#theemdiary

As sit here in my cozy bed with my bedroom blinds open for my eyes to see the lovely decking capture the morning sunlight. I’m grateful for everything I have. My family, my health and my opportunities. Many aren’t as lucky as I am. 

It’s currently 9:51am, I went to bed at 1am watching tiktoks (silly me). Need to focus on my sleep more, what's new. At least I got a sleep in today. Going for a walk with Mum today then just chilling. Sunday’s have to be one of my favourite days, you don’t need an excuse to be lazy, that’s what Sunday include and what they are for. 

Real housewives of Beverly Hills have a new season, watched the first two eps. YAY I LOOOVE IT. missed them haha. 

Have good day. 

Hard day at work today, busy and felt tired the whole day, My watch told me I only slept 4 hours. mhmm? 

Drove all the way to footy training but didn't train as I got their too late. I stayed for dinner but still felt yuck, got my period soo.../ I don't think I’ll stay for the dinner or at least pay for dinner. It’s a lot considering I up at 6ish and rushing to get there to then come home late. 

Feel like a blob today, ate a lot of chocolate and bought a hungry jacks storm ice cream on the way home cause I felt depresso. Start again tomorrow. Friday YAY. Playing netball at night. I aim to eat healthy, start using the calorie tracking again but put it on private so no-one sees. I was doing a training program but quit it yesterday after doing it since late Feb. Doing sports, the program and work was too much. I’ve felt overwhelmed this week. 

Right enough boring chat and off to bed. Bean bag chair has been moved from the nook for some reason...think mum moved it..mhmm naughty haha. Oh well another perspective today. Looking onto the lit hallway and the Beatles poster of Abbey road I have framed above my bed. Just like the Beatles I have to keep moving in the same directions, stay focused and keep looking ahead at a good pace, Ill get there. Ill loose weight. Ill get my sleep routine in track and I will also begin to be really good with my money. 

Goooood night, im about to snuggle up in my toastier bed and forget about the worlds pressures and cruel ways. Im lucky to be able to do so.

Today Im not feeling so great. I haven’t been sleeping well. I find myself obsessing over how I am perceived on social media and it’s gotten to the point of endless scroll and checks of my profiles are occurring and consuming my days. My shoulders are sore from the tension and worry I am carrying. I haven't wrote about my life in the blog for a while now. It gets to Feb/March and I lose track of things due to being so busy. Lately I’ve been on Footy camp, family weekends away, Hen party and a wedding. One to come in two weeks time. 

A weights program I have been following as well as training for footy and netball. Im keeping myself busy but also wasting the free time I have on social media. So many times I tell myself to be more creative. This creativity needs to be invested in my own time outside of social media. I don’t need anyone approval other than my own. 

My focus is to loose weight and also be more clean this month. Keeping my space, my room clean and tidy to have a clearer mind. I choose to focus on my sleep also. 

Time to write more too! I’d love to try a podcast... or creating art through photography, drawing or music. Im excited for a change, time to change all these bad habits. 

Today I was in the office by myself, I am tomorrow. I'm enjoying it, its a good chance to gain confidence.

After work I went to Netty training. Was so good to catch up with the girls. Then I went to the gym and did my program. My diet was good today, I just need to stay off the chocolate at work haha whoops.

Feeling like myself today, I'm feeling the benefits of this gym program. I can't wait to tonne up, lean up and loose weight.

Up to season 7 RuPaul Drag Race. love love, love it!!

Tomorrow I aim to go the gym before work. Waking up at 5:45am.