#thereisnothingtofear

The two little boys walking in front of me kept arguing back and forth, their book bags bouncing from side to side.  They were starting to piss me off.   “It’s an urban legend!  It never happened.  They’re stories passed down through time which people keep adding on to make it scarier as well as relevant you dumb asses!”  I shouted at them.  They jumped up, startled by my anger, turned to look at me, and ran away.  Scared.  I saw it in their eyes.  And by now I was an expert on it.  An expert on fear. See I have a very unique job.  It’s not really a job as more of a way to score serious money.  It involves fear.  I create it.  I manipulate and mold it.  I am a grave robber.  I’m part of a team known to many as “Devil’s Heart”.  We have spent the last 5 years going from state to state robbing the dead of all their wealth, right down to their rotting bones.  We are wanted in all the states we hit, though no one has pictures or evidence of us.  We have a system and it’s fail proof.   First of all, I never wanted to do this.  I’m a technology nerd who was planning on studying computer science when I went on to college.  But that’s not how it went down.  It was Alice’s idea.  A few years ago we were at the funeral home that was near the cemetery.  Every one was saying their last goodbyes to the caretaker of it who died of heart failure.  When the three of us got close to the coffin and saw the old fart, he was dripping in gold like a fucking king.  He was dressed to the nines in a nice suit (probably designer.  The rich folks kind.).  And, most importantly, loaded in gold.  He had a watch, a chain, rings, and bracelets, cuff links and a flask that were all gold.  Our eyes lit up like when a fat kid sees cake.  Alice shot a wicked smile at Randy, which he returned with a devilish look.  He wiggled his brows like he always does when he’s looking for trouble.   Randy is my older brother.  He’s a man that’s got a seat in hell with his name on it.  He’s a liar, a robber and a cheater.  He had sex with the hot girls in our hometown, and managed to do their sisters and friends and cousins all without getting caught by a single one.  He’s a pro at this.  He looks like a Greek god.  Dark brown wavy hair, muscular like a statue in a museum, a nice tan from walking down the streets shirtless, and smoldering brown eyes that can charm the pants off anyone.  I look nothing like him.  I’m a scrawny and lanky white guy with light brown shoulder length hair, skinny as a twig, whiter than snow with big bushy brows (Randy has super model eyebrows.  They’re perfect.)  I have brown worried eyes that make people think I do drugs or have a mental problem.  And I am a virgin and always will be.  There’s no girl who wants to go down on me.  Hell, they don’t even talk to me.  It’s Randy who they want to suck and score with.   Anyways, back to the funeral home.  After the wake finished, everyone left in his or her car to the cemetery where gramps was going to be laid down permanently.  Everyone except us.  We stood outside and went into an alley hidden from the city sights and sounds.  “Did you see that shit?  He was fucking loaded in gold!  Had to be a good mil in there!”  Alice isn’t exactly a lady, so what comes out of her mouth is just like how she is.  “Yeah, really fucking loaded.  I didn’t know people put out money like that on the dead!  That’s some shit right there.  Real gold!  Just wide open like that!”  Randy had recently done his coke and pills mash up, which explained his overly hyper attitude and constant twitching.  “Of course they do.  Randy, we’ve been to several funerals before.  People get buried with keepsakes.  You know, what they want to be buried with.  Stuff that’s special to them.”  I replied in a singsong voice.  “Spoken like the loser you are Andy.”  Alice said with venom in her tongue. Alice never liked me.  She thought I was weak and pathetic.  She has a habit of constantly comparing me to Randy.  Alice is the leader of our group.  She has type A personality, not to mention she’s a total bitch.  Everyone loves her though, so they see passed that.  See, Alice is a celebrity in our hometown (and pretty much anywhere she goes.).  She is a stripper at the local strip joint who knows EVERY drug dealer, sex offender, junkie, alcoholic and prisoner known to mankind.  When she’s not doing her part time dancing on poles gig, she’s a trick waiting on the street corners for easy cash from guys who are that desperate that they’d have sex with a prostitute just to say they’re no longer virgins.  “Malice Alice” is her nickname.  She has ties to the underworld.  Which is why she can afford the small studio she lives in now.  Alice is a pill popper.  Every week, she throws a “pharm party” at her place where people pay to get high off prescription pills and other meds.  Those meds are scored from Alice’s connections of junkies and prisoners.  They hook her up and in return she sends a prostitute (sometimes herself) to screw their brains out.  