#ted barrie

See @junkmixart’s slasher bros and final girl in this story. Also, just check them out because they do good work.

Pandora hefted the bag on her back off and began digging through it, frustrated as she finally began pulling out her defense tools and put them on the table at the small coffee shop she’d been going every day while gathering information on the serial killers on campus. She KNEW she had a chapstick in there somewhere! Ugh, this kinda thing drove her nuts! 

“Are you okay?” A voice called from her left. She turned around to see a girl with light tan skin, light brown hair that fell past her shoulders, amber eyes, a pink t-shirt, dark jeans and neon orange tennis shoes. She had a messenger bag over her shoulder covered in colorful, cutesy pins and had several little plushes hanging off one side.

She flushed, embarrassed as she covered her weaponry with one hand as she muttered, “I can’t find my chapstick...”

“Oh, I just bought a pack earlier!” The girl said, pulling an open pack from her bag and held it out in offering, “I always get packs with lots of flavors, you can pick whatever you’d like!”

“Uh, thank you.” She said, considering her choices before picking cherry flavored. Once she looked up, she saw the girl giving her a curious look.

“I haven’t seen you around before, did you just transfer? Or are you a freshman?” the brunette asked.

“Oh, uh, transfer.” Pandora said, stuffing the chapstick into her pocket... where her other one was, seriously?!

“Well, welcome! I’m Penny, what’s your name?” She said, holding out her hand.

“Pandora.” She said, shaking her hand before she began repacking her bag.

Penny stood and watched as she repacked her bag, looking concerned. Pandora was about to ask her why when she said, “Look, I know there’s been a lot of scary stuff around campus, but don’t you think you’re carrying a lot? Doesn’t that hurt your back?”

“I’m fine.” Pandora said, “But thanks.”

“Ya know, if you’re that nervous, a bunch of girls have started walking together in groups, and Ted has been walking some girls back to their dorms when it’s dark!”

“Ted?” Pandora repeated. 

“Yeah, Ted Barrie, he’s a football player, number thirteen? He’s such a sweetie! He also jogs early in the morning and we go for runs sometimes!”

“So you two are friends?” She asked, both surprised this girl had spent time with a serial killer without getting a scratch and a little happy for any information she could get.

“I mean, I like to think so.” She said, “We both are into morning jogs, prefer red gatorade to the other flavors and he loves cute plushy charms like I do. His favorite is this one that looks like a football while also being a bear head. His coach gave it to him as a good luck charm and he carries it around with him everywhere, it’s kinda cute how much he likes it.”

“Really?” Pandora asked, before sitting down and motioning to the seat opposite her, “You mind telling me more? After all those incidents, I’d rather know more about the people offering to look out for me, ya know?”

Penny nodded and happily hopped into the seat across from her, “I get that, but Ted is super sweet. Some girls think he’s a creep because he drools a lot, but he hurt his jaw badly when he was a kid and it just doesn’t line up like everyone else’s. He has a hard time talking in more than grunts because of it, but I know sign language so we communicate that way.” She then rubbed at her arm, “I think he’s sensitive about his jaw and that’s why he has that metal thing on his face and always wears a helmet.” She then looked from left to right and whispered, “And yesterday, I saw a lot of blood mixed into the drool, he’d taken a hard hit in the game he played the night before and I’m really worried that he got hurt. I told him to go to the hospital and get checked out, but he won’t do it. So if you see him, will you check to make sure his drool doesn’t have blood in it?”

“Sure, I can do that.” Pandora promised. Blood could either mean he took a victim or he was injured, once she knew more about him, she’d be able to know for certain what that meant.

She brightened, “Thanks! You’re so nice! I think you’ll do really well here!”

“Thanks.” She said, then in a quiet voice said, “Well, now I know Ted is okay, is there anyone you think I should look out for?”

Penny frowned a bit, “You mean, like dangerous or just rude?”

“Both.” Pandora told her.

“Well, I don’t think I know anyone like that personally...” She said as she tapped at her chin.

“Well well well.” A male voice purred from next to them, Pandora turned and saw a man with tanned skin, lots of piercings, light colored eyes, what looked almost like leopard spots on his shoulders and elbow length gloves and a purple t-shirt and green pants, “If it isn’t our favorite dog walker?”

“Dog walker?” Pandora managed, struggling not to reach back into her bag and stun gun the man in front of them.

“Oh hey Vance!” Penny said, before motioning to her, “This is Pandora, she transferred here a little while ago! Pandora, this is Vance Amaral, he throws the craziest parties on campus!”

“I don’t know about ‘crazy’,” He purred, “But I bet they’d be more fun if you joined in, Pen.”

“Sorry Vance.” She said, looking genuinely sorry for being unable to attend the mad man’s party, “But Calculus is kicking my butt this semester and I really need to keep my grades up to keep my scholarship...” 

“I know, you’ve apologized every day this semester.” He said with a wave of his hand, “I guess I’m just a bit put out that you can get up early to go for a run with Ted and take Maxim’s dog out but won’t stay up late at one of my parties.”

