#top x reader

CH 7

More people have arrived, including Chae Kyoung-Sun, the art director from Squid Game and Seunghyun’s Studio54 music video. The last time you saw her was in LA when things were…less than ideal.

“Y/N!” She calls out to you. “I didn’t think I’d see you here. Is Jae-Joon with you?”

“Um, no. Not tonight.” You say quietly.

“His announced retirement from acting was a shock. What are you two going to get up to with all his free time? The tabloids mentioned a baby on the way…” She winks, before her eyes drift to your midsection. You raise your wine glass, taking a long sip, shutting down her theory.

”Oh, well. You know how the media loves rumors.” Her attention is drawn to the intricate diamond band on your middle finger. “Your ring is stunning. Jae really out did himself. It’s clear that he is dedicated to curating the most beautiful life for the two of you. I look forward to seeing it unfold.”

You smile back at her. “He is very dedicated to making his dreams come true.” You say convincingly, when you hear Seunghyun’s graveled laughter across the room, grabbing you attention. “If you’ll excuse me.”

The chimes of Seoul Chaos followed by Seunghyun’s harmonizing vocals send a chill down your spine as you recall last year.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Your trip to LA was going to be a fresh start. You would wipe yourself clean of Seunghyun for good and move towards your new life with Jae. No more wavering.

The lust you once had for Seunghyun had been replaced with anger, which fueled your desire to make Jae’s dreams a reality, propelling the narrative forward. Jae was vocal in interviews about settling down with you and starting a family and you no longer denied it. Instead, you committed to the bit, showing affection publicly and speaking candidly about your future together when on the red carpet. The media loved you as a couple and the tabloids loved making predictions about your lives together, giving you motivation to keep going. What you didn’t know is that every wedding prediction and baby watch post was ripping Seunghyun’s heart out.

You and Jae ring in the New Year of 2025 in LA where he is filming what is said to be the biggest film of his career.

It will also be his last. After much deliberation, he’s decided to retire from acting and follow his dream of pursuing a simplistic life.

In a strange chain of events, that you could only chalk up to fate, you run into Seunghyun while at lunch with Jae. He’s telling you about the property he is purchasing when he notices someone familiar enter the restaurant. You prepare yourself for an introduction.

“Hey babe, this is IRKO. He’s been working on the sound mixing for the film soundtrack.”

“A pleasure.” You smile, extending your hand.

“So you’re the infamous Y/N.” He smiles. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Jae.” He then turns his attention behind him. “This is TOP.”

You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out.

”Hey, Seunghyun!” Jae stands, hugging him. “Good to see you again. Your work on Squid Game was amazing. You here for promotion?”

“No, working on music actually.”

His solo album.

”You two know each other? Small world!” IRKO exclaims. “Have you met Jae’s lovely lady?”

“We’ve met.” Seunghyun says, avoiding eye contact.

“It’s good to see you too.” You mumble as he turns to walk towards their table.

IRKO follows after a friendly wave, oblivious to the awkwardness of the situation.

“He’s an interesting one…standoffish. No wonder things didn’t work out when you met for that art acquisition I asked about.” Jae chuckles, reflecting on the interaction. “He’s become such a recluse. It’s hard to believe he once shared a stage with G Dragon. Now that’s an idol...”

“Speaking of GD. He’s invited us to the opening Übermensh show in Korea next month…I thought it would be a good break from work.” You smile wide.

“No way! That’s awesome, babe.” He says, genuinely excited. “It’s still so wild to me that you have that kind of relationship with him.”

“I told you we were close. You just can’t seem to wrap your head around it.” You grin. You’ve been trying to allude to the impact BIGBANG has had on your life in hopes of coming clean with Jae about your past. Each time you bring it up he seems to brush it off, not wanting to fully hear what you’re saying.

Jae then jumps into a long spiel about the land he’s closing on in Jeju Island. The secluded, off the grid style location is beautiful, just not really your vibe…but it will be, you tell yourself. Your mind wanders as you look around the cafe just in time to lock eyes with Seunghyun. You remain emotionless and you can tell by his expression it hurts. Good.

As you and Jae stand to leave you pull him into a kiss. He grabs your ass in response and you let out a playful giggle in hopes of drawing attention. You look back to see Seunghyun’s jaw clench before leaving the cafe hand in hand.

————————-

A month later, you and Jae have the time of your lives at Jiyong’s concert. The after party is filled with you making introductions for Jae who is astounded by the amount of people you know in the music industry.

“My girl is a celebrity!” He says kissing you deeply. “This has been the best night. I’m so glad you pulled me away from filming. LA was really dragging me down.”

“You deserve it.” You say kissing him back. “Besides…gotta get out while we can right?” You wink, feeding into his ‘let’s start a family’ plan.

Jae is whispering something about finding a coat closet to hook up in when you look up to see Jiyong spot you from across the room. He heads directly towards you.

“Shit, that’s G Dragon.” Jae says enthusiastically. “Do you think he’s coming this way to talk with us?”

“I’m sure he is.” You say apprehensively, knowing Jiyong is coming for you.

When he reaches your table, Jiyong puts on a show. “Infamous actor Kim Jae-Joon, good to finally meet you in person.”

Starstruck, Jae grips his hand tightly. “The fact that you have heard of me floors me. It’s truly an honor. Your show was outstanding.” He looks to you, nervously. “I-I guess you know my girlfriend already?”

“I could never forget her.” Jiyong says, emotionless. “I actually need to borrow her for a moment. Hope you don’t mind Jae.” He says, flashing his million dollar smile.

“Oh, no, of course…by all means.” Jae smiles awkwardly.

“It’ll only take a minute.” Jiyong links his arm with yours and leads you towards a back hallway.

“Ji…slow down…” You prompt as he all but pushes you into the hall.

Once secluded, he lays into you. “What the fuck are you doing Y/N?”

“Good to see you too Ji…”

He stares back at you. “Are you having fun in your delusional world, playing house with your Korean actor Ken doll?”

You cross your arms, angrily. “I am living my life like he told me to Ji. If you have questions, maybe you should take it up with Seunghyun.” You see Jae searching you out in the crowd.

“Oh trust me, we’ve talked. Plenty.”

“Then you would know that HE made this choice. He’s done with me.”

“That’s not true.” Jiyong shakes his head in disagreement. “Every article released about you two, every tabloid hinting at a wedding or baby is killing him. ”

You look back at him in confusion. “He told me to choose Jae. I was fully prepared to leave but Seunghyun told me not to. He said he was bad for me. That he would just hurt me again and that I had to let him go for good. He ended things, Ji, not me.”

Jiyong stares back at you.

“I know it’s easy for you to blame me and think that I am the reason for all this after everything we have been through but this time I was all in and ready to throw this life away. Seunghyun didn’t give me the option.” You say sternly. “He doesn’t want me, Ji.”

Jiyong’s face falls. “He didn’t mean what he said…he wants to be with you. He’s just too scared to admit it.”

“He’s had a lot of time to step up and be brave.” Jae locks eyes with you across the way and waves. You put on a smile and wave back to the man that is now your future. You then pause, letting your guard down. “I never stopped loving him.” You say, breaking your gaze, returning it to Jiyong. “I love him more than he will ever understand….”

“I know…” he says quietly. “I know he’s still in love with you too… he always will be.” He pauses, then adds, “What if he told you to leave and be with him? That would change things…right?”

You shake your head. “In a perfect world…but we both know he won’t do that. I can’t keep playing this game. Jae is going to be my future now. I am going to marry him and start our life together sooner rather than later. Seunghyun has to live with that. Unfortunately, you are going to have to just pick up the pieces.”

Jiyong looks at you, sorrowfully, and nods, knowing in his heart, it’s done.

“Thank you for a great night G Dragon.” You say before turning away, back to Jae.

———————————-

When May comes all eyes are on Jae. The day of TUDUM is hectic. At the event, Jae is presenting the teaser trailer for his new film and planning to announce his retirement after its release. As a celebration, you scheduled the pick up of the David Hockney piece Seunghyun helped you acquire for that night.

The plan was to hit the red carpet, do pictures and press, enjoy the event, and then head out to pick up the piece around 8pm. Jae was elated when you told him.

“What a coincidence…I have quite the surprise arranged for you tonight as well.” He says into the crook of your neck, his hand sliding up your thigh.

“Control yourself.” You blush. “We are next on the press carpet.”

He doesn’t stop. His hands are all over you for every paparazzi photo. When you get to the press line, every question is the same. Marriage, family, future acting roles…and then Rolling Stone Korea steps in.

“Jae-Joon, you’re at your peak popularity. Your fans look forward to what you have to share with them tonight. But I think they are all wondering if the rumors are true? Is there a little action star on the way for you two?”

Jae, loving the attention, feeds into it, placing his hand just right on your waistline. “It’s all we’ve ever wanted, so only time will tell.” He winks before pulling you away.

“They are going to have a field day with that babe.” You say through laughter as you head towards the other photo-ops.

“Let them talk. We will manifest it together.” He grins.

Seunghyun lingers back in the pressline. You hadn’t noticed he was behind you and had heard the whole exchange. He saw the way Jae held onto you protectively, kissed you, touched you. And now you were…he didn’t want to think about it. He made the choice to let you go. It shouldn’t be surprising to see you moving on. He had no one to be angry with but himself. So he takes a deep breath, and does what he does best. Pretend.

——————————-

Jae leaves you to find the green room space you’ve been assigned backstage. He had his manager track down some boxes of old photos from your apartment back in Seoul so he could find the picture of himself as a kid with the painting. He wanted to bring it for good luck later tonight when the two of you picked up the painting together. You laugh at the thought of his manager lugging boxes of photos into a Netflix event.

“I apologize in advance, there was a mix up and we had to create a shared space for you and Mr. Kim with another actor.” One of the backstage managers tells you as she escorts you down a long hall.

“It’s no problem. Really.” You assure her, reaching the door. “I appreciate all your hard work. Jae and I are easy going, we are happy to share the space.”

“Please let me know if you need anything.” She replies, relieved. “Their segment is one of the first to go on so you’ll have some alone time while they’re on stage. Mr. Kim will be called for when his time arrives.”

You nod graciously and enter the room to find your bags containing your change of clothes for tonight already waiting along with…Seunghyun.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” You say out loud.

“I was just as surprised as you are when they told me.” He says coldly, not looking up from his phone.

He’s wearing sunglasses and a black on black Alexander McQueen suit with star embellishments. He looks…sexy.

You grab a bottle of water from the fridge and take a long drink to distract yourself. “You didn't think to tell them it was a bad idea?”