She is trailer trash and white trash just like Randy and I.   That’s exactly how Randy met her.  At the street corner wearing a big fur coat, skinny jeans and her bra showing with stripper heels (clear and see through).  She charged him $100 cause he let her dope with him after sex.  Normally, she charges more because she’s “famous” and a “celebrity”.  They’re in an “open” relationship because of what she does, so they’re both allowed to see other people (which includes having sex) so long as they don’t fall in love with them.  That’s right.  My brother Randy has a boner for Alice and claims that he’s “in love” with her.  In fairness, Alice isn’t physically ugly.  She’s tall and lean like a model with a razor bob haircut that frames her long face.  Crystal blue eyes, jet-black hair and legs that go on forever with porcelain skin.  That’s her look.  She has a tramp stamp of the devil and the evil eye tattooed on her upper back.   So now that you know the players, here is the game.  That night after the funeral we went home and started planning.  We were going to rob the old fart of his jewels, but the question was how.  How do we steal from a dead body?  How do we break into a cemetery without people noticing? What do we do?  We plotted and plotted and plotted.  Hours went by pacing back and forth trying to brainstorm some master plan.  Finally, we gave in to sleep and passed out on the suede coach.  The next day, I got to school late because I woke up late.  I mean like 5 hours late.  I made it in time for my computer class.  As class was finishing, I got a text from Randy.  It said: “GET YOUR ASS OUT OF SCHOOL AND MEET ME AND ALICE BY THE CEMETERY!”  I gulped.  My stomach all of a sudden knotted and I felt like vomiting.  I thought that last night was it for that.  We had all decided to drop it because there was no way we could get away with it.  We’d be spending a long time in the slammer if we got caught.  So I texted him back: “NO.”   A few seconds later my phone vibrated again and it read: “COME DOWN HERE… OR I’LL GO DOWN THERE AND BEAT YOUR FUCKING FACE IN UNTIL ITS NOTHING BUT MUSH!”  The more Randy did dope, the angrier he got.  So I knew he was messed up as he was texting me now.  I responded with: “WE AGREED NOT TO GO THROUGH WITH IT.  WE DON’T HAVE A PLAN.  AND I’M NOT GOING TO JAIL!” “WRONG!  WE DO HAVE A PLAN.  THE PLAN IS YOU!  GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE AND BRING YOUR NERD SHIT WITH YOU.  IF NOT, I’LL CALL THE COPS AND TELL THEM YOU’RE A DRUG DEALER.  ALL MY SHIT IS HIDDEN IN YOUR ROOM, WITH YOUR FINGERPRINTS ON IT!  ALICE WILL BACK ME UP AND YOU’LL REALLY BE IN THE HELL HOLE.  NOW GET THE FUCK OVER HERE ALREADY!”   I should have said no to that.  But at the end of the day, Randy is my brother and I truly care about him.  I love him even with his drug addictions and screwing whores (Alice).  So against my will (and a dangerous threat), I skipped my other classes and took the bus to Grimoire Street.  It’s literally a ghost town since most of the buildings are abandoned and falling apart with age.  The Reaper Cemetery was across the street from the bus stop.  Once I got off, I crossed it and as I neared the entrance, I saw two zombies.  No, actually it was Alice and Randy wearing scary costumes and really disgusting zombie makeup.  As I got closer to them, a sudden fog appeared out of nowhere and covered everything.  Randy’s red Chevy pick up truck vanished like that, along with the buildings, the street and everything.  The giant cemetery was now a shrouded in a scary mist.  I looked around and saw nothing.  There was a dead silence and my heart started picking up pace.  I got freaked out I forgot I had actually ENTERED the cemetery, so I bumped into something hard and rocky and screamed.  I turned around and it was a tombstone.  I felt it.  And just as I was about to run away something flew above me and threw a fireball my way.  It landed in front of me and the light from it blinded me.  I closed my eyes and heard noises coming near me.  “Please!  No, you don’t have to do this!  I’ll give you anything!  Just don’t kill me!   I don’t want to die!”  I was begging for my life.  Then, out of nowhere, someone wrapped me in a bear hug and lifted me off the ground.  I felt another pair of hands on my feet tugging me.   I was thrashing my body around before the thugs threw me hard on the ground.  When I did land on the hard asphalt, I heard laughter.  In fact, I heard very familiar laughter.  I opened my eyes and the fog had vanished.  Above me, Alice and Randy were laughing like hyenas.  I looked behind them and saw a witch costume hanging from the ladder of a firefighter engine.  I saw a big fog machine hiding behind a large oak tree in the cemetery.  “What the hell is wrong with you?! I almost had a heart attack!” “Exactly.  That was the point.  That’s how we’re going to do it!” Randy sounded excited.  His eyes were normal, so the dope must have worn off.   “In order to rob the dead, we have to blend with them.” Alice ripped away the prosthetic gashes on her face and removed the powdered wig she had on.   “So then… Why do you need me?” I was curious since apparently, they had it figured out. “You are going to create scary sounds for us.  And we’re going to need a projector to put on the fire ladder.  That way you can play scary shit on your computer and it’ll be projected life size,” Randy explained.   “We have to scare people shit less so they won’t catch us when we’re digging up the graves.  After that, we mop the corpses for what they’re worth and get the fuck out before the sun comes up.”  Alice seemed determined.  She really wanted to go through with this.  She had debt to pay.  So did Randy and I.  Randy was for drugs.  I was only in it because I had beat a kid in school with a computer to the point of death.  Since my fingerprints were on the bastard, I bribed the cops questioning me with money as well as some dope from Randy.  But the cops were getting greedy now and wanted more.  The stuff I was giving them wasn’t enough.  So I had to come up with a large sum of what I owed them before they put me in the slammer for it.   “People are afraid of anything.  Their own shadows.  Their own thoughts.  So this is just icing on the cake.  We’ll come at the dead of night, scare off any dumb bitch that’s here late, mop our shit, and leave quickly.  We’ll hide the equipment in the abandoned houses.  I’ll bring my truck.  You and Alice will take the bus down here and we’ll rendezvous around the back of the cemetery.”  Randy was a man with a plan.   “I’ll drug the caretaker with sleeping pills.  He’s old anyways, so one will probably take him out for the whole night.  We’ll be clear then to mop out the dead!” Alice was so proud of herself.  She loves her some mopping (it’s a slang term for stealing.  It’s used a lot by criminals as code so they don’t get caught.)   That was how our system was created.  Over the years, we’ve altered it slightly. Instead of all of us coming out at the same time once the fog sets, we take turns “raiding” the joint.  That means we each go out one at a time, taking a different area of the cemetery, and scare the shit out of anybody there.  Since the cemetery is lined up in rows, it’s easy to just go up and down them.  We have night vision goggles now to help see through the fog and, obviously, the dark.  We also have pyrotechnics we roll up in balls and throw from the top of trees.  And like Randy said, I hooked up my tech equipment to the stolen fire engine and installed a projector at the end of the ladder.  We raise it and project images of the dead bodies we see when we dig up and break the coffins so we can mop.  It’s been five years now since we started and we have been scoring well so far.   Tonight we happen to be in Charlotte, North Carolina.  This particular cemetery is rumored to be haunted.  Since there is a lot of history in this city, folks are very superstitious and believe in the ghost stories told.  You can’t blame them; I mean take a look at New Orleans.  Every house down there is haunted.  And there was a lot of shit that was done in the past.  When you think about slavery, the Salem witch trials, Jack the Ripper (in London), and so on and so forth, ghost stories ARE scary.  Do you want the ghost of Jack the Ripper or any serial killer in your house knowing you can’t see them?  And what do you do if they try something, like say, kill you?  You can’t do anything because you can’t see them!  What you don’t know is scarier than what you do know.  That’s how the old saying goes.  And this city is home to some scary ass ghost stories if I’ve ever heard them.   We are about to scope out the site and make sure everything is set.  In every state, we pick up new gear since we dispose of all the evidence of the previous one.  So we have a new fire engine (and by new I mean stolen), new goggles, new gloves, new walkie-talkies, etc.  I managed to hack into the city’s blueprints archives online and print out the whole blueprint for the cemetery.  We head out in the morning, pretending we’re tourists (our usual gig) and get off the bus right before it passes by the cemetery.  Alice has the blueprint in her big purse, and we have markers to mark all the graves we want to hit.  We avoid poor people cause; obviously, they don’t got a dime to their names.  We only mop the rich ones.  Usually, it’s a quarter or less of the whole cemetery.  Unless we’re in a rich neighborhood, then the number of graves to mop goes up.   “Are you all good?” Alice asks in a whisper. “Yeah.  I’m good.  I got lit last night so I’m set.”  Randy looked clean today.  He doped up yesterday so he really IS good today.  “What about you little bro?” “I’m fine.  Don’t call me that.  Only Mandy calls me that.”  Amanda is our sister.  We call her Mandy.  So yeah, we’re Mandy, Randy and Andy.  Go figure.  She is the only normal one.  