#tbt2

Come darkened starlight

I’ll lead you astray

Into the shadow of legends.

Come darkened starlight

There’s still much to say

Of the soul you joined together.

 Whisper dim starlight

I’ll find you astray

With all your pain

And past horrors.

Weep not dull starlight

As this is the way

Releasing fear and destruction.

 Silence my starlight

I’ve shown you the way

To capture a sun

And all systems.

Lead on oh starlight

And soon you’ll find prey

And reap a tale of tragedy.

 Come darkened starlight

I’ll lead you astray

Into the shadow of legends.

Come darkened starlight

There’s still much to say

Of the soul you joined together.

 Come Darkened Starlight

 Part One: Lullaby of Your Soul

 Chapter One: To Feel Your Touch Again

 When all the horrors that had been endured pursued your subconscious concentration, you would sing yourself awake. The first time that this had occurred, you had spent the day trying to remember the song as well as where you had heard it before—if you had ever heard it. On this latest occurrence, you knew without question that the song had been composed on the spot. You pressed the tips of your fingers to the sensitive flesh underneath your tired eyes. If you sang aloud in your sleep, no one had commented on it. Kylo had always been known to stare at your slumbering form for as long as you could remember. Such behavior had increased subsequent to your second death. The action was reciprocated; you hated when he was away, when you could not wake to him there in bed with you.

 That frustration would have been in full bloom had Trudgen not been laying beside you, his back in your direction. His night terrors had lessened in number. He never did sing, not where you could hear. You blinked whilst tracing his silhouette with your eyes alone. His body shifted subtly with his breaths. The low hum of the ship reminded you that this was not the Night Buzzard. Trudgen’s presence stemmed from a mutual need for comfort from nightmares and the fact that you were on a mission together.

 Ranooke, the akk dog that had adopted Kylo and you, slunk into the room. He walked the circumference of the room then exited. This served as enough of a disturbance that Trudgen finally stirred. “Hmm.”

 You shifted upwards, your hands dragging the blankets along with you to ward off the coolness offered by space. The stale ship air caused Trugen to cough into a fist as he, too, readjusted his position. He spoke then, his voice rumbling more than usual given the dryness in his throat. Trudgen asked you if you had had the nightmare again. The nightmare. It was the one that made you sing most frequently. Sometimes it sang back. Though Trudgen and Kylo knew of this particular nightmare, only Kylo knew of the singing. You thought back to the blend of voices—yours and an incorporeal one that you could never place.

 “No, it was a different one. It wasn’t so bad.” This was the truth. Had Kylo been present, you would have elaborated. Instead he was in a different section of the ship, more than likely engaged in communications with the emissary that had been sent to request his presence. By engaged, of course, you imagined he stared at the man, who would be fumbling with his words as he attempted to discern if Kylo Ren was irritated by him or not.

 You smiled at the thought and, keeping the blanket wrapped around your body, rose from the bed. Trudgen followed suit. He reached for his helmet, the only piece of his armor that he had previously removed before taking a nap with you, and tugged it on. The Knights of Ren had not changed their armor in favor of other attire since first embarking on diplomatic missions with Kylo Ren, who still had yet to take an official title different from Supreme Leader. Rey, on the other hand, had obtained the title Viceroy on behalf of her home planet. She, too, was present for the current mission. You took comfort in the familiar sight of Trudgen’s armor and masked face as he rounded the bed and reached the door first. It parted for him, however he stepped aside to instead allow you to leave the quarters.

 In the corridor, Ranooke spun in a circle. He had grown since the final battle, and you wondered if he would achieve the size of a landspeeder like some did. You ran a hand along his head when walking past then heard his footsteps fall in line behind you along with Trudgen’s. You felt as though you were floating. Stumbling in your next step, you felt your cheeks heat up and did what you could to recover quickly. Trudgen did not comment, just as you never did when he would wake up in a sweat that soaked the bedsheets.

 The scent of baked goods filtered into the air as you walked farther away from the quarters that you had been sharing with Kylo and Trudgen. Ap’lek, Cardo, and Vicrul took another of the quarters; and Rey, Kuruk, and Ushar had taken the last. Being on alternating sleep schedules prevented the beds from being shared in any manner that would have left one feeling uncomfortable. Presently, though, all were awake and gathered together in the conference room along with the emissary.

 Kylo’s gaze landed on you, his eyes pinching slightly. His vision was known to falter when he pushed himself too hard, although this did not impede him as it had in the past. He adjusted more easily than he sometimes gave himself credit for. You traced the pair of scars on his face that ran perpendicular to one another, creating a cross. He was so beautiful to you, and you felt your fingers twitch as a longing to touch him arose. Later you would. Later, when he would allow himself to be fully vulnerable, when the two of you, one soul as two individuals, were alone together. A thrum of contentment filtered through the bond that you shared, and you knew that he felt it as well.

