National Novel Writing Month: -exists-
Tini; -shrug- Guess I’ll kick my own ass back a hyperfixation and actually work on my fics.
(Bystander Effect Chapter 57 is (finally) up.)

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National Novel Writing Month: -exists-
Tini; -shrug- Guess I’ll kick my own ass back a hyperfixation and actually work on my fics.
(Bystander Effect Chapter 57 is (finally) up.)

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It’s so weird to be working on Bystander Effect again tbh. Like, good weird, but still weird. I’m out of practice of it.
but whatever MC and Undyne have officially crossed the lines into actual friends and it’s cute.
I keep trying to bring myself to write an update post on my life and situation and etc. but I keep getting like three sentences in and getting an intense surge of “fuck it no one cares” even though I’m sure that’s probably not true, and at least one person will, so here’s the extremely condensed version.
successfully moved with parents into sister’s house
applying for promotion + fulltime working hours at work, may or may not get it.
got seen by a doctor, started antidepressants, too soon to really say if they’re working or not but I’m tentatively optimistic.
barely been able to focus on anything for longer than ten minutes due to meds tho so writing has dragged to a pretty much standstill sooooooo
oTL
still fully intending to continue bystander effect but like idk I can’t do fuckin anything with it lately so it might be a FUCKIN WHILE
There's nothing quite as internal conflict inducing as the stark line between "I hope your life takes you to better places than where you seem to be right now" and "You deserve every terrible thing that karma will have coming for you, and I will watch in vindictive glee" whenever someone has treated you badly.

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I know for a fact that I’m not going to have Frisk fall down while MC is down there as a safety thing but like... there’s still definitely a part of me that’s just like
okay but MC wakes up to a phone call from Toriel one morning and Sans is still half asleep and overhearing her half of the conversation. and it’s just a lot of “mmhm”s and “yeah?”s and an “okay I’ll be there as soon as I can get there...” and he grumbles questioningly against her side as she extracts herself and she just hesitates before pressing a kiss to his forehead and says “I’ve gotta go handle something for Toriel. Be back soon.”
and then by the time he’s fully awake and aware it’s to the sound of Papyrus crowing about their “tiny new friend” and every part of him feels cold, and he looks out the window and the kid is there, huddled close to her side and hesitantly looking around.
And they turn in time to look up and make eye contact with him through the window and their face goes pale and they’re already hiding behind her and
And Stars, there’s a part of him that feels pure murder brewing.
But then MC is looking down a tthem and noticing their fear-response and then she’s looking up and also making eye contact and there’s a brief moment of hesitation before she very deliberately sets her shoulders and gently tugs them more properly behind her. She’s making a choice and she’s making it clear.
And god, everything just got a heck of a lot more complicated.
Basically I just really, really like the idea of taking the concept of “MC is kind of unintentionally emotionally adopting Frisk and Chara” and turning it into “MC kind of completely intentionally actually adopted Frisk (and Chara) because they accidentally fell down with her.”
If MC was in the presence of Undyne while she was stretching (AKA Tini is having fun with this drawing and MC is HELLA QUEER)
MC: Undyne is like scary pretty. Sans: yeah? i guess, maybe. MC: Like she might not be your type but she is scary pretty. Sans, jokingly: should i be worried? Undyne: -DOES THE THING-
MC, stopping dead in her tracks to stare: ......... Sans: ...gumdrop? MC, after a long moment of poignant silence, her cheeks pink and a little dazed sounding: ...yes. I think you should be a little worried. Sans, laughing: you’re serious? MC: Sans, listen. She could probably crush my head between her thighs and I would say thank you. I am weak.
Me, @myself: write the date???? write the date. the date: lol nah Myself, @me: write???? hotland??? Me: but date?? Myself: but hotland??? and also date no work????