maybe this is just me But hear me out. since i was a very young kid, i’ve had this weird inexplicable love for tickling that i knew was unusual and that i actively felt ashamed of. i didn’t know why it felt so shameful, but it just struck me as something that i could never tell anyone about.
before i went to bed on school nights, i would make sure to clear my search history of anything related to tickling. i would have been utterly mortified if anyone had ever seen those searches. i would literally pride myself on how long i’d lasted without indulging in tickle content, and i’d feel like i’d basically relapsed whenever i “gave in.”
when i reflect on these moments, i see them as the times where i have felt the most profoundly alone that i’d ever been. i felt so scared of this part of my life, but i was also so enthralled with the topic — i loved tickling. it was something so personal and frighteningly vulnerable to me. i didn’t even know why i loved it so much — everyone around me actually seemed to hate it! it was just so beyond special to me. something about the uncontrollable laughter and smiling really had me in a headlock! i’ve just always been so in love with tickling and i will continue to be in love with tickling forever ☺️