 Three baskets of baked goods were spread around the table along with drinks. Millicent sat curled up in Ap’lek’s lap. She touched noses with Ranooke, who then moved past in favor of taking a seat to Kylo’s left. You sat on his right, the blanket that you had brought along draped across your lap and pooling at your feet and his. You hummed in contentment. Hummed then began to sing.

 At times, it was not only nightmares that would prompt you to sing yourself awake. The lucid dreams gave you pause when you woke up singing in your head.

 Kylo’s arms, secure around you, tugged you backwards. You sighed heavily and twisted around to bury your face into his chest. Inhaling his scent, you worked through what had happened and what hadn’t. Unconscious, you had properly remembered the sleeping arrangements as well as the presence of Millicent and Ranooke. The baked goods were fictitious; there were only ration bars and other MREs. The scars on Kylo’s face had been correct, as had his visual impairment. The blanket had been wrong. So, too, had the armor worn by the Knights of Ren. Their helmets had not changed, however their armor had been altered in the wake of new planets discovered in wild space.

 “Is Rey a viceroy?” you asked in a quiet voice when you realized that you could not properly remember if that had been true or false.

 “Acting emissary,” Kylo said in reply as he trailed his fingers down the length of your spine. You arched forward. The warmth of his body flooded into yours. Instead of melting into it like you wanted to, you shoved your heels against the mattress and scooted upwards. Your fingers raked along your scalp, albeit gently and without leaving marks.

 Starlight filtered into the room from the wide viewport to your left. You looked to the sea of darkness that was dotted by stars. A memory stirred, the memory of your second death mingled with details from your first. You had peered down into the water to observe life while you had been there, dead yet in a land between. The war over your soul, within your soul, had prevented you from transitioning into full death. And then you had made a choice. While pondering and weighing your options, you had tumbled through darkness.

 Perhaps that was the voice that sang to you, you thought. The darkness and the light both soothing you in their own way. Comforting you, luring you towards one side instead of maintaining balance.

 You reached for Kylo and stroked a hand through his hair, felt the softness of his curls. He, likewise, drew his hand away from the center of his body. It was not you that he had reached for. Instead, he touched a music player that you brought along most places. The song that filled the silence of the room stilled your breath. There it was, that familiar rhythm. There were no lyrics to this song, and so you had in your sleep provided them some.

 “I had a nightmare within a dream.” The confession was unnecessary, however you enjoyed talking with him too much to refrain from continuing. “I keep singing, keeping narrating even as I do. I feel so much when I do.” You paused, swallowing thickly. Once, during a similar conversation, Kylo had revealed that you sang to him in his dreams as well, that you had done so on occasion ever since you had sung to him on the day Leia had been murdered.

 The lapse into silence offered you a moment’s reprieve from the nervousness that had slipped past your guard. You willed away thoughts of Leia’s passing while hoping that your feelings on the matter had not slipped through the bond. If it had, Kylo displayed no noticeable signs. He picked up a datapad that had been sitting beside the music player along with a pair of glasses that he only wore when alone. This need for assistance, this vulnerability, was not one he was yet ready to share with the galaxy at large. More often than not one of the Knights of Ren would take whatever material needed to be read and do so aloud. Or else Kylo would order that the other party do so themselves. On days when his eyesight was not an issue, he still would not read the material so as to prevent drawing more attention when it was.

 You observed him in your peripheral. In truth, you rather liked how he looked with his glasses on. Kylo turned his head a fraction to meet your gaze, and you sucked your lips into your mouth to conceal the nervous grin that had started to form upon being caught.

 “What was the nightmare?” He seemed to already know that it had not been the nightmare, which was a comfort. You threaded your fingers together then pulled them apart. He began to silently read the text on the datapad without pushing you to speak. He already knew that you would, that you merely required another moment to gather your thoughts. It was equally an excuse for you to observe him in his glasses, the light catching the corners. His amber eyes were forever beautiful to you.

 After a time, you slid your right hand underneath your pillow to withdraw one of your many electronic pets. You thumbed the power button to wake the creature and began to play a minigame on the device while you described the nightmare.

 In the nightmare, you had danced on a bed of bones that did not pierce your flesh. Where the blood pouring down those skeletal remains came from, you hadn’t known. Familiarity had nagged at you, as though you were meant to know whose bones they were. Thus your subconscious mind had started to work through that riddle, listing off names of people you had lost over the course of the long war. It had not been any of them though. Flesh and clothing had started to materialize on the remnants until you danced upon the corpses of those you had killed. And so you had started to sing.