“Maxim?” Pandora repeated, reminding the party animal before her that she was still there.

“Yeah, Maxim Moon, he’s total creep. He doesn’t bathe, he’s constantly looking for an internet girlfriend, you know the type. Red flags all over? Most likely to end up with a bag over their head while being arrested for some sort of awful crime?” Vance told her as he counted the negative things about the other man off his fingers.

“He’s not that bad...” Penny said, although she didn’t sound like she really believed her own words.

Vance looked at Pandora and said, “Help a guy out here, Panny, won’t you?” Pandora stiffened at ‘Panny’, struggling to contain her rage as he continued on to say that, “Ted and I’ve told Penny to stay away from him about a hundred times, but she just feels so sorry for that dog of his. A dog who, by the way, doesn’t even like it’s master. It bites him!”

“Samson.” Penny said, “His dog’s name is Samson.”

Vance smiled at Pandora and rolled his eyes in almost an affectionate manner as if to say ‘see what I mean?’ 

“If Vance here says he’s dangerous, maybe you should stop helping him with his dog.” Pandora advised, although it was odd to hear a serial killer talk badly of another serial killer, but at the same time, she’d only dealt with one psycho freak at a time, so it may be more common than she thought. “He should be taking care of his own dog anyway.”

“Thank you!” Vance cried, exasperated.

“Well, I really don’t mind taking Samson out for a walk or playing with him. And Maxim doesn’t really talk to me much outside saying thank you every now and then” She said, then looked to Vance, “And even if Maxim did try anything, you and Ted would stop him, right?” 

“Of course we would!” Vance assured her, “My parties wouldn’t be half as good without the cupcakes you make for me!”

“You make him cupcakes?” Pandora asked.

“My family owns a bakery and when I get nervous or stressed about something, I bake.” Penny said bashfully, “Last semester I went really overboard around finals and made way too many triple chocolate brownies and my sorority sisters told me if I brought a single one near the house, I would be kicked out and banned from the building for life. Vance saw me crying over them and offered to take them for his party.”

“They were so good!” Vance gushed, “I’ve been hooked to her sweets ever since!”

“Huh, well, maybe next time you stress bake, I should try one.” Pandora said.

“Oh, Panny!” Vance said, draping an arm around her shoulder, “You’re in for a treat! Her oatmeal raisin cookies are better than any chocolate chip cookie I’ve ever had! She converted me into an oatmeal raisin loving heathen!”

“I doubt that she’s the reason you’re a heathen.” Pandora deadpanned as she lifted his arm off her shoulder with a shift motion. Vance let out a dramatic gasp, “You wound me, Panny!” before he hissed into her ear, “Careful, I might want to get payback.”

“Bring it.” Pandora snipped back before there was a loud bark and they all looked to see a Doberman with completely yellow eyes and no pupils running towards them, dragging some poor soul behind it until it stopped by Penny’s chair and left the one holding the leash to crash into another table.

“Samson!” Penny squealed before hopping from her chair and gently scratching at the dog, it’s tail wagging as she cooed at it.

“That dog’s eyes have no pupils.” Pandora muttered to herself.

“Yeah, it’s creepy.” Vance agreed, “But not as creepy as it’s master.” He said as a greasy looking young man with glasses that you couldn’t see his eyes through and uneven teeth pulled himself off the ground with a groan, what looked like a spell book under his arm, “Dammit Samson, I told you, we need to go back to my room!”

“It’s okay, Maxim, I don’t mind that he comes to say hi.” Penny told him cheerfully. His cheeks flushed and he snapped, “that’s not the point! I’m his master, he should listen to me!” 

The dog growled at him and he stiffened, then scowled as Vance laughed, “Ha! Made a bitch by your own dog!”

“Shut up!” He snapped, then noticed Pandora, “Who’s this female?” he asked, looking her up and down.

“Female?” Pandora repeated, disgusted as he seemed to smirk as he looked her over.

“Oh, sorry.” Penny said, “This is Pandora, she just transferred! Pandora, this is Maxim.” She then rubbed the dog more and had him happily panting with his tongue lolling out, “And this little cutie is Samson!”

“Charmed to meet you.” Maxim said, holding out his hand, sending an awful smell in her direction that made her almost gag. Pandora made no move to take the offered limb as she decided that taking this one down was going to require more long distance weapons due to the smell and he scowled when he realized she wasn’t moving, “Well aren’t you rude!” he snapped.

“Have you bathed?” She asked pointedly, making Vance laugh even harder.

“No, no he has not!” another voice called behind him, making the group turn to see a man wearing a suit and a weird white mask and a bigger man with dark skin wearing school colors and a football helmet with what looked like a small bear trap where his mouth would be.

“Oh, hey Blake! Hey Ted!” Penny said, as if they didn’t look completely out of place out here in public as she began to sign with one hand, “What are you guys doing here?”

The larger man, probably Ted, began signing only for the man in the suit, probably Blake, to cut him off, “It’s our turn to drag Maxim to the showers.”

Maxim pointed at them and shouted, “Samson, defend me!”

