#trinityblaze

The nearer he drew, the more determined she was to stand her ground. Maybe he was really dumb and completely didn’t understand what she and her students had done. No, Faize wasn’t dumb; Faize was just too smart. Lymle knew that sometimes his brain just liked to over-complicate the simplest of things. ”It’s okay. I sent all of them home to get cleaned up,” she told him now that he stood only centimeters before her.

He nodded, acknowledging the words Lymle said, "I should hope so, especially if they looked anything like you." he commented, raising and eyebrow and chuckling slightly. Head to toe she was covered; he could only hope this paint wasn't the kind to get too stuck into clothes. The dress Lymle wore did seem to be her favourite one after all. However, it seemed that comment hadn't quite kept him in the good books.

Though his name was said softly, it wasn't hard for Faize to sense the tone of mischief that her face struggled to hide all the same. Against his better judgement, he stopped walking and turned back to the other with a smile, wondering what the call for attention was for--mischievous or not.

Lapsing into another silence, she continued to hang her head – suddenly feeling very small and fragile in his presence. It was as if the little girl she had finally grown out of was yanking her back – transforming her into the selfish child she used to be. But then again, hadn’t she been selfish all that time? Good girls didn’t think such terrible things, and Lymle was a good girl. Everyone said so, but everyone was wrong. Lymle was not a good girl; she was selfish and bad.

And amidst all of her inner turmoil, Faize waited patiently for her to answer him – hand still securely clasped around hers. Lymle knew she owed him the truth; Faize deserved honesty even if it meant losing him.

Shakily, she raised her head – at last permitting their eyes to lock. Unsurprising, the image of Faize’s face was blurred by the fog of unshed tears, but perhaps it was better that she confronted him with a muted perspective. That way the anger that would certainly be in his eyes would seem less severe.

”I’m sorry,” she started again, swallowing the lump that continuously rose up in her throat and ignoring the uneasy feeling settling in her stomach. “If you hate me and want to leave me after this, I won’t blame you, ‘kay?” She shivered as those words left her mouth. ”But I can’t regret all the bad things that happened. I’m sorry they did and people – Faize – suffered, but if they never happened, then things would be different. Faize wouldn’t be here with me.” Lymle pressed her hand deeper into Faize’s palm – fearing the moment when he would pull away from her. ”…Faize would be somewhere else…with someone else…happy…” she reflected in a distant and hollow voice. ”So I’m sorry because…because somehow…Faize’s sadness brought me happiness…”

He followed suit with the silence; wondering just what it may be that was playing on Lymle's conscience so badly, just what was pushing her to this sadness. Something he didn't want her to feel--what he didn't want anyone to become subject to--though he seemed to be unable to stop it, this time. There could have been countless things that lead to this; simple matters or complex ones.

Did Lymle want to leave him? Did she want Faize to leave? No, if that was the case she wouldn't be crying--nor holding so tightly to his hand.

Setting his own thoughts aside he waited patiently for Lymle to speak. Even if a flash of concern or worry crossed his features, it remained soft as ever. After all that he had been through--after all he had put them through--what right did he have to lose his temper? To criticise or judge? He'd been so far into the wrong he was almost certain that there was no redemption. That was why he had stayed so secluded up to this point. But Lymle still accepted him, and right now that was more than enough to give hope to Faize.

His eyes widened a little as Lymle lifted her eyes to meet his, but he didn't retain the surprise. Watching her carefully, he did his best to keep smiling as if it may make her feel better. Or at least, allow her to keep speaking. He shook his head. "I'll be the one to decide that." he murmured. But if she was truly considering the notion that Faize would leave her... just what was playing in her mind?

The smile he'd thus far kept upon his face for her slowly started to fade. His eyes averted slightly. The last thing he wanted to recall was the pain and turmoil he went through--but it was something that stalked his every step. It was the cause of his loneliness that only Lymle was there to relieve. It was a large part of his fractured heart--that... again, Lymle was there to slowly fix.

Lymle had finished speaking, but Faize couldn't bring himself to speak. Conflicted. Admittedly hurt, but he understood where she was coming from. After all, the same was the case for him, wasn't it? If all those things hadn't happened, he wouldn't have Lymle. It wasn't she, who had only gained something from this. Nor was she the only person who had lost someone through it all. In fact, Lymle had already--assumed she had--lost him twice.

His hand gripped more tightly to hers and he took a step forward, pulling her into an embrace. Presumed dead twice now... he understood how lonely she must have felt. He hadn't recognised her feelings until--nor his own--until it was much later. But... they hadn't changed. And no way did he want her to feel lonely again. Despite the suffering, despite the pain--he didn't want to be alone again.