#tae core

sighs looks away sighs again tear falls but quickly wipes tear away

But she's sitting there, on her computer, and they turn her around and kiss her and you think you could do the same. They're sitting on the couch and you can easily picture yourself fitting in that not-really-empty-but-could-be-full spot. You all start flirting and you can't imagine him without her but you can see you and her alone. It's mostly just you trying to undo whatever conditioning you've been out through, trying to get past whatever programming you've got that makes you so anxious and sick, but you're able to picture her clearly now, and then the fantasy begins.

You don't want her as intensely as you do *yours*. You don't fantasize about her taking you hard or softly or anything of that sort. But you want to hold her. You dream about lying there on the couch during your off day, dozing on and off. And maybe something more happens, maybe it doesn't. But to you it doesn't matter. She loves you, and you love her more than you thought you would.