#tilakvarma

Bigger

Morning sunlight spilled softly through the curtains.

Warm. Golden. Lazy enough to make everything feel slower than it actually was.

You woke up gradually to warmth pressed behind you.

For one sleepy second, your brain couldn’t process why your body felt so comfortable despite sleeping on a couch.

Then an arm tightened instinctively around your waist.

Oh.

Memory returned all at once.

The crying. The kisses. Tilak.

Your heartbeat softened immediately.

You were curled halfway against his chest now, his arm wrapped securely around your waist beneath the blanket while your legs tangled awkwardly with his.

And somehow—

this was still the safest you’d slept in months.

You tried shifting carefully without waking him.

Huge mistake.

Tilak made a sleepy sound of protest instantly before pulling you closer unconsciously.

“Where are you going…”

His voice came out rough with sleep.

Deep enough to make warmth rush embarrassingly fast through your stomach.

“I was trying not to wake you.”

“Failed.”

A small laugh escaped you.

Tilak blinked awake slowly after that, hair messy, eyes heavy with sleep before settling fully on your face.

The second he saw you looking at him—

his expression softened immediately.

“Better?”

The migraine.

Last night.

Everything.

You nodded slightly smiling slowly.

“A little.”

Tilak hummed quietly before his hand slid slowly along your waist beneath the oversized t-shirt absentmindedly.

Affectionate.

Instinctive.

Like touching you had already become natural for him.

Your breath caught anyway.

His sleepy eyes noticed instantly.

A tiny smile appeared on his face.

“There she is.”

You groaned softly, hiding your face briefly against his chest.

“You’re obsessed with that line.”

“Because you disappear too much.”

The words were teasing.

But there was honesty beneath them too.

Tilak’s fingers brushed slowly against your waist again before he leaned down slightly, pressing a soft kiss near your temple.

Then your cheek.

Then dangerously close to your mouth.

“Good morning to you too,” you murmured softly.

Tilak smiled faintly against your skin before finally kissing you properly.

Slow.

Warm.

Still sleepy enough that there was no restraint in it.

You melted instantly.

Morning kiss felt different somehow.

More intimate.

Less desperate.

Like this wasn’t just attraction anymore.

Your fingers slid into his hair automatically while Tilak pulled you on him, your knee tucked between both his legs, his hand spreading warm against your lower back beneath the shirt.

The kiss deepened lazily after that.

Lingering.

Unhurried.

And when you shifted slightly against him—

Tilak exhaled quietly into the kiss.

The sound sent warmth curling low in your stomach immediately.

His hand tightened slightly at your waist before sliding slowly along your back.

Still careful.

Still respectful.

But definitely affected.

You felt it instantly.

Especially when his lips moved briefly from yours to your jaw instead.

A soft breath escaped you.

Tilak paused immediately.

Then deliberately kissed your jaw again slower.

Your fingers tightened lightly in his hair.

“Tilak…”

Your voice came out breathless enough to make his eyes darken instantly.

The next kiss against your neck lingered.

Warm enough to make your pulse race immediately.

Your body shifted unconsciously closer against him and Tilak let out the quietest groan near your neck before burying his face there briefly.

The sound shot straight through you.

“Baby,” he muttered roughly.

God.

The couch suddenly felt too small.

Too warm.

Your heart raced harder when Tilak pulled back just enough to look at you properly again.

Hair messy. Eyes darker now. Arm still firm around your waist.

“You’re staring,” you whispered weakly smiling.

“You’re pretty in the morning.”

You rolled your eyes instantly.

“I cried for like two hours last night.”

“And?”

The sincerity on his face made your chest ache softly.

Tilak brushed hair away from your face carefully before kissing you once more.

Slower now.

Less sleepy. More aware.

Your body reacted immediately.

Especially when his fingers brushed softly against bare skin beneath the oversized shirt again.

Tilak noticed every reaction.

Of course he did.

His forehead rested briefly against yours afterward while both of you tried breathing normally again.

Then softly—

“Hungry?”

You laughed quietly.

The sudden normal question after that almost killed you.

“A little.”

“Good,” he murmured. “You’re eating properly today.”

Boyfriend mode.

Immediately back.

And somehow that felt even more intimate than the kissing.

───

An hour later the apartment smelled faintly like tea and toasted bread.

You sat on the kitchen counter in the same oversized shirt while Tilak moved around the kitchen making coffee like he belonged there.

Which honestly—

felt dangerous.

Domesticity looked ridiculously good on him.

Especially in grey sweatpants. The way his tshirt would lift everytime reached for something on the higher shelf...

Your eyes betrayed you once.

Tilak caught it immediately.

A smirk appeared instantly.

“Oh?”

“Don’t start.”

“You were staring. There”

“I wasn't staring there! And you’re literally standing there looking like that.”

Tilak laughed softly under his breath before walking closer.

His hand slid automatically to your thigh where you sat on the counter.

Natural.

Comfortable.

Like touching you had already settled into muscle memory.

“So,” he said casually. “You were saying something about work yesterday before we got distracted.”