Except that she stupidly married some guy with 15 wives in Utah.  So now she’s a sister wife sharing her husband with 14 other dumb ass women.  And to top it, she’s had 2 kids with him.  She met him online and 3 months later, she’s a sister wife.  I know, kind of sad considering she was going for a PhD.  But I guess he makes her happy.  She only visits us on rare occasions since being a sister wife means you automatically move in with your man.  I haven’t seen her since last year on Christmas.  She was with us for 2 days only and went back to sister wife duties (basically being a maid, cooking, cleaning, etc.).   This cemetery was huge.  The blueprint didn’t do it justice.  It must have been at least half the size of Central Park in New York.  There were lines of huge trees that divided the graves into segments.  I saw a big patch of the yard with red, white and blue, meaning the dead soldiers and other military folks were there.  We saw lots of giant tombstones with granite and psalms and prayers carved into them.  There were cherubs and angel statues all over the place, too. They really are superstitious down here.  There were barely any people visiting the dead today, so we got down to work.  I took out my tablet and brought up the list of the people buried here.  Alice and Randy marked the graves by placing black roses on them.  That was our way of knowing.  We spray painted roses we bought and glitter bombed them.  They would sparkle under the moonlight for us later, like a lighthouse beam navigating lost ships.  We took our time because the yard was so damn huge!  It took us a good four hours to finish up.  But we had to be thorough.  Nothing could go wrong with a gig this big. By the time we finished, it was getting dark.  The sun vanished behind dark clouds.  And nighttime dropped like a blanket being thrown over someone’s head.  As I followed Randy towards where the entrance was, I felt something behind me.  I turned quickly but saw nothing.  Then I felt it again.  I turned once more.  But this time I saw something.  Actually, someone.  Way off in the distance behind me, by an old cross tombstone, I saw what appeared to be a woman.  She was dressed in all black with a long black veil coming down to the ground.  I couldn’t see her face or any part of her cause she was dressed so that no skin was showing.  “Hey, Randy, look!  There’s some chick back there staring at us.”   Randy stopped and turned to look.  He looked in the direction I was staring at.  He had a strange look on his face.  “What chick?”  He asked with a confused look. “The lady over there!  She’s wearing one of those old dresses.  Like from the 1800’s or something.  Don’t tell me you don’t see her!  She’s wearing a long fucking veil!  It’s literally dragging on the floor!”   “Andy, you’re not a comedian.  You never are or will be.  Whatever joke you’re pulling, it’s not working.  There’s NO one there.” “What are you guys doing?  Let’s go home already.  Tomorrow’s the big day.  After this gig, we’ll have more than enough to leave the country.  Then all our troubles will be gone.”  Alice decided she wanted to be greedy and keep her money.  So instead of paying her debt, she was going to change her identity and flee the country.  She got a fake ID from one of her “customers” that she met on the street corner back home.  Randy of course agreed to this idea, so of course I had to go along too.  I loved Randy.  I wanted to be just like him, and since I couldn’t, being with him was the second best option.  Randy was my world and I loved being in it.  He made me feel special and wanted.  Like I was useful in life.  So of course I would go for him.  I would do anything for him.   “Let’s go already.  Andy, you sure you’re not high?  Cause I don’t see a damn thing either.  You’re seeing stuff.  The night’s just messing with you.”   My mouth opened to protest but I decided to drop it.  As we crossed the street to wait for the bus again, I turned one last time.  And sure enough, there she was.  Right behind the now closed gates.  This time, I heard her.  She was saying something.  Actually, it sounded more like singing. “Three dumb kids.  Stupid in the head.  No respect while living.  And none for the dead.”   She sang it over and over again.  And as she did, she moved her hand towards her neck and with her finger, quickly drew an imaginary line from one end to the other.  I got the message and gulped.  Just then the bus came and we hopped on quickly so we could get some rest before the big day tomorrow.  I looked out the window and just as the bus was pulling away, she looked in my direction and waved.  That’s when I passed out. I awoke the following day and the alarm clock at the hotel read 3:35 PM.  I went to the bathroom, showered and brushed my teeth.  When I got out, Randy was naked and slipping on his boxers in the bedroom.  “Hey, sleeping beauty! You got good sleep last night?” “Not if you were here with me,” I replied sarcastically.   “Aw, come on!  