My life is full of tiny decisions. I guess everyone's life is full of tiny decisions, but I'm just so much more aware of that this week. Today is a freelance day for me -- a day that has structure, all of if my own. When I woke up, I made the decision to read two chapters of a novel I'm loving before getting out of bed. And then I made the decision to go to the gym, to listen to podcasts on my speaker while eating breakfast, to respond to an email, to send one unsolicited. In the time it took me to take a five minute shower, three more emails came in. I made the decision to read those before sitting down to write this for myself and, ultimately, all of you.Β
I won't take you through all the tiny decisions I've made about today because I know I'll bore you. But the point is this: when we're at our luckiest, we get to dictate how our lives go.
Last week was not one of those weeks. I didn't get to decide that my small family would get a major piece of bad news on my birthday. (Of all days.) I didn't get to decide that the brave brave Dr. Christine Blasey Ford's testimony would ultimately lead to zero minds changed, that Republicans would feel sorry for a rapist, that the news would affect me so deeply. But I did get to decide to go to a baseball game and eat fried clams that night. And on Saturday, I did get to decide to go to Discovery Park and spend a couple of hours in fresh air -- even though my partner was legitimately over the whole experience. I'm not blocking out the bad -- I can't decide to do that and I wouldn't want to even if I could -- but I am trying to find balance. And that feels like a good first step.Β