Your cheeks warmed immediately at distracted.

But eventually you cleared your throat.

“I got promoted officially.”

Tilak froze.

Then his entire face lit up.

Actually lit up.

“I knew it.”

The pride in his voice hit harder than expected.

“You worked insane hours for this.”

You smiled shyly.

“It’s a big role.”

“It’s huge.”

Tilak moved closer until he stood between your knees near the counter.

“I’m ridiculously proud of you.”

God.

Why did he say things like that so sincerely?

“It comes with a raise too,” you admitted quietly.

Tilak grinned instantly.

“Oh, rich now?”

“Relax.”

“No no, this changes things. I need to behave differently around successful women.”

You laughed properly this time.

Tilak looked genuinely pleased hearing it.

Then casually:

“So what now?”

You shrugged lightly.

“I was thinking maybe a bigger apartment eventually.”

Tilak leaned against the counter listening quietly while you continued.

“This one’s nice but long term…” you gestured around. “It’s small. And my mom will come eventually, I’ll need more space anyway.”

“That makes sense.”

You nodded.

“I want sunlight too. And maybe a proper workspace. This apartment barely fits my work setup.”

Tilak hummed thoughtfully.

“Show me.”

“What?”

“Apartments.”

You blinked.

“Now?”

“Obviously now.”

“You have practice later.”

“I have time.”

You laughed softly before hopping off the counter to grab your laptop.

Twenty minutes later both of you sat side by side on the couch scrolling through absurdly expensive Mumbai apartments while Tilak acted like he was personally investing in them.

“This one’s ugly.”

“It’s minimalist.”

“It looks like a hospital.”

You snorted.

Tilak looked extremely proud of himself for making you laugh again.

“This one’s good,” he said suddenly.

You stared at the screen.

“It’s literally thirty minutes from my office.”

“Okay but look at the kitchen.”

“You don’t even cook.”

“I emotionally support cooking.”

“That’s not a thing.”

“It is now.”

The afternoon passed surprisingly easily after that.

Laptop balanced between both of you. Coffee mugs abandoned nearby. His arm occasionally settling around your shoulders absentmindedly while scrolling.

And somewhere during all that normalcy—

something warm settled quietly inside your chest.

Because this didn’t feel casual anymore.

It felt dangerously close to building something.

Eventually you leaned back against the couch cushions tiredly while Tilak kept scrolling through listings.

“So basically,” he summarized seriously, “you want sunlight, workspace, decent kitchen, safe area, and closer commute.”

“Yes.”

“And bigger wardrobe space.”

“That too.”

Tilak nodded thoughtfully like this was the most important discussion of his life.

Then after a few quiet seconds—

almost casually—

he murmured:

“There’s actually an empty apartment in my building.”

Your fingers stilled over the laptop instantly.

And the second the words left his mouth,

Tilak realized exactly how that sounded. 🌙

Stay

The migraine had started settling behind your eyes now.

Not gone.

Just quieter.

The apartment remained dim except for the warm lamp near the kitchen while the city lights glowed faintly through the curtains.

You stood near the hallway still wrapped in your oversized t-shirt and loose pajama pants while Tilak watched you carefully from the couch.

His eyes softened the second he noticed the tear tracks you hadn’t wiped properly.

“It’s late,” you said quietly. “You should sleep.”

Tilak didn’t answer immediately.

Just looked at you.

“You cried.”

You looked away.

“No.”

“Baby.”

The softness in his voice broke something fragile inside your chest instantly.

Because he wasn’t irritated. Wasn’t uncomfortable.

Just worried.

And suddenly—

you were exhausted.

So exhausted from carrying the same insecurities for years.

You laughed weakly under your breath before another tear slipped free.

“I’ve always been insecure, Tilak.”

His expression changed immediately.

You wrapped your arms tighter around yourself unconsciously.

“Since I was a teenager… my whole life became about losing weight somehow.” Your throat tightened painfully. “Every memory. Every event. Every picture.”

Tilak stayed completely silent.

Listening.

Actually listening.

“I thought if I became thinner enough maybe people would finally think I was pretty.” Your voice cracked softly. “Or enough.”

The hurt on his face deepened instantly.

“And even now…” You wiped your cheek quickly. “One stupid comment is enough to make me hate myself again.”

Tilak stood up slowly then.

Crossed the small distance between you carefully.

“You wanna know what I saw tonight?”

You shook your head immediately.

But he answered anyway.

“You.”

Your eyes burned again.

“You walked out in that dress and I genuinely forgot how to breathe for a second.”

A weak laugh escaped you despite yourself.

“I mean it,” he murmured softly. “I’ve never looked at you and thought anything except beautiful.”

Your chest hurt painfully.

Because he sounded so certain.

So sincere.

“And right now,” his eyes moved slowly over your loose clothes and messy hair, “you’re standing here like this and I still can’t stop staring.”

That finally broke your composure completely.

You cried properly for the first time in front of him.

Not quiet tears.

Actual crying.

