#t-ninja

“So the Machine wants us to go into our next mission flying blind?” Shaw shook her head. “Usually I’d be up for this sort of thing, but you barely just recovered from that GSW. Now is not the time to play hide and seek with the details.” “There has to be a good reason for her to keep this information from us,” Root said. “Besides, I’m fully healed now.” She lifted up the hem of her shirt to reveal a shiny pink scar just under her right ribs. “See? Good as new.” Shaw shook her head. “Just because you look fine on the outside doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still hurt on the inside, Root.” The words were simple but Root could tell that there was much more meaning behind them than Shaw let on. She raised an eyebrow in question and Shaw responded by rolling her eyes. “I’ve been gutshot too, remember? Coming back from the dead ain’t as easy as it sounds.” “It’s not too bad if you have your own personal physician to make sure that you’re healing properly,” Root teased. “Anyway,” Shaw said, changing the subject, “why should we even go on this mission if the Machine doesn’t trust us with the number’s identity?” “Consider it an adventure, Sameen. It’s not that she doesn’t trust us; the Machine assures me that there is nothing to worry about and that She just didn’t want the number’s identity to cloud our judgment.” “Who could it possibly be that would cloud our judgment?” Shaw asked. Root gave her pleading look and Shaw threw up her hands. “Fine. Your baby Machine better know what it’s doing,” she grumbled. “So what’s the plan?” Root listened intently to the Machine in her ear and nodded along in understanding. “There’s a charity event tomorrow night at the Waldorf Manor in the upper east side hosted by Robert Waldorf III himself.”

“He’s got a number after his name? Ugh, I hate him already.”

“Waldorf has connections to various criminal groups in New York, though it has never been proven. To the average New York citizen he’s just a very, very successful businessman and philanthropist. Our number was abducted on his orders and is being held somewhere inside the mansion. We need to secure invitations to this party, find and free the number, and then escape without getting noticed.” Shaw nodded. “Sounds easy enough. I assume the Machine will be supplying us with the invites to this party?” Root smiled. “You assumed correctly.” She paused and listened again as the Machine provided her with additional information. “Hold on, there’s...a second part to this mission,” Root relayed the Machine’s message to Shaw. “Also hidden at the mansion is a hard drive containing the identities and objectives of every undercover intelligence agent at the CIA. This information was probably obtained during Samaritan’s time and is likely being sold to the highest bidder.” “If any of this information gets leaked, who knows what kind of chaos it could cause. Not to mention all the lives that would be put at risk.”

“Exactly. That’s why we’ll need to retrieve the hard drive and destroy it as soon as possible.”

“Alright - what are we waiting for, then? We have a party to crash.” . . . . “Caitlyn Kennedy and Mara Walker,” Root announced their cover names to the doorman as they approached the grand doors to Waldorf Manor where the party was being held. Root wore a navy blue dress while Shaw wore one in her signature black. A security guard standing by searched through their bags as the the doorman took out his tablet and scanned it for the names. He nodded and looked back up. “Ms. Kennedy; Ms. Walker - this way, please,” he gestured politely for them to enter. They retrieved their bags from the security guard and proceeded into the grand corridor towards the ballroom. The sound of light chatter and clinking glass reached their ears as they walked through the large corridor and into the grand ballroom. “So who do you think would be abducted and imprisoned by someone this rich and powerful?” Shaw asked lowly, surveying the room. “I guess we’re about to find out,” Root answered. “In approximately seven minutes, the security guard at the west doors will leave his post to go for a cigarette break. There will be a 42-second window before his relief comes to take over the post. During this time, we will need to leave through the west doors undetected. The Machine will loop the surveillance footage so that we won’t be detected on the cams, and we’ll need to create a small diversion so that we can move.” Shaw nodded imperceptibly while grabbing a handful of canapés off of a passing tray. “And where do we go once we get through the doors?” she asked, stuffing the food into her mouth. “The number is being held somewhere on the third floor. The Machine will give us directions once we get up there.” Shaw looked around the room looking for a drink, and as if out of nowhere, Root produced a flute of champagne and pressed it into Shaw’s hand. “Where did you- actually y’know what, never mind. I’ve learned not to question anything when it comes to you and the Machine,” Shaw said as she downed the champagne in one gulp. “Thanks, sweetie,” Root beamed, taking the empty glass back from Shaw and tossing it into the corner of the room, causing it to shatter upon impact with the floor. “Move - now!” Root whispered, gesturing to the direction of the west doors while heads turned towards the sound of the shattered glass. They quickly made their way out of the west doors and into the hallway, staying close to the walls to avoid detection. They headed towards the grand staircase and Shaw had started to ascend the stairs when Root grabbed onto her elbow and pulled her back. “What the hell, Root?” Shaw whispered, “aren’t we supposed to go to the third floor?” Root smiled. “Minor detour, Sam.” Root pulled Shaw into an empty guestroom nearby and shoved her up against the wall, lifting a finger to her lips to signal for Shaw to keep quiet. “Well this is cozy,” Root teased, still holding the shorter woman against the wall with her own body. Shaw was about to shove Root off of her but froze when the sound of footsteps approached from outside in the hallway. 

