I was going to make myself some green tea but I also had to do some cleaning around the kitchen and seeing as my kitchen’s pretty chilly, I decided not to drink there tea that does have a cooling effect on you. So I made a cup of black tea to warm myself up. But then I thought: well, I don’t wanna drink it while cleaning because it’ll cool down. I should just sit down for a couple of minutes and drink it in one go, this way it’ll have the best warming effect. And now, of course, it’s an hour later as my five minutes of social media turned into an avalanche. And I still have to go to the kitchen which, surprise, surprise, is still just as cold. I guess I need another black tea. Oh, the struggle.

The moment when you’re trying to drown your sorrows in tea and it ends up making you feel way better. Bless oolong.

I don’t like coffee, I’ve never drunk coffee, I’m not going to drink coffee. Why do people drink it? Is there any actual culture of drinking coffee? Why would anyone drink coffee when there’s tea? 

What has happened to people who only drink bagged tea? Why is life so cruel to them? Why haven’t they yet seen the bright tunnel filled with loose leaf tea? Why haven’t they yet met the right people who could show them the way? I weep for them, I do. Let’s have another sip to better days.

This awkward moment when someone offers you their bagged blueberry yogurt muffin flavoured (what even) dust they call tea and you’re trying to politely decline but internally you’re just like, “are you for real... Take this away from me, can’t you see I’m busy drinking my loose leaf oolong over here.”

I don’t trust people who make their green tea using boiling water. They are not to be trusted. Such a dangerous place, this world.