Samson didn’t move an inch, choosing to instead continue to enjoy rubs from the brunette who was telling him how he was ‘such a pretty puppy, yes you are!’

“Traitor!” Maxim accused before Ted easily lifted him over his shoulder and signed to Penny, who stopped rubbing the dog to sign back, “No, we’re okay. Oh, that reminds me!” She then stood up and motioned to Pandora, “Ted, Blake, meet Pandora, she’s a new transfer student. Pandora, meet Ted Barrie and Blake Matthews. I told you about Ted earlier and Blake here is the President of their fraternity.” she said as she signed, most likely for Ted’s benefit although Pandora had a feeling that he understood what they were saying without signing.

Ted signed once again before she began signing back as she said, “Oh, I was telling her about how you walk some of us girls back to our buildings after dark.” Ted’s eyes widened and he looked to Pandora and nodded before giving her a thumbs up. Most likely confirming this information, although the blood that trickled out with the drool was not comforting. 

“Um,” she indicated the red in his drool, “Are you okay?” 

Penny immediately jumped in on that and began bombarding the large man with questions concerning his health. While Blake made his way over to Pandora and held out his hand, “Blake Matthews, pre-med student, President of K I II fraternity.”

“Pandora Song. Transfer student.” She said, taking it and giving it a firm shake.

Blake withdrew his hand and said, “Odd you’re wearing such long sleeves on a warm day like this.” 

“Says the man wearing a suit.” Pandora replied. Vance snorted and Maxim laughed out loud.

“Yes, well, it never hurts to look your best.” He said, indicating the suit before handing her a card, “Just in case you change your mind and want to get that” He said, indicating her face, “Fixed up.” before walking towards Ted.

That was it, she was taking out rich boy Blake out first.

Pandora watched as Penny chatted with three serial killers easily and turned to the fourth one still sitting next to her at the table. She should probably keep Penny close or else she’d probably become one of the mens’ next victim. 

“Hey Penny.” she called, getting everyone’s attention.

The Brunette and three men looked over to her, “Yeah?”

“Uh,” God this was kinda embarrassing to ask out loud now, but she couldn’t just leave this girl in danger with a bunch of serial killers, “Thanks for talking with me, would it be okay if we could hang out again some time?”

Penny brightened, “Sure! Here, let me get my phone so we can swap numbers!”

Oh right, her phone... she pulled her backpack up and began digging through it “Phone... phone...” she muttered as she moved things around. After a minute of rummaging around, she pulled out two box cutters out of her bag with a frustrated huff. Vance stared at her as she placed a pair of bronze knuckles and a small can of pepper spray on the table with the box cutters before slowly getting up and joining the rest of the group as she pulled out some weird looking charm and a small hammer and put them with the growing pile of defense mechanisms.

“Uh, Penny? Wanna explain why Panny’s got her own arsenal packed away there?” He asked, confused and concerned.

“Pandora’s gotten really worked up about all the incidents that have been happening lately.” Penny told them, before turning her back on Pandora and looking at all of them, “I mean, I can’t really blame her, some of that stuff was pretty scary...” Not realizing that Pandora was now looking at all four men with a dark gleam in her eye as she pulled a huge Hunting knife out of her bag before she went back into her backpack. “But I bet if we all spend more time with her, she’ll start feeling safer!” Penny said as Pandora pulled out a large stun gun and put it on the table. “After all, there’s safety in numbers!” 

“Ah HA!” Pandora exclaimed triumphantly as she pulled out her phone, “Found it!” 

“Nice!” Penny said as she skipped over and the two girls exchanged numbers before the brunette helped the red head pack her bag back up, neither woman seeing the nervous look the four men exchanged. Only a Final girl would carry that much gear and they doubted she would come to this school with all the news about it unless she’d already taken down more than one killer before. 

“This is all your faults!” Maxim hissed.

“Our faults!?” Vance snapped.

“Yes, all three of you are way too flashy!” Maxim insisted.

“And changing the way the world works isn’t?” Blake posed darkly.

Ted pointed to himself and grunted and pantomimed mopping the floor. Maxim stared at him for a moment, confused.

“Ted’s right.” Vance said, “He cleans up after himself far more than you do.”

“Everyone cleans up more than Maxim!” Blake said with a snarl of disgust.

Ted grunted some more, holding out his arms as if to ask what they were going to do next.

“Simple, gentlemen.” Blake said, “That Final Girl wants to come to our turf and try to take us down, I say let her.” He then stared her down through her mask, “and may the best man win.”

Ted then grunted something before Vance said, “Yeah, that is kinda sexist. I’m pretty sure she can take out Maxim at least, especially if Penny is around to play with his dog.”

“Hey!” Maxim cried, but before he could say anymore, Vance covered up his mouth with his hand as Penny walked up to them with Pandora’s arm hooked with hers, “I have a feeling we’re all going to be great friends!” she said cheerfully, before turning to Pandora, “Do you like Boba?”

________

Ted, Vance, Maxim, Blake and Pandora all belong to @junkmixart

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