#testing logs

echo@pandora /var/log/tests # ls | grep "^gamma-03\d\.log$"

gamma-030.log gamma-031.log gamma-032.log gamma-033.log gamma-034.log gamma-035.log

echo@pandora /var/log/tests # cat gamma-035.log

Subjects include 2 groups of 2: Group A being two female subjects in their mid-twenties, Group B being two male subjects in their mid-twenties. All groups include subjects with very different backgrounds, religious beliefs, and interests

For the first half of the experiment, 4 separate testing areas were provided for each individual subject. The testing areas have been fitted with computers already opened to Youtube, specifically a page streaming a 3 minute video entitled [DATA EXPUNGED] which has since gone viral due to its controversial nature. Subjects are instructed to watch the video in its entirety then leave a comment expressing their opinion on the provided content. 12 minutes into testing, all subjects had watched the clip and commented as instructed. As expected, both groups represented completely parallel views on the video, with one subject supporting the content enthusiastically and the other disgusted and strongly opposed to the clip’s message.

Subjects were then instructed to freely debate the content of the video with the corresponding member of their group, again using the comment section of the webpage. Both groups immediately seemed highly irritated by the other’s differing opinion on the topic and even the initial responses were in a condescending, mildly aggressive tone. The subjects in both Group A and Group B argued back and forth for approximately 45 minutes, with each response becoming increasingly more and more hostile. Both debates shifted quickly from rudely persuasive to blatant attacks on the other subject’s intellect, appearance, and lifestyle, despite none of the subjects having ever met or interacted prior to testing.

After the 45 minutes had passed, both groups were escorted into two separate, empty testing areas and informed that the other subject was the person they had been corresponding with during the first half of the experiment. Upon receiving this information, all subjects became visibly uncomfortable and refused to make eye contact with each other. This avoidant behavior continued for 30 minutes with no subject attempting to speak or acknowledge the other in any way, causing researchers to end testing due to the extreme, mind-blowing awkwardness experienced by everyone involved.

Directly following the experiment, all test subjects were allowed to return to their private quarters to sit on their beds facepalming for a 2 hour cool-down period. Afterwards, Subject B-2 was interviewed by an on-site psychologist regarding the sudden and extreme change of behavior, a portion of which is transcripted below.

Interview 4-B-1

Dr. [REDACTED]: You seemed incredibly worked up about what was said, why didn’t you confront Subject B-1 in person?

Subject B-2: I…I don’t know.

Dr. [REDACTED]: You threatened to [DATA EXPUNGED] his mother.

Subject B-2: Yeah…I did say that. Shit.

Dr. [REDACTED]: Do you regret what happened?

Subject B-2: They were wrong! I mean, they’re no better. They said-

Dr. [REDACTED]: Answer the question, B-2.

Subject B-2: I don’t know...it…it was ridiculous. It just…it all seems so stupid when I actually think about it. I’m…I’m an asshole…I’m a huge asshole.

Dr. [REDACTED]: That’s all we need. You may leave now, B-2.

Subjects include two males of caucasian descent, both in their early twenties

Subjects are instructed that they are to have a debate regarding a recent incident of police brutality that resulted in no indictment of the officer involved. For this experiment, the subjects selected were determined to have very different political views and religious beliefs. The testing area is fitted with two wooden podiums, both equipped with microphones. Subjects are provided no statistics or concrete details of the case, and must debate using only information they already know, or their own opinions.

After each subject had chosen their stance on the topic of debate, they were allotted 10 minutes to prepare their case. After this period, both assumed positions at the podiums and were instructed to begin. The first subject made the argument that police were supposed to protect citizens and not harm them, which the second subject countered by saying the man involved was dangerous and that deadly force was the only viable option. The two subjects bounced the same sentiment back and forth for approximately 45 minutes, and both quickly became visibly frustrated.

By the hour mark, the original topic of the debate became secondary to another argument proposed by the second subject; that the first subject was a total f*g. The first subject immediately entered a rage state, and began to shout about alleged sexual encounters with various women in cringe-inducing detail. The second subject was relentless however, and adamantly insisted the other subject was still a total f*g. 13 minutes after this new topic was introduced both subjects took off their shirts and began to circle each other while pounding on their chests.

At this point, both subjects began grunting and striking one another, no longer speaking in any known language except for the repeated usage of the words 'total f*g'. During the next 4 hours, the subjects managed to knock over and significantly damage both podiums but surprisingly only caused minor injury to each other, although both had previously assured research staff that they “definitely lift”.

Subjects include 6 females of caucasian descent, all aged at 16 years old

Subjects are placed in the testing area and are provided only an ipod containing this year's top 40 tracks, as well as a small compatible speaker.

At first, all subjects seem wary of each other. No subjects attempt to interact with the ipod or corresponding speaker, and instead choose to twirl their hair and exchange menacing glances.

27 minutes into the experiment, one of the subjects, who was chosen specifically because of their astounding score of 353464 on the Myer-Briggs Bitchiness test, is the first to speak, demeaning the other subjects and informing them she was going to use the provided ipod. Subject then begins browsing the music library on the ipod, settling on Katy Perry's [REDACTED].

Exactly 12 seconds into the track, an anomalous phenomenon occurred, causing all subjects to begin singing along to the selected music. Subjects then began to dance around in an infantile manner, as the volume of their singing increased tremendously. Within 45 seconds, the subjects' combined noise had increased to the point where researchers had no choice but to disable the audio feed, as the gain from the subject's collective wailing now produced nothing but ear-piercing feedback.

As the phenomenon continued, several researchers began to complain of headaches, irritability, and homicidal thoughts, even when out of hearing range of the subjects themselves. 58 minutes into testing, the soundproof glass of the testing area shattered, causing the subjects' screeching, which has since been compared to 'several thousand needles being shoved into the ears, eyes, and rectum simultaneously' to overwhelm all research staff, resulting in [DATA EXPUNGED] casualties and [DATA EXPUNGED] injuries.

Subject is a straight male of caucasian descent between the ages of 14 and 17, from a very strict, evangelical family

Subject is placed in the testing area, and provided a computer with no restriction of internet access. Subject is given no instructions other than to browse whatever he feels most interested in. It is to be noted he has never been allowed unsupervised internet access.

The first few minutes, subject seems to absent-mindedly browse Reddit. Topics include skateboarding, the actor Nicholas Cage, and other seemingly unrelated queries in the realm of pop culture. This continues for exactly 4 minutes into testing, when the subject's behavior immediately shifts as Reddit is closed, and a pornographic website is accessed.

Most data was lost after this point, as researchers began to feel physically ill upon realizing the specifics of the pornography the subject had chosen. This included [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], and something called [REDACTED].