 Kylo did not ask you which song you had sung. His lips formed soundlessly around the syllables, which caused your heart to race. You bit down on your bottom lip, worked your teeth back and forth on it. Your fingers made quick work of the minigame and next in feeding the electronic pet. He would not sing; if you were lucky, however, he might hum the tune. You held your breath in anticipation, curled your toes.

 I buried his ashes down by the brook,

And into the meadow I strayed.

I built up my house out where he would look,

Where in my childhood I played.

 I carried her with me through the world

And among the stars I would dance.

My parents did watch my life unfurl,

And gave to me every best chance.

 I--

 And that was when you had woken up. It was where Kylo’s lips ceased in their movements. He set aside the datapad and stroked your cheek with the tips of his bare fingers. You shuddered at their warmth, at the contact that was unimpeded by gloves, which he nearly always wore. “A song of Naboo,” he said, his voice low, husky. He set the palm of his hand to your cheek, and you leaned into his touch.

 “Is that what it was?” you asked. His eyes pinched in the corners, and you narrowed yours in return at his teasing. You knew what that expression meant: any song from you was a song of Naboo. That had been your birth planet, a planet that no longer existed. You carried it with you in your heart, as did all other surviving Naboolians. “I danced on the bodies of my enemies.” He nodded, and you knew what he was thinking: I burned mine, tooke. “Maybe it wasn’t such a bad nightmare?” Not when you compared it to others.

 Kylo leaned his face nearer to yours. Tilting back your head, you succeeded in fogging his glasses with your breath, which made you chuckle. Kylo’s lips parted and he sighed then whispered your name.

 He was working to steady himself. Now that he, like you, had found balance, killing impacted him differently. It would be far too easy to fall into old habits, historic behaviors. There were multiple reasons for the current mission, some not entirely political. When it came to the creatures terrorizing the planet’s people—behemoths that were resistant to the Force—that was not a matter that Rey or Kylo felt rested with any political allegiances, though some of the senators disagreed. The same flaws that had infiltrated the New Republic and the Empire as well as the Old Republic; greed, manipulation, a lack of action. Kylo Ren, as leader of the alliances that had formed under the Order of Ren, rejected those flaws and took matters into his own hands. That was why the planet had contacted him directly. It was why few had questioned his position of authority.

 A time would come where that would happen and on a more open front. In the meanwhile, he focused on what had always been his goal: ruling the galaxy and bringing order. Not through tyranny as he might once have. Although intimidating others did hold an allure, offer him temporary amusement.

 Another reason that the mission was taking place stemmed from the fact that several species of local fauna were similar to creatures that had been native to Naboo. You wanted to know more, wanted to learn if perhaps there had once been travellers from Naboo to this planet in wild space. It gave you hope, and you were only too pleased to cling to that.

 Kylo pulled off his glasses and began to clean the condensation off their surface. “Sorry.” You glanced at the chrono on the wall. The journey to the planet was long, namely due to the fact that resources were being conserved as best they could be. Finn would join on a different ship if the mission had not ended by the time he wrapped up his current duties with Lando and Jannah. Poe and Rose were together on a separate mission; they would rest, however, as they had been deployed numerous times in the past month and the strain had begun to show physical signs. “Are Kuruk and Vicrul still self-isolating?” They had been doing so quite often. When it came to Kuruk, that behavior was normal. For Vicrul, it was newer, the same as it was with Trudgen.

 Pausing in his movements, Kylo tilted his head. You knew that he reached out with the Force to brush against the Knights’ presence and locate them. “Together.” You nodded, watched as he replaced the glasses on the bedside table. He passed the datapad to you, scrolling then pointing. You read the passage with a frown.

 More information on the Force-resistant creatures had been released, though much of it was speculation. Kylo had told you how he had killed the Zillo Beast, however that had only been one. There were multiple creatures in this case and they had been observed in pairs. While they were resistant to the Force, they actively sought out its users. Other creatures from different planets had been known to behave as such.

 “You will stay behind with Vicrul, Cardo, and Ap’lek.” A scowl broke across your face. “There will be multiple expeditions into their territory. Three parties will form.” You huffed, working through what he was not saying. Rey would lead the third group. Her group and Kylo’s would go while you remained behind to learn what you could about the creatures similar to those that had been on Naboo. “An LDS may be necessary.” The minute amount of agitation that had begun to build dissipated. Your mouth formed a small oh of understanding. “Some younglings may join Rey in training once this mission ends.”