“They didn’t give me much choice.” He says standing. “You know I prefer not to ruffle feathers if I can help it so I just let it be. I wasn’t aware being in the same room with me would be so triggering for you.”

“It’s not me I’m worried about.” You say approaching him. “A certain Dragon told me not too long ago that you’re the one who can’t handle it.” You say raising your voice.

“I’m not trying to upset you…” He says, his demeanor changing. “I go onstage soon so I’ll be out of your hair.”

You look at him, frustrated, and begin pacing. “Fine. Whatever.”

“Hey…Take a deep breath, sit.” He says gesturing to the couch. “Stress can’t be good for you and the b…” He doesn’t finish the sentence but his gaze settles on your figure.

You instinctively cross your arms over your midsection. “I’m not pregnant, if that’s what you’re insinuating. You of all people shouldn’t believe everything you see or read in the news.”

You note a flood of relief that crosses his face as there is a knock at the door.

“Mr. Choi? You’re on stage in five.” The stage manager calls through the door.

“See? I’m already gone.” He says, hands up, turning towards the door.

“Break a leg.” You tell him, as he turns to leave.

———————————-

When Jae enters a few moments later, he’s carrying a duffle bag and his demeanor has changed drastically from when you left him.

“Aw babe, you couldn’t find the photo?” You ask, disappointed for him.

He tosses the bag into the couch and looks at you. “Oh, no…I found it…along with some other memories I wasn’t aware of. Care to take a look?” He questions, gesturing to the bag.

You walk over, peering inside. What you find is your own box of photos. The one once hidden under your side of the bed. His manager must’ve misunderstood and grabbed both…You didn’t do the best at hiding it honestly. You knew this day would come, you just weren’t expecting the conversation to begin here in LA at TUDUM of all places.

“This is my photo box from when I was with YG.” You say, opening the lid.

“Sure.” He says, firmly. “But I’d say there’s more than just old dance memories in that box. Looks like you and Seunghyun were a lot closer than you initially led on.”

He went through all of them? You think to yourself as you pick up a Polaroid capturing you in Seunghyun’s lap, kissing him passionately, his hand on your hip and your hand buried in his bleached white hair.

“There’s a lot like that. Some are even more provocative. I’d say your relationship was more than a fling. ” He says, his voice laced with anger.

“I never said it was.” You attempt to keep your voice calm. “Those were your words, not mine. I just never really had the chance to…”

“Tell me you were madly in love with him?”

“Jae…some of these were taken over 15 years ago…”

“But this wasn’t.” He says holding the ultrasound photo up at you.

You open your mouth, but you can’t quite find the words to respond.

“Do you have a secret love child out there that I don’t know about? God, Y/N this is…a big thing to keep from me for so long…” He says, frustrated. “You hid a pregnancy from me…”

“I…I found out I was pregnant in 2019.”

Jae looks at the photo and back at you. “By whom? A one night stand? Tell me it was a stupid mistake.”

You look back at him, silent.

“If that baby was his Y/N…it changes everything. Tell me the baby wasn’t his Y/N…Tell me!!!”

Seunghyun returns from his Squid Game segment just as Jae’s voice intensifies.

“Oh great! This is perfect timing.” Jae’s laugh is unsettling as he turns to Seunghyun. “Maybe you can shed some light on this situation. Does this look familiar?” Jae asks, holding up the ultrasound photo. “Did you knock her up? Was this yours?” He prods.

Seunghyun winces at his words but does his best to maintain his cool. “Jae, you need to calm down. We are all adults here, we can talk about this calmly.”

“Fuck! Your expression tells me all I need to know.” Jae groans in frustration as he shifts his focus between you and Seunghyun. “So what happened to the baby?” He asks, sticking his finger in Seunghyun’s chest. “Did you make her get an abortion because the infamous TOP from BIGBANG couldn’t handle fatherhood? Didn’t want a baby throwing off your idol success?”

Seunghyun keeps his composure and says nothing, but his eyes are locked on you.

Silent tears stream down your cheeks as you gather the nerve to say your piece. “It was unexpected…but…I…”

“But what? Couldn’t fathom the idea of being a mother?”

“Don’t talk to her like that.” Seunghyun says sternly, coming to your defense, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“You ran from responsibility and gave it up? Or…”

“We lost the baby.” Seunghyun finishes the sentence so you don’t have to. “Is that the answer you wanted to hear? She would’ve been an amazing mother but was robbed of the opportunity. If you would shut up for five minutes then maybe she could explain things to you.”

Jae looks at you, recalling the story shared before. “That story you told me…about your friend…”

“I wasn’t truthful…it happened to me.” You say quietly.

The color drains from his face. “Is this why you recoiled every time I brought up starting a family? Because of the baby you almost had with…him?” He points angrily at Seunghyun.

“Jae…” You sob. “I didn’t know how to tell you…I tried but…”

“You chose to lie instead. God I am so stupid!” He paces. “You’ve always acted strange around him but I just thought it was his idol status influencing you…You still have feelings for him, don’t you?”

You’re silent as Jae continues to berate you.

“You don’t want a family with me…you want one with him!”

“ENOUGH.” Seunghyun erupts. “At the end of the day, she chose you. Are you that insecure of yourself that you can’t move past this? Yes, she withheld this from you but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s WITH you. She chose YOU.”

“The two of you had a whole life together! She’d throw it all away in a heartbeat if you would take her back!” Jae shouts.

Seunghyun looks to you, eyes full of sadness.

“Tell me I’m wrong.” Jae exclaims. “Tell me I’m overreacting and paranoid. That you want a family with me. Tell me he’ll never cross your mind ever again and I’ll let all of this go. Make your choice, him or me.”

You sink to the floor where the box of photos has tumbled to the ground. The memories of a life that left you feeling fulfilled with the man you truly love are spread out before you.

“I would choose him.” You say looking up through your tears. “I would choose him a hundred times over.”

Seunghyun stands still, absorbing your words as Jae clears his throat and straightens his suit.

“I thought you might say that…”

“I tried Jae…”

“You did a great job pretending…wasting 4 years of my life.” He exhales, gathering his things. “You know…I was going to propose to you tonight. Everything was falling into place. The marriage you told me you wanted, our kids, the house in Jeju…all the stories you told me to keep hanging on. I was going to make it a reality.”

“I’m sorry…I can’t keep pretending anymore…”

“No, not that he’s here now.” He says, patting Seunghyun on the back as he approaches the door. “So thanks for setting up this acquisition for her Seunghyun, in hindsight, I guess that painting saved me from living a life of lies.”

Seunghyun crouches beside you and begins picking up the photos.

“I am going on stage soon. I’m sticking to my plan. I will announce my retirement. My life will stay on course, yours no longer concerns me. I need you gone, Y/N. Go back to Seoul and pack your things. We are done.” His voice lacking any emotion.

“But your painting…it belongs to you now.”

“They can keep it. I don’t want to remember this night.” He exhales as he stops at the door before turning to face you. “You’ve ruined that memory for me along with so many others. I’d prefer to forget you completely. This conversation is over.” He then leaves, slamming the door behind him.

———————————————————————————-

Master List

It had first started when you had attended a BigBang concert in your early twenties — you had been a huge fan of the band and your parents had got you tickets that year as a Christmas present. The concert had been perfect, everything you could have wished for and more but what you didn't expect was what had happened afterwards. You had been taking a quick smoke break outside the arena before you caught your train back to your area of the city when a familiar face had leaned against the wall next to you. Seunghyun, with his handsome face and incredibly aloof demeanor had said nothing at first but the second you spoke to him, the two of you hit it off. One thing led to another and before you knew it you were back in his hotel room, tangled in his sheets.

That's how it had started and that's how it continued each time he visited Japan. It had never been anything serious; two people hooking up whenever they had a chance to see each other, nothing more. But, then it all stopped. Seunghyun's 'scandal' broke and he had hid himself away. The texts from him stopped, all communication had ended. It had hurt more than you thought it would but not because you were in love with him, no. Maybe, over the years you had developed some kind of feelings for him but you were mostly concerned about him. Despite the relationship you two had mostly being about sex, you confided in each other, spilled your deepest, darkest secrets. That was how you had learned how much of an anxious, emotional person he was. You just hoped that he had someone with him through those difficult times.

It had been ten years since he had last stepped foot in Japan. Ten years since you had a text off him but that all changed.

Seunghyun Hey, this is Seunghyun. Hope this is still the right number but… you still in Japan? You Oh, long time, no see. But, yeah, it's still me. Still in Japan. Seunghyun Heading there for a fan meet next week. Want to meet up?

The nerves were running through you like wildfire. It had been ten long years since you had seen him. For all you knew, your connection could've changed. The fire that had always been there before might have died out. Ten years was a long time, feelings and thoughts changed — people changed and you definitely weren't the same person you had been a decade ago. Neither was he. It was a reunion you never thought would happen again. You had resigned yourself to never seeing him again but now you were five minutes away from being face to face with the guy who had consumed your thoughts all those years ago.

Seunghyun had invited you to the Gucci event he was attending. He hadn't told you much just to dress nice so you had picked out your nicest outfit, making sure you could look your best. You never attended events like these. You were one of those people who would much prefer to stay inside away from the crowds and people. But, he had asked you and how could you refuse.

The air felt like it had been punched from your lungs the second you laid your eyes on him. He looked incredible. His hair styled perfectly, dressed in all black and that damn leather jacket. No words had been spoken between you two yet and he was already driving you insane. Time had been good to him. If anything, you thought he looked the most handsome he ever had.

"Hi," he laughed awkwardly, giving you a small wave as he approached. "You look… great."

"Oh, thank you," you couldn't help the blush on your cheeks from appearing. "So, do you. I can't believe its been so long."

"I'm sorry," he frowned. "I swear I wanted to reach out sooner but… I wasn't in a good place and I couldn't drag you down with me."

You shook your head, reaching your hand out to rest on his forearm. "Hey, it's okay. You're here now and that's what matters. You're doing good now, yeah?"

"Yeah, really good."

"I'm glad."

"So, want to come look at some really expensive jewelry with me so I don't go bored out of my mind?" He held his arm out for you which you gladly took.

"Lead the way."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── 

The electricity between you was still there. Each time you felt his hand on your lower back guiding you or when he leaned in to whisper in your ear in that deep, gentle voice of his, you felt the sparks. It was making you dizzy. In the past decade you had been with a few other guys but none of them made you feel the way Seunghyun did when he touched you. It was purely innocent too so you could only imagine how it would feel if he ever touched you again like he used to.

