Tranquilena 4/4
Terenti growled as he watched Ilena struggle to feed herself with her magical left hand. It was not a prosthetic hand powered by magic, no, the proud idiot had simply made the entire thing from magic and thought to use it to eat.
“For fuck’s sake, woman, you’re not even left-handed,” Terenti groused.
His exclamation made Ilena lose her concentration and the spoon dropped back into her bowl with a clatter. She glared at him and smacked him with the malformed magic. “I am trying to practice fine motor control, you idiot.”
“Maybe now you’ll do the sensible thing and stay in the black line with me instead of running stupidly into the thick of battle,” Terenti said. He leaned back in his chair until only two legs were on the floor. Despite his casual tone and dismissive attitude, he kept his ankle touching her knee, still unable to break contact.
“Shut up. I’m not going to be the one that embarrasses us at those stupid Tevinter parties,” Ilena snapped, picking up the spoon again.
The chair gave out underneath Terenti and he hit the ground with the crash. “Tevinter?! You’re going to Tevinter?” He stood, righted his chair and sat down again. “With Pavus, I suppose, to help with his poli-”
“Don’t propose a third time. The first two were bad enough. I got the idea and agreed already.”
First, elation. Then… confusion. “A… third time?”
Ilena dropped the spoon again and let the magic of her arm dissipate. Her glared was annoyed and bordering on angry. And not in the fun way. “Yes, a third time. You muddled your way through it twice, no reason to… Do you really not remember?”
Terenti knew he was treading dangerous water, but he wasn’t sure how to get out. His mind had been muddled ever since the ritual to make the cameo failed. “Of course I remember. You laughed at me.”
She didn’t buy it. “You don’t remember.” Then louder. “You don’t remember? How could you-” Ilena froze, her eyes on his except not on his. They were on the magical growths around his eyes. “What did you trade?”
Terenti pushed his chair back from the table. “I don’t know what you’re-”
Ilena grabbed him by the collar and pulled him in. “What did you give Fear for that magic?”
“The only thing I had left, since you took everything else!” Terenti hissed.
“The only thing- How much did you forget? What did it take?” Ilena tried to shake him, but couldn’t get proper leverage with only one hand. “Answer me!”
“I didn’t exactly need memories of you if you were dead, did I?” Terenti shouted.
Ilena shook her head and released him. She swiped at her face and looked offended to find tears on her cheeks. She shook her head again. With a sniff, she turned her back on him. “I need… To be alone. For a little while.” She paused and even if Terenti could see her face, he could hear the tears in her voice. “Don’t go anywhere. Don’t you fucking dare.”
Terenti didn’t follow her out of the room.
He hoped he wouldn’t regret it.
---
The chasm in his chest had reopened. Maybe he was dependent on Ilena. Maybe he didn’t fucking care. No matter how stupid he kept telling himself he was, he didn’t care that he didn’t remember her. He’d loved her once and he was never wrong. Except about his mother, but that was different. She’d been evil. Ilena was too dumb to be that evil. Whatever they’d had had been real or it wouldn’t have blown up so dramatically in their faces.
At least, that’s what Terenti told himself as he laid alone in their bed that night. The magic on his face felt wrong. Maybe Fear didn’t like the new developments, didn’t like how Terenti was no longer on the verge of full capitulation. Probably. Either way, his face itched and burned in turns and he wouldn’t have been able to sleep even if he could normally. He hadn’t had the courage to watch the stables and make sure she hadn’t lied and was leaving.
He hadn’t even had the energy to pretend it was because he trusted her. He was afraid, terrified, that the few days they’d spent together since the last of her memories came back would be the last he had with her. As the night passed with no sign of her, he fought the urge to dig through his bags for the last few traces of her blood that he had. He should have made the cameo while she was recovering, should have made a stupid Southern phylactery or something to give him peace of mind.
Dread began to settle over his mind as dawn’s light first started creeping in the tower windows. It wouldn’t be dawn on the ground for some time, but the light felt like it was renewing a curse. It stung his eyes and- Actually, no, it was- Terenti screamed as the magical augmentations on his face burned and flared into pain far greater than their creation had held. He clawed at his face and his hands came away bloody, but Fear didn’t answer his calls. He fell unconscious before he knew what was happening.
---
Sa’alle’s voice was just as insufferable as ever. Terenti could only make out every other word at first, not that it mattered. He was scolding someone in that ridiculous way healers always thought would make people stop doing things that injured them. Tentatively, Terenti reached up and touched around his right eye. It was still smooth and cold. He pulled on the Fade and everything turned wispy and blurry but translucent, so he released the magic and blinked. His vision took longer to return to normal, so he whined loudly in his head.
No response.
With a frown, he rolled onto his side and watch Sa’alle get on with his scolding. Relief flooded him with annoyance in equal measure when he realized that Sa’alle was complaining at Ilena. Terenti grabbed a bowl next to his bed and threw it at the back of his head. He missed and hit him square in the back, but it got his attention well-enough. “Leave her alone, Sa’alle. She’s mine.”
Sa’alle made an annoyed sound in the back of his throat and threw his hands in the air dramatically before leaving.
Terenti frowned at Ilena once he left. She looked as guilty as she was smug. “What did you do this time? Piss off Fear?”
“I,” Ilena started, though even the simple word came out as a croak. She coughed several times. “I did not piss off Fear. I killed Fear.”
Mouth open to disagree, Terenti froze before the first word could escape him. Not because she looked weak and tired from whatever it was she had done, no, it was because she could very well be telling the truth. He scanned back through his memories and… They were all there. A little jumbled and exaggerated, but it was all back. Every shared glance, hair tuck, soft touch, rough touch…
“...Just like that.”
“I’m the Inquisitor. I do whatever the fuck I want.”
Terenti closed his eyes and years of exhaustion struck him all at once. He cried in relief. Before he let sleep take him, he said, or tried to, “Want to take over Tevinter, vhenan?”
