…you accuse that Tolkien guy of ripping off The Eye of the World.

…you ever think with the hair on your chest. (males only)

…you have a “Whitecloaks Suck!” bumper sticker on your car.

…your Web server’s name is “saidin .”

…you have ever said “Blood and bloody ashes!”

…while checking in at the Motel 6 you offer to juggle and play a flute in the bar in return for a room and some food.

…you refer to chopsticks as “ sursa” or coffee as “kaf.”

…you have ever “sniffed.” (females only)

…your laptop’s name is “gholam.”

…you have ever tried to channel the One Power.

…you have ever commented that someone has “well turned calves.”

…you have named your “sword that is not a sword” Callandor.

…you get a dog and name it hopper.

…you dream that you are in Tel’aran’rhiod.

…the worst insult you can think of to call someone is a goat-kissing Trolloc.

… you have ever said “The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills…” to a friend who was complaining.

…you call your chair the Amyrlin Seat.

…you call your posterior the Amyrlin Seat.

… you have ever played Foxes and Snakes.

…you walk into the local bookstore and are told immediately upon entering, “No, it’s not here yet.”

…you have ever called someone a “woolhead.”

…you have ever scratched the Dragon’s Fang into a neighbor’s door.

…you would do better on a geographic pop quiz of Randland than your home country.

… you get angry when people don’t understand your obscure WoT references.

…you maintain a huge website related to WoT.

…you wonder if Pokemon can channel.

…you talk to wolves in the zoo and expect them to answer you.

…the wolves do answer you.

…your significant other had their name legally changed to a WoT name so they can finally get a little attention.

…you have taken the Three Oaths.

…you claim to speak two languages - the other being the Old Tongue.

…you blow every horn you can find, hoping one will be the Horn of Valere.

…you have Robert Jordan’s DNA and a cloning machine, just in case.

…you refuse to stay at a hotel if the manager is skinny.

…you were amazed at how busy the Illuminators must have been last New Year.

…you keep an axe and a hammer under your bed and wake up every morning wondering which you should choose.

…you have reserved space in your bookcase for eight or nine more WoT books, just to be sure you have left enough room.

…you refer to police officers as thiefcatchers.

…you quote WoT in everyday conversation.