At one point, at the end of the event when Seunghyun had said goodbye to people, he had noticed you tense up when he placed his hand on your back. He tilted his head to the side, concern lacing his voice. "Everything okay?"

You hummed, nodding your head. "Yeah, yeah, everything's fine."

"You sure, you seem really tense…" He eyed you suspiciously, the high tone of your voice piquing his interest.

"Just… cold in here."

"Cold, huh?"

"Yep."

"And that's why your cheeks are flushed?" He teased, leaning in a little closer to whisper in your ear.

You didn't speak, you couldn't. The feeling of his hot breath against your ear sent shivers down your spine. He knew, of course he did. That smirk on his face gave it all away. And, to top it all off, he decided to tease you even more by snaking his arm around your waist, his hand resting firmly against you. With no words, he guided you through the halls of the venue until he found the empty bathrooms. There was no hesitation in his movements when he pulled you into one of the stalls. He crowded into you, pressing you up against the stall wall.

"Now," he started, voice low. "Are you going to tell me the truth? What's wrong?"

"You already know. Don't make me say it."

"I want to it hear it."

"You're driving me crazy!" You blurted out. "Showing up looking like… that. I didn't know what to expect after all this time but, my God, Seunghyun, you're driving me insane."

"Good answer," he gave you no time to answer, his lips crashing against yours. His hand came up to tangle in your hair, tugging your head back so he could deepen the kiss. His tongue tangled with yours, lips moving furiously as he tasted you again after all this time. He pulled away for a second, lips ghosting over yours, speaking breathlessly. "For the record, the feeling is very mutual."

His hand guided one of yours to the prominent bulge straining against his pants. When you rubbed your palm against him, he groaned, his lips finding yours once again. It was like you couldn't get enough of each other. The tension, the desire of the last decade finally coming to a head. You pulled your head back from him, sinking down to your knees. Quickly, you unbuckled his belt, tugging his pants down his legs. He let out a hiss as the cold air hit him, his cock hard and aching. You wasted no time wrapping your hand around his length, your thumb swiping over the head of his cock gathering the precum using it to glide your hand around him smoother.

"Fuck," Seunghyun huffed, his head falling back against the stall. "Forgot how good it feels to have you touchin' me like that."

"It's about to get even better," you smirked. Seunghyun watched with hooded eyes as you leaned forward, your tongue licking a long stripe on the underside of his cock from bottom to top. Your tongue swirled around the tip, moaning as you tasted him. The second your lips wrapped around him, Seunghyun felt like he was in heaven. He watched your every move as you took him in your mouth. What you couldn't fit in, you pumped with your hand, setting a steady rhythm. Seunghyun couldn't help but roll his hips against your face. You felt his fingers tangling in your hair, twitching with the urge to pull you even deeper. He watched the way your cheeks hollowed out with every slide, his hips beginning to thrust to match your rhythm.

"Holy fuck," he rasped, his voice a deep, guttural groan. His control was failing, he was struggling to hold back. "Don't stop."

He finally lost it when you took him deep into the back of your throat, choking around him. He grit his teeth, holding your head in place as he took control. His hips snapped against your face driving himself deep into your mouth with each lunge. He couldn't tear his eyes away from you. The way you were drooling, the tears at the corners of your eyes as he hit the back of your throat. It was all too much.

With all the strength he could muster, he pulled himself from your mouth with a pop, gasping heaving breaths. No words were spoken as he hauled you up, spinning you around so you were facing the wall. He kicked your feet apart, spreading your legs for him. It took him all of five seconds to pull your dress up, pull your panties to the side and position himself. He dragged his cock through your wet folds, moaning at the sensation. "So wet for me."

"Always," you gasped, trying to push back against him but he held your hips firmly still. "Please, Seunghyun. Just fuck me."

"Since you asked so nicely."

In one smooth thrust, he pushed himself inside you to the hilt, his hips flush against your ass. He let out a long, deep groan, stilling for a moment. You moaned at the feeling of him inside you after so long. He was so big, so deep. You had almost forgotten what it felt like to feel so full. He pulled his hips back almost all the way out before thrust back in heavily. Your hands rested against the wall, head hanging as he fucked you slow and hard.

"Missed this, missed you," he mumbled, his voice strained. He picked up the pace, his thrusts becoming quicker — short, sharp bursts that had your body jolting with each thrust. "Gonna fuck you until I'm the only damn thing you can think about."

One of his hands slid up your back, moving to wrap around your throat, hosting you up so your back was flush against his chest. His lips found your neck, kissing a trail of kisses along your and down your shoulder. "Look at you, takin' me so good. Such a good girl, aren't you? Always were."

"Don't stop, please," you begged. "I'm so close."

Those words were his final undoing. His hand that had been around your neck slid down between your legs, his thumb finding your clit, pressing down in rough circles. "Come on, baby. Cum for me, let me feel you."

The whispered words in your ear, the way his cock was driving into you was sending you crazy. Your nails dug into his forearm, your body tensing as your orgasm hit you. You cried out his name, your walls tightening around him. He didn't relent, his cock still pounding into you hard and fast. Three more thrusts and he stilled inside you, a muffled groan of your name against your shoulder as he spilled himself inside you.

Your body went limp against him, the only sounds filling the empty bathroom were your heavy breaths as you both came back down to Earth. He pulled out of you, helping you straighten out your clothes, pulling his own pants back up. He leaned against the wall, hand raking through his hair as he looked over at you, smiling crookedly. "Wasn't exactly planning on fucking you in a bathroom the first time we saw each other again. Wanted to make it special."

"…so romantic," you teased, smiling back at him.

"Yeah, yeah," he blushed. "Was planning on asking you out to dinner and everything."

"Well, you still can."

"Yeah?"

"Ask me," you said softly, stepping forward to smooth out the leather jacket that had been driving you crazy all time.

"Want to go for dinner?" He asked, tucking your hair behind your ear, looking at you nervously as if your answer would be no.

"I'd love to."

Of course you’d end up living in the same damn apartment building as him.

He looked over in your direction. Your hiding place wasn’t really hiding you and he spotted you immediately, raising a brow at the way you had your head peering over your friend's shoulder, ducking down again the second his eyes landed on you. Seunghyun rolled his eyes, a scoff leaving his mouth before he turned and walked off towards the elevator.

“Okay, you have to tell me what the hell that was about!” Your friend said, kicking your front door open to finally place the heavy box they had been holding.

“I hope the wine and glasses were in that box because oof.”

“Who says we need glasses?”

The night was spent on the floor, eating pizza and drinking wine while you told your friend the whole story about Seunghyun. The questions came pouring out (“how did you not know this was his apartment building?” “It wasn’t last time I saw him!"), the chiding that you’d never told them (“can’t believe you hid your hot sneaky link from me, what the hell?) and the apology that now you were living in sheer awkwardness that one of your former flings was now your neighbour. Life really liked to throw the hard stuff your way but you could make it work. It was easy to avoid someone forever, right? Like, how hard could it really be?

Turns out it was very hard. It was a few days later when you next saw him. You had stepped outside your apartment, heading out to the store to pick up some groceries at the same time he walked out of his. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you, an eyebrow lifting.

“Stalking me?” He questioned, hands shoved in his jacket pockets.

You scoffed. “You wish.”

“Yeah, right,” he rolled his eyes. So, he was still bitter about the way you had ended things. That seemed fair but at the same time it really bothered you. You were never anything serious, it wasn’t like you had hurt his feelings, walked out on him like you were in some committed relationship.

“Look, I don’t want to talk to you, you don’t want to talk to me, so let’s just go about our lives without ever talking again.”

“Fine by me.”

He jabbed the button to the elevator with his finger. You let out a deep sigh — guess you’d have to take the stairs. One last look at him and you pushed the door open to the stairway, disappearing and hoping that you never had to speak to him again.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The no speaking rule you had put in place between the two of you was going well. Even if you saw each other in the hallway, it would be a quick glance, an eye roll and you’d move on. As the weeks progressed, the eye rolls seemed to lessen. It even got to a point where you could share the elevator — no words shared between you, both standing at opposite ends of the small metal box but it was civil, if that was even the right word to use. The awkward tension was always still there, lingering whenever the two of you were in the same proximity as each other but for the most part it was bearable. Seunghyun could just be a footnote in your life, someone you had shared a brief encounter with that you wouldn’t remember ten years from now. That was all he was.

Today had been a particularly shitty day. It had been pouring out and, unfortunately, you had forgotten your umbrella so you had turned up to work completely drenched. No matter how much you had tried to dry yourself in the bathroom with the hand dryer, you were still dripping like a wet dog. Then, came the biggest blow. As you sat down at your desk, your boss walked over, asking you to step into their office. A ten minute conversation ensued where you were informed you had been let go — the company was cutting back and needed to lay some people off. You were one of those people. The trudge back to your desk to collect your belongings was mortifying, the pitying looks from your now former co-workers made you want to fall through the Earth. Thankfully, knowing it was raining, you caught a cab home but when you got to your front door, you realised you had lost your keys. You rested your forehead against your front door for a moment, willing yourself not to cry before you slid down the wall, sitting there. You’d have to call someone eventually, someone to let you in and change the locks. But, for now, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. So what if you had to sleep outside in the hallway for one night. It wasn’t like it was the worst thing to happen to you all day.

A loud sigh caught your attention, your eyes flicking up to see Seunghyun looking over at you from his door. He must have just got back from his own job — probably the recording studio. He seemed to think for a moment before he thought against his better judgement and finally spoke.

“What’re you doing?” He asked.

“…I had a really bad day and I’d rather not do this right now. I lost my job, lost my keys, I’d rather not lose my sanity to you,” you sighed, leaning your head back against the wall.

Seunghyun stood there silent for a few moments, sighing once again before he nodded his head in the direction of his apartment. “Come on, you can’t sit out here all night.”

Reluctantly, you got to your feet, following him inside. You were right, this was a different apartment from when you had first met him. He had moved. It seemed like the world was playing games with you with the fact that you had chosen the exact same building to move into. It wasn’t like you could complain right now. He was being… kind. He was letting you into his apartment, extending an olive branch. You wouldn’t admit it out loud but you were thankful.

“Coffee, two sugars and milk?” He asked, drawing your attention back to him.

“You remembered?” You asked, the shock lacing your voice. It wasn’t like it was a very hard way to have your coffee but he had remembered. That made you want to smile but you refused. Not today. Today you were going to bask in your misery, maybe tomorrow you could smile.

He shrugged, playing it off like it was nothing. “It’s what you had every morning.”

