He'd thought about this a long fucking time. Too long, really. So long that it took him an obnoxious amount of fucking time to come up with a plan, and to figure out how to do it. What to do it with. It's wrapped up in a jar of fucks. Literally. A Jar of fucking Fucks, every one Lola's to give freely — except one very shiny, very special boobie shaped fuck.
Fuck knows how long it's going to take for her to get to that fuck, though. Lev can only hope she isn't stingy with the giving of mediocre wooden fucks.
The gift is crudely wrapped in pink tissue paper. He did his best, but he's only a fucking man. At least he makes it floofy on top and gives it a shiny stick-on bow. Sticks some joints in the floof, too. That's cute, right?
Happy fucking Birthday, Worm. You deserve all the fucks in the world. I fucking love you.
