Watching Supernatural as a bisexual is such a specific type of grief like the Potential is incredible and is literally on such a large scale (a faithless human man changing an immortal unchanging soldier of god who in turn uses his love for this man to create the first true act of free will) but the romantic narrative is entirely in subtext like a story gnawing at the bars of its cage.
They make jokes on the show about dean or castiel being gay as a means to push you away from destiel as a serious conclusion but it only solidifies the possibility in peoples minds.
Then of course they played into destiel for views but once queer fans started asking for follow through and actual representation they distanced the characters as to punish the same fans who helped keep their show runnning for so long.
Their relationship plays as a physical representation of queer silence and limitation. The story practically begs them to elaborate on their feelings but despite that they rarely discuss them, and never about romance. Limiting their relationship to the central theme of 'family' when it has clearly always been more.
Scenes upon scenes of content that, if it had been between a man and a woman would be completely romantic. Touches, glances, desperation and longing that between a heterosexual couple would be the slowburn of a lifetime are excused as part of Dean and Cas's 'profound bond', but never elaborated on.
The homophobia and biphobia that influenced the Supernatural writers robbed the story of what it could have been, satisfying & inspirational.
How monumental it could have been for both characters it finally admit and speak their truth. How impactful it would have been if Dean Winchester; hyper masculine gun toting american dream, Dean Winchester, came out as bisexual and declared his love for Castiel on screen. How that would add to the multi layered representation of queer people in the media.
They wouldn't even have to kiss, because I truly feel their relationship is one that would take longer to build to physical touch as Dean is soooo repressed and his journey is not one that could be sped up. As well as privacy being a fundamental to them breaking away from Chuck's story.
Many people have made posts and videos about how Dean and Castiel complete each others story arcs and I agree. For Dean, Romantic love with the person who taught you that you are worthy of love and more than what you can give to others. For Castiel, romantic love with the person who taught him how to be human, who's love pushed him to create the first true act of free will. Their story is beautiful but ultimately, incomplete.
I'm sure I'm not the only person who watches supernatural and feels...hollow. Another reminder that when you are queer sometimes the things you love do not love you back, and sometimes will even punish you. That even in a show where people die so often it's a running gag, that as a queer person we are still utterly disposable.