 “On the planet, or will they leave with her?” His gaze flickered to the door before returning to your face. He shook his head almost imperceptibly. It was either unknown or undecided. That part was political. You wrinkled your nose and moved on from the matter. “You’re leaving Ranooke with me, aren’t you?”

 “Yes.”

 Relief flooded through you. You did not want to think of Ranooke facing any of those creatures any more than you wanted to think of Kylo doing so. Millicent would remain aboard the ship. Her presence was due to the feline having snuck aboard—or that was the story that Ap’lek told, which you were struggling to believe given the frequency with which this occurred. Then again, you thought, it did make sense to you. She had lost her former home, her former master. And she had been made to travel often when she had been in Hux’s care. You felt your stomach roil at the name, and you shoved it away.

 You curled your body against Kylo’s. He wound his arms around you, pulling you back down so that you could lay together for a little while longer. The back to back missions had taken him away from you for nearly a month. A mere two days together before this mission had come up. You were glad to be there with him, to be in his arms, to feel his touch. You buried your face into the crook of his neck, breathing a sigh of relief.

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Come Darkened Starlight

 Part One: Lullaby of Your Soul

 Chapter Two: A Chorus of Harmony

 Rain poured from the sky in heavy sheets, dousing whatever excitement may have existed upon arriving on the planet that had been said to bear a resemblance to Naboo. Of this, you found a painful absence. You scanned the dreary skyline. It was less than an echo of how Naboo’s horizons had appeared to you even on its most overcast days. There was a level of unfairness in judging the planet based on preconceived notions that it would be your birth planet’s twin; nostalgia and homesickness had a way with souring experiences that would be pleasant. You reminded yourself of this, and extended a single hand with your palm upwards, cupping the water that pounded your flesh and cradling the forming puddle.

 The rain, you discovered, was warm; and that did bring to mind Naboo and your childhood. You took another step away from the ship, heading down the ramp in full with clanging footsteps. Your clothing soaked through quickly enough, the puddle of liquid in your hand overflowing. You might have set your other hand against the first had you not been busy carrying a bag. Due to it containing changes of clothing, you were grateful for its waterproof material.

 Vicrul passed you on your right. Seconds later, Trudgen and Kuruk shifted around your left side and continued further in order to properly meet the emissaries that your hosts had sent. You stopped walking, waiting for the other Knights of Ren and Rey to move on ahead. Ap’lek paused beside you, and he did not abandon you as the others did as you had hoped they would.

 The scent of the rain hit you as a light breeze fluttered around you. It caused your wet clothing to cling more tightly to your flesh. It was different than Naboo once more, this planet, however it had a spice to it that caused your throat to undulate as you swallowed thickly. You mouthed a wordless oh. Your eyebrows rose. There was a specter of this planet that was not a ghost, not some poltergeist that would drag its claws through your spirit. You embraced the shade, took another step forward, and paused again. Ap’lek mimicked your movements. You wondered if Kylo had suggested or ordered him to look after you.

 At that thought, you let your gaze wander to your husband, who had been the first to approach the emissaries, one of whom was speaking animatedly in a manner that suggested arrangements for a meal were being discussed. Your stomach growled at the thought of food beyond ration bars. “Kylo said you’ll be leaving us for a bit after this mission.” You jerked your attention back to Ap’lek after he spoke those words. There was an edge that you would describe as hesitation, as mistrust, on the tip of his tongue.

 “I…” You ran your tongue over your lips then held your breath. It was too much to say aloud just yet, which prompted you to settle for nodding and uttering out a flimsy substitution. “Personal thing.” A strangled noise emitted from Ap’lek’s vocoder that sounded like a raspy clicking. Perhaps he had properly guessed what it was you would be doing. Whether he did or not, Ap’lek did not press. Instead he lifted a hand and allowed rain, which was growing weaker but not fading, to gather. “It doesn’t rain much on Naboo.” The clicking noise repeated, less raspy. You always did enjoy it when you managed to make him chuckle.

 Ranooke came to your side and sat down, somehow aware of your intentions to linger for a while longer. Ap’lek would not join the other Knights of Ren, you surmised; he would return aboard the ship to be with Millicent and ensure that she was settled in his quarters. There was plenty of food for her as far as you were aware. You debated boarding the vessel with him. If you did, it would allow you to descend the ramp for a second time to be greeted by the rain and the smells.

 Dropping your hand down, you stroked the top of Ranooke’s head whilst considering Ap’lek. He allowed more rain to gather before lowering his arm. The collected water fell to the ramp in a heavy thunk that echoed in your head and caused you to shiver.

