š + how prepared is L to cope with outliving augustine and paxton ??
He doesnāt like to think about it. God, he does not want to think about it.
Like, itās one thing to outlive some of his pokĆ©mon. Many species live shorter lives than humans already ā itās expected. But as a younger man he just ⦠assumed he would grow old next to his best friend. (Maybe one day heād have gotten the courage to be more than friends, had he not kept all of his darker thoughts bottled up. Donāt make him think about those regrets.)Ā
He thought heād watch Paxton grow up and be there for him as an old man.
Now he has to grapple with the idea of Paxton being an old man in the future and not himself?Ā
Thatās his son. He should be older than his son.Ā
He has the years to prepare himself for the whole idea, but Augustineās going to show his age first and thatās going to break his heart. Not because of Augustine getting older but because he canāt share that with him. No doubt he sometimes stares at the way Augustineās hair is greying and has to stop himself from dwelling on those thoughts.Ā
So. Heās not totally prepared. He might act like he is, but heās going to get emotional the first time he notices lines on Paxtonās face or sees larger patches of grey in Augustineās hair.Ā
He is doing a few things, though, to help himself in the future: heās taking a lot of photos, videos, and just as many recordings. For the first chunk of time after theyāre gone it might be a bit of an unhealthy coping mechanism to listen to their voices, but he knows heāll appreciate it more the further into the future he goes.