The door to the room opened and a man wearing a tuxedo entered, chatting on his phone. He stopped when he saw the two women pressed up against the wall.

“Oh, e-excuse me, I didn’t think anyone was in here,” he stammered, turning around to leave. 

“I’m sorry too,” Root said, swiftly pulling out a hot pink taser from out of nowhere and shoving it into the man’s neck.

The man slumped to the ground, unconscious, and Root raised her eyes to meet Shaw’s questioning look. Root shrugged. “I borrowed this from Zoe. The ones I have are too bulky to smuggle in the back of my dress.”

“Well that’s nice that you guys share weapons and all, but I’m wondering why we had to tase the guy.” Shaw gestured to the unconscious form on the floor. “He was going to leave.”

“Oh, that. The Machine says that we need to tie him up and take his clothes.”

“And I suppose this is all part of the mysterious plan?”

Root shrugged. “I only do what I’m told. We’ll find out eventually what the Machine has in store.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Right.”

Root rummaged through a nearby linen closet and pulled out a bathrobe. She removed the belt of the bathrobe and the both of them quickly tied up the man and dumped him onto the bed. Root grabbed a pillowcase and stuffed it into the man’s mouth so that he would not be able to alert anyone when he regains consciousness. They grabbed the clothes and proceeded out of the bathroom and back into the hallway. 

Shaw followed Root up the staircase and down yet another hallway until they stopped in front of one of the doors. 

Root put down the clothes and turned to Shaw. “Two armed men. Both on the left side of the room. We have the element of surprise. The tallest one has a bad right knee, so you’ll take him out first while I tase the other.”

Shaw nodded, kicking off her heels. 

“On my count,” Root whispered, “One...two...three!”

Shaw used her shoulder to ram open the door and immediately headed toward the tallest man, kicking in his right knee and relieving him of his sidearm when he doubled over in pain. She knocked him out cold with a blow to the back of the head using the handle of her pistol. Shaw glanced over at Root who had tased the second man and also taken his weapon.

They looked over towards the other side of the room and spotted their number. A man standing with his back towards them and his hands bound and tied with rope to a light fixture above his head. His face was obscured by a black hood, but Shaw knew that this man was no stranger to her or Root. 

As they approached the figure and Root reached up to remove the hood, realisation dawned on Shaw. That face (and that ass) was unmistakable. Oh, shit. It’s- “Tomas! What a surprise,” Root greeted in her saccharine sweet voice that Shaw knew she only reserved for people she really, really wanted to stab. This would explain why the Machine chose not to reveal the identity of the number ahead of the mission.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met,” Tomas replied, a look of confusion on his face. He look over toward Shaw and the confused look turned into a wide grin. “Now there’s a face I recognise!”

Root rolled her eyes. “I’d hate to interrupt this reunion, but we’re on a bit of a clock.”

Tomas nodded. “I’d love to get out of here as soon as possible too, but…” he motioned with his chin to his hands which were still tied up above his head. 

Shaw spotted a folding knife tucked in the boot of one of the unconscious men. She walked over to retrieve the knife and proceeded to cut down the rope. 

Tomas smiled. “It’s been a while. I see you’re still in the business of saving my life.”

Shaw snorted. “Don’t flatter yourself, Tomas. I’m in the business of saving lives in general. Although I see that you’re still in the business of getting into trouble with powerful people.”

