#trappped

Is great.. until you remeber your allergic too the sun

And easily get over heated..

today I went to bed around 2am. I fell asleep and woke up at 3:25. I know this because I opened my eyes, rather suddenly, and got my phone from the floor and placed it under my pillow after checking the time. There is blank moment, very brief where I blacked out, passed out again possibly, and next thing I know is I'm having a very threatening, scary nightmare about my cousin's violin, which is downstairs. I get scared because

(fun fact: My cousin doesnt live in the house, he's just house-sitting and he's been scared before by moving chairs, lamps and fans, noises and lights. I had decided to spend the night knowing this because I wanted to see if it would do that with me being there considering I go to that house practically every day of the year and it had never donw anything like this to the family thats lived there for 12 years.)

... because i know all of this, and i decide to call out my cousin's name. But then I realize I can't. My lips are closed (im known to sleep with my mouth wide open and drooling) and i cant open them. I can't move anything as a matter of fact, im trapped inside my body and i cant move or scream. Im scared as fuck but in the midst of all this i realize i can moan/whine with my lips together so i do that, crying now, and then I realize, the thought struck me suddenly, 'I am not dreaming. I am awake.' so I focused my entire being into my lips, and only then did I open my eyes and was able to call out for him. And as if that weren't enough, when I opened my eyes I was facing in the exact direction as my 'nightmare' and was seeing the exact same thing, not a centimeter off.

I decided not to sleep the rest of the night, i didn;t want to go through that again. But then I started getting the jerks. they're little electrical discharges from your brain in epileptic people (me) that cause loss of muscle and memory control, so I was having a very hard time praying without losing it and having to start over again. I went to get my medicine (it about 5am at this point, I guessed it would be okay to take my morning dose at that time instead of having a seizure in front of my poor cousin) and as soon as the medicine was in my hand, the fucking jerks went away on their own.