#teeleah

"I'm sorry but that's just not good enough. Why the wait? What's changed? You sure as hell weren't like this before we went to that agency." *briefly pauses* "I'm your WIFE!" *visibly upset* "I deserve real answers!"

"You're right...I'm sorry. It's just hard for me to even think about the situation. Every time I do, I see red." *takes a deep breath* "Aight, like you said, everything was fine before Elite...before I met with that adoption counselor. I went in there with an open mind and we actually ended up having a great conversation. It made me feel better about our adoption plan being open."

"Well, at least that was positive." *trying to help*

"Yeah it was, until shit went left." *shakes his head* "So as we were finishing up, I asked how she handled re-uniting with her son. She told me it was difficult for him at first but, they're great now. Before I could leave, the director came in. After she gave her praise, she asked her to show me old pictures of her and her son. She clearly didn’t want to, but the director wasn't having that. As soon as I saw that first one, I knew exactly who she was.” *takes another deep breath* "Baby, she was holding ME...same hospital room, balloons, blanket...shit, everything I had with my dad.”

“Damn…” *completely shocked* 

“Of course she tried to explain and apologize but, it was only to save her job. Now as far as I went, she claimed her life wasn’t fit for a baby. She swore she wanted to get involved later but realized I was better off." *chuckles* "All of that would’ve been believable if she didn’t start a new family after I was born. I looked her up. She got married at eighteen with a one year old, three years after having me. She was never coming back. The way she looked at me, talked to me...humph...I was just another client she was trying to sell her story to. She had an opportunity and chose to lie. I really meant nothing to this woman." *desperately fighting his emotions*

*shakes his head* “Shit is embarrassing…I’m a grown ass man letting this get to me.”

“Hey…" *rubbing his back* "There’s no time limit on being affected by fucked up shit. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Plus you've done a great job of keeping it together. I'd be in here all over the place, crashin out n shit." *both laughing*

"That IS true." *both smiling*

"But in all seriousness, your feelings are valid."

"Yeah...I think I know where this going." *smirking* "You tryin to get me to see The Lady?"

*smiling* "Yes, I am. Therapy helped, me, your aunt, and your uncle. You should probably see the one he went to since she knows your family background."

"Hmmm..." *nodding* "I might give it a shot. Whatever it takes to get back on track, right?"

"Yup...This house ain't gonna fill itself." *smiling*

"Oh you stealing my lines now?" *gives her a kiss*

"Yup..." *giggles* "Come on..." *gets up grabbing his hand* "It's been a long day, let me help you relax. We can leave all this for tomorrow."

To Be Continued.....

"Alright, now tell me everything that's going on."

"Ok..." *lets out a deep sigh* "About a month ago, we started working with Elite adoption agency. We finished everything: two applications, background checks, and the interview. The director loved us and I was really confident that things were moving in the right direction. Even though Mo wasn’t a hundred percent okay with the open part, he wanted this to work.”

“Right.” *nods in agreement*

“So towards the end of the meeting, the director suggested that he talk with the adoption counselor to get a better view of how to navigate things between all parties. Well after about fifteen minutes, he came back, said this isn't the place for us, and rushed me out of that office."

"That's insane...Did he ever tell you what happened?"

"Nope. I was going to push but, I decided not to. Clearly someone was out of line and with this situation, we can't afford any problems."

"Oh I definitely understand."

"Exactly." *shakes her head* "So after that, I got in touch with our lawyer to schedule a meeting for another agency he uses. In my head, although it was a small set back, we were still moving forward. Humph, well I definitely assumed wrong because Mo backed out last minute. He has yet to agree on another time. At first I chalked it up to his album release and all the press and praise behind it but, that's passed and he still hasn't said shit."

"I don't know girl, I'm getting nervous. I get the feeling that he doesn't want to do this anymore and if that's the case?....." *gets emotional*

"Well, listen. I wouldn't take it that far. Moses wants a family just as bad as you. Whatever happened at that agency must've got to him. I really think you should take a breath..." *smiling* "...And just talk to him...calmly." *both chuckling* "Don't let this go on without any answers boo."

"I'm always CALM okay?" *smirking* "You're right, though. I was gonna sleep on it but, I’ll talk to him tonight.” *pulls out her phone to send a long winded and CALM text*

To Be Continued..........

*after talking for a while* "As you can see, even though every experience is different, the willingness to meet and share aspects of their lives is what truly helps both parties. And again, you are the parents so you ultimately decide the route you want to take. We just strongly encourage openness as it helps adoptees cope. So if you have anymore questions, please don't hesitate to ask."

"I do have one...How was your experience reconnecting with your son?"

"Umm..." *lets out a deep sigh* "It was tough for both of us. If I could go back, I would have never chosen for it to be closed. I believe that's what hurt him the most. It fueled that feeling of abandonment and caused the question of why?"