Years of insecurity spilling out messily while your shoulders shook slightly.

Tilak pulled you into him instantly.

Warm arms. Steady hands. Safe.

And somehow—

that only made you cry harder.

His fingers moved slowly through your hair while the other hand stayed firm against your back.

“It’s okay,” he whispered softly near your temple.

You shook your head against his chest.

“I hate feeling like this.”

“I know, baby.”

The pet name shattered you again.

Tilak just held you through it patiently.

No rushing. No fixing.

Just there.

Eventually your breathing slowed enough for him to guide you gently toward the couch.

You sat beside him curled slightly inward while he brushed damp hair away from your face carefully.

“There she is,” he murmured softly when you finally looked at him properly again.

Your chest tightened.

Tilak’s fingers slid slowly over your thigh comfortingly through the soft fabric of your pajama pants while silence settled warmly around both of you.

And somewhere during that quiet—

the air changed again.

Not suddenly.

Slowly.

Your eyes lifted toward him at the exact same moment his gaze dropped briefly to your lips.

The intimacy felt heavier now. Warmer. More dangerous somehow.

Tilak’s hand moved gently to your jaw.

His thumb brushing softly against your cheek.

Then he leaned in.

The kiss started slow.

Careful.

Like reassurance first.

His lips moved softly against yours while one hand stayed resting against your thigh and the other cupped your face gently.

You melted into it immediately.

Because kissing him felt safe now.

Comforting.

But when your fingers slid into his hair softly, Tilak exhaled quietly against your mouth.

And the sound changed everything.

The kiss deepened naturally after that.

Warmer. Longer. Needier.

You shifted closer unconsciously until your thigh pressed against his.

Tilak’s hand tightened slightly there immediately.

A shaky breath left him.

God.

The effect you had on him still shocked you every time.

Your lips parted softly against his and Tilak kissed you deeper now, slower but more affected.

His hand slid carefully from your thigh to your waist beneath the oversized shirt, fingers spreading warm against bare skin.

The touch made your breath catch instantly.

And when you moved closer again unconsciously your body brushed properly against his lap this time.

Tilak actually let out the quietest sound against your mouth.

Low. Rough. Uncontrolled.

Your entire body reacted immediately.

The sound alone made heat rush through you embarrassingly fast.

“Tilak…”

Your voice came out breathless.

His forehead dropped briefly against yours while he exhaled shakily.

“You’re killing me.”

The roughness in his voice sent another wave of warmth through you.

And maybe because emotions were still too raw, or because you needed comfort, or because he kept looking at you like you were precious, you kissed him again first.

Harder this time.

Tilak reacted instantly.

One hand slid firmly to your waist before he gently pulled you fully onto his lap without breaking the kiss.

A soft gasp escaped you at the sudden movement.

Your legs settled instinctively on either side of him while his hands steadied automatically against your hips.

And God—

the position felt intimate immediately.

Too intimate.

Especially when your body shifted unconsciously trying to settle comfortably against him.

The friction made both of you freeze.

A low sound escaped Tilak’s throat instantly.

Your own breath caught sharply right after. You could now actually feel how much you affected him.

Heat rushed violently through your entire body.

Neither of you moved for one dangerous second.

Then accidentally, you shifted again.

This time Tilak actually groaned softly against your lips before his head tilted back briefly against the couch.

The sound nearly destroyed your remaining thoughts entirely.

“Baby…” he muttered roughly.

Your cheeks burned instantly but your body reacted embarrassingly fast too, breath turning uneven while your fingers tightened in his hair.

Tilak’s hands flexed at your waist carefully.

Still respectful.

Still controlled.

But very affected.

The next kiss felt messier.

Needier.

Like both of you were losing composure slowly now.

His lips moved from yours briefly to your jaw, then lower toward your neck where he kissed softly beneath your ear.

Your head tipped back automatically.

A quiet moan escaped you before you could stop it.

Tilak froze for half a second at the sound.

Then exhaled shakily against your skin like he physically felt it.

“God…”

His lips pressed slower along your neck now, warm enough to make your pulse race wildly while his hands moved carefully against your bare back beneath the oversized shirt.

Not inappropriate.

Just enough touch to make everything hotter.

Your fingers curled against his shoulders while your body pressed unconsciously closer into him again.

Tilak’s breathing turned rough instantly.

Another soft sound left him near your neck before his hands slid slowly upward along your back.

Warm palms against skin.

Comforting and dangerous at the same time.

Then his fingers rested accidentally against the clasp of your bra.

The awareness of it hit both of you immediately.

You went still.

Tilak pulled back slightly at once, eyes lifting toward yours instantly.

Concern replacing heat immediately.

But instead of speaking—

you suddenly buried your face against his shoulder shyly, arms wrapping around him tightly.

Tilak melted immediately.

A soft laugh escaped him under his breath before his arms wrapped fully around you again.

Warm. Protective. Careful now.

One hand moving slowly through your hair while the other rested safely against your back.

And for several quiet moments, he just held you there in his lap while your heartbeat slowly calmed against his chest.