Once the coffee was done, he brought it over to you where you had made yourself comfortable on his couch. Your eyes were looking out over the big window panes that lined the wall of his apartment, the Seoul skyline beautifully visible. He had a balcony — you were jealous. To sit out on a balcony, bask in the air and forget life for a bit, that was a dream. With a polite thank you, you took the coffee from him.

Seunghyun sat down in a chair to the side of you, his own mug in his hands. “Have you called anyone about your locks yet?”

“No,” you shook your head. “Wanted to throw a pity party today and deal with it tomorrow.”

“You were going to sleep in the hallway?”

“Yeah.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying his best not to make a snide comment but he could see the hurt, the way the day had taken its toll on you and he couldn't bring himself to do it. “You can stay on the couch tonight. If you want or whatever.”

And, that was the turning point of your relationship.

From then on, the silence turned into civil conversations when you ran into each other. You didn’t stand so far apart from each other in the elevator, he even brought you coffee a couple of mornings as you headed out for your various job interviews. It was strange to be friends. Not in a bad way, it was kind of nice. You had always known he was a good person but now there was no sex involved, you were really getting to know him. The way he liked to goof around and tell jokes, how he always made it his mission to make the people around him smile even at his own expense sometimes. He was… kind, sweet and you’d often find yourself looking forward to the mornings when you ran into him.

Each day that passed, the conversations grew. You learned more about him, the type of person he was. You told him stories about your life, the recent interviews you had. When you were having a bad day, it seemed like seeing him became the one beacon of light that you looked for. It was dangerous the way your heart had started to beat a little faster whenever he smiled at you. Whenever his shoulder accidentally brushed against you, your stomach flipped, aching to feel his touch again.

You were never meant to like him.

But, here you were, pining for the man you had thrown to the side months ago.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“I did it!” You grinned at Seunghyun as he opened his front door, your smile infectious. “I got the job!”

“I knew you would,” he beamed at you. Before he had time to react, you had thrown your arms around him in a hug, the first time you had initiated any contact. Seunghyun had been the first person you had wanted to tell. The second you had got the phone call from the company telling you that they were hiring you, you had dashed out of your apartment straight across to his.

He didn’t hesitate in wrapping his arms around your body, holding you against him. His nose brushed against your hair, his hands firm on you as he held you. The frantic beat of your heart making you dizzy. Being this close to him was making you want to throw all caution to the wind. But, you weren’t sure how he felt. Maybe he didn’t have any feelings towards you anymore. Maybe friendship was all he wanted.

As you pulled back, you met his eyes then your gaze flicked down to his lips. You couldn’t help, couldn’t stop yourself as you leaned in and kissed him. He stood frozen in place for a second before his hand found the small of your back pressing your body flush against him. His free hand came up to cup your cheek, tilting your head back so he could deepen the kiss. It was magical, everything you could have ever wanted and more. But, after a few moments, he seemed to find himself again, taking a step back and putting some distance between you.

“…what are we doing here?” He asked cautiously.

“I… don’t know,” you admitted, wrapping your arms around yourself like a shield.

“You ended things with me because you wanted something more serious. Threw me to the side like nothing without letting me say my piece because if you had, you would’ve known that’s what I wanted to, too. I resented you for that,” he frowned. It didn’t look right on that beautiful face of his.

“What?”

“I liked you. But, you didn’t give me a chance…so why should I now?”

You chewed your bottom lip, eyes moving to look at the ground as you gathered your thoughts. He was right to be guarded. You hadn’t let him say his piece that day, you had just decided yourself but maybe if you had, things would have been different. “I’m sorry. I was careless with your feelings but… I like you, Seunghyun. I like what we have now. You’ve become the best part of my day and if you give me a chance, I’ll prove to you that what happened last time won’t happen again.”

“Fuck it,” he mumbled to himself, taking one long stride and claiming your lips with his again. That was as good of a confirmation as any that he believed you.

Maybe it would crash and burn again but this time, something felt different. Feelings were involved, you had built something different.

It would work out. You knew it.

You went out clubbing with Ji-yong one night. No, you weren’t dating - in fact you recently got engaged to his best friend, Seung-hyun. He proposed to you the day of his new album release and you’ve been over the moon since. You’ve been dating for almost 7 years.

After a rough week at work, all you wanted to do is go clubbing and get a little tipsy. Seung-hyun didn’t feel like going, but he didn’t want you to get drunk on your own. And so you went with Ji-yong. It wasn’t the first time and he was a great guardian, too. But his alcohol tolerance has dropped significantly over the years - and so did yours.

Two cocktails in each, you got very handsy. One song in particular, I Wanna be Your Slave by Maneskin, spurred you on. By the end of the song, you were making out with Ji-yong - back against a wall, arms wrapped around his neck, his leg between yours, letting you grind against his thigh. You could taste the cigarette on his tongue he smoked earlier. He holds your cheek and pulls away in shock and embarrassment.

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s my fault, too.” -you look away. “Let’s just text Seung-hyun and tell him the place sucks and we wanna go home.” -Ji-yong looked at you in question. “Not to yours!”

“Right!” -he bites his lip and covers his face in embarrassment. He couldn’t believe he let this happen and that he immediately wondered if you’d go back to his. Of course, you wouldn’t. You were engaged and this was a drunken slip up! You looked great though - thigh-high boots, fishnet tights, a denim miniskirt and a sequin, V-neck top.

Seung-hyun texted back that he’s gonna get a taxi and meet you two there. You agreed. To deal with the shitshow of a situation, you decided the best idea was to down two more drinks - but no more dancing. As you and Ji-yong walked out of the club, the heel of your boot got caught. You snicker, as he helps you stay on your feet. Your eyes meet. There’s no denying, you feel the heat grow between your thighs. You lean in for a kiss.

“What, you wanna get caught?” -he whispers, but it’s teasing rather than reprimanding. You weren’t the only one who thought another drink after kissing would be smart. You bite his lower lip as a response, keeping eye contact. “You’re horrible.” -he says and gives in. This time he wraps your legs around his waist and you make out full of desire - even when the taxi with Seung-hyun in it pulls up.

“Give me a second.” -Seung-hyun tells the taxi driver. He is annoyed but he shows calm and collected demeanor. He gets out of the car and slams its door as loud as humanly possible. You and Ji-yong jump apart at the loud noise. “Oh, I’m sorry for the intrusion(!)”

“Babe, I’m so sorry, I can expl-” -you try. You feel your eyes stinging, the tears threatening to escape, but he cuts you off.

“Don’t you dare crying.” -he rolls his eyes at you. “Get in the taxi. You, too!” -he addresses Ji-yong.

The two of you quietly get in the back seat - you scoot as far as possible from Ji-yong, while Seung-hyun takes the passenger seat. He doesn’t say a word. You wish he was screaming or breaking up with you! But this?! This is the worst! The drive home is quiet, except for your occasional sniffs. You cry quietly in the corner - the taxi driver hands you a tissue. You wipe off your smeared mascara and mess of a lipstick. You feel and look horrible.

The three of you sit on Seung-hyun’s couch. Ji-yong on the left, you in the middle and Seung-hyun, with a glass of wine in his hand, on the right.

“Baby, I’m so so sorry….” -you try again, but he just lifts his hand in a stopping motion. He doesn’t care.

“Kiss him again.”

“W-What?” -you look between the two of them, about to give yourself a whiplash. “No!”

“Hyung, come on!” -Ji-yong takes your side. “It was a drunken mistake!”

“I didn’t ask.” -Seung-hyun chuckles, having a sip of his wine then elegantly placing the glass on the coffee table. “You have my full consent.” -he shrugs. “Just kiss!”

“No, you cannot pimp me out like th-!” -you argue, but you get cut off. Ji-yong kisses you. Your initial reaction is to slap him across the face. “What the fuck?!”

“Hey!” -he sits back, holding his face.

“Tsk, what a mean, little brat.” -Seung-hyun sighs. “This is what I’m expecting, ok?” -he pulls Ji-yong close by the back of his head. And kisses him! A real French kiss, tongue action and all. Your eyes grow as big as saucers. Two of the hottest men you know are making out practically on your lap. And they’re both enjoying it - the symphony of their groans and whimpers make it evident. Seung-hyun shoves his hand in Ji-yong’s pants. His hands move in a familiar motion - he’s pumping Ji-yong’s cock. “Mm, you’re getting hard already? Is that for me or for her?” -he asks in a hush tone.

“Both…” -Ji-yong gulps with reddened cheeks, biting his lower lip, trying to keep his composure.

“See?” -Seung-hyun looks at you.

“Are you trying to tell me you’re gay?!” -you burst out the question.

“No.” -he sits back, wiping Ji-yong’s kiss off his lips. “I fuck you nice and good every night, aren’t I? I can’t be gay.”

“Okay, fine! Whatever!” -your head is spinning. What in the explicit version of Haru Haru is going on?! You need to have a long and thorough discussion with your man. You need answers! You want to understand your own relationship! Only if Ji-yong wasn’t kissing your neck, tenderly sucking on your sweet spot. “Ji! I’m trying to talk to my fiance here…” -you make more moans than sense. “Please…” -your pleas are ignored. Ji-yong pulls you on his lap. With a clouded mind and half-lidded eyes, you kiss him. Rough and passionate - like your finance wanted you to.

“That’s more like it.” -you hear him mutter under his breath, unbuckling his belt.

You hum feeling Ji-yong’s soft lips on your exposed neck, smiling with your eyes closed. He’s nipping more at your skin than you’re used to, which makes your skin tingle.

“Don’t mark her, man!” -Seung-hyun chuckles. You look at him - his cock is half-erect and in his hand, pulling the skin back and forth on it. Him giving himself a handjob while watching his best friend going at it with you is diabolical. He blows you a kiss. You can’t help but blush. You feel Ji-yong’s fingers on your clothed clit. You let out a gasp and your hip involuntarily bucks into his tentative touch. Your panties are already soaked, you wouldn’t need long to come undone. “And don’t make her cum!” -you frown at Seung-hyun, annoyed that he wouldn’t let you cum. “You don’t deserve it, princess. Not yet anyway...” -he captures your lips in a soul searing kiss. Your hands move from Ji-yong to your fiance. You feel his lips curling into a smile. Then he grips into your hair and forces you on your knees on the couch. “It isn’t gonna suck itself.” -he grins and drives his full length down to the back of your throat. “That’s for being a cheating, little slut tonight.” -you are struggling to breathe. Meanwhile, Ji-yong is touching himself at the sight. His jeans are too tight to contain himself. Seeing you getting railed in the mouth brings back memories for him. He remembers the hot and heavy nights he and Seung-hyun used to spend together. Seung-hyun loved being rough with him, too - and he enjoyed being destroyed… mouth or ass. “Don’t think you’re off the hook yet, either!” -Seung-hyun pulls you off his cock with a loud pop. You cough, a string of saliva connecting your agape mouth to his cock. “I’m sure she’ll be happy to share.” -he pats your cheek. “You will, won’t you?” -you nod. “Good girl.”