 Whispers carried on the wind slipped into your ear, prompting you to shiver for a second time. You also took a step backwards, your mind made up. You turned on your heel and ascended the ramp. The noise that escaped Ap’lek’s vocoder differed from the previous ones. As though he wanted to say something but had caught himself. You clenched your jaw, your footsteps heavier. His footfalls soon joined yours, and they were no lighter. You checked over your shoulder. His mask was pointed your way.

 He did not pose any inquiries your way until after the pair of you were within the confines of the ship, at less of a risk of being overheard. He asked a question that Kylo might have had he been present: what did you just run away from? You shuddered at the memory of the sound, at how it replayed in your head. You flung your hands out at your sides, shaking them, as though that would rid them of whatever invisible blood stained their surface.

 “I’m running from a nightmare.” It was strange, wonderful—there was an ease with which you spoke the truth to Ap’lek. His time as Navrin when the pair of you had been in the Resistance meant something. It bound you together in an understanding that you did not experience with the other Knights of Ren. “A voice. Sometimes it sings to me.” He stood there without saying a word. You ceased fidgeting, the trembling subsiding. “I could have remained in a peaceful death, and I don’t regret rejecting that. I think I would be less afraid if that’s what the voice lured me towards.”

 “Hearing voices is a sign of—” You burst out laughing, a few tears slipping out of the corners of your eyes as you cut him off with your giggling. You covered your mouth with both hands. Ap’leks’ shoulders shook with his own mirth. “Where does it want you to go?”

 This time the silence that descended was not due to a reluctance to answer. Instead, you did not have one to offer. Your lips remained parted, your tongue moving without aim behind your teeth. Your eyes, too, shifted as you blinked. The soaked clothing you wore caused your teeth to chatter, which broke the silence. That was all. Ap’lek did not press you for more information. He began to walk past you, again understanding your needs without there being a necessity for you to articulate them.

 You recovered as best you could by inhaling then exhaling and refocusing your thoughts on Kylo Ren. Your eyelids descended, and in the darkness behind them you perceived stars. Amongst their dim light there was his presence with you, right beside you. He was light and he was darkness. You clung to him for the balance that he promised, the one that existed within the both of you. Through the bond, he brushed your consciousness. The inner turmoil that had plagued you subsided as best it would for the time being.

 Ap’lek walked side-by-side with you after he finished checking on Millicent. A breeze accompanied the rain outside, forcing the droplets to descend at an angle. You blinked through them. Ranooke waited at the end of the ramp for you. The Knights of Ren, Rey, and all but one of the emissaries had left. No doubt they did not wish to linger in the poor weather. Kylo, on the other hand, stood there with the final emissary, who held an umbrella above his head. He stood a yard from Kylo, a fact that brought a smile to your face.

 The scent of the planet greeted your senses once more. You melted into them, allowed your mind to take you through memories. Some of them revolved around the time period wherein you had trained with the Resistance on planets away from Naboo. It had been quite some time since you had truly considered the homesickness that had plagued you in those early days. Those feelings had served as motivation rather than deterring you from focusing on the tasks at hand.

 “They are preparing a feast for our arrival,” Kylo said, earning a look of surprise from the emissary. No doubt this was the most your husband had said without much prompting. You released a hum of acknowledgment though your forehead creased. There was no need for you to voice the question that danced on the tip of your tongue. “The creatures target smaller groups. They have not attacked the towns or cities of the planet directly. Not yet, at least.” A reminder that they were growing bolder.

 With safety at least temporarily promised, your mind once more latched onto the promise of food beyond ration bars. Ranooke pattered over to Kylo, brushing against his leg prior to circling as a means of gaining access to a position wherein he was able to sniff the emissary without the man taking notice. He clung to Kylo’s presence thereafter, which did not surprise you in the least given that he had taken a preference to him save for when your moods soured or you experienced prolonged night terrors. Ap’lek walked beside you, the pair of you only a foot away from Kylo, who trailed the emissary by a handful of paces.

 In place of the greens that would have been present on Naboo, there was a rainbow of orange-tinted hues sprinkled with the chartreuse. The colors were muted by the rain and overcast sky. Water trailed down the lengths of your arms, gathering on your fingertips then running down in strong, oversized drops. As time proceeded, you discovered that you welcomed the rain in opposition to a warm, sunny day. The water washed you clean, baptising you so that you were fully capable of admiring the planet for what it was rather than as a mere shade of Naboo.

 Voices carried from the building that your party approached. It was single-storied and long, stretched far and wide to encompass a great portion of the town. Research had revealed the locals preferred to remain in close proximity to one another, which was reflected in the layout of their buildings. The majority were communal. Those few with the purpose of limiting the number of occupants at a single time rested in the center of the town, likely to protect those who dwelled inside from dangers such as the creatures that had led to your arrival. More voices joined the chorus of the others as you neared the building and then entered through the doors, whereupon those voices became a cacophony of sounds that caused you to pause in the doorway.