“Well I have to keep things interesting,” Tomas said as Shaw severed the last ligaments of rope holding him up. He rubbed his wrists to bring back the circulation into them. “My offer still stands if you ever want to-” his words were interrupted as Root shoved the tuxedo into his face.

“You’ll need to put this on - quickly.”

Tomas shrugged and started shedding his clothes. Root and Shaw turned around to give him some privacy.

“Hey, what’s up with you?” Shaw whispered to Root out of earshot.

“We have another mission to finish, and it can’t exactly wait while you and Mr. Charming Thief get reacquainted.”

“So,” Tomas said as tucking in his shirt as he walked up to them, “What’s the plan?”

“There is a very important hard drive hidden somewhere in this building-”

“I know where it is,” Tomas chimed in.

Shaw looked over at him. “You do?”

“You don’t think it’s pure coincidence that I was abducted and held here, do you? I worked a job with a new group recently and overheard them talking about this hard drive and how it contains very sensitive government information - the kind of information can be very dangerous if accessed by the wrong people.”

“And so you came here to retrieve this hard drive out of the goodness of your own heart?” Root responded. “Didn’t think you were the selfless type, Tomas.”

“I figured it wouldn’t hurt to ask for a little bit of spare change in exchange for our government’s deepest secrets.” A look of intrigue crossed Tomas’ face. “I’m sorry - who are you again?”

“You can call me Root. I work closely with Sameen here.”

Tomas turned to Shaw. “Ah, so it’s Sameen. I never thought you looked much like a Nadya.”

Shaw shrugged. “Believe me, it’s not a name I would have chosen for myself.”

“Anyway,” Root continued, “Tomas, since you know where the drive is being kept, you and Sameen will need to go and retrieve them.” She turned to Shaw.”There’s a surveillance room on the second floor. I will hack into the mansion’s security system and disable it while you two retrieve the drive. The security system can only stay offline for 15 minutes before it automatically reboots, so you’ll need to get out of there by then or risk getting caught - do you think you and Tomas can handle that?”

“Of course - this is what I’m good at,” Tomas said, winking at Shaw.

“Subtle,” Root murmured, rolling her eyes. She headed towards the door. “No time to waste now, kids - let’s move.” 

They split up - with Root headed towards the security room and Shaw and Tomas in search of the room holding the hard drive.

“Your friend - she doesn’t like me very much, does she?” Tomas asked as he led the way down the hall. 

“She’s not really a people person,” Shaw replied, checking to see how many rounds she had left in the magazine of her stolen gun.

Tomas held up a hand to signal Shaw to stop as they approached the room containing the  hard drive. They crouched down on either side of the door to listen for movement inside and Shaw heard the familiar crackle in her ear as the comms turned on. 

“Hey sweetie. How are we on finding that drive?”

“We’re workin’ on it. You found the security room yet?”

“Already here,” Root said, watching the screens. “You’ve got fifteen minutes starting now. There are two guards waiting for you on the other side of that door. Take them out and then find the safe hidden behind the Monet painting on the east wall.”

“And then let Tomas work his magic on the safe. Got it.”

Root scrunched up her nose. “I wouldn’t really call it ‘magic’, more of a convenient skill. If you want magic, I can show you later-“

Shaw rolled her eyes as she tapped to turn off her earpiece. She turned to Tomas. “I’ll take out the bad guys, you crack the safe. It’s behind the Monet painting on the east wall.”

Tomas nodded and Shaw proceeded to knock on the door.

A tall, burly man in a suit opened the door. “What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be in this area.”

“I saw a suspicious looking man walk down the hall just now,” Shaw said, pointing down the corridor.

The man craned his head to look down the hall and Shaw quickly knocked him out with her pistol. 

“Hey! What’s going on?” The second man shouted, rushing towards the door and looking down at his fallen comrade.

“Just trying to see how long it would take for you to figure out that it’s not smart to turn your back on an opponent,” Shaw deadpanned.

“What?” 

Before the man had a chance to draw his gun, Shaw had already jumped on his back and put him into a sleeper hold. Once he slumped to the ground, Shaw looked up at Tomas. “Get to the safe. We have eight minutes before the security system comes back on and the alarm goes off.”

They ran to the Monet painting and took it down, revealing the antique safe embedded in the wall behind it. 