Ji-yong kneels on the carpet in front of your fiance. He hasn’t done anything with Seung-hyun for so long - out of respect for you. But he missed his best friend more than anything. After he gets rid of Seung-hyun’s pants and boxers, he grabs the base, opens his mouth wide with a flat tongue and takes your fiance’s entire cock. He’s almost putting you to shame! “Ah, that’s it, Ji!” -Seung-hyun grabs his hair. “Keep going, man!” -he groans. Ji-yong continues to bob his head and slobber on his dick, like he was dying to get a taste. The scene is so hot, you feel your pussy pulse between your legs - but you can’t help feeling a little jealous, too. It should be you making your man loose his fine shit over a blowjob. You force Ji-yong off. You look up at Seung-hyun, as you lick his shaft, from balls to tip, swirling your tongue around the opening before deepthroating him, while your hand plays with his balls. “Fuck…” -he groans and pulls away. “Don’t make me cum, princess.” -you and Ji-yong look at each other. The two of you share and start working on him gently. Soft kisses, innocent licks and flicks, and the most delicate touches. Seung-hyun hums and pants. He can hardly believe this is happening to him. He rubs Ji-yong’s cheek. “Come here!” -Ji-yong practically shoots up in a standing position. The two of them kiss again, hungrier and more passionate than before. You pull back to let them have a moment. They fall on the couch. Seung-hyun pulls Ji-yong on his lap. Ji-yong seems even smaller and more desperate now. Their kiss has so much history. They discard their clothes until they’re both naked in each others’ arms.

“I missed this… I missed you…” -Ji-yong moans breathlessly. “Fuck…” -he’s pumping your fiance’s cock with both hands. Seung-hyun returns the handjob, circling around the head with his thumb.

“As hard as I remembered.” -he groans, biting down Ji-yong’s neck, turning him into an even bigger, shaking mess. You lean close to Seung-hyun:

“And you dared to call me a cheating, little slut, huh? You’re a bigger slut than I am.”

“What can I say?” -he muses. “I was worried you two would hook me up without me.” -his hand slips between your thighs. You’re drenched! “Someone needs a hand, hm? Or a tongue?” -you moan, leaning into his touch. “Wanna taste her?” -he asks his friend. “She’s a mess.”

You’ve been hot and bothered ever since Ji-yong kissed at the club tonight and the evening just kept piling on it. You shuffle around, changing your positions: Ji-yong lies on his back, with you hovering over his face. He rips your tights open over your aching core for better access. He pushes your lace panties out of the way and buries his face in your pussy.

“Oh, fuck!” -you shriek. You understand why Seung-hyun enjoyed the blow job. “Don’t stop, Ji… fuck! Let me cum!”

“You heard the lady.” -Seung-hyun gives him the green light. “Let her cum.”

“She tastes like honey.” -Ji-yong murmurs and shoves two digits in your seeping core.

“So do you.” -Seung-hyun kisses along Ji-yong’s rock hard cock and slips a finger in his ass.

“Shit…!”

“Just enjoy.” -he orders and starts sucking off his best friend, bobbing his head with utter expertise. Not only Ji-yon enjoys the blowjob, he pumps hard and steady, while his tongue circles around your clit sensually. The coil is about to snap in you.

“Fuck! Harder, Ji! That’s i-... Ahh!” -your body quivers as your orgasm sweeps over you. Ji-yong lets you ride out your high on his face. “Oh, my God…” -you pant, holding onto the back of the couch, catching your breath. What just happened?

Seung-hyun lets go of Ji-yong’s shaft with a loud popping sound. One more kiss on Ji-yong’s toned stomach and his attention is back to you. He helps you out of your ripped tights, skirt and top. There you were, standing naked in front of him - in front of them. You face him, as he pulls you close by the small of your back.

“Lie down.” -he kisses your forehead. You do as you’re told and spread your legs. He licks his lips seeing your glistening pussy. Knowing Ji-yong ate you out a minute ago makes his cock twitch. He lines himself at your entrance. With one determined thrust, he bottoms out. You cry out in both pleasure and pain. His girth stretches you just right. “You’re so wet and tight…” -he pants. “Fit me like a glove.” -he pulls out a little and slams back into you again. You arch your back, begging for him to take you, but he has another idea. “Shut her up!” -he orders Ji-yong. With fluttering eyes, you look at Ji-yong. He gives you his famous, gummy smile. A wicked grin. He’s already naked, pumping his rock hard cock in his hand.

“Suck it like you mean it.” -he presses it against your lips. There’s no time to think. You let your head slightly dangle off the couch for an easier reach. You want to thank him for that orgasm. You start pumping him as you slurp on his balls. “Fuck! You naughty little bitch!” -he groans and kneads one of your boobs. You let out a moan. “You like it? How about this?” -he pinches and twists a nipple. It just spurs you on. You suck one of his balls into your mouth. “Come here!” -he grabs you by the base of your head, thumbs under your jaw, and drives his dick in your open mouth - deep! You relax your throat letting him go as rough as he likes. Seung-hyun picks up the pace between your legs. His grip tightens on your hips as he drills into you harder now. You can’t scream from Ji-yong’s length but he knows you are close - nails digging into the cushion and arched back never lie. Skin slapping against skin, he becomes rough and merciless. Each thrust feels deeper, teasing your G-spot.

Stars start to appear as Seung-hyun and Ji-yong both fuck you into the next world: when one pulls back, the other pushes in and when the other pulls back, one pushes in. Just like their rap lines, they are in perfect sync - they don’t miss a beat. You can’t hold your composure any longer. Your cryless euphoric state is evident to the both of them. Seung-hyun feels your walls squeeze around him, while Ji-yong feels your muffled moans vibrate on his cock. They both watch your body spasm involuntarily as the hot, white pleasure washes over you.

They turned you into a disheveled, whimpering mess. Ji-yong lets up first, then Seung-hyun follows suit. You can barely sit straight - your throat and jaw hurt and you’re still shaking from the intensity of your orgasm.

They’re both gentle now. Soft kisses peppered on your cheeks, neck and shoulders. Gentle and tender touches against your skin. You smile with your eyes closed, hugging them close - not caring who you’re making out with. It’s all a blur. You’re all one person.

You don’t know when Seung-hyun left or where he pulled the lube from, but he has it in his hands.

“Hyung… let me feel her.” - Ji-yong addresses your fiance. He chuckles.

“What, you want to fuck her? Be my guest.” -he kisses Ji-yong, then adds in a low tone. “I was gonna take your ass anyway.”

Ji-yong pushes you on the couch - facing him. His hair is a mess, his cheeks gone red and sweat covers his chest. He teases your throbbing clit with his thick cock before he slides between your fold. You arch your back - he feels just as good as your fiance.

“You’re so tight, (Y/n)...” -he pants as he grabs your hip. At this point, you know you’ll be bruised by their rough handling. “Nice and fucking tight…”

You sit up to lick his pecks, but your fiance grabs your hair.

“Don’t make me jealous now.” -he kisses your cheek. You gulp, but he just rolls his eyes at you - he was teasing. “My horny little slut.” -he gives you a quick but fierce kiss, then steps behind Ji-yong. He whispers something in his ear that you can’t quite make out. But the next minute Ji-yong moans and his face falls forward. “Always so dramatic…!” -Seung-hyun grabs his short hair from the back and pulls his head up. “I told you. I was gonna take your ass.” -you can feel your fiance’s next thrust into Ji-yong in your own core. You both moan out loud. You never thought Ji-yong was so vocal. But Seung-hyun was on the larger side - the whimpers and curses were justified. Ji-yong missed and loved this pain - the pain mixed with pleasure.

“Could have at least warned me!” -he hisses as he adjusts to Seung-hyun’s size.

“I thought you loved surprises.”

“Not the ones up my ass!”

“You didn’t change one bit.” -Seung-hyun chuckles, but hugs his friend by the waist from behind. Once again, you pull away from the action and choose to watch them instead. All these years, you had no idea - they were extremely discreet about their past - but here you are watching them from the front row seat. Seung-hyun’s hand creeps up to Ji-yong’s neck, while the other keeps him grounded. His lips kiss the shell of Ji-yong’s ear and trail down his neck to his slim shoulder. You look at them propped on your elbow against the back of the couch, mouth agape and eyes wide.

“Jealous?” -your fiance winks at you. You are - at least a little bit - but you’re not gonna admit it. With tinted cheeks, you are glued to them. It’s hot and steamy.

“Play with my nipples.” -Ji-yong whines. “Please, hyung!”

Seung-hyun does as asked. He rubs Ji-yong’s nipple between his thumb and index.

“Like that?”

“Fuck, perfect!” -he pants.

“Wanna cum for me? For old times’s sake?” -Seung-hyun starts pumping Ji-yong’s cock.

“Can I cum in her?” -he asks, his eyes shut tight. Really? He’s asking for you? Seung-hyun is a little stunned. He looks at you, then back at his friend.

“My dick is not enough, you need my fiancee’s tight hole around your cock, too, hmm? What a slut.” -he turns Ji-yong's head just enough to shove his tongue down his throat. “I love it.” -they share a devious smile and turn to you in question. You nod, barely registering what’s going on, and turn around - face down, ass up. “Fuck her good, ok?” -Seung-hyun tightens his grip on Ji-yong’s throat. He spanks your ass and starts off slow, enjoying your warm, tight pussy around his cock once more. The pace isn’t fast, but he is making you moan with each thrust - you’re getting closer. Another spank, but it’s not your butt - it’s Seung-hyun spanking Ji-yong.

“Ji, please… harder!” -you plea. He rocks his hips quicker and harder into your warmth - because your fiance has picked up the pace. You know it from experience, this is Seung-hyun. He’s fucking Ji-yong at ruthless speed - that you get to endure second-hand.

Ji-yong writhes and spills his load in your cunt between curses. You bury your face into a cushion to muffle your screams. Seung-hyun’s animalistic groans bounce off the wall as he’s dissolved into pleasure, too. Two flaccid lengths and one dripping core. You’re all spent, gasping for air, with heaving chests and trembling bodies, coming off your high. The atmosphere is hot, stuffy and sticky.

As you lie there on the couch, your pussy still throbbing, you drift off to sleep. You feel being scooped up and being carried to bed. But when you’re in bed, you feel being hugged from each side.