 Children released noises of delight alongside the sound of an infant’s cries. Adults, garbed in loose-fitted clothing, chatted with one another whilst working on various crafts that you recognized from the past three standard months as exports of the planet. Rey and the Knights of Ren filed behind a colorfully dressed individual who led them towards a door situated beside a stand on which fresh clothing had been laid out.

 The people of the planet were humanoids with curved, pointed ears and eyes of solid color that varied from person to person. Their features were more easily seen in the light, outside of the rain. Their nostrils were more narrowed compared to the majority of humans that you had met. Their hair resembled feathers that curled around the shell of their ears and remained short in length regardless of gender. There were some with wings and others with webbed hands along with gills. Despite these differences, you spied no hints of segregation amongst the people. A third variety contained features more suited for land and climbing the trees; their hands more hooked and with an additional digit that the other two did not possess.

 You turned away from the inhabitants so as to not be caught staring, marveling over their appearances. They were elegant, if you had to select a single word to describe them. You did think of Naboo, of how the humans and Gungans had found peace when Queen Amidala—Kylo’s maternal grandmother, you reminded yourself—had requested their assistance when the Trade Federation had created an illegal blockade. When the senate had done nothing to assist. Such thoughts had you seeking out Kylo, who gestured for you to select fresh clothing to change into. You were proud of him, of the way he governed the galaxy through action rather than twiddling his thumbs.

 “What color do you think suits me?” you asked, a teasing lilt to your voice. His eyes danced in reply to the challenge. You recognized his hunger for what it was, and saw, too, the amusement in his gaze.

 Kylo walked nearer to the stacks of clothing that you could select from. He stroked a gloved hand along the wooden edge of the stand, careful to avoid wetting the materials with what rainwater remained on the leather. He was drawing things out, you knew; he had this way of causing your anticipation to mount. To make your toes curl, your stomach tighten. You swallowed thickly, resisting the urge to bite down on your cheeks or lip. Kylo’s fingers shifted with great care; his index finger rose centimeters higher than his middle finger. You imagined them buried inside of you, thought of how such an act would feel then. Kylo moved his arm backwards, retracing the path on the wood.

 He was more than rising to the challenge that you had posed by publicly requesting his input on your outfit. It was a game that you had played with him in the past. One that you would always engage him in.

 “I might dry by the time you pick something.”

 You instantly knew that you had chosen the wrong words. Or were they right? He looked over his shoulder and locked gazes with you. “No. You’ll still be wet for me.” The cocky bastard was right. You clenched around nothing, your body growing hot. Your cheeks were warm as well, and you avoided glancing around to see if anyone else was paying attention. The innuendo was obvious enough; and it was the truth, one that you would not deny. You could hardly wait until night fell and the two of you would be alone. That is, unless the sleeping arrangements differed from what you hoped.

 Kylo toyed the edges of a fabric on one of the clothing sets. As he drew it out of the pile, the loose fit of the robe-like shirt captured one’s attention with how they were reminiscent of Jedi robes that had been depicted in scrolls and described in texts. The memory of Anakin Skywalker sprang to the forefront of your mind. He had worn similar clothing though in darker colors and shades than what was present. The selection that Kylo made earned him a hum of approval from you. You extended your hands to accept the robe along with the pants that he then drew from a different pile.

 With the clothing in hand, you entered the room into which Rey had previously disappeared. This split off into two directions. A winged humanoid directed you to the left. Kylo, on the other hand, was sent towards the right along with Ap’lek. Ranooke trailed behind the two men. The smaller area had segmented stalls in which people could change. You slid the curtain closed, worked your wet clothing off your frame, and patted yourself dry with a fresh towel that Kylo had slipped between the layers without you taking much notice. You pulled the dry clothes on, your eyes widening a fraction as you felt just how soft they were. It felt like putting on air.

 Rey met you near the door on the opposite side of the changing area. Her clothing was slightly different than yours, the arms tighter and her bottoms shorter in leg length so that her calves remained bare. It was something that would have been comfortable for her to wear on Jakku.

 “There’ll be some local fruit with cream and refreshments.” Rey licked her lips, her mouth no doubt filled with saliva. She enjoyed fruit more than anyone you had known, although this was unsurprising given how long she had lived on the desert planet. “There is a holy day coming up. It would be blasphemous if a hunt for the creatures took place on that day. We’re receiving a small lesson in their customs.”