“I don’t have any of my tools with me, so I’ll have to improvise.”

Shaw grinned. “Who doesn’t love a good challenge?”

Shaw stood guard as Tomas carefully turned the dial on the safe, listening for subtleties in the clicks that would indicate the numbers of the combination.

At the sound of approaching footsteps, Shaw quickly drew her gun and pointed it at the direction of the door.

“Hey kids, having fun?” Root asked, casually stepping over the two unconscious bodies by the door and walking into the room.

Shaw relaxed and lowered her weapon. “Root. How are we on time?”

“You’ve got two minutes and twenty-seven seconds before the security system comes back on and the alarm goes off.” She turned to Tomas. “No pressure,” she chirped.

Tomas grinned. “I thrive under pressure,” he said, continuing his work on the safe.

They all heard a click as the safe door swung open and revealed the hard drive inside. 

“Nice work,” Shaw said to Tomas as Root took out the hard drive and put it into her bag. 

Root headed toward the door. “Let’s go!”

Shaw and Tomas quickly followed Root back out into the hallway.

“We need to get back into the ballroom and leave through the front door,” Root instructed. “When the security system reboots, the lights will go out for five seconds. We need to get back into the ballroom through the west doors during those five seconds.”

Tomas turned to Shaw, “How does she know all this?”

Shaw shook her head. “You don’t wanna know.”

They arrived at the west doors just as lights shut down. Shaw quickly slipped through the doors and back into the ballroom. Tomas was about to follow when they heard footsteps hurry toward them.

“Hey! What are you two doing here? You are not allowed in this area of the property!”

Thinking quickly, Root swiftly punched Tomas in the stomach and he doubled over in pain. She patted his back and looked up at the security guard approaching them. 

“We’re so sorry. My husband must have eaten something that did not agree with his stomach so we’re just trying to find a bathroom - right honey?”

“Yeah, I think it must have been the shrimp,” Tomas groaned through his teeth.

“Only authorised personnel are allowed in this part of the property. There’s a bathroom if you go back through the ballroom.”

Root flashed him a smile. “Thank you, we really appreciate it!”

They went back through the doors into the ballroom where Shaw was waiting. 

“What happened to you two?” Shaw asked, eyeing Tomas who was still doubled over in pain. 

“We got spotted by one of the security guys just as we were about to follow you. I had to think fast.” Root turned to Tomas. “I’m really sorry about that, but I suppose you’d rather endure a little punch to the stomach than a bullet to the head?” She asked, absolutely no trace of remorse in her voice. “Well if you put it that way,” Tomas grunted, still wincing.

Shaw raised an eyebrow at Root, who shrugged innocently. “Anyway, it looks like we did what we came here to do. Now, before we leave I need to get me some more of those truffled quail eggs.”

. . . .

“I guess it’s time for me to say goodbye. Thank you for getting me out of there, ladies,” Tomas said once the three of them had returned to the safehouse and wiped the hard drive. “We work pretty well together. Let me know if you’re both ever in the market for a more lucrative career.”

Shaw snorted. “As tempting as that sounds, I think I’d rather avoid pissing off obscenely rich people with connections to the mob.”

“Well that’s too bad,” Tomas said, stepping toward Shaw to give her a goodbye kiss on the cheek. “We could have made a great team.”

Shaw glanced over his shoulder at Root, who was perched on the dining table with a tight grip on her taser. Tomas turned around and approached Root, extending his hand to shake hers.

“I can see why Sameen turned down my offer last time,” he said low enough so that Shaw couldn’t hear. “Looks like there are things that she cares about here.” He winked at Root before turning around. “Well, I’ve got a plane to catch. Got a job in Paris that promises a lot of adventure and of course a lot of money. I hope to see both you you again sometime - although maybe under different circumstances.” 

After Tomas left, Root hopped off the table and sauntered towards Shaw. “Well I can definitely understand what you saw in him - he really is very charming.”

“And yet I’m still here putting my life on the line to work as a vigilante with zero pay and no 401K.”

“We also have a dog.”

“He’s the only reason I’m still here.”

“The only reason?”

“Fine, I guess there are a few perks to the job.”

“Why don’t we head to the bedroom and I’ll show you a few of those perks right now?”