"Wow, that hits close to home.” *shakes his head* “I get it now.”

*attempts to look sympathetic* “So your family never told you why she had to leave?"

"Nope. I don't know anything about her. Not even her name. It's interesting that you said she had to, I always assumed she just left. I guess this line of work changes the way you think."

"It does. Plus, these decisions don't come lightly. It didn't for me." *gets interrupted by a knock on the door*

"Hey guys, sorry to interrupt. I'm just checking in. Moses your wife had a list of questions. I'm sure I was being interviewed." *laughing* "So did Moriah help or?..."

"She definitely did."

"Oh good. I hope she told you all about her son as well. Their story is just so touching. She even has pictures from when he was a newborn until about three months old. Why don't you show him?"

“I’d rather not. Today was pretty heavy.”

“I happen to think it would help.” *stares at her* “You show everyone that comes through these doors. It’s always appreciated.”

“Okay.” *looks nervous as shit*

*Moses' silence speaks volumes*

"I can explain. Please let me explain. Janice can you give us a second?” *pleading*

*puts the picture down* "You should vet your employees more thoroughly. That baby she's holding…. is me. I have a similar one with just my father...Same outfit, same blanket, same balloons, same room."

"What???" *in shock* "Is he saying you're his birth mother?"

"Yes...but I can explain."

"Explain???" *turns to Moses* "I am so sorry for this, Mr. Muse. If I had any inclination, I would've..."

"Oh that's bullshit!" *cuts her off* "I told you there was a conflict of interest and you still pushed!"

"You're his damn birth mother! Nobody would ever assume that's what you meant! Then after that, you lied! You've been lying...for years!"

"I only lied to help other families. People tend to be more open when they can relate. I didn't hurt or hinder, it only made things better. No one would've ever expected him to come through these doors." *looks at Moses* "I am so sorry. I know you probably have questions. I really thought your family would have at least let you know something. I didn't want to leave, but my life at the time was very unstable. It was no place for a fifteen year old let alone a baby. I knew you would be safe with your dad, so when I was forced to move hours away, I left you with him. The next few years I thought of trying to reach out, but before I knew it, I was pregnant again. Miles died and I didn't want to complicate your life anymore so, I stopped. And look how you turned out? You have the life of your dreams."

"What about your family, Do they...?"

"My husband does but my children?...Absolutely not. Just like with you, it would've complicated things. Even with them being adults now."

"I guess you carved out a nice life for yourself as well." *smirking to hold back rage* "Well, look, I'm sure my wife is wondering what's taking so long." *gets up* "I'm gonna head out. We won't be coming back so you two take care."

To Be Continued........

Nearly Two Hours Later......

"So, I believe we've covered everything. I know the interview portion was long, but I promise you'll see it was well worth it. You two will easily be matched. Financial stability aside, you guys are well educated, highly successful, and very personable. Now with that being said, is there anything about open adoption that you're not fully comfortable with? I noticed you tensed up when discussing the contact options for birth mothers as your child grows." *looks at Moses* "It's completely normal to be weary. Most people aren't initially excited about that, but realize over time how important it can be."

"I definitely understand the benefits. I just know that things don't always work out as planned. What if the birth mother decides limited contact is too hard? What if she wants more time? What if our child doesn't want her to be involved anymore?"

"I'm actually glad you mentioned that. You're absolutely right. Everything you asked, and then some, has happened. Parenting isn't easy and adoption piles on more. That's why, if anything does arise, we have the counselors, therapists and mediators to help navigate as needed. Also, keep in mind that you will be the legal parents. Although we encourage visitation and contact, it's not legally binding. If it becomes a problem, you make the best decision for your child." *continues looking at Moses* "I think you would benefit from talking to our head counselor. She was a birth mother with a closed adoption and had to go through reconnecting with her son as an adult. That process wasn't easy for the both of them but thankfully they're in a much better place. While you're doing that, I'll answer any questions you have, Leah."

"Sounds good to me." *scrolls through her notes*

"Alright, Moses you wait here for a sec. Let me tell her you're coming."

A Few Minutes Later......

"I'm sorry but it really is a conflict of interest. I don't feel right talking to him. Why can't you have someone else do it?"

"Because you're the HEAD of this department! We're not lawyers Moriah...There is no conflict of interest. Just keep your mouth shut about your friend. Trust me, he's not going to ask about finding her. He barely thinks contact should be allowed for a kid. Why do you think I'm sending him to talk to you? We all need this win, so please don't fuck it up. Plus, I feel for his wife. She tried IVF, but her eggs are bad. You know I had my own issues with that. If you came to me earlier, I would have suggested someone else do this. Just pretend you don't know his birth mother and take it from there."

To Be Continued...…..