What am I marrying into? -you smile, hoping this won’t be the last threesome between you.

Masterlist

Taglist: @bettelaboure @flymetothexmoon @nerdydoll-com @ldydeath @finallyremembered @cybertempo @breakmeoff @wcnderlnds @youlikeex @moontabi @djarindroid @moonqz @makeitworse @thanosspills @lunaryoongie @menacingvoid @moon-topttt

It was two days before he had to leave for tour. The anxiety running through you was at an all time high but Seunghyun knew. He always seemed to. As he lay on top of you, pressing kisses to your neck on the couch, he lifted his head up, smoothing some of your hair back from your face. “What’s wrong?”

“Huh?” You asked, slightly dazed from the trail his lips had been leaving.

“You’re with me but you’re not. Talk to me.” His voice was so soft, his eyes looking at you full of concern.

You shifted beneath him, hands resting on his biceps. With a sigh, you finally spoke. “It’s nothing.”

“Not nothing. It's never nothing. Can I take a guess?”

“Sure, detective.”

“I think you’re scared that I’m leaving in a couple of days and it’s weighing on your mind what’s going to happen with us,” he said, catching your eyes as you tried to look away from him. He had hit the nail on the head.

“You really are a detective. How are you so good at reading me?” You laughed nervously.

“I just know you,” he said softly, his hand cupping your cheek, turning your face so you’d look at him. “But, baby, let me tell you that nothing is going to happen with us. I’m in this for the long run. You and me? That’s all I care about. I don’t want you getting lost in your head about that. I’m crazy about you. So damn crazy and I won’t let anything ruin what we have. I promise you that.”

“But…” you started but he cut you off.

“But nothing. I promise you, okay? Trust me. It’s you and me for as long as you’ll have me. No matter the distance or anything else that gets in the way.”

“I trust you.”

A dazzling smile graced his face as he leant down and captured your lips in a mindblowing kiss. His lips moved gently against yours, his hand sliding down to grip at your hips, pulling you flush against him. “Good, now that you’re back with me, let me show you exactly how much you mean to me.”

He deepens the kiss, his tongue slipping past your lips to tangle with yours. You moaned against him, arching up into him. Seunghyun ground his hips against yours, the outline of his cock pressing against your core through your clothes. You needed it again so you moved your hips against his, faster this time to which he returned the favour, his hand holding your hips down as he grinded himself against you. A low groan passed his lips, his cock growing harder and harder with the friction. He wanted to take his time, to savour you but right now all he wanted was you. He left your lips, moving down your body until his face was between your thighs. His fingers deftly pulled down your sweatpants you’d been wearing after work, tugging them off and tossing them down to the floor. His tongue darted out, licking a long stripe against you through your panties. You whimpered, eyes glancing down to meet his.

“Don’t tease,” you said.

He just grinned, his fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties and within the next second they were on the ground with the rest of your clothes. He leaned back in, his tongue teasingly licking a stripe along your folds making you groan in frustration. Then, his lips sealed around your clit and you moaned, the sound echoing off the walls of the living room. His tongue worked against you alternating between licking along you then teasing your clit. It was a beautiful kind of torture. Your hands had tangled in his hair, holding him between your legs as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. When the tip of his tongue dipped inside your entrance, you let out a high pitched whine, hips bucking hard into his face. He kept it up fucking you with his tongue until he felt you right there on the edge. His lips found your clit once more and that was it, you were moaning out, hands tugging at his hair as your orgasm hit you. He lapped every drop up, savouring the taste, riding out your release with you. When he sat back up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he had the biggest grin on his face.

“You’re so pretty when you cum,” he said, his deep voice even lower.

“Only then?” You teaseed, sitting up and pushing him back into the couch until he was properly sitting down. You climbed on to his lap, grinding yourself against him, the fabric of his jeans catching on your sensitive clit with each draw of your hips.

“Always,” he groaned. He pulled off your shirt, his own following shortly after. Your hands worked to free him from his jeans, lifting your hips to tug them down just enough to free his cock. You took him in your hand, palm sliding against him from base to tip, teasing him like he’d teased you. “Payback?”

“No. I’m too desperate right now,” you laughed breathlessly, lining him up with your entrance. When you sank down onto him, his hands flew to your hips, fingers digging him tightly as you took him inch by inch. Your hands rested on his shoulders, eyes closed as you finally sat fully on his length. He was so deep like this, you could feel every inch inside you and it was amazing.

You lifted your hips, sliding back down. Seunghyun guided you, his hands helping slam you back down onto him. The past was quick, desperate — passionate. He couldn’t get enough of you, his eyes focused on watching as you rode him. The pleasure was building fast, his hips now snapping up to meet each of your downward movements. Your moans only spurred him on until he stopped your movements, pounding up into you to drive you both to your release.

“Cum for me again, baby,” he breathed, eyebrows scrunched together as he felt his own release ready to burst.

There was no room to even speak, the way he was driving into you was overwhelming and before you knew it, your second release arrived. You cried out his name and, at the same time, he thrust up into you one final time, spilling himself deep inside you. Your head fell onto his shoulder, your breath coming out in short, sharp gasps. Seunghyun pressed kisses all over your cheek, shoulder, any piece of skin he could get to as you both came down.

“Come with me,” he said quietly.

“What?” You asked, confused.

“On tour.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really. I know it’ll be hard to leave the store but you can always come back whenever you want and I’m sure Yuri wouldn’t mind taking care of it while you’re away. It’s up to you, baby, but I want you there,” he pulled your head from his shoulder, cupping your face with both of his hands. “Whatever decision you make, I support.”

There was a beat of silence before you spoke.

“Okay.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── 

Yuri had taken no convincing whatsoever to look after the shop for you while you were away. You had promised her you’d be back in a few weeks to check on things — you didn’t want to leave her alone for too long, after all. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust her, you just knew how hard it could be running the place by yourself and you didn’t want to stress her out. The excitement you had about taking a vacation, getting to see Seunghyun on stage and spending time with him was through the roof. But, there were also nerves because you’d be meeting the rest of his bandmates. You knew how much they all meant to him. They had to like you, you wanted them to. From what you knew and from what Seunghyun had told you, they were all great guys.

Now, here you were, in the city for the first step of the tour. You were sharing a hotel room with Seunghyun even though he had asked you if you’d wanted your own but you’d much rather be with him. He was always so thoughtful, always making sure to think of you when he made every decision. It was like your feelings mattered to him more than his own which was funny because his always mattered to you more.

Meeting the rest of the guys had gone smoothly. They had welcomed you with open arms, making jokes about how happy Seunghyun was, meaning he was extra annoying. You had been nervous for no reason at all. They made sure to include you in conversation. Jiyong, who you knew was Seunghyun’s best friend, was extra kind to you. Maybe he could sense how anxious you were. You couldn’t have been more thankful for how welcoming they were. Your worries had been for nothing — you were one of them now.

While the boys were in rehearsal, you had gone back to the hotel to freshen up and get ready for the show. That gave them time to talk. During a break, they sat backstage, Seunghyun sat on one of the couches with a bottle of water in one hand and his phone in the other as he texted you.

“I’ve never seen you like this,” Jiyong commented with a grin, flopping down on the couch next to his best friend.

“Like what?” Seunghyun asked, not looking up from his phone.

“In love,” Jiyong teased, elbowing him in the side. “It looks good on you. Have you told her yet?”

“Told her what?”

“Oh my god, you’re so slow,” Jiyong groaned. “That you love her.”

“Well, kind of. I said I was falling in love with her but I haven’t really said the three words.”

“But you want to?”

“Of course he does! He has the dreamy eyes every time he looks at her,” Daesung chimed in from across the room.

“He wants to looooove her and marry her and have a bunch of annoying little Seunghyun babies,” Youngbae teased, earning the middle finger from Seunghyun.

“Of course I want to tell her,” Seunghyun said, focusing his attention back on Jiyong. “I just don’t know how.”

“Well… just do the same thing you’ve done every time you’ve told her something else. With roses,” Youngbae offered, perching himself on the arm of the couch with a knowing smile. “I think she’d appreciate that.”

“Yeah,” Seunghyun smiled to himself. Of course. That was the perfect way to tell you he was madly in love with you. Now, all he had to do was make sure this bouquet was the best one yet. “I think she would.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── 

What Seunghyun didn’t know was that you hadn’t gone straight back to the hotel. While you had been with the guys, you had talked to Youngbae — he was the one who you had connected with the most — and told him that you wanted to tell Seunghyun how you felt. You had told him all about the roses the two of you had given each other through your relationship. It seemed like every bouquet he had given you (and the one you had given him) signified an important milestone in the road of your relationship. Youngbae had told you that maybe that was the way to tell him. The other bouquet you had given him had gone down so well, you figured that this one would, too.

So, you had made a pit stop at a local flower shop you had found thanks to Google Maps. Going in there, seeing all the flowers, you felt at home. It had only been a day and you already missed your little shop. Not just because of how much hard work you had put into it but because now, it held so many good memories for you. It had been the place you had first met Seunghyun. That was the day everything had changed for you. This man had helped piece you back together more than you’d ever be able to tell him.

With the bouquet in your hand, you headed back to the hotel to finally get ready for the show. Your nerves were back but this time not in a bad way. It was more of a giddy sort of way. You didn’t have any fears that he didn’t feel the same way; he had told you he was falling in love with you so that wasn’t why you were nervous. You were nervous because this meant that you were finally giving yourself to someone, opening up so completely and that was scary. To let someone in like that was the hardest thing someone could do but you knew Seunghyun was worth it. Ever since you had met him he had been nothing but kind and caring, you knew he would never break your heart.

A shower and an hour of trying to find the perfect outfit later, you're back at the arena. Seunghyun had made sure all the security knew exactly who you were and to let you in. As you found the boys dressing room, you knocked on the door. It was a few seconds later when Seunghyun opened it. The roses you had were held behind your back.

“Look at you!” He smiled, leaning in to press a quick kiss to your lips. “Come in. The other guys have gone to get something to eat.”

“You're not hungry?” You asked, shuffling nervously on your feet.

“They said they’d bring me something back. Speaking of,” he turned towards the couch, grabbing something off it and hiding it behind his back. “I have something for you.”

“I have something for you, too,” you smiled nervously.

“On three?”

“Let's go.”

Seunghyun counted down from three and, at the same time, you both produced a bouquet of red roses. Seunghyun’s was a lot bigger, a few of the other coloured roses he had gifted you over the last few months mixed in with them. You could feel your eyes watering, tears already forming. A small giggle fell from your lips, a laugh from Seunghyun. You held yours out for him, taking the ones he had got for you. You looked at them, feeling an overwhelming sense of happiness. He had put so much thought into it.

