if it spares anyone else the silly amount of grief and annoyance I went through: sometimes the thing that isn't going right with your art is how you hold the pencil
I've been getting so down this year about being unable to achieve the look I want no matter how many materials I buy that seem like they should do the job. recently I did some inking and it was neat and accurate to the sketch and all but I really disliked the result. it felt so lacking. which in itself was weird because I used to be fine about my inking, I was using the same pens I've had for years, and now even that wasn't coming out how I wanted?? so what could be different? WELL. at some point in dwelling on this I realised that somewhere along the line over the last year+ between adapting to timed life drawing, watching a lot of videos of artists working, and experimenting with inking as though it was tattooing, I'd entirely adapted to doing long, unbroken strokes. the fact I was improving at a technique I'd never been good at seemed to just switch my brain to thinking ok this is how to do art and I'm achieving it well which is probably what I wanted to happen? even if it looks a bit wrong? so after this I consciously went back to having a lighter hold, doing shorter strokes, and it immediately fixed 99% of my problems
I think the main thing misunderstood about 'it's the artist not the tools' is that as much as it depends on your actual skill level, it's sooo much about how you handle what you're working with. even if you use something really high-end or the exact same as another artist you may not get a different result to usual. I never really see this talked about, but as much as there's no one set style you Should draw in there's also no one set way to use materials. certain techniques are popularised and encouraged, so it may just look like how you're ~supposed~ to do art. and it might seem silly to have made art for years and learned all of that complicated stuff just to discover you're holding a pencil wrong, but humans will often settle with doing something in a way they don't like for a long time before realising they're allowed to do it differently. so please if your work just isn't quite how you want it to be, consider there are sooo many ways to grip a pen and draw a line that might suit you so well !