 “Oh.” It was not dissimilar to what your mother had once prepared you for when she had believed you would follow her career path. Your mind swam, your focus wavering. You wanted to be capable of absorbing all information the locals hoped to provide. The dream from which you had woken, the song you had sung, had other plans for you.

 Rey reached for your arm, her fingers touching the inside of your wrists. You jumped at the contact then relaxed. “We’ll quiz each other on it later.” Her words of reassurance brought a smile to your face. She understood you so well, nearly as well as Kylo did; it was one of the reasons that you so loved her, were appreciative of the hope she constantly instilled in you. “I hope the fruit is sweet. I don’t think I’m in the mood for anything bitter right now.”

 The pair of you had started to walk side-by-side through the door, the frame of which was double the size of the room’s other entrance. Rey and you paused. You sputtered out nonsense. Rey shook her head. The Knights of Ren, stubborn as always, had placed their fresh clothing atop their armor, and thus remained dripping messes. The locals said nothing, did not so much as glance their way in a manner that would suggest they were insulted by the behavior. Instead they busied themselves explaining the fruits, how to prepare them, and which flavored creams best complements which fruits.

 The garden area in the center of the building had transparisteel roofing to allow in sunlight. There were a handful of ports that could be opened, likely to allow in rain. Tables and chairs of natural wood were fashioned into group settings that exemplified the communal leanings of the planet’s inhabitants. The Knights of Ren had been directed to one of the larger set ups. Kylo stood a little ways away from them with an emissary that had greeted your group upon arrival. He, unlike his Knights, had changed out of his wet clothes.

 “May you join the chorus,” a female stated as you and Rey walked towards another arrangement of seats that was just to the right of where the Knights sat. More fruit and cream along with a variety of beverages covered the two tables present. The greeting was one that had initially caught you by surprise when the communications had begun. After reading numerous messages containing the phrase, however, you returned it easily and without hesitation. “We are grateful for you to be on Aezir’yu with us.”

 “We’re happy to be here,” Rey said in return. You marveled over how easily the words came for her; spending time on the planet of her birth and working as acting emissary had prepared her well for this kind of interaction. She socialized more readily now than she had in the past, back when you had first met her.

 The other woman rested webbed fingers against her chest while beginning to speak again. “I am called Psiu.” Cupping her hands together, she used the backs of them to point to each fruit, offering its name and the cream that would pair best with it.

 A low buzzing traveled along the back of your neck, encouraging the formation of a pulsing in your ears that was separate from the beating of your heart. It was nearly impossible to focus on what Psiu said after you caught a glimpse of movement in one of the corners, by a shrub. The tiny creature that had skittered away had been reminiscent of a tooke. Yet its ears were longer, its front paws as well. That tail, though, was the same. Its coloring was identical as well. The bend of its back legs. Your eyes sought it out in the shadows of the plant.

 Did it have predators that it fell victim to such as the tooke trap plant that had been on Naboo? You worked to keep from wincing at the thought. Curled your hands into loose fists instead. You did not wish to see death, not right then.

 Your attention strayed to Kylo, whose gaze landed on you as he mimicked the act. The connection between you had its normal calming effect. He stepped away from the emissary. Their conversation must have ended prior, as the man did not react; or else that was the man’s natural disposition. Whatever the case, you were more focused on the fact that Kylo walked to you, that you were no longer alone in your thoughts and memories.

 “You should eat.” You pinched your mouth into a thin line at what might have been a suggestion, but could also very well be a command phrased as such.

 Refusing to argue, aware that on some level he was not wrong, you selected one of the fruits—your memory failed in delivering its name, and you likewise could not remember which cream Psiu had recommended. Kylo did not prepare food for himself, though he sat beside you on one of the larger chairs. When the two of you were together in the seat, he leaned in closer, placing his mouth beside your ear, and whispered:

 “Nightmares carry a serious weight here. They are viewed as omens.” You chewed on the bite of fruit that you had slipped between your teeth while he spoke, mulling over the meaning of his words. Your gaze darted to Trudgen. It was highly unlikely that he would mention his own issues with such things. You, on the other hand, might have done so if asked why you were more easily startled.

 Superstitions were nothing to be mocked. Your understanding of the Force was limited, and for all you knew it manifested on this planet in the form of dreams. The idea that the Force sang to you, that you sang back and woke yourself, nurtured a growing numbness that you did not mind. It was favorable to the fear that had rolled in waves. The disembodied voice of your dreams, you wondered if it altered between nightmares and dreams. Memory was a fickle thing. What facts had been lost along the way? If it was the Force, did the Dark and the Light have different voices? Or was it all the same thing?