“I guess we both had the same idea,” he laughed, placing his bouquet down gently on a small table to the side of the room, stepping closer to you to take yours and placing them down, too. His hands then found yours, locking your fingers together, his thumb running over the skin of your hand. “This is the part where I’d usually ask for a lesson on what the colour of the roses mean but… I think I’ve got this one.”

“Go ahead,” you urged gently, giving his hands a squeeze.

“Red roses mean love. A deep, romantic, passionate love. And, that’s exactly how I feel about you. I love you. Ever since the moment you stepped into my life, I’ve felt this undeniable pull towards you. The more time we spend together, the stronger it gets. That’s what those roses mean. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” you smiled softly, feeling the tears falling down your cheeks now. You stood up on your tip-toes, kissing him. Life hadn’t always been kind to you but now you had found your person. The one who had helped piece you back together and heal.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── 

TWO YEARS LATER.

You trudged up the path, holding your white dress up so it didn’t trail in the dirt — not that you cared if it did, someone would be able to fix it when you got to the venue. But, right now, this was a stop you had to make. If you were about to have the most important day of your life, you had to talk to the most important person in yours. Crouching down, you were face to face with your father’s grave, your hand reaching out to dust off the headstone. With a shaky breath, you began to speak.

“Hey, dad. I’m getting married today. I wish you could’ve met Seunghyun. You would’ve loved him. He takes care of me and makes me feel so loved. It’s been a long time since I’ve had anyone so fiercely by my side, supporting me like he does. I just wanted to come and let you know so you can get a front row seat. I know you’ll be watching and smiling down at me. I wish so badly you could be here but you’ll always be in my heart. I’m happy. I’m really happy. And, I hope you are, too. I love you,” you kissed two of your fingers, resting them on the gravestone. A few minutes later, you got to your feet, wiping at your eyes.

“You ready?” Youngbae called from the car. You nodded, taking his hand as he helped you inside. “Come on, let's get you married, Mrs Choi.”

It had been a few days since you had last seen Seunghyun. You missed him. More than you thought you would. It had been such a long time since you’d been in a relationship, you forgot what it was like to miss someone like this. All through the day he was all you could think about. Any time someone came in to buy some roses, the only thought occupying your mind was all the times he’d surprised you with them. Now, more often than not, you wore a smile on your face. Gone were the days of waking up and feeling like the world had put a permanent dark cloud above your head. There were still days where everything felt too much but on those days, Seunghyun was always there ready to catch you before you could spiral. You owed him so much. This beautiful man had come into your life and flipped it upside down all for the better.

It was a slow day at work — it usually picked up during the evening once people were out of work so while you were busy tidying up some of the displays, an idea hit you. Seunghyun had always been the one to give you things and you had yet to get him anything. Any time you insisted on paying for lunch, he’d wave you off. But, now, he wasn’t here and you could do at least something for him.

It wasn’t often that men were gifted flowers and knowing how much Seunghyun appreciated the beauty in things, you had no doubt he’d love a nice bouquet. So, you got to work. You moved to the display of roses, picking out a dozen burgundy coloured ones. You were sure he wouldn’t know what they meant but explaining would be the fun part. You tied them all together, picking all of his favourite colours as you arranged it making sure the bouquet was perfect and took it upstairs to give to him later.

The hours seemed to drag by slowly but just before closing time Seunghyun showed up, leaning over the counter to press a soft, slow kiss to your lips. Your eyes closed in content the second his lips met yours, your hands aching to pull him in closer to deepen the kiss but you couldn’t. Not here at least. When he pulled back, he smiled softly at you, his thumb grazing your cheek.

“I missed you today,” he said.

“I missed you, too. How were rehearsals?" 

“Fine but I couldn’t stop thinkin’ about you the whole time.”

“Is that so?” You grinned, stepping from behind the counter to move over to change the sign to closed. Once you locked the door, you turned back to Seunghyun. “I’ve been thinking about  you all day. So much in fact, I have a gift for you.”

Seunghyun raised his eyebrows. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” you took his hand, leading him to the stairs up to your apartment. “But you have to come upstairs for it.”

He didn’t question it, letting you lead him up the stairs and into your apartment. Once the door had closed behind the two of you, you let go of his hand. He watched as you made your way over to your kitchen counter,picking up the bouquet of burgundy roses you’d made up earlier. Holding them out to him, you felt a little nervous but the second he took them from you with that gentle smile, you breathed a sigh of relief. He looked at them then back at you, his eyes meeting yours.

“These are beautiful. Just like you,” he shot a wink at you which made you blush. Even now after all these weeks of knowing him, one compliment from him made you weak at the knees. “I expect a lesson on what this colour means, by the way.”

“Perfect because…” you carefully took the roses from his hands, placing them back down on the counter then you placed your hands on his chest, feeling his heart beat through his shirt against your palms. “I planned on showing you exactly what they mean.”

Seunghyun opened his mouth to ask you what you meant but before he could even speak, your lips were on his. It was a slow, passionate kiss, your hands snaking around his neck, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. His hands rested on your waist, pulling you flush against his body so there was no space between you. He tilted your head, his tongue tracing along your bottom lip causing you to open your mouth, tongues meeting in their familiar dance. Your hands slid down, pulling at the hem of his shirt. Reluctantly, he broke the kiss so you could lift the fabric up and over his head, tossing it to the floor. It was like a messy dance as his lips claimed yours yet again, hands pulling at each other's clothes leaving a trail on the way to the bedroom. At one point, both shirtless, you braless and left in nothing but your shorts, you gently pushed him against the wall, hand sliding down to cup his bulge through his jeans. 

“Baby…” he groaned against your lips, hips bucking into your hand.

“Shh, let me show you exactly what those roses meant,” you whispered, kissing him once more before slowly getting down to your knees.

He watched with hooded eyes as you unbuttoned his jeans, pulling down the zippers and tugging both them and his boxers down in one fell swoop. His cock sprang out, already hard and aching. Not wanting to waste any more time, you wrapped your hand around the base giving him a few pumps before lowering your mouth. You started off small, tongue darting out to lick at the tip, swallowing the precum that had already been leaking. Then, you wrapped your lips around it, sucking briefly, earning a groan from Seunghyun who threw his head back against the wall. His hands instinctively moved to your head, fingers tangling in your hair as you took him deeper. With your tongue on the underside of his cock, you began to bob your head, taking as much of him into your mouth as you could. Your hand slowly rubbed up and down the bit you couldn’t fit. Seunghyun couldn’t help it, his hips thrust to meet your bobbing. When the head of his cock hit the back of your throat and you gagged, he let out the most beautiful moan. You already knew your panties were drenched just from listening to the sounds he was making. As you went to take him even further, he stopped you.

“If you keep doing that, I’m not going to last,” he panted, fighting all the restraint in the world to pull himself away from your mouth. As much as he wanted to finish in your mouth, he wanted to be inside you more. 

As you got back to your feet, Seunghyun wrapped his arms around you, lifting you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist, his lips back on yours as he carried you through to the bedroom. The urgency was kicked up a notch now as he threw you down onto the mattress, climbing on top of you.  His jeans were long forgotten in the hallway, his hands moving to rid you of your shorts.

“Your so fucking beautiful,” he hummed against your skin, his lips leaving a trail of kisses all the way down to your brests. While his fingers worked on ridding you of your last remaining clothes, his lips sealed around one of your nipples causing you to gasp and arch up into his mouth. “Yeah, keep making those pretty little noises for me, baby.”

You lifted your hips up so he could pull down your shorts and panties, finally, finally, leaving you bare. His fingers dipped between your legs, running through your folds, coating themselves in your slick. You were so ready for him. His thumb rubbed circles against your clit as he slipped two fingers easily inside you. “This all for me?”

“Yes,” you gasped as he curled his fingers inside you. “All for you. Always for you.”

“That’s my good girl.”

A few more pumps of his fingers and, with a whine from you, he was pulling them from you. His hand that was coated in your slick, grabbed his cock, running it along your drenched folds. You whined once again, bucking your hips to try and notch him inside you. He only smirked, claiming your lips in a messy kiss – all teeth and tongue. 

“Tell me what you want,” he said huskily, his cock notched at your entrance, the tip pushed in the tiniest amount just to tease you.

“Fuck me, Seunghyun. Please,” you begged. He braced himself over you, one hand resting beside your head, the other firmly gripping your hips.

Inch by inch he slid into you, a groan emitting from his lips as he bottomed out. You gasped, hands flying to his back to hold on, nails digging into his skin. Then, he moved. He slid out slowly then pushed back in with a hard thrust. Your head fell back into the pillows, breathy moans falling from your lips as he pulled all the way out then thrust back in – setting a slow, hard pace. It was beautiful finally feeling him this way. You could feel every drag of his cock along your walls, your hips moving to meet his.

“You feel so good,” he moaned, his head in the crook of your nick, nipping at the skin there. “So tight and wet. You’re taking me so well, baby.”

“Faster, please,” you whimpered, your legs coming to wrap around him trying to draw him in deeper.

Both of his hands now rested on your hips, anchoring you to the mattress as he picked up the pace. You could feel your body jolting with each thrust, your moans echoing off the walls of the room. The neighbours would surely have something to say tomorrow but you didn’t care. Your nails raked down his back, leaving your own marks on his skin. He let out a hiss, the feeling only spurring him on, thrusts becoming harder.

You could feel the telltale signs of your orgasm approaching, that coil tightening inside you. He knew you were close, feeling your walls tighten around him. His thrusts turned short and fast, his own release on the edge of bursting.

“Seunghyun!” You cried out, your body arching into his as you finally came. You dug your nails into his back, his name falling like a prayer from your lips.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum…” He grunted, his hands pinning your hips to the mattress. 

“Inside me. Fill me up,” you whispered, still dazed from your release.

Those were all the words he needed to hear – one last deep thrust and he stilled, pouring his release inside you with a long, drawn out moan. He rolled his hips shallowly, making sure you got every last drop before he collapsed on top of you. The only sound occupying the room were your heavy breaths. Neither of you spoke for a moment, trying to get your bearings.

“If that’s what those roses meant, I’m going to have to get you a whole lot of ‘em,” he chuckled, pressing a lingering kiss to your lips. He pulled out of you with a hiss, falling on to the mattress next to you. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you into his side.

“You don’t need roses to make that happen again,” you laughed, pressing a small kiss to his chest.

