i think??? i can feel some of my desire to be creative coming back. this time itβs thanks to good olβ alana, new addition bruce, and an old favorite i couldnβt manage to write for so long but i think in my shit with my mom might be helping me in a big way. i think it says a lot that i was afraid to reengage with sharp objects because millieβs relationship with adora is too raw for me to handle but i forgot the most important thing millie would want me to remember: healing hurts, but itβs still healing. it starts with the hard stuff.
i havenβt felt at the fuck all creative and i have to deal with this horribly uninspired sensation i canβt get rid of. but itβs creeping back in. i justβ¦ couldnβt manage the energy to love or want to love anything. but iβve done yet another rewatch with @dinobitten and fox, as they are always talented at doing, has brought out a lot of my creativity from where it decided to hide from me. a warning: this means iβm going to 0% control my writing styles unless requested specifically for a thread with the partner. if it personally bugs you, please inform me and i wonβt do the different writing styles for our specific thread.
otherwise, expect me to probably match tone or perspective that you set because once you get the flow, you get the flow. i find that if reading someoneβs second or first person reply, i tend to flow into complementing in my own reply their preferred writing style. it makes me feel less like iβm shackled by the bullshit english degree that beat too much consistency into me. iβm just way better when iβm untethered and i gotta remember to embrace that.
i love you guys. thank you for being on this journey. and helping me get back a part of myself i miss so badly. if you guys have any nice words, i would hugely appreciate them, but i wanted to sayβ thank you. just thank you. for accepting my chaotic nature. for being here when i sometimes feel lost (yes, even just by existing on my dash or briefly imβing me). and for being here while iβm going through the most disastrous time in my life.