You know you love it when I sleep over.  It’s good times.” “Yeah, sure it is.” I can’t help but give him a warm smile and we both start giggling like schoolgirls.  I hand him his shirt and we both finish getting dressed just as Alice walked in. “You ladies ready?”  She asks with amusement in her voice. “Fuck yeah!” Randy is clean today.  He always dopes the day before we mop.  But his enthusiasm is still the same as when he gets good.   “Yeah, let’s do it.”  I say half convinced.  I had a bad feeling about today.  After yesterday night, I really didn’t want to go to this particular cemetery.   We got there the usual time and prepped pretty quickly.  The caretaker was out thanks to Alice’s sleeping pills.  As I started the fog machine, we slipped on our masks and laughed cruelly as the fog made a blanket and covered the whole yard.  We laughed like we were serial killers, evil and psychotically.  When the fog machine finished doing its thing, we began the raid.  Alice went first.  She crouched down like a lion about to attack and made her rounds.  Then it was Randy’s turn.  He took the east and north parts of the cemetery to scare.  Lastly, it was my turn.  When I was done, we turned on the projector and started with the pyros in case we missed anyone.  Once done, we got the shovels out and headed to where the graves were “marked”.   Finally, we got to the final grave.  And I instantly recognized it.  It was the one where I had seen the lady last night.  I turned and saw the giant tree right next me, just a few feet away from the grave.  And as we started digging, I saw her.  This time she was at the opposite end of the row we were digging on.  Then I started hearing her singing once again. “Three dumb kids.  Stupid in the head.  No respect while living.  And none for the dead.”   Her voice kept on getting louder and louder.  And she once again gestured as if to say “off with your head” with her finger.  I start to panic.  I continue digging until we get to the coffin.  We break it open and I almost shit myself.  It’s her.  The same black dress, same veil, same gloves, same everything.  I look up again to where she was, but she’s gone.  Randy and Alice savagely rip off her necklace and take the rings off from her gloves.  Once we are done, we start to pack up.  And just as I’m headed with the stolen goods in my duffel bag, she’s there.  I drop the bag and start running back, but Randy and Alice are gone.  I’m now fully panicking cause the blueprint was with Alice in her bag.  Terror hits me as I realize that I am completely lost in this maze of a cemetery.  I keep running and looking back but she’s nowhere to be seen.  However, the singing is growing louder and louder. “Three dumb kids.  Stupid in the head.  No respect while living.  And none for the dead.”   This time, the voice is coming from all around me!  I can hear it everywhere!  It’s like she is right NEXT to me.   As I am getting closer to the end of whatever part of the cemetery I’m in, I spot them.  Alice and Randy are outside his red Chevy putting away the remainder of the stolen goods.  He’s smoking a cigarette and she’s putting something in her mouth.  My guess is pills.  I’m waving my arms at them and am about to scream for them when I trip and fall into a tombstone.   “HERE LIES ELIZABETH MARIE STARK.  HANGED FOR PRACTICING WITCHCRAFT AND KILLING HUNDREDS OF CHILDREN BY CUTTING OFF THEIR HEADS.  SHE CLAIMED HER INNONCE ON THE NIGHT OF HER EXECUTION IN SALEM.  MAY HER SOUL BE AT PEACE.” I hold on to the cross tombstone and start to raise myself slowly.  My hands are red with blood.  I must have hit my head on the damn thing.  I feel liquid running down my face and as I touch it, I feel the blood coming out of me.  As I try to stand on my legs, my right foot wobbles.  I apparently sprained my ankle when I fell.  I put my hand to steady myself on the cross and place my bloody hands around my mouth.   “Three dumb kids.  Stupid in the head.  No respect while living.  And none for the dead.”   There it is again.  And this time it sounds REALLY close by.  I gather whatever strength I have for a scream but feel something grabbing my foot.  I look down in horror to see a black glove grabbing me from the dirt.  I try to kick it but then another hand pops up and grabs my sprained ankle.  Now I can’t move.  As I struggle with the gloved hands pulling me I turn to look straight ahead.  And gasp in horror.  She’s right in front of me.  The long black veil is just an inch from my face.   “Three dumb kids.  Stupid in the head.  No respect while living.  And none for the dead.”   As she sings this, she wraps her hands around my throat.  I lose my grip on the tombstone and watch in horror as I see Randy and Alice one last time.  The red Chevy is driving off into the night.  Then as my body is being pulled down into the ground, I feel the hands on my throat tighten, and body stops thrashing around.   My eyes roll up, blurrily, as everything starts fading to black….