave. A lot of people are upset about how he acted last round when he was immune. I don't know how I feel, I really just need to see how the next day goes. ALSO Dane getting under 5 minutes in that maze seems toooooo good. Like I did it as fast as I could and couldn't even finish half of it in that time. It seems very impossible. 

Errybody and they mama has been in my pm's explaining themselves and I'm like lmao ok but you're still cancelled. I have a heart though so I (probably) won't come for the apologizers first on the hitlist. DID SOMEBODY SAY HITLIST?!?! Yep it's about that time/ I'm back doing what I do best https://78.media.tumblr.com/b6fa3f3b282c7314c79578a6599d56b3/tumblr_n49f6q9bH11rsrbdko1_500.gif Also shoutout to everyone who believes in me. Thank you and sorry if I scared you I was like eyeball deep in my feelings after that vote (and Athena All Stars but we won't get into). I am NOT walking because there's too much justice that needs to be served

NED!!!! If Chris was my Beth, you were my Glenn cause you're so positive and hero-like aaaaannnd because I was a wreck when you died lol. Is it bad that I couldn't stop crying? http://cimg.tvgcdn.net/i/2016/12/15/b1aca255-c49f-4f8f-be1f-853d48cd3f55/maggie.gif I really hadn't seen the vote until you asked if I flipped. Then I went to watch the rest of the tribal video and started sobbing. Did I flip? Absolutely not and if I hadn't left the call, Crossroads would have my reaction to prove it. Whew if I had seen that shit live... look I'm an ugly crier and Crossroads can only exploit what I give it lmao. Anyway we spent half the game trying to make it back to each other only for you to die 5 minutes later and that suuucks rip. THANKS JULIA! YEP YOU HEARD RIGHT SIS IS NEGAN!!! Under all the humor and cute pro pics... tragic. Bryan only killing Chris and not you? Never judge a book by its cover haha. Anyway I hate this happened to you because you deserved so much better and I hope you're in a better place in jury. Imperium is in shambles- Scrappy is out here squaring up in people's pm's, Velma has gone awol, and Scooby is in the doghouse since everyone knows he has fleas. Idk what's about to happen but you're right everyone is a snake. Ok I should go I have a lot to do if I'm gonna make it to the end because #owensucks #crossroadsisugly Thank you for like playing this whack game and believing in me when I didn't believe in myself @ everyone else: https://78.media.tumblr.com/a661740fa7785ef674d1c8ef7971f4f9/tumblr_myzplpOrQ51ql5yr7o1_500.gif NOTHING YOU CAN SAY WILL STOP ME FROM BEING PETTY AND SENDING YOUR ASSES TO JURY SO SAVE YOUR BREATH!!! Do you need to explain yourself? Absolutely. Will it make a difference? NOPE. If you gave a fuck about me you wouldn't have lied in the first place. Also everything you say to me can and will be used against you so y'all really need to chill. I mean it- stop checking in like we're good because you will not know the answer to that until the game ends. Thinking that we're friends doesn't make it true. But you know what is true? I will send every single one of you to jury and I cannot fucking wait

I wish Jake would send things in one or two messages and not seven or eight 

OKAY So hours before the last tribal I wanted to vote out Jake because he's lodged up Bryan's ass. However, the only person that Ryan could get enough people to target was Ned due to the amount of people that he pissed off. So honestly between Ned or Ryan to stay? I think it's pretty obvious for me to know what's better for my game. :) After the tribal council however Bryan immediately called me and started yelling at me and demanding he knows what my strategy is moving forward in the game, but I wasn't going to give it away, so now I'm playing the role of the dumb sheep and I'm starting to make people believe that I'm not worth it to vote out at the moment. Anyways! After that call I thought I would give Bryan the benefit of the doubt and I just assumed that the tribal council would be a wake up call for his attitude, but nothing changed! He immediately ran his rat ass to Ryan and started talking shit about me so now I'm pissed at Bryan again. Now here we are again hours before the tribal council again and it's a shit show because from my point of view I think the votes are going to fall between Bryan and Julia.... maybe. Julia and Bryan had a "fight" in the main chat but I honestly believe it to be fake and I think Julia flipped back to Bryan and my paranoid ass is starting to believe that they're going to conspire against me and vote me out. BUT! I do think that my social standings with Sam would help me get past this vote. With that being said though I may have to abuse Sam's kindness to further myself into the rest of the game. I was thinking with Ryan and if we get Haley on board we can vote 3 votes onto Autumn or Sam (wildcards atm) and in the case that Bryan plays his idol (BTW I FORGOT TO SAY I FOUND AN IDOL RIGHT BEFORE TRIBAL LAST ROUND OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH MAMA) we can play one of our idols and get out Sam or Autumn. However, if we do that then we isolate ourselves as a 3 which is why Bryan, Jake, and John were targeted in the first place for.  This tribal council is going to be just as messy as the last one and I'm terrified and I don't want to waste my idol if people are telling the truth and isolate myself, but I don't want to go home with an idol in my pocket. 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=j4Xsc4Y0tbk

This round has just been a clusterfuck. After the Ned blindside I called John and found out that Julia was lying to my face and voted Ned which pissed me off so I exposed Julia shit talking John to me to John. After the call with John I told Bryan, Sam, and Autumn about Julia lying to us and I connected with Autumn finally. Bryan of course went and told everyone about Julia so Julia blew up on him in the main chat, gr8. Anyways I'm shook because I won the immunity and I really feel like I needed it this round for the potential of people voting me. Of course people were targetting Bryan and this twist could have changed things up, but John and Dane are too scared to make a move and there's no way we can vote Julia out this round which sucks. Idk what else to do, I tried. I just have to hope that things change soon or I'll be picked off. 

Sam pissed me off tonight. I was considering to flip to get Julia out but then after talking to her and Bryan I realise that this bottom four is getting closer. Sam and Bryan both mentioned they trusted each other. They lie for each other. I called Sam because I wanted to talk about voting Julia out the round after Bryan leaves and then when I tell her Dane & I are not flipping she goes from this happy girl with a happy voice to this sad girl and we sit in silence. Like... she was sad I wasn't flipping... like girl... why would I flip to the four fucking people who lied to me and voted for me. I want to flip honestly but not while there's that many people!!!!!!! I like Rebecka and Julia but they don't talk to me and I know they're closer to Dane & Haley as well with each other. Dane told me he got a FULL idol... cute John told me he has half the idol which I helped him get. I have my full idol. Haley has half an idol. So at least I know where these powers are going. My dream plan was to vote Julia out next but Sam kinda pissed me off. Autumn's been very real with me and Jake's been so active and apologetic in my pms. My dream is now to vote Sam off next and have John/Dane/Me/Autumn/Jake vote Julia after that. Maybe Rebecka too after. Then vote off Jake/Autumn. I'm super super tight with Haley, Dane, Coffey. I obviously know Coffey/Dane from my past but idk, I want to play and work with Haley because she's cool and new. I think I'd give Coffey 4th place. Go f3 Haley/Dane, and if it's a F2 I'll figure it out later. But i doubt I'll ever get there!! I bet Sam will win the F9 immunity ffs i hope not.

hey!! flopbecka here (@ashley the jingle jingle reindeer is anywhere hi!! thx for hating me im so happy to use the name u gave me <3 ) so i still dont know wtf is happening in the game, im in like a 6 person chat that i thought was just to get ned out, and now i think its like actually a real alliance chat? im confused af idk. I really want to work with autumn in this game and i just hope she still wants to after i didnt fill her in on the ned vote so woo go team