#tbgreflects

ATTACHMENTS :: #TBGREFLECTS

Attachments. They keep us constantly occupied, feeling ‘safe’, and often prevent us from new experiences or disguise the truth of our transient life. I’ve just recently come to terms with how attached I really am. After years of telling myself that I’m not attached to anything, I’ve slowly found that I feel so close to social media, my parents, home comforts (read: tea and lattes), and yes, my husband. These things make me feel safe, protected and in-the-know. Coming to terms with this and accepting it has definitely helped me to be more aware of what I’m doing and lead a more focused, meaningful and productive few weeks. 

We’re constantly being reeled into the buzz of news, popular culture, or viral content that just the thought of slowing down, reflecting, emptying ourselves, is bizarre. I can’t even remember the last time I felt at ease and empty when I prayed. I always feel like my head is going 100 miles an hour thinking about an email I need to respond to, some work I need to finish off and wait, it’s already been 20 minutes since I’ve checked my Twitter?! 

It’s no wonder the Qur’an and the Guru Granth Sahib are filled with verses reminding us of death *dun dun dunnnnn*, the final abode, where we’re all inevitably going to end up. The reminder of death makes us realise attachments are distractions. It makes you think really, the only reality of our lives is death. It’s the only truth we know. And yet, today’s world focuses on driving us away from remembering death by telling us we need to be following this inspirational fitness account or buying this lipstick because it suits our skin tone.

A couples of weeks ago I was speaking to a friend and told her how I feel like there’s a heavy weight always resting on my shoulders – that I have to somehow keep up with the world, with trends, with people, with my family, with emails and messages. And she told me to just turn my iPhone off. That’s it? Yep, that’s it. That goddamn 64GB nugget is so powerful, it’s like a world in itself, and I always feel like a freaky gravitational force is pulling me toward it. I now know that ‘force’ is called my comfort zone. Turning off my phone had me feeling a bit weird and also like, “Now what?”. Don’t get me wrong, I got on with my day, but I finally eased up knowing I’d opted out on email notifications, messages, and those goddamn family group-chat notifications. It was good. I felt focused and present.

I could focus in my prayers, on my work, on my conversations with my family. It was like a completely different zone. I try to do this regularly now and, although I get anxious before I turn my phone back on and am forced to situate myself in an internet world again, it does help me feel better, calmer and more relaxed. I’m in control of the information I absorb. Not the other way round.  

Reflecting on the past year, I definitely feel like I’ve lived too comfortably, surrounded by things that make me happy and at home. Remembering death (and letting it scare the crap out of me) makes me realize attachments aren’t healthy, or particularly useful. They are distractions – and so my husband and I have decided to move to a remote place to study Arabic for three months. 

One of my intentions for this journey is to definitely to become more detached, rip myself away from the comfort zone and constantly remember the temporary reality of our life and relationships in this world.

Be sure to subscribe to our newsletter to find out in the next few days where we’re off to :) 

MUMBAI MADNESS :: #TBGREFLECTS

So I’m out here in Mumbai on a short trip to India this month and thought that I’d capture my reflections on TBG before they get swept away by dusty Delhi next week!

Mumbai is a sprawling city that stretches out across a part of the Western coast of India. I first visited back in 2010 but I guess I was a different person then compared to who I am now. I mean, for one, I’m married now and although I’ve still got to mature a lot, I feel less phased by the hype and more interested in what actually makes this place tick. 

Any observation I make is obviously from a foreigners perspective and although I like to blend in and feel local, elements of India will always be uncomfortable and alien to me. I think I’ve finally come to terms with that. 

Mumbai is mad. Literally. An onslaught of death-defying driving, gut-wrenching sewage, acute poverty and obscene wealth, you have to be ready for it or it will overwhelm you. But what attracts 22 million people here and makes them want to stay? Why do I still find Mumbai so beautiful and welcoming?

There is a lushness about Mumbai. The humidity and closeness of the ocean really helps to drive out the manic energy of the place. People are living on top of each other in tiny spaces but it’s okay. The city is a fertile land of opportunity and the glamour of the commercial industry gives it a new and exciting edge. Mumbai has grown into an open-minded space where the diversity and varying interests of its people mean that you can be whoever you want to be (without so many super-creepy stares). 

Although it’s not attractive enough for me, many people love it. The foreigner in me says that its transport infrastructure is dire and the lack of waste management is a serious risk to health etc. But I guess it works right now, just about. 

Onwards to Delhi for now where I’ll hopefully do an update. I guess you never know in India, do you?!

Have you ever visited Mumbai? Or maybe you live there? Let us know what you think of the city too :)