 You toyed with the edge of the final bite of fruit you had taken. Psiu and another Aezir’yu inhabitant began to speak of the upcoming holy day and what was to be expected. It was in celebration of the third season’s beginning. Aezir’yu had three planetary seasons, and the third season signified both death and rebirth due to increased fertility rates in the planet’s fauna coupled with the start of several flora’s hibernation periods. This was viewed as a balance of life, the prevention of too many younglings encountering the carnivorous plants; their dormancy allowed for the younglings to reach a size and age that they were better prepared to avoid harm or death from those planets when the first season began anew. Some of the fruit provided had come from plants that were also preparing for hibernation; their final harvest was now spread across the tables, as well as the stomachs of your party.

 One of the rituals on the holy day was a sacrificial offering. You gazed in the direction of the Knights. Only two had bothered to remove their helmets and partake in the meal. Vicrul and Cardo met your stare. Neither reacted as Psiu stated that no insult would be taken if your party declined participating in the sacrifice.

 They haven’t said what it is they sacrifice. If it’s an animal or something...if it’s someone… You did not want to be there. You wished you had remained on the ship, away from eyes that would judge you. Vicrul began to rise, pausing only when you slowly, surreptitiously, shook your head to stop him. I have to let go of my fears. This could be nothing. It’s not my dreams, it’s not one of my nightmares.

 It was not a time to speak of nightmares, not when those on Aezir’yu would believe it an ill omen for the upcoming season. They already had the creatures to contend with. You would hold your tongue regarding the bad dreams you had had, even if you were beginning to wonder if they weren’t an omen of some sort. Was the Force drawing you to this planet, at this precarious time in their year? That was a question you would ask Kylo later so that no one would be able to eavesdrop.

 Rey caught your eye. She had slowed her pace when it came to eating. Her plate remained filled in comparison with yours, evidence that she had taken a little of everything plain as day. Your gaze drifted upwards to the sky visible through the transparisteel. The rain had not subsided, those droplets hitting and pooling together, rolling down the sides into gutters.

 Why had the inhabitants of Aezir’yu waited so long to seek aid? Or had they done so in the past? It made little sense to you why it was that they had requested Kylo Ren to arrive on their planet so near to their holy day.

 Do I believe in those kinds of coincidences? You asked yourself this, posed the question to Rey with your eyes; and you could swear that she understood, that she was wondering the same thing.

 There was to be a feast later to celebrate your arrival on Aezir’yu. Though you had hardly consumed any fruit, you did not have much of an appetite, not anymore.

 Ranooke, previously sprawled across the ground in front of Kylo and you, shuffled up into a standing position. You rested your hand atop his head. The akk dog nudged your stomach with his snout. You cradled his head in your hands, calming, feeling more grounded with his presence, with his affections.

 “You have nothing to fear,” Kylo whispered in your ear, his voice even lower than it had previously been. “You are the nightmare to be feared should any oppose us. You are the Night Terror.”

 Your throat bobbed as you swallowed down the storm of emotions swirling within you at the confidence had had in you that he had verbalized. He meant those words too. Kylo Ren did not say things for the fun of it. Definitely not when it came to matters of this nature. Even if you were absent from whatever sacrifice the natives might have, he would not view it as a poor reflection of you or your strength.

 I don’t need to be afraid, you reminded yourself. You met Vicrul’s eyes again and this time offered a weak smile. His shoulders visibly relaxed. In unison, you and he reached for more fruit on your respective tables. This time, Kylo mirrored your movements. He grabbed a piece for himself and slid it onto his tongue. They’ve only shown us kindness. I don’t have to fear the unknown. I don’t have to fear monsters. I am the nightmare that monsters are afraid of.

 You turned your head and studied Kylo’s face. Traced every mole, each scar, the curve of his lips and nose. “What is it...that you sacrifice?” you asked without looking away. You had confidence in him, and so you had confidence in yourself enough to trust your own voice.

 “We sacrifice the eldest and youngest of our Mu. They are songbirds.” Psiu added the description after Kuruk grunted at the name of the creature. “It is in celebration of the chorus that we all join in life and in death. A harmony. A balance.”

 The smile that you had given to Vicrul grew a fraction, became more genuine. You had no wish to witness death, not really; what you focused on was the cause for celebration. Balance. You relaxed your body against Kylo’s while murmuring words of gratitude for the answer that had been given. Ranooke nudged your stomach one final time then returned to laying at your feet. Kylo ran his hand along your lower back, the caress unseen by your hosts. You would speak with him later regarding whatever questions might remain. For the time being, you settled to listen; the newly ended war had left you more paranoid than you had previously believed yourself to be. Or it might have been the nightmares.