“Good to know.” His hand ran gently through your hair, a content sigh coming from him. “I think I might be falling in love with you.

Silence.

Then, you spoke in the softest voice he’d ever heard.

“I think I might be falling in love with you, too.”

CH 1

The studio entryway is lined with old photographs. As you enter you walk slow, admiring the moments frozen in time. A grainy group photo catches your eye. A 20 year old version of yourself stares back at you accompanied by your fellow dancers with a pre-debut BIGBANG at the center. Seeing their oversized clothes and toothy grins transports you back to a chilly night in 2006…

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

“Mind if I bum a cigarette off you?” He asks as a boyish grin spreads across his face. His hair is dark and shaggy, covering one eye.

“Sure.” You say, passing one to him, lighting it.

“I’m Seunghyun by the way.” Smoke billows from his nostrils as he exhales.

“Y/N” you reply with a slight blush. He’s cute, in an emo kind of way, innocent. “Have you been a trainee long?”

“About 3 months. You?”

“Three years.” You exhale, defeated, leaning against the brick wall. “I fear I’m destined to stay one.”

“You never know, things could turn out differently.”

You shake your head. “Not when YG tells you it’s over.” You say before taking a long drag of your cigarette. “I’m too eccentric, leaving me to be, hmm let’s see how he put it…abrasive and unapproachable. I’ve been demoted to back up dancer for the next boy group out of pity…if I’m lucky.”

Seunghyun frowns. “I get it. I was denied at first. So I proved him wrong and he gave me a chance.” He says encouragingly.

“Good for you earning back his good graces. You must really want to be an idol.”

“A rapper. I want to be a rapper.”

You can see the determination in his eyes. “Hmmm, you have a cool rap name? Or is Seunghyun all you have to offer?” You tease.

He smirks. “Tempo. I went by Tempo for a while doing small stages here and there in the underground scene. I write my own lyrics and make my own beats…just gotta prove myself.”

“Well, I hope you get your wish, Tempo.” You smile, dropping your cigarette butt to the ground. “I’ll see you around.”

—————————

Six months later, you find yourself in the YG studio while your choreographer barks orders at you and your fellow dancemates .

“Alright, the debut performance is on the 19th. This performance will either make or break this group so everyone has to be at their best. We don’t need any of you fucking this up or YG will have my head. Y/N are you listening?” She asks, pointing at you directly.

You snap out of your daydream and face your choreographer. “Uh, yeah…big debut, got it.”

“BIGBANG has the potential to completely change things around here. There’s a possibility for permanent employment as part of their touring dance team if this works out. So do your best when the boys arrive.”

You roll your eyes. For the past 6 months you’ve been introduced to countless acts, each one reportedly more promising than the last only to have them fizzle out before making a debut. You had just turned 20 and were seriously considering waitressing the rest of your life if this group didn’t pan out. You just wanted to dance and get paid so you could work towards your goal of owning your own studio.

When the door opens, Hyun-Suk himself enters, giving a pitch about the importance of the debut and how BIGBANG would change the history of K Pop moving forward.

“Blah blah blah.” You say under your breath. “It’s not like we haven’t heard this twenty times over the last few months.”

“No, this one’s legit. Kwon Jiyong is a part of it. He’s been here for six years and is practically YG’s star child.” A fellow dancer shares.

Kwon Jiyong had welcomed you to YG when you initially became a trainee. He was talented but a little too cocky for your taste. You had a few interactions here and there but usually steered clear of one another. Truthfully, you didn’t run into many of the exclusive trainees anymore since being demoted. You were now lackluster and replaceable at any moment. If this partnership panned out, it could be beneficial for you.

Once the speech is over, BIGBANG enters. Four gangly boys under the age of 20 appear in front of you and your colleagues. They introduce themselves one by one. G-Dragon, Sol, D-Lite, and…Tempo? Seunghyun comes in last with his dimples on full display. He’s awkward, as always, but now there’s a confidence in him you hadn’t seen before. He actually made it…

“I’m TOP.” Seunghyun says, shyly.

You take note of the name change and blend in with everyone as you begin learning the choreography. TOP is by no means a strong dancer often standing still as if recalibrating in an attempt to join back in with the boys. You laugh to yourself thinking about him debuting. He's going to need all the help he can get in the dance department…

After what feels like hours of dancing to prove yourself, you line up in front of the mirrored wall waiting to be chosen…or declined. BIGBANG gathers in a corner deliberating. Girls are pointed at one by one and asked to leave. Then Jiyong asks you and four other girls to step forward.

This is it, I’m either in or out…you think as your heart begins thumping in your ears.

Jiyong asks your friend Sora to join him, long time dancer Ye-jin is instructed to join Youngbae, and a new girl named Yuna is placed with Daesung. You and Eun-Jin, an older dancer and fellow idol reject, remain.

Jiyong goes into a discussion about how you both show great potential but partnering with TOP will be a challenge as he doesn’t dance as well as his peers. You lock eyes with Seunghyun, recognition flashes across his face and he smiles at you. You feel a flutter in your chest.

“Eun-Jin, thank you for your time, you can go.”

You watch in disbelief as she leaves the room.

“Y/N you are clearly the best choice.” Jiyong says. “Seunghyun can’t dance to save his life. Your technique and energy will be more than enough to push him forward. Welcome to the team.”

You walk over, joining him. “Well, well, well…Tempo gets to be a rapper.” You say poking his chest, which is surprisingly toned.

“And you get to be part of a debut after all.” He grins.

—————————

You have your work cut out for you as you learn choreo and do your best to push Tempo in the right direction. He’s stiff and uncoordinated but with practice, lots of it, you’re able to hide the worst parts. It’s when you’re off stage that things really crumble.

One night, after a grueling rehearsal and a stern talk from Hyun-Suk, you find Seunghyun practicing well past midnight. His shirt wet with sweat, his cheeks pink from exertion.

“Tempo? What are you still doing here? We have a show tomorrow.” You say, startling him.

“I could ask you the same question.” He says breathlessly, grinning at the use of his old stage name. You still refused to refer to him as TOP. It had become almost a pet name between the two of you.

“If you really want to know, I was in the other studio dancing for my own enjoyment.” You smile, taking a seat on the floor, leaning against the mirrored wall. “I’m just a back up dancer. I can afford to look sleepy on stage…you’re the face card. They need you looking fresh.” You chuckle, making spirit fingers.

“I’m trying to get my shit together. My face alone won’t save me from Hyun-suk if I don’t start memorizing this choreography.” He sighs, taking a seat beside you.

“Hmmm, I don't know. I bet there will come a day where you can just stand onstage and that will be enough.” You smile, passing him your water bottle.

Seunghyun takes a long drink. “Not according to the boss.”

You bite your lip as he takes the hem of his shirt to wipe the sweat from his face. You note his incredibly toned stomach…Careful…

He leans his head back against the wall and looks at you. “This face will never be enough…” he frowns.

Without thinking, you reach your hand out, brushing his shaggy dark hair away from his face. “Oh, I don’t know. Your boyish features are fading into that of a male idol. You’ll be a sex symbol in no time.”

There’s a moment of quiet before Seunghyun grabs your wrist and pulls you into a kiss.

You freeze.

“Shit, I am sorry…I don’t know why I did that.” His words tumble from his mouth in a panic. “I should go, I don’t want to make this weird.”

You grab his shirt before he stands, pulling him back to the spot beside you. “Stop. Talking” You say as you straddle him, pulling him back into a kiss.

One of his hands makes its way to your waist while the other slides up the back of your neck.

You shift just right in his lap causing a quiet groan to escape his lips. You smile to yourself, as you deepen the kiss, taking control.

”Fuck, Y/N. You don’t know how bad I have wanted this.”

“Hmmm, I think I have a pretty good idea.” You grin, feeling him harden as you grind slowly in his lap.

Just as his hand begins to slide under your shirt, a door slams in the distance causing you both to scramble to your feet, walking in opposite directions of one another.

You run your hands through your hair. “Fuck, that was close.”

“It won’t happen again.” Seunghyun says quickly, adjusting his pants, clearly hiding his erection.

You look back at him, a sly smile spreading across your face. “Or we could be discrete.”

He raises a brow. “Hide it?”

”I don’t mind keeping a secret.” You say before placing a kiss on his cheek and heading out the door.

_______________________

A secret is exactly what your relationship became. The 2007 “Want You Tour” lasted only a few months through five cities in Korea but it was the perfect amount of time for Seunghyun to fall for you…and for you, much to your dismay, to fall for him as well.

It began as casual make-outs in the abandoned YG break room, accelerated into grinding on each other in one of the recording booths after hours, and then blossomed into you taking his virginity one night on the road in your hotel room.

He had been so quiet, so reserved, so…Seugnhuyn.

You recall the exceptionally heavy make out session on your bed. You reaching down to unbutton his pants and him immediately taking control, rolling you over onto your back, his arms bracketing your body.

”You’re sure?” He’d asked you, with so much consideration in his voice.

”Of course I’m sure.” You replied, rolling your eyes playfully. “I’ve been waiting for this…”

“I-I’ve never…”

You remember looking into his dark eyes, seeing both excitement and hesitancy all wrapped up into one.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” You smiled, shimmying off your own pants and underwear.

His hands had a slight tremble as he pulled the condom from his pocket and removed his own pants.

He was much bigger than you had initially anticipated and he caught the surprise that registered on your face.

”What?”

“Just…a lot to take in.”

At that moment, you both blushed.

When he entered you the feeling was overwhelming, your plan to keep your cool lost in a single thrust. Sure, he had been a virgin but Choi Seunghyun didn’t perform like one. That night, he got to know your body, your wants, your needs, and from that point forward, he never failed to deliver.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

You snap out of your daydream when you hear someone call your name. Looking up, you spot one of Seunghyun’s childhood friends.

”Hey.” You smile, embracing them in a hug.

“Didn’t think I’d see you here. It’s been years.” He says, glancing around the hallway. “It’s like a museum out here.”

“Makes it easy to relive the past.” You say as you gesture to the photos.

”Well, it's good to see you here supporting him. I’ll see you inside later?” He asks.

”Of course, I wouldn’t miss it.” You watch as he turns and walks away.

You continue looking at some of the older pictures featuring the early tours where your relationship with Seunghyun took root.

You laugh to yourself thinking about it. Once the initial jitters of the ‘first time’ was out of the way, sex became a game of “when and where can we make this happen?” The YG rehearsal room closet, the back seat of a car, a utility closet in Japan, and then countless hotel rooms in between, no place was off limits.

Times were simpler then…You say quietly to yourself, as you head down the hallway towards the main studio.

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